


All That Glitters

by cure_shade



Category: THE iDOLM@STER
Genre: Abusive Parents, Alternate Ages, Alternate Universe, Angst, Family Secrets, Female Friendship, Gen, I lied there's a bit of revenge in here, Melodrama, Mentions of Violence, Money, Toxic Friendships, complicated friendship, fun with supernatural entities
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-15
Updated: 2019-03-18
Packaged: 2019-10-10 22:31:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 22
Words: 125,575
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17434715
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cure_shade/pseuds/cure_shade
Summary: What does it mean to forgive and let things go? Hajime and Hinako find out.





	1. I

**Author's Note:**

> Happy new year!  
> It's been a while, hasn't it? Well I'm back with another fic... I wanted to write something where the focus wasn't on getting revenge on someone (those are really fun to write ngl) because that's not all I wanted to be known for. This one is a little different from the last two because no one dies (yay! I felt like I was abusing that plot device too...)
> 
> So enough of that. This is for all my friends still with me, who support my fic writing endeavors. I really appreciate you guys! <3
> 
> Now for what you guys came here for:

Part I

“Get rich or die tryin’.” - 50 Cent

I

 _For the life of me, I don’t understand why she keeps inviting me here_ , Hajime Fujiwara thought as she stared up at the cafe before her. _Milk and Honey Cafe,_ the sign read, _All are welcome here._ The message wasn’t meant to be funny, but Hajime found herself laughing at it anyway. Her laugh was dry and bitter, much like the winter that had just passed.

“All are welcome? All?” Hajime looked down at the chalkboard easel that listed today’s specials and had to do everything in her power not to kick it down. Sure the _sign_ said that all were welcome, but those prices said otherwise.

Hajime hated coming here; she hated it when she walked in because she felt like everyone in this wealthy neighborhood was judging her. Most of the reviews of this cafe were positive, saying that the reviewers loved how the atmosphere wasn’t stuffy or snooty like nearly every other cafe in the neighborhood was. Hajime didn’t see it though, because as far as she was concerned, _everyone_ looked down on her. Everyone except for…

Hajime could see her through the glass - a girl with short, brown hair staring lovingly at two complete strangers - it was as if she was in a trance, like she was watching a movie of some sort. This was who she was meeting, and the sole reason why Hajime would venture into a place that made her feel so uncomfortable. Entering the cafe, she slowly made her way to a table, trying her best to act discreet. The last thing she wanted was for one of the employees to harass her. Hajime didn’t know much about coffee shop etiquette, but what she did know was that owners didn’t like it when people just hung around and didn’t buy anything.

“Hajime! Hajime! I’m over here!”

So much for that. The other customers had stopped what they were doing to briefly stare at the commotion. They looked for about thirty seconds tops, but to Hajime, it felt like they had been watching Hinako make a fool out of herself for thirty hours.

“Hinako…” Hajime walked over to the table and sat down. “What’s got you so excited?”

“Besides what’s coming up?” Hinako started giggling. “Hajime. It feels like I haven’t seen you in ages. It’s so weird that we’re adults now… do you want anything, Hajime the Adult?”

Remembering the prices that Hajime saw outside of the store, she shook her head. “It’s fine. I’m not hungry or thirsty.”

“Don’t be like that. We come here to be princesses for a day.”

“That’s what you believe.”

“No… that’s what I know. Come on, I’ll buy you something.”

“I said I’m fine.”

“Are you sure?” Hinako, who was sitting across from Hajime, reached across the table and held Hajime’s wrists in her hands. “Look at me. Are you sure?”

Looking into Hinako’s eyes was one of the worst mistakes that Hajime could’ve made. In many ways, Hinako was like a child… or a puppy. Hajime wasn’t sure of when or how Hinako learned this skill but she mastered the “you can’t say no to me” look. Hajime hated it. Now if she said no she would’ve felt like she accidentally stepped on a puppy’s tail.

Hajime sighed in defeat. “Okay Hinako the Adult, you win. I’ll get a hot chocolate. Even though it’s spring, it doesn’t feel like it.”

Hinako started giggling. “You called me an adult. Today is going to be a good day. Wait here.”

Hinako left Hajime to go place the orders for the drinks. She came back with hot chocolate in a mug, and set it in front of Hajime.

“Thank you.” Hajime took a sip out of it, and out of curiosity, she stared at the receipt. Her intention was to try to get the price, but Hinako noticed and crumpled the receipt up before Hajime could get the number. But what Hajime did notice was Hinako’s signature. It was different from what she remembered.

“What are you looking at?” Hinako asked nervously.

“Did you change your signature? It’s in English letters now.” Hajime observed. “Before, you’d write your name in kanji.”

“Yes. Natalia taught me latin script.” Hinako said proudly, “Wanna hear a secret? I told the cashier that I studied abroad in Australia and she believed me.”

“Because of your signature?”

“Yes. You know, you should try it too. I think your name would look really pretty in latin - Hajime Fujiwara. It might be easier to write H-a-j-i-m-e instead of that kanji you like to use.”

“My parents gave me that name for a reason with the kanji included.” Hajime told her friend. “I don’t think they would like it if I just stopped using it… wherever they are. Anyway, I saw you staring at those people earlier. What was that about?”

“Nothing… nothing…” Hinako laughed nervously. “I started watching those girls to study their mannerisms… then I guess I just started daydreaming… I wish I was like them. You know… rich. If I copy the mannerisms, I can fool someone and marry into a rich family.” Hinako smiled as if she were proud of herself. “I will become a princess. If I can’t marry into a rich family then I will become a famous actress. So the mannerisms will charm someone.”

“I don’t think you need to do that. You are very charming to begin with. More than me anyway.”

“You’re so sweet. But you know what? I saw something scary in the news.”

“Hm?”

“Remember Aiko Takamori? The makeup heiress?”

“Yeah… you used to talk about her all the time. What happened?”

“Look.” Hinako took out her cell phone, an iPhone 4. Most people would shy away from owning a model that was one step above becoming obsolete, but Hinako was different. At this point, she was just happy to have a cell phone, even one that was 8 years old.

Hinako showed Hajime the article in question. Hajime didn’t even have to read the headline to know what was going on - the picture said it all - Aiko was crying as she was being escorted away in handcuffs for whatever reason. Another girl stood in the back, grinning like she just won the lottery.

“Who is that?” Hajime asked, staring at the grinning girl.

“Who cares about her?” Hinako snatched the phone away. “It’s so scary. I thought that I could emulate Aiko but she’s… not a good person. Or maybe… she is a good person. And that girl was the bad one.”

“Why do you say that?”

“Because she’s the one who got her arrested. That’s Aiko’s step sister I think? Why is she so happy? She must’ve been jealous of Aiko. Aiko is a good person, right?”

“She’s as good as you can get as you’re being arrested.” Hajime rolled her eyes.

“It’s rumored that the girl … _that_ girl ... was jealous of Aiko because she lived in the slums before becoming Aiko’s stepsister and Aiko is a princess. So she framed her for crimes she didn’t commit. That’s so scary.”

“I feel like you’re leaving a bunch of stuff out. Your theory doesn’t make sense. You think that because Aiko was rich and princess like, she was automatically a good person, and because the stepsister was a bit disadvantaged, she was a bad person?”

“Yes.” Hinako nodded.

“So by that logic, we are both terrible people.” Hajime reminded her. “We may be sitting here, in an expensive cafe in a wealthy neighborhood, but we don’t belong here. Just because we, no… just because you act like a princess doesn’t mean that you are one.”

Hinako smiled, even though her eyes revealed just how flustered she was. “You’re right. But I… I will realize my dream one day. I’ll become a princess and wear fancy dresses. I’ll be able to buy all the dolls I want too. I won’t have to work selling perfume to people - this will only be temporary. Just you wait and see. Don’t you want to be a princess too, Hajime?”

Hajime ignored Hinako and looked around the cafe, looking for a distraction. Hinako talking about how much she wanted to be a princess was hard to tolerate on it’s own, but having her force that dream onto Hajime was too much to handle. Luckily for Hajime, she found a distraction in the form of a broadcast on one of the TVs. The channel the TV was on was HBS, a home shopping channel, and a familiar black haired girl was showing off jewelry to some guests.

“Ah… Hinako. Look. How come she never comes up in conversation when it comes to who you should emulate?”

Hinako looked up at the TV and pouted. “It’s not as exciting when you daydream about someone you know personally. And besides… Ayame is…”

“Ayame is what?” Hajime asked, trying her hardest to hide her smirk.

Hinako shook her head. “Forget it. I’d rather not emulate Ayame.”

“Why not? Because she isn’t a good person, right?”

“I’m sure she is a good person. Just not to us… she is good to Tamami though, because…”

“Tamami is on her level. You know how Ayame is with her invisible caste system. You’re only a person to me if you’re on my level or higher.” Hajime rolled her eyes. “I will never forgive her.”

“Ayame? Why?”

“Starting rumors about me having lice isn’t very princesslike, is it? She thinks she’s the shit because her parents own that home shopping channel so she is set for life. She has always been like that…”

“I think you should really let that go… it was years ago. Ayame is not a bad person, but…”

“Then why don’t you want to emulate her?”

“Because…” Hinako sighed. “We’re getting off topic here! But I’m glad that you brought up Ayame because now I don’t have to.”

“What’s going on?”

Hinako cleared her throat. “As you know, ever since I graduated from high school last year, I have been working at Mizuki Department Store. I have saved all my money for this moment… I'm going to throw a party!”

“A party…?” Hajime repeated, as a light bulb went off in her head. Of course Hinako was going to throw a party, her birthday was next week!

“Yes. And I purposely planned it around your work schedule so you could come.”

“So I'm guessing it's next Saturday? Since that's my day off.”

“Well… Friday. Friday night. You can still come right? The party starts at 7:30.”

“I get off at 6 so I'll be able to come.” Hajime said. “Now… what kind of party will this be?”

“It's not going to be much but I rented a small banquet hall downtown. We have caterers too. Natalia helped me with this because I was too anxious to talk on the phone…” Hinako laughed nervously. “Oh yes and there's also a dress code.”

“What? A dress code?”

“Semi formal attire. That means dress to impress.”

“Impress who? Ayame?”

“Um… besides Ayame and Tamami, some of my friends from work will be there as well. I don't mean it in a malicious way or anything, but I really want this to be special, since this is my first birthday party since leaving the orphanage and becoming an adult. Please comply.”

“I don't have any semi formal clothes.” Hajime began.

“Well then buy some.”

“Buy some? With what money?”

“You work 6 days a week, correct? How long are your shifts? Aren't they eight hours long? Why are you being so stingy? You make way more money than me.”

 _But I don't get to keep it_ , Hajime wanted to say, _none of that money is mine._ However, she didn't want to open that can of worms with Hinako, so she just weakly nodded her head.

“You're right…”

“So I take it you're going to come?” Hinako asked, bouncing up and down in her chair. “I hope you're going to come! I told my work friends about you and they all want to meet the super cool Hajime Fujiwara! Are you coming?”

All it took was for one look into Hinako's eyes, and Hajime found herself nodding slowly. “I'll… I'll be there.”

“Yay!” Hinako stood up and reached over the table, hugging Hajime tightly. “I'm so happy! I love you Hajime!”

While Hinako was practically glowing, all Hajime could do was smile weakly. She should've been happy to have been invited to her best friend's party. Most people would have been.

So why did Hajime feel like she just signed up to be taken hostage?

xxxxx

While most people spent their Sunday mornings at church or sleeping in, Hajime was a bit different. As she did for six days of the week, she woke up at 4:15 am. Most people disliked waking up so early, especially during this time of year when it was still cold.

Hajime was used to it. She lived off of space heaters and would sleep under five blankets. She got cold easily which made her current living situation a nightmare. She lived alone in a cheap studio apartment that totalled about 10000 yen a month. It was a common saying - you get what you pay for - and all Hajime got was a roof over her head. Albeit, a very shitty one with how it leaked during the rainy season.

The apartment was supposed to protect Hajime from the elements but it failed to do that. In the summer, the apartment would be oppressively hot. It felt like hell. In the winter, the apartment was an icebox. It would get so cold in there that sometimes it would physically hurt. There was no heat or air conditioning in the apartment, which was partially why it was so cheap. The only form of climate control came from Hajime herself.

Still, it wasn't like she was in the apartment all the time - she only really was there to sleep. Hajime didn't have time to hang out at home. From Sunday to Friday, between 6 am to 6 pm, Hajime would spend her time cutting glass for a mosaic maker, Yuzu Kitami. It was _very_ hard work but Hajime liked it.

By 4:55, Hajime was on the bus, staring out the window and thinking. She didn't have a phone or anything to keep herself occupied, but as it was super early, the bus was usually very quiet. Hajime was grateful for that, because she couldn't imagine having to be stuck on a noisy bus for an hour.

 _Hinako, are you sleeping right now?_ , Hajime thought as she stared outside. It wasn't like Hajime to be jealous, sometimes she wished that she could be in Hinako's shoes. Hinako, who as sweet as she was foolish, didn't have the same kind of struggles that Hajime had. Of course she didn't. If Hinako did, would she be so fixated on becoming a princess? As bad as it sounded, Hajime found her friend's dream childish and hearing about it annoyed her. But on the other hand… it was a nice escape. Hinako's innocence was refreshing; it was as if Hinako didn't grow up in the same orphanage as Hajime. On the surface, their backgrounds seemed similar, but there was a difference - unlike Hinako, Hajime had a secret.

A life ruining secret.

Life ruining or not, Hajime was going to do her best to get out of this situation alive. She had to. Hajime was only 19, and turned 20 in June. She had her whole life to look forward to, and she wasn't going to let her secret make a puppet out of her. She wouldn't allow it!

“Hajime? Is that you?”

Hajime's determined thoughts were interrupted by a girl who had gotten on the bus. She was foreign, with brown skin and accented Japanese. Hajime found herself smiling at the girl.

“Good morning, Natalia. What are you doing up so early on a Sunday?”

“I could ask you the same thing.” Natalia took Hajime's reply as an invitation to sit down next to her. “But since you asked first… I swapped shifts with someone at the department store. She's usually an opener, so that's why I'm heading in early. And you?”

“Same here. I'm going to work.”

“Ah… are you still cutting glass? Four days a week, right? That's what Hinako told me the last time I asked.”

“Four? Ah… I asked my boss if I could work more days a week. I only have Saturday off now.”

“One day off?” Natalia shook her head in disbelief. “Aren't your shifts 12 hours long?”

“Yes… what's the problem?”

“What do you mean, what's the problem? I'm worried about you. Six days for 12 hours. That's 72 hours a week. How do you have time to sleep?”

Hajime shrugged. “I make time. Don't worry about it Natalia! I'll be fine.”

“You say that now, but your body will crumble if you keep this up. I don't think it's wise for you to push yourself this hard, you know?”

“Look… whether you think it's wise or not… such hours are necessary.”

“Why? Why are you killing yourself? You know overworking is a huge issue right now and I don't want anything bad to…”

“Natalia. I appreciate the concern, but I'll be fine. I've been working this schedule for the last six months. I will be fine.”

Natalia shook her head, but she didn't say anything else. She had known Hajime (and Hinako) for years - her house was next to the orphanage they grew up in. She would always remember how they met - Natalia's family moved from Rio de Janeiro because her father got a job in Tokyo at an IT company. Natalia met Hinako first - she had knocked on the door with flowers. Hinako, who didn't seem to care that Natalia was foreign or that the two could barely speak the same language. The pair excitedly introduced themselves in very broken English before Hinako dragged Natalia over to a black haired girl who wore a bandana in her hair and wore an intense face expression. Natalia was scared as she thought her new friend just set her up and the two were going to jump her.

Wrong.

All the newcomer did was say, “Fujiwara Hajime.” and then walked back into the house. Hinako started screaming something at her friend. Natalia had felt so confused and embarrassed that she wanted to cry, but everything changed when Hajime walked back over to Natalia holding a clay vase. As Hinako told her years later, Hajime made the vase herself.

“Welcome to Japan.” Hajime told her, smiling.

 _I had the wrong idea about her,_ Natalia thought as she accepted the vase. Hajime and her serious nature intimidated Natalia from time to time, even in the present day, but she was still very nice. The only time Hajime went from very nice to not so nice was when people excessively worried about her. Natalia learned that the hard way, so she tried not to pry.

But was it really prying when one was worrying about the well being of a friend? Hajime thought so. Natalia didn't have it in her to start arguing first thing on a Sunday morning, so that question was going to go unanswered for now.

“So are you going to go to Hinako's birthday party?” Natalia asked.

“I don't have a choice, but if I did…” Hajime sighed heavily. “Semi formal. What does that even mean?”

“It's like fancy, but not too fancy… why? Do you have a problem with that?”

“No. She just seemed very pushy regarding the matter. She kept saying dress to impress. Who am I impressing? Your co-workers? Ayame? Tamami?”

“Co-workers? Ayame? Tamami?” Natalia laughed nervously. “I don't know about Ayame and Tamami but Hinako isn't inviting our co-workers. She's inviting our clients.”

“What? Ignoring the fact that she lied to me…” Hajime turned away from Natalia and stared out of the window, concentrating intensely on the darkness.

“You know how Hinako is. She is very good at making connections with people. That's why she is one of the top sellers at our store.”

“You guys sell Dior perfume. Dior is super expensive, is it not?” Hajime asked in a low voice.

“Well… I mean, most of the stuff in our department store is. Just look at the neighborhood we're in… we have a lot of VVIP customers. What are you getting at?”

“She's going to invite a bunch of rich snobs to her party, because she wants to be one oh so badly. I know you guys put a lot of effort into this but it's not going to be on the same level of what they're used to… they’re going to look down on her. ‘I want to be a princess’, ‘I want to wear fancy dresses,’... wouldn’t you look down on someone with that mindset?”

“Um…”

“Don’t tell Hinako this, and I mean it. But sometimes, I look down on her too. Me, someone who cuts glass for slave wages… so imagine how _they_ will look down on her. They’ll think she’s a poser. They’ll laugh her out of her own party. I won’t be able to watch, so knowing that…”

“Are you not going to go?”

“I really don’t want to.” Hajime sighed. “You know, it’s really for me hard to say no to Hinako. I hate when she cries… I don’t want to go down in history as the girl who ruined Hinako’s party either. But on the other hand… I don’t want _those people_ to look down on me. You know that’s all they’re good for.”

“So in that case, you should still attend, so you can stand up for her. But you really won’t have to. Hinako is one of our top sellers for a reason - she can make friends with anyone.”

“Are you saying… are you saying that these people are truly her friends?”

Natalia nodded. “Yes, they are. Trust me on this. I see it all the time at work. Sometimes they’ll come in just to talk to Hinako, with no intention of buying anything. But Hinako always oversells…”

“Okay fine. So those people are really her friends… but I don’t know if I can afford such things. Semi-formal clothing… and a gift. What do I even get her? Attending parties is so expensive.”

“What does Hinako like? Dolls, right? Hm… what would you get her if you had money?”

“Tickets to the Dream Tower. But that’s so exclusive… and expensive. We both want to go there, I heard the view is the greatest in the city, and the restaurant there has good food. Maybe in the future.”

“You could still get her a doll.” Natalia suggested. “Is it okay if I ask you something?”

“What is it?”

“Excuse me for being forward but how is it that you work so much but never have any money? You live alone and your rent is cheap. You don’t gamble or spend your money on any other habits or recreational activities. Where does it go?”

Hajime answered by narrowing her eyes and grabbing Natalia by her wrist. She dug her fingernails into Natalia’s skin, paying no mind to the fact that Natalia was squirming in pain.

“Haji… Hajime… I…” Natalia started. That was all she could get out. Hajime’s nails were short but Natalia could feel her skin opening up.

“I like you Natalia, so I’ll warn you just this once.” Hajime said in a very girly and sweet voice. Natalia felt like she entered the twilight zone, until Hajime’s grip got tighter and she lowered her voice. “If you ever ask about my finances again… I will shatter you like you’re made of glass. Understand?”

Fearing for her life, Natalia snatched her wrist away and nodded, her purple eyes glassy. “Listen Hajime, I’m really sorry, okay? I won’t…” Natalia’s voice trailed off as she looked into Hajime’s eyes. Her dark eyes were hardened in a way that Natalia had never seen before, and time seemed to slow down and Hajime pulled Natalia closer to her.

“Get lost.”

Natalia had nothing more to say - she pushed Hajime off of her, and ran off the bus once they got to the next stop. The driver shot a knowing look to Hajime, who just rolled her eyes and looked out the window. Unbeknownst to the driver and the few other passengers that were on the bus, Hajime had started quietly crying to herself.

Why did she do that? Why couldn’t she straight up answer Natalia’s question? The answer was simple.

Some things were better kept secret.


	2. II

II

Natalia and Hajime had gone their separate ways about seven hours ago, but Natalia kept looping the events of that morning in her head. To her, the confrontation felt like it was only 15 minutes ago. Naturally, this had an effect on her mood. She spent most of the day pretending to clean, leaving most of the work to her co-worker, Nanami, who came in a few hours after Natalia. Because of that, she took her lunch break a few hours after Natalia. In other words, for that hour between 1 and 2, Natalia couldn't hide behind pretending to clean.

However, she had gotten lucky. For an early Sunday afternoon, the store was very quiet. Normally Natalia would've questioned it, but today she just accepted the silence. She spent the first half hour pretending to wipe the glass counter down, but much to her annoyance, around 1:30, a customer walked up to her. But not just any customer. 

“Natalia!”

It was Hinako, who had decided to show up to her place of employment… despite not being scheduled to work. Natalia found this peculiar - until she remembered what happened this morning.

“Is Hajime with you?” Natalia demanded.

“Huh?” Hinako looked taken aback. “No. Of course not. She's cutting glass. You know she works on the far end of the city, right? I went there once, and…”

“Oh right. I forgot. She's working… when is she not?” Natalia blanched. “First things first… are you going to buy anything?”

“No… I only came here because I got bored. I wanted to look at dresses for my party… and you get off at 3 so I decided to kill two birds with one stone. Who is working with you?”

“Nanami. She's at lunch right now.” Natalia said, looking down at her watch. Hinako, who was watching Natalia, gasped once she noticed the abnormal indentations on Natalia's wrist.

“Oh my… did you get bit by a dog this morning?” Hinako asked. “That looks bad!”

“You could say that… but the dog wasn't actually a dog. It was Hajime.”

“She  _ bit  _ you?” Hinako screeched. “What were you two doing? Were you guys…  _ fighting _ ?”

“Okay first of all… Hajime didn't bite me. She just dug her nails into my skin and cut  _ real _ deep. That's it.”

“But why? Why would she do such a thing?”

“We were talking and all I did was ask a simple question. And instead of answering it like a normal person… Hajime flew off the handle.”

“Well … what did you ask her?”

“All I did was ask her where her money goes. Don't you think it's weird that she works 72 hours a week and she  _ never  _ has any money?”

Hinako hesitated, “... Of course it's weird.”

“I wouldn't be surprised if she was involved with something illegal. Have you ever been to her apartment? I haven't.”

“Neither have I… but what Hajime does with her money is none of our business.”

“You wonder about it too. Admit it.”

“I do… I actually asked Hajime about it yesterday… and she didn't really answer the question.”

“Did she threaten to shatter you like glass? Did she put her hands on you? Did she tell you to 'get lost’?” Natalia questioned. When Hinako shook her head no, Natalia laughed dryly. “Oh she must  _ really _ like you, huh?”

“Whether the reason is, she shouldn't have said that to you. I can't believe she said that she would shatter you like glass… that's so scary! Is there anything else that happened?”

Natalia thought this over. Sure she could stoop to Hajime's level and tell Hinako how Hajime didn't really seem to like her at all… but Natalia wasn't sure if she could handle the fallout from that. Who knew how Hinako would take it? So for that reason, Natalia was going to attempt to be the bigger person. After all, she still considered Hinako her friend.

“How did Hajime react when you told her about the party?”

Hinako appeared to be thinking. “She seemed to be very apprehensive. I thought she'd be excited, but…”

“To tell you the truth… I think Hajime is feeling very anxious about it.” Natalia said. “The reason why I asked her that question in the first place is because we were talking about your party. She seems to be stressed over the fact that she can't afford an outfit and a gift. Maybe that's why she snapped on me this morning? Who knows…”

Hinako shook her head. “Gosh… oh gosh… I didn't know Hajime was that bothered by it. I wonder why she didn't say anything…”

“She doesn't like people worrying about her.” Natalia reminded her friend.

“But we're best friends. Of course I'm going to worry about her! I wish she would've said something. Don't worry, Natalia! I'm going to fix this!”

“You are?”

“Yes. As the hostess, it's my duty to make sure everyone is comfortable at my party. That's a princesslike quality, don't you think?”

Natalia nodded in agreement. “So what are you going to do?”

All Hinako could do was smile. “Just wait and see. Just wait and see!”

xxxxx

“ _ ‘If you ever ask about my finances again… I will shatter you like you’re made of glass.’ _ Did I seriously say that? I'm so embarrassing.” 

A few hours later, on the other end of town, Hajime was standing at the bus stop directly outside of Yuzu's studio, thinking to herself. Just like Natalia, Hajime couldn't stop thinking about what had happened on the bus that morning. However, unlike Natalia, Hajime felt like everything happened the day before. One's sense of time tended to get messed up when they spent the entire day cutting up glass.

Hajime covered her face with her hands. “Why did I do that? I hope Natalia didn't tell anyone about this… oh no…” Hajime closed her eyes and tried to push the image of Natalia and Ayame laughing about it out of her head. 

“Are you talking to yourself?” 

The door to the studio had opened and a curly haired girl walked out. This was Hiromi Seki, who worked as Yuzu's assistant. From what Hajime could see, Yuzu did the actual art, while Hiromi handled the business side of things. Unfortunately for Hajime, that didn't extend to Hiromi minding her business. She found her pushy and at times, unlikeable. 

“Is your brother going to pick you up?” Hajime asked. She wasn't in the mood to wait for the bus with Hiromi, but she had to hide that when Hiromi shook her head.

“You know, Itsuki and I used to have a lot of fun waiting for the bus together. I wonder why waiting for the bus with you isn't as enjoyable…?”

“Probably because I am not Itsuki.” Hajime answered. 

Hiromi shook her head. “Such a straight answer from the no-frills Hajime. I shouldn't be surprised. That's just how you are.”

“Hiromi. Is there something you want?”

“Huh?”

“If you don't want anything… you should be quiet.” 

Hiromi gasped, taken aback, but Hajime didn't seem to care. She just yawned and stared up at the changing evening sky.

_ What a rude girl _ , Hiromi thought, biting her tongue. She had no idea how someone like Hajime was not only able to convince Yuzu to fire Itsuki, but also get Yuzu to give Hajime Itsuki's old shifts. Hiromi found it hard to tolerate Hajime when she only saw her for the first half of the week, but now seeing her six days of the week? Hiromi always asked herself how much longer could she bear this for. 

It wasn't like Hiromi didn't try to become friends with Hajime - Hiromi did try very hard, given the history between their families. The last thing Hiromi remembered doing was inviting Hajime to her birthday dinner. Hajime reacted by wordlessly handing the invitation back to Hiromi and going back to cutting glass like nothing happened. Not only was that a huge blow to Hiromi's ego, but that permanently placed Hajime on her shit list. What blew Hiromi's mind even more was that Yuzu liked her. Hiromi ended up taking out her phone, deciding to listen to some music. That would surely ease the awkward atmosphere.

The two stood in silence for about ten minutes until the bus pulled up. Hiromi took her earbuds out and took one step towards the bus, only for Hinako to skip off, holding a bag from Mizuki Department Store. She watched carefully - Hiromi knew who Hinako was, Hinako stopped by the studio once to give Yuzu a Christmas card. Yuzu found it weird because she and Hiromi had never seen Hinako before, but she appreciated it.

“What are you doing here?” Hajime demanded. “Don't you have work?”

Hiromi rolled her eyes and got onto the bus. If Hinako wanted to waste her time with the energy black hole known as Hajime Fujiwara, she could do so. Hiromi had better things to do with her time!

With Hiromi gone, the two were left alone. Hinako shook her head. “No… it's Sunday. I never work on Sunday.”

“So why are you…” Hajime's voice trailed off as she realized that there was really only one reason for Hinako to be here - and it had nothing to do with Christmas cards!

Hinako smiled. “Isn't there a cafe around here? Let's talk there.”

xxxxx

Compared to the Milk and Honey Cafe, the atmosphere of Star Coffee Bar was way more relaxed. That might've been because the neighborhood it was in was mostly made up of young artists, or because it was somewhat late. When Hinako and Hajime arrived, there were only a few people in the cafe. Hajime found that to be a good thing. She was tired and not really in the mood to deal with crowds.

“What do you want?” Hinako asked once the two sat down.

“Tea.” Hajime answered. “Peppermint tea.”

“Wait here.”

A few minutes later, Hinako came back, holding peppermint tea for Hajime and white hot chocolate for herself. The two sat at their table in silence, until Hinako spoke up.

“I went to the department store because I wanted to get some things for the party.”

“So I'm guessing you saw Natalia.”

“Of course.” Hinako frowned. “I know you don't like people worrying about you, but I'm not just anyone. I'm your best friend. If you were so stressed out about the party, you could've said something…”

“What are you talking about?”

“Natalia told me what you said on the bus. You're worried about not being able to get me a gift… or finding something to wear. But it's okay Hajime. It's okay.” Hinako reached on the floor and picked up the department store bag. She handed it to Hajime, who reluctantly took it.

“Open it and see what's inside.” Hinako told her.

Hajime dug through the bag, which was stuffed with tissue paper. Buried under the tissue paper was a dress. She unfolded the dress and gasped - it was a simple blue dress with a ribbon around the waist. The dress looked cheap, like it cost about 3000 yen or less, but Hajime liked it. The dress was obviously meant for summer but Hajime had a cream sweater at home that she could pair it with to make it more seasonally appropriate.

“You didn't have to do this…” Hajime began, but Hinako quickly cut her off.

“Yes I did. I had to do it.” she said. “I really want you there…”

“Um… thanks. So how much do I owe you for this?”

“You don't owe me anything. I'm serious. I got this for you because I really want you to come. It wouldn't be right if you couldn't come. Because you're my best friend, I had to do what I could so you could attend. So that's why I got you this.”

“But what about the present?”

“What present? Oh right… the birthday gift.” Hinako dismissively waved her hand in the air. “Don't worry about it. You  _ are  _ the present. A prince could come on a white horse and try to marry me but I wouldn't be happy unless you were there, Hajime. You're that important to me.”

“I… am?”

“Yes.” Hinako reached across the table and held Hajime's hands into hers. “You're the one thing that's been constant in my life. If it weren't for you… I would've been lost. Every day I thank God that you came into my life after my parents passed.”

“Hinako…” Hajime's eyes were starting to tear up. Here she was, expecting to get lectured. Instead, Hinako was making her cry!

“I'm serious. You helped me a lot in the orphanage. And now that we are adults, I'm going to help you.” Hinako looked into Hajime's eyes and smiled. “So please…”

“Okay.” Hajime said. She wiped the tears from her face and smiled. “I will be there.”

“Yay!” Hinako cheered. “This will be the best birthday ever! I'm so excited.”

Then, maybe a bit too loudly, Hajime said, “You're going to be even more excited… I'm going to find something for you… a surprise.”

“Eh? Hajime, you don't have to! All I wanted was for you to come to the party… I don't care about the gift…”

“No… it's fine, it's fine. I'm doing this because I want to, not because I feel like I owe you.”

Despite Hinako's earlier opposition, she didn't seem to put up a fight. “Well if you insist… I'm expecting a gift fitting for a princess!” she said jokingly.

“Don't worry Hinako! You'll love it!” Hajime told her, grinning, but her grin faded when she looked up. Sitting at a table few feet away, behind Hinako, was a black haired girl. But not just any black haired girl. Just by seeing her, Hajime suddenly had the urge to throw up her peppermint tea. She had to get out of here, as quickly and as quietly as possible.

“Hey Hinako.. thanks for the dress. I'll see you at your party, okay?” Hajime asked, quickly standing up. 

“Where are you going?” Hinako pouted. “We were only here for 20 minutes…”

“I know, I know, but I'm tired, and…” Hajime paused as she glanced at the girl, who was reading a magazine.

“What's wrong? Do you know her?”

“No…” Hajime lied. “I'll see you around, okay?”

“Okay. Bye!”

Hajime began to make her way out of the store, however, right before she stepped outside, Hinako yelled out,

“Don't forget my gift, Hajime!”

Without acknowledging her friend, Hajime stepped outside. A bus had pulled up to the corner, and not looking at the route number, she jumped on. So what if she got lost? Anything was better than being in the vicinity of the cafe, she figured.

“You're in quite the hurry, Miss.” the bus driver told Hajime as she stuck her bus card into the fare reader. “It's almost like you're running away from something. Is everything okay?”

“It's as okay as it can be.” Hajime answered, going to sit down. As the bus pulled off, she shut her eyes, thinking. Maybe if she believed things would be okay, things would turn out to be okay.

...right?

xxxxx

Just as she did normally, Hajime went to work on Monday. Surprisingly, it was quiet, which Hajime found strange. Hinako making a fuss should've attracted the attention of the cafe-goers, that girl included. She definitely would've saw Hajime try to leave. So why didn't she follow her? 

By Tuesday, Hajime's anxiety had gotten the best of her and she decided to do something that she had never done before - call out of work. She made her voice sound as hoarse as possible, then called Hiromi, who of course, was pleased to hear this news.

“I hope you get better soon!” Hiromi had said. “Take all the time you need! We'll be fine without you!”

Hajime hung up on her after hearing that, and then went back to sleep. 

Around noon, Hajime had woken up. What could she do? She was hiding out, so she couldn't leave. Instead, she dug around her room and started reading a magazine that she found - Ceramics Monthly. A lot of people didn't know this, but Hajime had an interest in pottery. It had started when she was younger - much to the annoyance of the headmistress of the orphanage, little Hajime would try to make bowls out of mud. When she was in school, her favorite class was art - and only because of ceramics week. That was where her natural talent lied, but unfortunately, Hajime had to give it up once she saw how expensive the supplies were.

“That's pretty…” Hajime spent the next hour and a half reading the magazine and daydreaming. Her ideal life would be not having to cut glass but instead, making ceramics. That was all she wanted, for Hajime was a simple girl. However, for the foreseeable future, it was way more likely that Hinako would become a princess. 

What a depressing thought.

Hajime set the magazine down and sighed. This had been the longest she stayed in her apartment in a long time, and she was starting to get stir-crazy. Hajime wasn't a homebody by any means, and it was starting to show. 

_ This city is so big, there is no way I'll be spotted _ , Hajime thought.  _ And besides, I need to get my present for Hinako. Now would be the best time to do it. _

An hour later, Hajime was standing in front of an antiques store, looking into the window. Hinako's gift stood before her, on the other side of the glass - a beautiful porcelain doll that was dressed as Cinderella, with a sky blue tulle dress. She was wearing an ornate silver tiara on her head. What Hajime found the most interesting was that the doll looked like Hinako. 

It was meant to be!

However, before buying the doll, Hajime decided to go into the nearby phone booth. She had a few unanswered questions regarding what happened on Sunday, and it was imperative that she got those answers. Hajime placed two coins into the machine, and then dialed Hinako's number.

“Who's this?” Hinako asked.

“It's me.” Hajime answered.

“Hajime! Hajimeee! Did you get my gift yet? Did you? Did you?” Hinako's excitement was too much for Hajime's ears. She held the phone away from her, waiting for Hinako to stop squealing. When Hinako quieted down, Hajime answered.

“I'm actually about to get it now. I'm sure you'll like it.” Hajime said. “But um… I wanted to call you because I wanted to apologize for Sunday… I didn't mean to run out like that.”

“It's fine!” Hinako told her. “You're always so busy… but why didn't you say something to your friend?”

“Friend?” Hajime repeated. Her blood had gone cold and she gripped the phone so tight that it felt like the plastic receiver was going to shatter into a million pieces. “What friend?”

“After you left… a girl came over and talked to me. Her name was…” Hinako giggled. “I forgot her name, but she was nice. Like really nice! Next time we should all go to the Milk and Honey Cafe and the three of us can be princesses for a day! What do you say?”

Hajime didn't know what to say. She felt like her heart had gotten ripped out of her chest.

“... Hajime? Hello? Are you still there?”

“Hinako… I want you to listen to me very carefully. Stay away from that girl, okay? She's really dangerous… I don't know what kind of lies she told you, but she's not my friend.”

“What do you mean she's not your friend? She's so nice!”

“That's what you think. I'm serious about this, Hinako. Stay away from her. Aki is not my friend and she is not your friend either. So please…”

“Aki is not your friend. Ah… okay. I see.” Hinako sighed, then she suddenly perked up. “Oh hey, Natalia! Natalia!”

The line went dead as Hinako hung up the phone and presumably started talking to Natalia. Hajime slowly hung up the phone and then she screamed, breathing through her nose and out her mouth. She sounded like a tea kettle about to boil over, and that was exactly what she was when it came to matters dealing with Aki Yamato. Sure, Hajime had threatened Natalia, but if there was anyone that Hajime  _ really _ wanted to shatter into a trillion pieces, it was Aki.

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I intended to update every Tuesday and Friday but depending how I feel I might upload chapter 3 later... technically chapter 3 is chapter 2 since I split it in half. (the original chapter 2 was long af ;;)


	3. III

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Literally on the phone with my grandfather as I post this lol

III

_ June 15th. Two years ago. _

Normally Hajime was indifferent to her birthday, but this year things were a little different. For one thing, she had turned 18, so she was no longer a child. Hajime found that exciting; she was ready to make her mark on the world. 

On a more superficial note, this year Hajime's birthday and the last day of school before summer vacation fell on the same day. She took that as a good sign. She stood at the bus stop outside of the school, trying to wonder what she should do today. It wasn't until she heard Hinako calling her name that she got her idea.

“Hajime! I was looking for you all day! Happy birthday!” Hinako had ran over to her friend and threw herself at her, attracting the attention of the other students. Hajime didn't care though. The two were somewhat popular as a duo - the other students found it heartwarming that Hinako and Hajime were such good friends, despite Hinako being a second year and Hajime being a third year. At Asaka High School, friendships across grade levels were super uncommon.

It didn't help that Hajime and Hinako were like night and day. Hinako was really popular in her year, while Hajime was the type of person who kept to herself and had a few close friends in her year. Hinako was really easy to talk to, while Hajime's serious nature intimidated most of her classmates. Not that Hajime cared, she always believed that it was better to have a few close friends than a bunch of shallow ones.

“Well you found me.” Hajime said to the younger girl. “Although… you wished me happy birthday this morning when we woke up. Did you forget?”

“No. Of course not! But I'm saying it again! Because this time… I have something for you!” Hinako held up a small, gold and white gift bag. 

“Is that for me?”

“Yes! Don't tell anyone, but I snuck out to get this for you. It cost a month's worth of my allowance, so I hope you like it!”

“Let's see.” Hajime opened up the bag and took out a small velvet box. In the box was a rose gold necklace with an “H” on it. The “H” was encrusted with clear rhinestones, so that it sparkled in the afternoon sun.

“Wow … this is…”

“It's pretty, right?” Hinako smiled. “It's also meaningful! H for Hajime… and H from Hinako. Isn't that cute?”

“Yes. I love it. Thank you!” Hajime hugged her friend and then put the necklace on. She wasn't the type to wear jewelry but was willing to make an exception for this.

“Great! I'm happy to hear that! Now let's get out of here and do something…”

“Hinako! Hinako Kita!”

“Shit.” Hinako swore. Both of the girls had turned around to see that Hinako's homeroom teacher, Mizuki Kawashima, was calling out for her.

“I thought I asked you to come to the teacher's room at the end of the day.” Mizuki said to Hinako. 

“I forgot.” Hinako lied.

“You're such an airhead. Come on.” Mizuki then turned to Hajime, who was in her class last year. “Happy birthday, Hajime. You know, Hinako, you should really aspire to be like your friend here. She never cut class and always paid attention. She was such a good student… you're just hopeless.”

“I'm sorry.” Hinako apologized, sniffling and wiping her eyes. “I'm sorry I'm hopeless.”

Mizuki rolled her eyes. “Crying won't get you out of this one. Let's go.”

“Go ahead, Hinako. I'll wait here.” Hajime told her.

The two left Hajime alone, leaving her to stare up at the sky and make shapes out of clouds. She had made a few when a girl walked behind her. This girl wasn't wearing a school uniform, which lead Hajime to believe that she was either a sibling of a student or she went to a school that had already let out for summer vacation.

“Excuse me,” she said in a very polite tone of voice. “But are you Hajime Fujiwara?”

“Yes.” Hajime answered. “Why?”

The girl's face darkened and her tone became sinister. “What a nice necklace you have there. How much did it cost?”

“Um… I don't know. It was a gift from my friend.”

“Well that's too bad.” the girl linked her finger around Hajime's necklace, and then pulled hard on the chain, causing the necklace to come off.

“Hey! Give that back!”

“You'll get it back, once you give me back what belongs to me. I'm so glad you're 18 because now I can go after you.”

“What are you talking about?”

“Hmm… I could tell you now, but I don't want to ruin your birthday. So I'll wait. I hope you have a good day though, because this will be the last good birthday you have in a while.” 

The girl then sauntered off, spinning Hajime's necklace around her finger. Hajime thought about chasing her, but there was no point; the girl had disappeared into the backseat of a black Cadillac Escalade with tinted windows. Hajime felt helpless as the luxury vehicle pulled off. 

“Hey… do you know her?” One of Hajime's classmates, Karin Domyoji, had walked over, looking very concerned.

“No, but she took my necklace.” Hajime said. “Do you know her?”

“Not personally. I'm just surprised. I wonder what she's doing here… and riding in a Cadillac Escalade no less.”

“But who is she?”

“Oh her name is Aki Yamato… she graduated last year… my cousin was in her class for all three years and she said that she was seriously psycho.”

“Seriously?” Hajime laughed. “Should I be scared of her?”

“Yes… and stop laughing. This isn't a joke. My cousin said Aki would behave in a way that made it clear that she had nothing to lose… they'd  _ give  _ her the class representative position instead of holding an election because they were scared of what would happen if she lost. Um… what else did Hitomi say? Oh right, they would all call her 'sergeant’ behind her back and Aki confronted the girl who started it…”

“Well I would do the same thing.” Hajime said. “You can't talk shit about someone and expect to get away with it…”

“No Hajime. You don't understand. She found the girl who started it and burned her  _ in the face _ with a glass rod rod in the middle of science class.”

“No way!”

“Yes way! You can't make this shit up. I don't know what kind of business you have with Aki Yamato, but please… be careful! That girl isn't normal!”

At that point, Karin's bus had pulled up to the corner, and she ran after it, yelling for the driver to wait up. As for Hajime, she decided to take the information that Karin gave her with a grain of salt. If this Aki girl really  _ did  _ burn her classmate in the middle of class, she would've gotten expelled, right? Hajime shook her head, Karin had to be messing with her. 

Unfortunately, that wasn't the case.

xxxxx

Back in the present, Hajime found herself feeling calm enough to go buy the doll. It took her doing breathing exercises for ten minutes for Hajime to calm down, but she was ready. She began to make her way out of the phone booth.

Except there was one problem. As soon as Hajime opened up the door to leave, another girl stepped inside, backing Hajime into a corner. She was pale, with stringy black hair tied into pigtails, and wore a white face mask over her nose and mouth.

“Hajime Fujiwara.” she said, removing her face mask. “The boss requests to see you.”

“That's too bad. She can wait.” Hajime told her. “I'm busy, Akira.”

“You can either comply and go quietly or you can refuse and I'll have to make a scene.” Akira said. “I  _ really _ don't want to do that, and you don't want that either.”

“I understand and you're absolutely right. Where's the Escalade?” 

“Around the corner. Come on.”

“But wait. I need to get something important. Do you mind?”

“Of course not. But Aki will.”

“Screw her. I'll be at the Escalade in 5 minutes. Okay?”

“Five minutes.” Akira put her face mask back on. “You have five minutes. Don't take a second more or else you'll regret it.”

xxxxx

“Okay, where is she?” 

The two girls had walked into Aki's house, and were standing in the foyer. The first few times Hajime had been here, she wanted to walk around and explore, but by now the only thing that Hajime felt while in Aki's house was “get me out of here!”

“I'm surprised you want to see her.”

“I don't want to.” Hajime corrected. “I just want to get this over with.”

“What's in the bag?” Akira asked, pointing to the bag that Hajime was holding.

“Oh this?” Hajime took the doll out of the bag and handed it to Akira. “My friend is having a birthday party on Friday night, so I got her a present.”

“Wow! It's so cute. Where did you get this from? I'd like to buy one.”

“You can't…” Hajime said. “I got it from that antique store we were in front of… it was the only one left.”

“It's probably rare… and…” Akira hugged the doll. “Whoever your friend is, she'll be very happy.”

“That’s what I hope.”

“Aren't you a little too old to be playing with dolls?” a cutting voice asked. Aki had joined them in the foyer. Akira immediately bowed her head, but Hajime was different. She had no respect for this girl.

“Where were you?” Akira asked. Feeling embarrassed, she placed the doll on a table that was behind her and Hajime. 

“Just upstairs… cleaning my babies.”

“What do you want?” Hajime demanded. 

“You know what I want.” Aki smiled at Hajime. “I want you to tell me why you are once again unable to hold up your end of the deal. Where's my money? It's late.”

“Your money. Your money?” Hajime was incredulous. “I worked for that money, not you. How dare you…”

“How dare I what?” Aki spoke over her. “I thought I was being generous, asking you for 60% of your paycheck. That's what we agreed on… remember?”

“That's more than half. You leave me with the bare minimum… I can't live off that. Come on.”

“No. If it were up to me, I would take all of it and leave you with nothing.”

“That's not fair and you know it. In fact, everything about this deal is unfair! What you're doing is probably illegal too.”

“You know what else is unfair? The fact that your parents gave mine a fraudulent loan and scammed them. Then they skipped town, or died, whatever. You're the only member of the family left over, and my parents sacrificed themselves so I could live. We're the only two left, so you have to pay me back everything. I think that's fair, don't you?” 

There was an awkward, heavy silence as Hajime didn't know what to say. Everything that Aki had said was unfortunately true. When Hajime first found this out, she had tried kneeling and sincerely apologizing to Aki … who responded by pistol whipping her in the face. Why did she end up breaking Hajime's nose? Because Aki said that it felt like Hajime was mocking her. Mocking her! It was clear this was a sensitive subject, which was why Akira was the first person to speak.

“That's actually not fair at all.” she muttered under her breath. 

“What did you just say?” Aki demanded.

“Hajime wasn't born yet and you were an infant when this went down. I don't think it's right for you to…”

“Be quiet.” Aki hissed, and Akira immediately went back to bowing at 90 degrees. “Someone needs to take responsibility, and that person is Hajime. Unless of course, you want to be the one to pay me 15 billion yen?”

When Akira didn't say anything, Aki just laughed. “That's what I thought… so Hajime, pay up. Give me my 60%... my bank account is looking a little dry.” 

Hajime didn't move. She spent most of her money on the doll, which had been more expensive than expected. 

“Well…? Pay up.” Aki laughed yet again. “Don't tell me you don't have it.”

“Okay fine.” Hajime said nervously. “I won't tell you.”

“You're really something.” Aki walked over to Hajime and looped her hair around her finger. “What kind of person takes on more debt instead of paying it off? Or maybe… you constantly disrespect me because you look down on me, just like your criminal parents looked down on mine. Is that true?”

“It's not a matter of looking down on anyone.” Hajime told her. “It's just… my friend's birthday is coming up and I got her a gift. If you had friends, and I mean actual friends, not your ‘babies’, you'd get them birthday presents too… sergeant.”

As Akira started laughing, Hajime felt relatively confident. But all of that changed once she saw how Aki's face began to redden. Hajime's confidence faded as Aki pulled on her hair so hard, it brought her to her knees.

“Sergeant? Are you… are you mocking me? What do you know about my friends? Of course I have friends. You know nothing…” Aki then turned to Akira. “And as for you… stop laughing and go bring me Charlene.”

“Charlene?” Akira repeated, as serious as a heart attack. “Do you really want me to get Charlene?”

“Did I stutter?  _ Go. _ ”

“Y-yes ma'am!”

As Akira ran upstairs, Hajime slowly stood up, wondering if she should say anything. Aki was so livid that Hajime found it hard to look at her. She decided to stare at the ground. Maybe Hajime shouldn't have been too surprised, Akira did let it slip once that Aki  _ hated _ that nickname. 

“You wanna hear a secret? If you want to hurt Aki's feelings, call her Sergeant.” Akira had said, laughing. “Apparently Aki had a hard time over it in school. Don't tell her that I said this, but I think she's a weak bitch.”

Hajime was now regretting her cutting remark.

“I'm back.” Akira announced. Hajime looked up to see that Akira was holding a rifle. Her heart was in her throat as Aki took the weapon from her goon.

“Are you going to kill her?” Akira asked. 

“Maybe… do you have anything against execution style deaths?”

“I'm… I'm not…” Akira didn't know what to say. 

“Good.”

“Well don't!” Hajime spoke up. “I'm really sorry… I didn't mean to insult you. I'll do anything… just please spare my life!”

“Just please spare my life.” Aki repeated mockingly. “Do you have any idea how many times I've had to ask… no… beg for that? Do you have any idea how much I have suffered because of you? Or even my parents?”

Hajime shut her eyes as Aki aimed the rifle at her. There was nothing she could do, she thought as she began to cry. It was over. Hinako and Natalia would have to go on without her. Why did this have to happen?

With the click of the trigger, something sped right past Hajime. Whatever it was, didn't stop until there was a shatter of broken glass. The sound was deafening and Hajime's ears were ringing. It felt like her stomach was in her throat, and Hajime could barely stand. She fell to her knees, and Aki walked over to her. In the corner of her eyes, Hajime could see Akira holding “Charlene”. She was trying to remain serious, but she couldn't stop herself from shaking.

“Holy shit, I thought…” Akira began.

“What? Did you seriously think I would kill her…  _ before _ getting my money?”

“Ah… I… I see.”

“As for you…” Aki turned her attention back to Hajime. “You said you'd do anything?” Then she asked in a low voice. “ _ Anything _ ?”

“That's what I said, right?” Hajime asked. She didn't feel like herself; she felt less than human. She felt like a hollow puppet, bound by the strings of circumstance. And of course, Aki was the one calling the shots.

“Okay. But those were your words, not mine. I'll give you one more chance because I'm feeling nice, but if you defy me one more time … I'm going to borrow your coffee shop friend - the one who you care about oh so much.”

“Hinako?” Hajime asked. Her voice was shaky, as it felt like her soul left her body. “What are you thinking of doing to her, you freak?”

“She’s cute and has a nice personality… that's what I thought after I got done talking to her. So I got an idea... she'll make a good call girl… she'd be way better at it than you. That is… unless her secret comes out. Then she might actually end up dead.” Aki giggled. “Not that I care. Anything to make you suffer, Hajime.”

As Aki was going on and on about her plan for Hinako, Hajime wasn't actually paying attention. Instead, she was shook to the core, trying to imagine Hinako being forced into something she didn't want to do. All because of her… Hajime couldn't let that happen. How would Hinako survive doing those type of things? She was so childish and innocent… Hinako would probably go crazy after the first night. That kind of work would break her. Hajime had to do whatever she could to prevent this from happening… what kind of friend would she be if she didn't?

As Hajime was thinking this over, a light bulb went off in her head. Something that Aki said had just registered with her. 

“What secret?” Hajime cried out, interrupting Aki.

“What are you talking about?”

“You said that Hinako had a secret. What is it? Tell me. I want know.”

“You don't know?” Aki laughed. “So much for best friends. Anyway, you're asking too many questions. Maybe I'll tell you if you let me have her. Maybe I won't…”

“No… I can't allow you to do that. Stay away from Hinako! She has nothing to do with this… this is between me and you!” Hajime charged over to Aki, with the intention of slapping her. However Aki shoved her away before Hajime could even think of raising her hand.

“Then fucking act like it. You're such a thorn in my side.” 

“How do you think I feel about you?”

Aki ignored Hajime and turned to Akira. “Akira, go take Hajime back to her shitty apartment. And when you get there…? I want the dress that my new best friend Hinako got her. Such trash doesn't deserve nice things… don't you agree?”

“Yes ma'am!” Akira set Charlene down and grabbed the keys to the Escalade, running outside. Hajime wordlessly followed, stopping once she noticed the table that was behind her.

All of this time, Hajime had been wondering what Aki had shot at. She had assumed that Aki shot a window, or a mirror, but what Aki had actually shot was way worse.

Just like Hajime's heart, Hinako's doll was now in a billion pieces.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Random thoughts on this chapter:
> 
> Akira is one of the new idols. I like her design so out of the two revealed so far, I like her the best 
> 
> Yes, Aki really does nickname her guns lol (her gun in that one card is actually named Charlene.) Her Japanese fans call her 軍曹 (Sergeant) too 
> 
> Hajime's secret is out. What's next? Well... the rest of Hinako and Hajime's friends (Ayame and Tamami) will finally show up next chapter. Exciting, right? ^^


	4. IV

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes! Party time (literally and because it's such a good song)

IV

“I’d like to thank you two for showing up… I'm going to need all the help I can get…” Natalia said as she tied up a white balloon. Once it was tied up, she threw it across the empty event hall. Then she stared at the two girls that she was talking to - a short girl was laying on her back on the floor, blowing up a balloon, while another girl, one with her hair cut in a pixie cut, was sorting plastic flowers into small glass vases. These girls were Tamami Wakiyama and Saya Matsubara, respectively.

Natalia had expected for Tamami to show up, but she wasn't expecting Saya to show up. In fact, Natalia didn't even know Saya like that - Hinako had invited her to the party. Yet for some reason, Saya decided to help out. Natalia was wary at first, but she warmed up once she saw how nice Saya was. Also, Saya being there filled in the gap left by Ayame, who was nowhere to be found.

“So what are we doing with these balloons?” Saya asked. 

“We're going to just throw them around and stick them to the walls. Hinako said she wanted them to give off the appearance of clouds. Her theme for the party is 'castle in the sky’.” Natalia explained.

“That's very Hinako-like.” Saya mused. “Do you think she'll come in with a horse and carriage?”

“I expect nothing else from her. Knowing her, she'll be late to her own party.” Tamami tied her balloon and threw it towards the pile of completed balloons. “What if she doesn't show up?”

“That'd be awful.”

“Well, it's possible. Ayame and I were talking about this last night. Like… could you imagine?”

“Hinako is spacey but not that spacey.” Saya reminded them.

“Oh… Ayame said that she wouldn't show up because Hajime would steal her away and they'd ride off in the moonlight.”

Saya giggled nervously. “So they're like that?”

“No one knows for sure. But Ayame said…”

Natalia coughed loudly. “Where is she?” she demanded. “I thought you said she was going to help out. Stop spreading weird rumors and call your friend.”

Tamami smirked, seemingly staring off into the distance. “What if I told you that my phone died?”

“Then  _ I'll  _ do it.” Natalia stood up, with the intention of getting her phone off a nearby table. However, she didn't get any far.

“Where are you going?”

Natalia nearly jumped out of her skin as she noticed Ayame standing behind her.

“Ayame! What did I tell you about sneaking up on me like that? Jesus! You're going to give someone a heart attack one day. Stop doing that!”

“I was waiting for Tamami to say something. She was staring at me.” Ayame smiled at Saya. “And you are?”

“Hi. I'm Saya.”

“Hi Saya. I'm Ayame. I'm sure you heard a lot about me.”

“Yes…” Saya smiled. “I saw you on TV the other day… you were selling this…” she motioned to the gold tennis bracelet on her wrist and Ayame's green eyes got bigger. 

“Oh! I'm surprised that you got one. Those bracelets were selling out really fast. I think I heard I broke a record…”

“Ayame is  _ really _ popular!” Tamami interrupted. “She's one of the most popular hosts on HBS… despite her young age. Isn't that cool?”

“That's really cool.” Saya smiled. 

“Not really.” Natalia interrupted. “Need I remind you that the H in HBS stands for Hamaguchi. The only reason why Ayame is even on that channel is because it's her family's.”

“Ahh… I see.”

“Well,  _ Natalia _ , Ayame may be the daughter of the CEO, but that doesn't explain why everything she shows sells out like crazy. She just has the talent and charming personality.” Tamami said. “If you had one…”

“Tamami, do you even have a job?” Natalia asked. “I sell things too. Just not on TV.”

“I…” Tamami began.

“Acting as Ayame's groupie in the hopes that she'll get you a spot on her dad's channel doesn't count.” Natalia snapped.

“Oh!” Saya exclaimed. She had never seen Natalia snap like this before.

“Hey! Everyone needs to calm down for a second. Tamami does a great job as my personal assistant.” Tamami lit up at Ayame's words and Ayame smiled at her. Then she directed her attention to Saya. “I'm sorry for all of this. My  _ occupation _ is a sore spot among my friends.”

“It's fine… I'm sure that we'd all do the same if you were in your position.” Saya sighed, wondering if she'd actually do the same.

“See! I'm glad someone gets it!” Ayame handed Tamami a pack of balloons. “Blow these… I just got my nails done and I don't want my voice to give out. You know my career is dependent on my voice, right?”

“Right!” Tamami chriped. “You can't broadcast if you can't talk!”

“I wish Hajime was here.” Natalia sighed, shaking her head. “What’s the point of coming to help if you're just going to dump all the work on Tamami? You're ridiculous, Ayame.”

“You’re ridiculous, Ayame.” Ayame repeated, then she laughed derisively. “Nothing is as ridiculous as watching your Hajime cosplay. Stop it. Speak of which… is she coming?”

“Yes… but she's not going to help us set up.”

“Ah yes. The glass cutter.” Ayame appeared to be thinking. “You guys always say I'm the one with princess syndrome, but at least I'm here. Who knows where bad attitude Hajime is…?”

“Working. Her schedule is insane. You know this.” Natalia told her.

“That's what you think.” Tamami muttered. “Hajime is so mysterious, it's annoying.”

There was an awkward silence until Saya spoke up. “Ah… Hajime is the one who you mentioned earlier, isn't she?”

“Yes.” Natalia answered. “I grew up with her and Hinako. Tamami was in Hajime's class. Hinako, Ayame and I were in the same class. Hinako and Hajime are super close.”

“Seriously.” Ayame rolled her eyes. “Take it from someone who has been dealing with her for years… Saya, don't even waste your time befriending Hajime tonight. She only likes Hinako.”

“She  _ especially  _ hates Ayame.” Tamami added. “It started when Hinako introduced Hajime to us… Ayame was like 'you're a girl?’, and started laughing. It's an immature response, but Ayame was only 7 years old. So don't be hard on her, okay?” 

“Okay…” Saya nodded.

“So Hajime got mad over that. And  she dragged Hinako away.”

“Oh…”

“I don't get it.” Natalia admitted. Normally she'd be trying to stop this gossip fest, but she had never heard this story before.

“Hajime is a male name.” Tamami explained. “So… two weeks passed and Ayame apologized to Hajime. And Hajime told her that she didn't care and wasn't going to accept the apology.”

Ayame frowned. “Such a response hurt my pride. So I did something that I deeply regret to this day.”

“Um… what?” Saya and Natalia asked in unison.

“I told Tamami that she had lice… and Tamami may be my senior but she's really  _ really _ bold when it comes to doing things on my behalf… she told everyone that Hajime has lice.”

“Oh my God. Hajime was mad, wasn't she?” Natalia asked.

“What do you think?” Ayame huffed. “She dragged me out of my art class and started talking to me very nicely. She was so nice. Now that I think about it, that was the nicest she's ever spoken to me. So I told her the truth… that Tamami started the rumor. Then she turned on me, like a dog. Calling me a liar and she swung on me.”

Both Saya and Natalia gasped at this shocking turn of events.

“However… she didn't expect that I knew karate. My grandfather put me in lessons when I was younger. So I defended myself and we got sent to the principal's office… even though Hajime made a good case against me… she was the one who got suspended and I got off with nothing.”

“Ayame is so cool!” Tamami cheered.

“Honestly I think she's just bitter… she hates me because my family background is better than her's. My family owns the most watched home shopping channel in Japan, and her family… well, it's said her parents dropped her off at the orphanage as soon as she could leave the hospital. So of course she's the one with the biggest issue with me being on TV.” Ayame shrugged. “Saya, you should be fine.”

“Well she surely seems interesting…” Saya mused. She was secretly thinking to herself that Ayame was pretty interesting herself - she seemed to speak without thinking.

“Act like Natalia and Hinako. You'll be fine.” Tamami advised.

“About that…” Natalia sighed, staring down at her wrist. She was about to tell them about what Hajime did on the bus, but decided against it. However, she was going to say  _ something _ . “Saya, one thing you need to know about Hajime is that she talks in a certain way. Very cool and serious. But if she suddenly becomes sweet and cute, run for the hills. Trust me on this.”

“Oh?” Tamami slid closer to Natalia, who immediately scooted away. “What are you…”

“What are you guys doing here so early? The party starts in a few hours!”

Natalia sighed in relief as Hinako walked over, holding a box of string lights. 

“Hey Hinako! Happy birthday!” Natalia greeted, and the other girls followed suit. Hinako was glowing after they finished.

“Thank you so much! But what were you guys talking about? It seemed really intense…”

The atmosphere got awkward as no one really wanted to tell Hinako that they were talking about Hajime. Finally, Saya decided to speak up.

“We were talking about Hajime… and Ayame's history with her.” she answered, and Hinako's expression darkened.

“You guys…” 

“Did you include lice killing medication in the goodie bags?” Tamami asked, trying her hardest to hide her laughter. Ayame, Natalia and Saya all shot her a look that translated to,  _ shut the hell up _ .

“Be quiet.” Hinako snapped. “I thought I asked you two to never bring that up again.”

“You two?” Ayame repeated. “Why are you saying you two? Tamami may be a clout chaser, but am I Tamami?”

“I'm serious! I know how you two are. You say jump, Tamami asks how high…” 

“I don't force Tamami to do anything. That's her own free will.” Ayame told her.

“Whatever you say! But if you two end up ruining my party… I'll kick you both out.” Hinako pouted. “Please don't ruin my day. Be nice to Hajime. We have no idea what kind of stress she's under.”

“Right. We don't want to trigger her dark side.” Ayame stood up. “Come on Tamami. Get the lights from Hinako. We're going to be useful and hang them.”

“Got it!”

Without saying anything else, Tamami snatched the lights from Hinako and the two girls ran towards a corner of the hall. With them gone, Hinako turned to Natalia.

“Did you tell them about the bus incident?”

“No…” Natalia answered. “I have no intention to.”

“Good.” Hinako smiled. “I want everyone here to feel like a princess for a day, and that means no drama. Okay?”

“Okay…”

Hinako turned to Saya. “Let's set the vases on the tables. Come on.”

The two girls left Natalia alone, who went back to blowing up the balloons. Hinako seemed to be very confident that this party would go over well. Natalia could only hope for the same.

xxxxx

_ I wonder if this is the place,  _ Hajime thought as she got off the bus. Was it too late to around and go back home? Hajime wasn't in the mood for this - work had been especially tiring today. That might've had something to do with the fact that Hajime was still shook up over Aki nearly taking her life earlier that week.

Hajime hated thinking about what had happened, but she couldn't help herself. The events of Tuesday kept playing over and over in head, like a video on loop. Of course, Hajime wanted to tell someone, but she felt overwhelmed. What would Hajime even say? “I'm being stalked by a crazy bitch who has a vendetta against me for something I didn't even do”? That would open up the possibility of Hajime telling whoever that her parents were notorious scammers and she didn't want more people looking down on her. 

There was also the possibility that they would side with Aki… it was also even more realistic that Aki, as crazy as she was, would react by killing whoever it was Hajime decided to tell, or even worse, killing Hajime. 

There was nothing she could do besides pay off the debt.

As for this party… Hajime caught sight of herself in the reflection of shelter at the bus stop. She had no time to go home and make herself look pretty, but would that have helped? Ever since the incident, Hajime had been sleeping horribly. She was pale, with dark circles under her eyes. Her head was buzzing with a headache that Hajime recognized as fatigue induced. All she wanted to do was go home and sleep.

Hajime looked away from her reflection. She couldn't look anymore! She looked so pathetic, but nothing would be as pathetic as hearing Hinako spout crap about how everyone was royalty. Not Hajime, unless you counted her distinct lineage of being the offspring of two scammers.

“Spout crap?” Hajime repeated to herself. Why was she thinking about Hinako like that? She did nothing wrong. Hajime decided to bite the bullet and head into the event hall, ignoring her anxiety.

And what a mistake that was.

As soon as Hajime stepped in, it was as if the party stopped. There were maybe 20 other girls at the party, and they were all dressed in dresses or at the least… semi formal clothes. Hajime self consciously wiped the dust from her work clothes, which were anything but semi formal. When she looked back up, it seemed that the party had went back in full swing.

No one seemed to be talking about her. Good.

_ First things first, I need to find Hinako _ , Hajime thought as she walked around. Hajime didn't really know any of the other guests, so she was spared from having to greet anyone.  _ They probably think I'm hired help,  _ she thought.

“I thought you cut glass for a living, not play with dirt.”

It was just her luck; Hajime happened to walk in front of Tamami and Ayame. Tamami was the one who made the comment, while Ayame was staring down at her phone.

“Your insult didn't get Ayame's attention, so it must not be good.” Hajime told her.

“Why are you so dirty?” Tamami asked. “No wonder lice are so attracted to you.”

“What? Shut up.”

“Tamami, remember what Hinako said.” Ayame said, then she smiled at Hajime. “I'm so happy you made it. Long time no see. How have you been?”

Hajime rolled her eyes and walked away. Just looking at Ayame made her feel a certain way, a way that Hajime didn't have the energy to feel. She ended up going to the bathroom, where a short haired girl was putting lipstick on.

Hajime ignored the girl and walked over to the sink. She stared in the mirror, thinking. Maybe Tamami was right. Maybe she should've cleaned up before coming… even though going back home and then going to the party would've been out the way. But if Hajime did that she might've passed out from exhaustion.

She couldn't win.

“Ah… are you here for Hinako's birthday party?” the short haired girl asked. “Oh wait. Of course you are. You're the only person I don't know, so you must be Hajime. Hi Hajime. I'm Saya.”

“Hi Saya.” Hajime greeted. “How do you know Hinako? I've never seen you before.”

“She works at Mizuki Department Store.” Saya answered. “I shop there all the time.”

“I see. You must be rich then.”

Saya shrugged. “Not that much. My parents sell houses. They're moderately successful. I do my own thing. I blog…”

“Blog.” Hajime repeated. “It must be successful.”

“It's okay. I'm not celebrity level but I have  _ some  _ relevance.” Saya laughed. “I just write about things I'm interested in… and people are interested in that.”

“I see.” Hajime nodded like she cared. “But how did you know who I am?”

“I came earlier to help set up… I met Natalia, Tamami and Ayame… they're pretty interesting. Of course, I like Natalia the best.”

“Good answer. Ayame is the worst, isn't she?”

Saya shook her head. “Ayame just talks without thinking. She's also really blunt. I don't have a problem with her… it's Tamami I get a bad feeling from.”

“Don't think too much about Tamami.” Hajime told her. “She thinks she's something because she follows Ayame around… she's okay on her own. But whenever Ayame is around she will do anything for her approval. It's sickening. I can't stand that type of person.”

“Ah… I see.” Saya didn't know what to say. “Um… so… are you enjoying yourself?”

“I really don't want to be here.” Hajime admitted. “I don't know anyone and I'm really nervous… because I feel like an outsider. I feel like everyone here is looking down on me.”

“What? I'm sure that isn't true.”

“It is.” Hajime told her. “Everyone looks down on me. What would you know? Not more than me, that's for sure.”

Saya appeared to be taken aback. “Well... I am happy that you are here, and I don't look down on you. So let's do our best to have fun, okay?”

“Okay.” Hajime smiled, and Saya smiled back. 

“Wait. Wait here. I have an idea…”

xxxxx

Thirty minutes later, Hajime walked out of the bathroom, feeling slightly better. When Saya said she had an idea, Hajime had gotten nervous. How could she trust someone who she barely knew? Hajime felt like she was going to get set up, but that wasn't the case. Saya put a braid in Hajime's hair and then fashioned one of the decorative flowers into a barette. It was a nice gesture and Hajime found herself feeling a little better about herself.

As Saya was doing Hajime's hair, the two talked - Saya listened as Hajime talked about pottery, while Hajime listened to Saya talk about her blogging adventures. 

“It looks so nice. Thank you.” Hajime had said when Saya was done. “I'm really surprised.”

“Why?”

“Because your hair is so short…”

Saya shrugged. “I used to have really long hair, but I cut it off and donated it a while back. You have really pretty hair, Hajime. It's really healthy and you take good care of it.”

“I do? No way. You're joking.”

But that was in the safety of the bathroom. If anything, Hajime wanted to go back. However, she didn't come here to hide.

Hajime found Hinako standing in the center of the room, talking to two girls, a blonde and a brunette. 

“Isn't it pretty?” Hinako was saying, motioning towards the tiara on her head. “I found this in the store.”

“Yes. It fits you.” the blonde girl said, smiling. “But… I'm surprised that the Mizuki Department Store sells tiaras.”

“Don't be too surprised. We sell everything.” the brown haired girl said. “That’s what my mom intended.”

“Interesting… I should note that in my business plan.”

“Business plan…?” Hinako asked. “What are you talking about?”

Before either girl could answer, Hajime took this as a chance to speak up. “Hi Hinako. Happy birthday!”

Hinako's smile shrank as she noticed Hajime standing there, not wearing the dress she got her. “You made it. Um… are you wearing one of my decorative flowers in your hair?”

Hajime blushed. “Maybe… so who are your friends?”

The two girls exchanged a look. The blonde haired girl spoke first. “You know what? Hinako, we'll leave you to talk to her...”

“Yes… you're such a good event planner.” the brown haired girl agreed. “I had no idea that you hired a clown for this party.”

“Who are you calling a clown?” Hajime asked, but she didn't get an answer. The two girls had walked off.

“Wait!” Hinako cried out. “Seira! Tsukasa! Come back…”

Of course, neither girl came back.

“I put up with a lot for you.” Hajime told Hinako. “They're lucky this isn't my party.”

“Why are you dressed like that?” Hinako asked through her teeth. “What happened to the dress that I got you? Why aren't you wearing it?”

“I… I accidentally left it at home.” Hajime lied. “It looks really nice here. Good job.”

“I'm glad you like the decor.” Hinako reached over and snatched the flower out of Hajime's hair. “However… this doesn't belong up there.”

“Sorry.” Hajime apologized.

“I'm going to go find Seira and Tsukasa. You interrupted our conversation.” Hinako announced. “I'll see you later.”

Desperate to keep Hinako by her side, Hajime quickly scanned Hinako's outfit, looking for something to compliment her on. It wasn't hard to find - she was wearing a heart shaped pendant which glittered under the lights. There was a jewel set in the middle.

“I like your pendant. Where did you get it?”

“Oh this? This was a birthday present from Ayame.” Hinako smiled. “It’s beautiful, isn't it? And guess what?”

“What?”

“The diamond is real.” Hinako protectively placed her hand over it. “Ayame didn't have to do this, but she did. Isn't that so nice of her?”

“Eh…”

“Wait a second.” Hinako's eyes got bigger. “Where's my gift? You said you got me something. I'm really excited to see it.”

Hajime's heart began to hurt as she thought about the doll, blown up to pieces. One thing that she didn’t actually think about was what to tell Hinako, and now that the time was here… she was going to hope for the best.

Hajime sighed deeply. “Your present is my presence.”

“Excuse me? What? Who do you think you are? ‘Your present is my presence’ … have you lost your mind?”

“Why are you being like this?” Hajime did not hide her disbelief. “I can get you a gift later. Something’s come up, and…”

“Something like what?” Hinako challenged. She had narrowed her eyes and crossed her arms. Whatever Hajime was about to say better had been good! 

“Um…” Hajime started.

“No…” Hinako shook her head and grabbed Hajime by her wrist. “Let's not do this here. Let's take this outside.”

xxxxx

Unbeknownst to Hajime and Hinako, Tamami was lurking in the background. Because she was so short and generally inconspicuous, neither Hinako or Hajime noticed her. Feeling like something was going to happen, she ran over to Ayame and Natalia, who were dancing.

“Hey guys!” Tamami forced herself in between them, which of course, startled them.

“What are you doing?” Ayame demanded. “Don't you see we're doing something here?”

“Guys! This is important!” Tamami lowered her voice and made a ‘come closer’ motion with her hands. When both Ayame and Natalia were leaned in, she continued. “Hinako just dragged Hajime out. They're going to fight!”

“No way. You have to be joking.”

“I'm not joking. See, look.” Tamami pointed over to the door, where surely enough, Hajime and Hinako were exiting. “We should see what happens! Let's go!”

“Who's we?” Ayame asked. “You saw how I greeted Hajime earlier and she just ignored me. If you want to go out then go ahead. I'll be in here though.”

“Fine.” Tamami ran towards the door.

“Are you going to go too?” Ayame asked Natalia. 

“I should. Tamami plays too much and knowing her, she'll instigate it into something more. Sorry Ayame, we'll dance later.”

“Whatever.” Ayame took out her cell phone and walked back over to the table. Natalia, however, decided to head outside.

xxxxx

“What's gotten into you? Why are you acting like a spoiled brat?” 

Hajime and Hinako stood outside on the sidewalk, unaware of their surroundings. They both were in that mood where they were so mad, that only the other person existed. 

“Spoiled brat?” Hinako repeated. 

“Yes. A spoiled brat. What? You can’t wait a little longer for your gift?”

“Maybe I could… maybe I could if you didn’t lie. You lead me on at the table that day… and I fell for it. You’re like a closed book, shut off all the time and I can’t stand it! Why are you so secretive? What are you hiding?” Hinako paused, then she laughed. “Why am I even asking you this? You’re never truly honest with me any other time, so why should I expect for you to be honest now? What am I, an idiot?”

“You know what? You are!” Hajime shouted. “You are and you always have been! ‘I’m a princess’, ‘I’m going to wear fancy dresses’! You go on and on saying silly things like that and expect to be taken seriously. You always act like something you aren’t… you’re a faker. A fraud. You’re fake. You stood there and let Seira and Tsukasa disrespect me because you’d rather fit in with these rich girls who will  _ never  _ accept a poor orphan like you! You’re so delusional… wake up and join the rest of us in reality, Hinako!”

When Hajime was done, she had to take a deep breath. She was shaking! Believe it or not, she was not expecting to go off like that. However, the stress from dealing with Aki had hit her, and the words just kept coming. But on the other hand, Hajime had felt this way for years, so the words were meant to come out eventually. But not like this. Never like this.

Hinako’s face had reddened and her eyes had welled up with tears.  “I knew it. I knew it! That's why you never wear the necklace I got you. The necklace I saved money for…” 

“No... it's not what you think! I want to tell you but…”

“But what? You think I'm dumb? Stupid? An airhead? Is that what you think of me? How long have you been wanting to say what you said? Be honest for once… please…”

“For a while now.” Hajime admitted, going against her better judgement. Her regret increased tenfold once Hinako slapped her across the face.

“Then why would you pretend to be my friend if you look down on me? Why would you hang around me if you choose to mock me and my dream? What is the matter with you? Hajime, I really liked you…”

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it, I…”

“No, you meant it. I hate you!”

At that point, Natalia had seen enough. She ran up to the two, deciding to end this for real. Tamami stood in the back, watching everything like it was a movie.

“Both of you, stop it!” Natalia exclaimed. “Stop it! We’re trying to have a good time here, and…”

“And what? I ruined it?” Hajime cut her off. “I know you all hate me! I don’t need…”

“Hajime, do you hear yourself? No one ruined anything and we don't hate you.  _ I  _ don't hate you. I don’t know what happened, but what I do know is that you two need time away from each other.”

“I never want to see her again!” Hinako sobbed. “Hajime is the worst!”

“Seriously Hinako…” Natalia sighed, then she turned to Hajime. “Why don’t you go home? I think it would be better for everyone. We can talk this out when everyone has calmed down.”

_ I don't want to be here anyway _ , Hajime wanted to say, but she kept her mouth shut. The last thing she wanted to do was make things worse. For that reason, Hajime began to walk away, not saying anything at all. Friends? What friends? Hajime didn't need them, she was fine on her own!

Or that's what she kept telling herself - anything to lessen the pain of Hinako's hurt feelings. Maybe Hajime could've been nicer. Maybe Hajime should've lied. Maybe Hajime should've kept her mouth shut. But she didn't. Now where the hell was she supposed to go from here? 

Good question.


	5. V

_“We can talk this out when everyone has calmed down.”_

About a month had passed since Hinako's ill-fated birthday party, and despite Natalia's words, no one had talked anything out. Life went on as usual, and at first, Hajime was indifferent. She was happy, even, not having to be around Hinako and hear her mindless prattle.

But that didn't last long. About ten days after the fight, Hajime had started to miss Hinako. Why wouldn't she? Even though her emotions were running high that night, Hajime couldn't deny that Hinako was a big part of her life. Now that she went ghost, Hajime was really feeling Hinako's absence. The hole she left was so great that Hajime went from thinking, “I did nothing wrong”, to “I could've handled that better.”

By week four, Hajime was ready to apologize. But there was a slight problem, it wasn't like she could text Hinako. Without a phone, Hajime's options were limited - she could either go to Hinako's house or to her place of work. Was Hinako even scheduled to work today? When was Hinako last scheduled to work on Saturday? Hajime recalled that Hinako had been able to talk her managers into letting her off on weekends, but was that still in effect? There was only one way to find out.

xxxxx

Mizuki Department Store was 5 floors tall, and the building took up an entire block. Despite that, Hajime wasn't intimidated by the size. After staring at the directory for five minutes, Hajime remembered that Hinako worked in the south west corner of the 3rd floor. She made her way up there, her determination faltering as soon as she saw Hinako setting out samples with a serious expression on her face.

_Why does she look like that?,_ Hajime asked herself. Much to Hajime's anxiety, Hinako kept the serious expression on her face as Natalia came up from behind her and told a joke. The behavior was very unlike Hinako, which Hajime found worrying. Yet, she found herself walking up to the counter.

“Um… excuse me…” Hajime started.

“Oh my God, Hajime? What are you doing here?” Natalia asked. “It's very unlike you to come visit us at work.”

_Why is she acting like nothing happened at the party?_ , Hajime thought. She didn't show it though, and just smiled, “Well I decided to do something different.”

“Well what brings you here?”

“I…”

“Natalia, who are you talking to?” Hinako asked, interrupting Hajime. “I don't see anyone standing there. So what are you doing?”

“Hinako, don't be like that.” Hajime told her. “Seriously…”

“No. You don't be like that. What are you doing here? I know it's not because you want to buy something, because you never have money. So did you come here to harass me? If so, I'm going to call security to drag you out.”

“I’m sure there are better ways to handle this… why don't you listen to what Hajime has to say?” Natalia suggested. “Calling security over this is dumb.”

“You're right.” Hinako nodded, then she shot a lethal glare at Hajime. “I don't want to bother them with this nuisance. After all, they work so hard.”

“You're right.” Natalia said, smiling.

“I know. That's why I'm going to become security and drag Hajime out by her hair, with my own two hands.” Hinako hissed, throwing the samples down on the counter. She looked at Hajime expectantly, like she was expecting for Hajime to put up a fight. Natalia's smile had faded once she realized that Hinako wasn't messing around.

“That won't be necessary.” Hajime said slowly. “What time do you get off of work? Let's go to the Milk and Honey Cafe. We can talk this out and become princesses for the day. What do you say to that?”

“I think that would be a splendid…” Natalia started.

“Shut up, Natalia.” Hinako ordered. “Do you hear her? She's mocking me. Even after all that… she comes here, claiming to want to apologize… yet she's mocking me. Are you trying to get me set up? As for you…”

Hajime felt nervous as Hinako looked her up and down. “You can go somewhere. Even if I wanted to be mocked by you this afternoon, I already have plans with someone at the Milk and Honey Cafe. And no, you cannot come.”

“Who is it? Ayame? Tamami?”

Hinako looked down at her watch. “You're so annoying. Natalia, I'll be back.”

As soon as Hinako was out of earshot, Hajime turned her attention to Natalia. “What time does Hinako get off?”

“What time is it now?” Natalia discreetly looked at her cellphone. “It's 2:55. She gets off at 3.”

“Well I came here at the best time then.” Hajime laughed nervously.

“Are you sure that you're handling this in the best way?” Natalia questioned. “Hinako doesn't seem open for forgiveness right now…”

“Well I'll make her open. You don't understand. I need her to forgive me.”

“You can't force forgiveness.” Natalia reminded her. “I think you should just let Hinako get over it. She was the one wronged…”

“It's been a month.”

“So? She thinks you hate her. Like really hate her. I know you weren't around for the immediate aftermath, but I was. She cried… a lot. Like the sound of her sobbing is forever imprinted in my brain. Bad stuff…”

“Hinako is really sensitive. I'm sure she's over it now…”

“No. Look at how she's behaving. Can't you see that you really hurt her feelings? And she doesn't even know about what you told me on the bus. Hajime. Trust me on this. Don't try to force forgiveness… you'll really make things worse.”

“What if…” Hajime paused. She didn't want to think about this outcome, but it was very real. “What if she never wants to be my friend again? Then what?”

“Well… you should've thought about that before saying what you said…” Natalia admitted. “Because if I were Hinako… I'd never want to talk to you again for the foreseeable future.”

“Of course. I see whose side you're on.”

“This isn't about sides. In fact, if you ask me, I think you’re both wrong. Hinako didn't need to throw a fit like that. You didn't have to call her names. Hinako is really immature, and you're really bad at positive communication. Honestly, the only side I'm on is the 'let's all get along’ one. But you can think what you want… and I know you will. You're very stubborn.”

Before Hajime could debate Natalia on that, Hinako reappeared, this time with her purse and jacket.

“You really don't get it, do you?” Hinako asked. “What are you still doing here?”

Hajime shook her head and then smiled. Stubborn? She was going to show Natalia just how stubborn she was! “You know what? You have fun with your friend, okay? I'll talk to you later.”

Hinako's rock hard expression softened. “Thank you. Aki and I will have a lot of fun.”

“Wait.”

However, Hinako did not wait. Instead, she smiled at Hajime, and made her way towards the employee exit, knowing that Hajime wouldn't follow her back there.

Back at the counter, Hajime felt physically weak, like she couldn't stand. “No way… no way...” she said.

“What's the problem?” Natalia asked. “Who's Aki?”

“I can't tell you that.” Hajime answered. “I can't tell you that! I'll see you later.”

“Can you at least tell me what's going on?” Natalia asked, but she didn't get an answer. Hajime had run away, presumably to find Hinako.

xxxxx

As Hinako made her way to the cafe, she kept looking over her shoulder. She couldn't help it; even though Hinako felt like she had been aggressive enough, she couldn't shake the feeling that Hajime was following her. Maybe Hinako made a mistake in bringing up Aki… Hinako wasn't really going to hang out with her, or anyone actually. She didn't even know Aki like that - they had only talked once. The only reason why Hinako lied was to make Hajime jealous. Hopefully, it worked. Knowing Hajime's track record, it definitely worked. Maybe she had made a mistake...

_Why can't she leave me alone?_ Hinako asked herself. _She's so weird, saying hurtful things and ruining my party… no, my life, but she still wants to be friends? Even though she looks down on me and my dreams? Why can't she let me live? Why can't she be normal?_

“Hinako!”

Speak of the devil. Hajime was running behind her on the sidewalk. Hinako would've started running, but physical stamina wasn't her strong suit. She decided to stay put. The last thing Hinako wanted was for Hajime to follow her to the cafe and see that she was lying.

“Hinako… please listen to what I have to say...” Much to Hinako's surprise, Hajime got on her knees, despite them being on a city sidewalk.

“What are you doing?”

“I know you're upset by what I said… and rightfully so… but you _cannot_ go hang out with Aki! Please… please listen to me. It doesn't feel like it, but even though we are having problems right now, I still care about you.”

“Why waste your time caring about a foolish airhead like myself?” Hinako asked.

“You aren't… you're sweet and cute and charming! Three things I'm not and I don't want Aki to take advantage of that… I shouldn't have said those things to you during your party… I shouldn't have said those things at all. I'm really sorry! Really, truly, from the bottom of my heart… I was in a really bad mood that day… I was stressed. I feel better now, so please…”

“You seem sincere.” Hinako observed, noticing how Hajime had her hands in prayer position and how her eyes were shut tightly, as if she were afraid to look at Hinako. On top of that, it seemed that she was so nervous, that Hajime was shaking. Hinako couldn't bear to see this. “Okay. I accept your apology.”

“You do…?” Hajime slowly opened her eyes. “We're friends again?”

“Yes.” Hinako answered. “Best friends…”

“Thank God.” Hajime stood up and hugged Hinako tightly, unaware that Hinako was rolling her eyes. “I had no idea what I'd do if you would've said no. Just... please promise me that you'll cut all contact with Aki immediately.”

“It's a deal.” Hinako said, stroking Hajime's hair. Then she gazed deep into Hajime's eyes. “So I guess this means I can't hang out with her today. I should ghost her, shouldn't I?”

“Oh yes… that would be good. So what are you going to do instead?”

Hinako appeared to be thinking. “You owe me a birthday present. So… let's go to a different cafe. Is that fine?”

“That's more than fine!” Hajime smiled at Hinako, her face rosy. “I'm so happy… you had no idea how much I missed you… you'll always be my best friend, Hinako. Always!”

xxxxx

If anyone would've asked Hinako and Hajime about their first outing since making up, they would've been surprised to know that they would describe it in different ways. Hajime would've happily told them about all the fun they had, while Hinako would just look to the ground and mutter under her breath, “I felt like I was being held hostage.”

That was the truth. On the surface, it looked like Hajime and Hinako never gotten into that fight, but on Hinako's end, she was deeply disturbed by how Hajime acted like nothing happened. In fact, Hajime seemed to be not acting like herself - she was very touchy feely with how she kept hugging Hinako, who felt like she was being gaslighted. This would continue into the foreseeable future, and Hinako was not looking forward to that. So she had to take matters into her own hands; she had to do something.

As soon as Hinako and Hajime went their separate ways, Hinako ran back to her apartment, formulating a plan in her head. She didn't put it into place immediately, as she had to get in the right mental state to pull this off. It took about 90 minutes for Hinako to become confident in this, but when she did, she was ready.

_I know I'm overstepping my boundaries with this plan, but Hajime needs to know what it feels like. She's a horrible person. I don't care if I stoop to her level, she had this coming. Best friends? What does Hajime know about that?_ Hinako moved her eyes over to a letter that hung up on the wall. It was dated from the previous academic year, and from Toho Design School. The letter was congratulating Hinako on her acceptance, it was something she was very proud of. Next to it hung the diamond pendant that Ayame got her. Hinako found herself getting lost in the cut of the diamond, until she remembered what she was supposed to be doing.

There was a 24 hour convenience store right across the street from Hinako's apartment. She ran over, and bought a phone book.

“I thought everything was online these days.” the clerk said.

“I don't have internet at my apartment.” Hinako informed her with a smile. “So I'm fortunate for this.”

And Hinako _was_ fortunate. She was laying on her bed, flipping through the phone book, going to the very end. While Hinako wasn't smart enough to remember the Japanese alphabetic order, she did remember that “Ya” was towards the end.

“Found it!” Hinako cheered. She immediately dialed the number that she was looking for and let the phone ring.

“Hello?” A girl asked on the other end. Her voice sounded young and Hinako could hear the sound of a video game in the background.

“Um… is this Aki?” Hinako asked. Whoever this girl was, she sounded way different from the girl she met in the cafe that day. Maybe there was more than Aki Yamato running around.

“No. But she can't come to the phone right now. What do you want? You were interrupting my Instagram Live.”

“I…”

“Give me that!” Hinako felt relieved as she heard Aki in the background.

“Hey! Are you trying to take my ear off?”

“No, but I should! I thought I told you not to stream from my phone anymore!”

“Your phone camera is better than mine!”

“Then buy your own! Akira, get out of here!” When Akira was gone, Aki turned her attention back to the phone call. “I'm sorry about that. So… who is this and what do you want?”

“Hi…” Hinako said shyly. “I'm Hinako.”

“Who?”

“Um… I'm Hajime's friend. We met at the cafe that day. Remember?”

“Oh! You. What do you want? Make it quick. I have somewhere to go.”

Hinako gazed at the clock, it was almost 11 pm. Where exactly could Aki be going at this time? Hinako decided to mind her business and get her request out. “I want to meet you. I want to meet with you and discuss Hajime. Her birthday is coming up and I want to get her a surprise. You two seem to know each other, so I think you can help me out. Is that okay?”

Aki laughed. “Sure. Hajime is one of my best friends. We can meet tomorrow. Where?”

“That cafe we met at before. Star Coffee Bar. Let's go at 2 pm.”

“Fourteen hundred. Okay. I'll write it down. See you then. Bye!”

Aki ended the phone call and Hinako, relieved that this didn't blow up in her face, laid back down and sighed. So she was meeting Aki tomorrow. Phase one of the plan was complete, which Hinako felt good about. However, there was something that she was confused about. What exactly did fourteen hundred mean?

xxxxx

_Where is she? Did she fool me?_

Just as Hinako said, she was at the Star Cafe Bar, and she had been there for about twenty minutes, waiting for Aki to show up. It was almost two thirty, and she was nowhere to be found. Hinako had foolishly decided to order black coffee and drink it straight up, with no sugar or cream added. As a result, she was super jittery and couldn't sit still. It made her usual time passing activity of people watching and daydreaming impossible.

Hinako had her head down on the table, tapping her pointer finger and concentrating on that. She kept at it until someone called her name.

“I'm sorry for the wait.” Aki sat down at the table.

“It’s fine! I'm just glad you're here.” Hinako sat up and smiled her charming smile. Much to her chagrin, Aki did not return the smile or seem moved.

“You said you wanted to get Hajime a birthday present, right?”

“Right. So please help me…”

“Well I think you should be straight with me. It's May. Hajime's birthday is June 15th. You're her best friend, right? Shouldn't you know this? I think you want something else from me. Be honest or else I'm leaving.”

Hinako felt like she had gotten punched in the jaw. Maybe she should've tried a different approach, but now, since Aki was already here, she was going to be honest. She ignored the influence of the caffeine and tried to act serious.

“I see why Hajime is so afraid of you.” Hinako started. “But there has to be a deeper reason. A deeper reason such as you having something on Hajime… like a secret of sorts.”

“Oh?”

“Yes. You definitely do know her secret. So please share it with me.”

“Why?” Aki asked. She was really confused by this turn in events - whenever Hajime spoke of Hinako, she always put her on a pedestal, saying that she was her best friend. Aki had saw how Hinako and Hajime were behaving in the cafe that day, from Hinako getting Hajime the dress to Hajime being so moved that she just _had_ to get her friend a gift. Aki found Hinako's 180 to be very bizarre.

“Why?” Hinako repeated. “Because Hajime doesn't understand that I don't want her to be my friend anymore. Even though I told her multiple times, she just ignores me. She doesn't take me seriously… so I'm going to force her to.”

“Hm… interesting. Does this have anything to do with the birthday gift she got you?”

“What gift?” Hinako laughed dryly. “There was no gift. How did you know?”

“Because Hajime told me that she wasn't going to get you a gift…” Aki smiled. “She said she thought about getting you a doll but decided against it… because she thinks you need to grow up.”

“Hajime…” Hinako could feel herself getting angry. “She's mocking me. That's all she is good for. Aki… please tell me what you know about Hajime. Please tell me her secret.”

“Okay… fine. I don't normally talk about my family history because it's pitiful, but it's relevant as to why I hate your friend.” Aki started. “My parents had a dream but they needed money for that dream. Naturally, they decided to get a loan. My parents were not very smart with their money… so they were unable to get money from the bank. They gave up on their dream, until they were approached by someone…”

“Who?”

“The parents of your friend - Takeshi and Sumi Fujiwara. I said my parents were not smart with their money… no, they weren't smart at all. The Fujiwaras scammed them out of 15 billion yen.”

“Fifteen… billion…” Hinako could barely fathom such a number. What she did know was that was a lot of money.

“I didn't figure it out until much later. We moved around a lot, but it was because my parents were trying to get away from the collectors… but these collectors weren't affiliated with a bank. No… the people who Hajime's parents scammed had mob ties.”

“What? Oh my God.”

“So… we were hiding out one day and I guess my dad had enough of it and…” Aki paused to wipe her eyes. “He jumped from our apartment building. I was 12. That was of course, front page news so at the funeral, the borrowers were able to find us. They came into the columbarium as we were setting down the urn and they demanded we paid up. But we couldn't. So the leader… pointed at me and was like… 'I want to buy her’...

“I wanted to go. I wanted to help my parents. I didn't want my mom to end up like my dad. But my mom was smarter. She decided to go into my place… I saw her do a lot of things that a kid shouldn't have to see her mother go through. Things that made me hate whoever scammed my parents. Things that I will probably never be able to forget. It was such a bad period in my life… I thought I wouldn't graduate from high school. I'm surprised I did. It wasn't until I became of age that things got worse.”

“How worse?” Hinako asked. She was honestly scared to hear the answer.

“My mom wanted us to run away because she knew I was older and smarter than I was before. Even though she was broken on the inside, she still knew that. We were going to leave on my 18th birthday… but it didn't happen. The leader… the leader heard about it and decided to surprise me in the worst way possible… he came into our room and killed my mom right in front of me. I have to relive that every year, because that was my birthday. I had to take over my mom's duties for a year. Then I was let go. 'We need to let Aki live a normal life, she's suffered enough’, was what they said.”

“What do you mean by duties? What kind of things did you do?”

“I don't want to talk about that with you. Such things made me feel less than human, and I still feel that way sometimes.” Aki admitted.

“Ah… holy shit. Hajime's parents were responsible for all of that? But where was Hajime? She grew up in an orphanage with me. That's how I met her…”

“Yes she did. Her parents must've decided they didn't want her so they dropped her off as soon as she was born. Then they both disappeared off the face of the Earth. Finding them was impossible, so I decided to go after their daughter. I found her when she was 16, and she had such a cocky energy to her… I waited two years and then told her everything.”

“How did Hajime take it?”

“‘It’s not my problem’,” Aki repeated, lying her ass off. The truth, that Hajime started crying and begging for forgiveness, did not fit the narrative that Aki was going for, so she was going to leave that out. “I really don't know how you can tell someone that and then they just shrug you off. She mocks me from time to time too.”

“That sounds like Hajime.” Hinako shivered. “How can someone with such dirty blood be so… ugh… how can she be like that? She looks down on people when she's lower than dirt herself.”

“You're right…” Aki said, thinking to herself. _It's ironic that she's being like this when she has no idea where she came from. If anything she's lower than Hajime but I'll keep that to myself for now._

“Thank you for telling me this, Aki. I'm really sorry to hear that her family put you through this, and I'm sorry that Hajime is giving you such a hard time.”

“Your words mean a lot to me. So what are you going to do now?”

Hinako smiled. “I'm going to expose her on national television.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> with friends like these...


	6. VI

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the messiness JUMPED out

VI

“No. Absolutely not.”

“But Ayame…”

A few days after learning the truth about Hajime's background, Hinako was ready to strike. Her plan was to expose Hajime on Ayame's channel, but Ayame was not cooperating. Hinako and Ayame stood in Ayame's dressing room at the broadcast station, as Tamami stood on the outside, her ear pressed up against the door. 

“But what?” Ayame challenged. “Don't you think that sounds ridiculously fake? The whole thing sounds like it was stolen from a movie.”

“It wasn't. The feelings Aki had as she was talking about this were real.” Hinako told her. “I don't think she would lie about this. What does she get from lying about such things?”

“The same thing you would get from going on my show and talking about this. Like first of all, I'm not a newscaster or a talk show host. I sell things. People watch my show to buy things… not to be dragged into interactive fanfiction.”

“It's not fanfiction.” Hinako insisted. “I'm only warning consumers about scammers and what they can do…”

“Provided that this Aki girl is telling you the entire truth, that is an extreme example… a very extreme example. Also… don't pretend that you're doing this because you care about warning consumers.” Ayame laughed. “That's horseshit! You're doing this because you feel like Hajime ruined your birthday party and you want to hurt her. Isn't this an overreaction? Grow up, Hinako. Seriously!”

“Why are you being like this?” Hinako pouted. “I thought you of all people would be supportive, since you hate Hajime.”

“I don't hate Hajime.” Ayame clarified. “Our personalities clash and she is holding a grudge against me for something that Tamami did, but I don't hate Hajime. I've never hated Hajime, even though she hates me. I have to be the bigger person here… and I don't want our relationship to get any worse, so...”

Hinako, annoyed by Ayame's sudden choice to take the high road, wasn't going to let this stop her. “Don't you think it's weird how Hajime ignores Tamami and only comes after you for this lice thing?”

Ayame laughed. “You know what? Get out of here. Of course I think it's weird, but nothing is as weird as this. You're really trying to turn me against Hajime, but it's not working. Get out. Hajime is such a good friend to you, and you're doing this because she didn't get you a present? How childish.”

“How childish.” Hinako said mockingly. “You don't understand. Hajime  _ seems _ like she's a good friend, but you don't…”

“I don't care, Hinako.” Ayame stared disinterestedly under her fingernails. “I thought I asked you to leave. What are you still doing here?”

Hinako rolled her eyes, but she left the dressing room. She sighed deeply, wondering where to go from here. Ayame was supposed to agree with her, damn it! But since she didn't, she was back to square one. 

Or so she thought.

“Psst. Hey. Hey. Hinako.”

Hinako looked around to see that Tamami was standing on the other side of the hallway, her eyes sparkling with a mischievous glint. 

“Tamami?”

“Yes, it is I.” Tamami grinned. “I couldn't help but to overhear you and Ayame's conversation, and…”

“She's being so unfair! Don't you agree?”

“Of course. I think that you have the right idea, Hajime needs to be taken down several levels. But on the other hand, Ayame is right - she isn't a newscaster or a talk show host. She doesn't want to jeopardize her career by going off script. I understand where she's coming from.”

“But Hajime…”

“I have an idea. It's not as grandiose as exposing Hajime on national television, but it'll still get her all the same.”

“And what's your idea?”

“Let's tell her boss. I overheard everything and it sounded like her family had mob ties. Surely the artist she works for wouldn't be here for that. Would you?”

“You're right. Let's go on Saturday.”

“Okay.” Tamami suddenly appeared to be thinking. “Although… I am curious about something.”

“What?”

“What did you mean when you said that Hajime wasn't really a good friend to you?”

Hinako glanced at Tamami, who was practically foaming at the mouth. Telling Tamami such information was like sticking a fork into a toaster, but Hinako felt like this would be the best option - after all, Ayame  _ did _ just kick Hinako out.

“Okay… fine.” Hinako cleared her throat. “Listen carefully, because I'm only going to say this once…”

xxxxx

_ Three years ago… _

“Hinako Kita.”

School had always been so-so for Hinako, who would spend her time doing everything but school work. Because of her last name, Hinako usually ended up in the window seat, which was good for her and bad for her grades. The teachers were well aware of this, and among them, Hinako had a reputation of being the 'hopeless girl from class 1-3’. She ranked last in her class and in the bottom 10% of her entire year. The teachers realized that nothing would change no matter where she sat, so she was allowed to keep her seat. Add the fact that Hinako didn't have parents, so many of the conservative teachers thought that she would forever be a lost cause. They let her get away with anything… until they felt like using her as a punching bag. 

And boy, did Hinako feel like a punching bag some days. She may had been spacy, but she wasn't stupid - Hinako learned that certain teachers would go easier on her if she started crying. Actually, a lot of people did - she remembered when Hajime yelled at her because she placed a Barbie doll into one of Hajime's clay pots.

“She's not meant to go there! Are you dumb?” Hajime had told her, throwing the doll at Hinako. Her tone had changed as soon as Hinako had started crying - the first time, it wasn't intentional, the then nine year old had been having a bad day because she found herself missing her parents.

Hinako's more rebellious classmates worshipped her for 'sticking it to the man’ in the age of competitive academics, but Hinako didn't think of it like that. Instead, she just found it  _ too  _ easy to space out and  _ too  _ hard to focus on something. Unless it was sewing. One of the few things that kept Hinako's attention was sewing.

“Hinako!”

Hinako, who had been staring out of the window, had her daydream broken up by her history teacher, Toko Hattori. She was waving her hands in front of the younger girl's face, clearly trying to get her attention.

“What am I going to do with you?” she asked once Hinako was staring at her. “I've been calling your name for five minutes. Here is your history test.”

The teacher handed a paper to Hinako, who's throat tightened once she saw the number ‘12’ printed in red marker at the top. A twelve! Hinako felt like like she broke a personal record; normally she scored in the 30-40 range. This was bad!

“Let's talk after class.” 

The rest of the period went by fast, as it was the last class of the day. Once the final bell rang, Hinako decided to just go to the teacher's office. Along with being known as the “hopeless daydreamer”, Hinako was also known for skipping. She skipped class sometimes, but mostly skipped appointments at the teacher's room. Why would Hinako look forward to getting lectured?

In the teacher's room, Hinako braced herself for a lecture, but surprisingly, it never happened.

“Hinako, I'm worried about you.” Toko started. “I've been teaching you all year and even though I try to engage you in the class, your grades are getting lower and lower.”

“I'm dumb and won't amount to anything.” Hinako told her straight up. “So give up on me.”

“You are not and I'm not going to give up on you.” Toko shook her head. “I know you come from a difficult background… you live in the Sacred Heart orphanage, correct?”

“Since I was eight.” Hinako told her. “My house burned down… it was so big… like a castle! I had a lot of fancy dresses and pretty dolls too. But best of all, my family…”

“And you lost all of that. I understand how hard that must be, even after all these years.” Toko sighed. “I really like you Hinako, so I'm not going to let you slip through the cracks.”

“But my grades are so bad…”

“They are. I'm not going to deny that. However, I've been talking to the other teachers and we decided to help you.”

“Help…?”

“Yes. If you join a club and be active in it, we'll forgive some of your bad grades. You'll end up passing.” Toko explained. “I look at you and realize that you're not the academic type. Luckily, there's more paths in life besides higher education.”

“Passing…” Hinako repeated, “Okay! I'll do it! Tomorrow morning, I'll tell you which club I want to join. Wait… we have a sewing club, right?”

“Yes. The fashion club makes their own clothes. I've seen your dress doodles on your assignments. I think you'll do well there. Do you want to join that club?”

“Of course!” Hinako exclaimed. “When do they meet?”

“Every Wednesday after school. You can start next week. I'll let them know you're joining.”

“I'm so excited!” Hinako exclaimed. Not only was she excited to try something new, but she was also very excited to tell Hajime about this!

xxxxx

For the rest of the day, Hinako was buzzing with excitement. She was going to join the fashion club! She was going to save her grades! School was no longer going to be completely miserable! 

Even though those thoughts kept running through her head, Hinako didn't actually tell Hajime about her good news until later that night. Hajime and Hinako had shared a room, and had been ever since Hinako came to the orphanage. Hinako figured that telling Hajime before bedtime would be good.

“Hey… Hajime.” Hinako called out. 

Hajime, who was laying on her bed and reading a book, acknowledged Hinako by putting the book down and staring at her. Hinako jumped out of her bed and ran over to Hajime, getting in the bed with her.

“What are you doing?” Hajime asked.

“I need to tell you something very exciting.”

“Yeah?”

“So I got my history test back and I got a 12…”

“You got a WHAT?” Hajime pushed Hinako out of the bed, who fell onto the ground with a loud thud.

“A 12…” Hinako repeated weakly. She felt even weaker when she saw how Hajime was glaring at her. Her friend was literally looking down on her!

“But don't worry. Hattori-sensei called me out and we talked.” Hinako continued. “There will be a happy ending to this. She said if I join a club, all my teachers will excuse my failing grades and I'll be able to pass!”

“You're  _ soooo _ lucky.” Hajime's voice was dripping with sarcasm. “I've never had such an offer extended to me.”

“Because you don't need it. You're really smart. Like you only have to read things once and you remember it! I'm not like that. I struggle…”

“As you always do. So what club are you joining?” 

“Sewing … fashion club.” Hinako said as she stared at the ground. There was a block forming in her throat; she felt like she was getting interrogated.

“Fashion club. All the snobs are in that club. Do you really think you'll fit in with such superficial people?” 

“Um… I don't know. But what I do know is that it's not very nice to judge people you barely know… you do that a lot, Hajime.”

“Because I know more than you'll ever forget.” Hajime told her. “So you're going to let Hattori-sensei take pity on you like that? You're signing up to be the fashion club's charity case.”

“No…”

“You have no pride, Hinako. It's like you like being coddled… we all baby you here because you're the youngest but do you expect to be babied your entire life? Now that I think about it, can you even sew?”

Hinako opened her mouth, to get ready to tell Hajime that her mother actually did teach her how to sew, but Hajime spoke first.

“Turn the lights off. I want to go to sleep.”

“Maybe you should try joining a club too?” Hinako suggested as she made her way to the light switch. “We have a pottery club. Why not join that?”

Hajime answered Hinako by placing her pillow over her head, leaving Hinako no choice but to turn the lights out. Hinako wasn't tired, so she laid in the darkness and let her mind wander - that's what she normally did when she couldn't sleep. This would go on for hours, or whenever Hinako eventually dozed off.

“Hey.”

Hajime's voice cut through the darkness like a hot knife through butter. Hinako clutched her pillow, because to her, it sounded like Hajime was standing directly above her.

“What is it?”

“I hope you don't think I was coming down on you too hard… I don't really care if you join the club or not. In fact, I think it'll be good for you.”

“But you were saying…”

“I was only coming from a place of love.” Hajime said. “We need to look out for each other, especially since we don't have families. No one cares about you like I do.”

“Well thanks for the warning, I guess. But I'll be fine. I can handle it. You believe in me, right?”

“Right…” Hajime sighed dismissively. “Whatever you say.”

“Hajime, you should join the pottery club.” Hinako suggested yet again. “This way we can have our own clubs.”

“Our own.” Hajime repeated. “You mean like… separate?”

“Yeah! Don't you think that would be fun? We can share stories about them every night too. What do you say?”

Just like as she did before, Hajime answered Hinako by ignoring her. However, Hinako didn't pay it any mind.

At least until she remembered this exchange a few years later.

xxxxx

“So did you end up joining the club?” Tamami asked. The two girls were still standing outside of Ayame's dressing room, where Hinako had finished telling her story.

“For a short while… yes.” Hinako answered. “It was fun and I liked it a lot. However… Hajime started treating me differently.”

“What do you mean?”

“She wasn't very supportive, and would passive aggressively tear down my designs… saying things like ‘I didn't think you were that talented’, or 'your dress is so unique, not many people would look good in it’. Things like that. She'd try to bribe me away from my sewing too…”

“Bribe?” Tamami repeated, then she laughed. “With what? Monopoly money?”

“No… she said she'd take me to get cheesecake, because she knows that's my favorite. Usually, she'll protest it…”

“Because Hajime hates cheesecake...” Tamami realized. 

“See, you get it. Anyway, occasionally, some of my fabrics would go missing. I found out that Hajime would move them…”

“Ah… I see. What did your fellow club members think of her?”

“I became good friends with some people in the club. We'd hang out a lot and if I mentioned them Hajime would get really cold… she'd ask if they really liked me and when I didn't answer she'd be like 'I told you so…’, assuming the worst. That's what she wanted.”

“Weird…” Tamami shivered. “Now that I think about it, she's always been weirdly possessive of you.”

“She would always say they were looking down on me, but I thought we all got along fine. I didn't think much of it until I quit the club in my second year. Hajime got really nice after that… when she graduated, I joined the club again, it felt so much better… it felt so much better without thinking about Hajime being Hajime. But then.” Hinako sighed deeply. “My life would be better without her.”

“Huh?! Tell me more!” Tamami's eyes sparkled with excitement. She had grabbed onto Hinako's arm, and it took everything in Hinako not to push the smaller girl off.

“I'm going to tell you something… no one knows about this and I want it to stay that way. So promise me that you keep it secret?”

Tamami nodded eagerly. “Of course, of course! I promise not to tell anyone, not even my diary!”

“Okay… before joining the fashion club, I was lost… I didn't realize how much I loved drawing and making outfits… so I decided that I wanted to go to school for that… like after graduation. I didn't tell anyone except for Hattori-sensei… she's the only person who took me seriously. I didn't even take myself seriously… but she helped me. I started doing better in school and while I wasn't  _ the best  _ I was no longer the worst. Natalia helped me write my essay and Ayame got me the things I needed to apply, as we had to send our designs in with our application. Hattori-sensei wrote a letter of recommendation too…”

“Didn't you get in?” Tamami recalled. “I heard from Ayame…”

“Yes.” Hinako nodded, looking down. “They really liked me… I got a full scholarship. Everyone was so proud of me… I thought Hajime would be the same… she smiled and congratulated me. I was so happy… but not for long. When it was time to confirm my acceptance and enroll… I couldn't find the letter with the details on it. I looked everywhere and asked everyone… but nothing. When the deadline passed, I cried so hard I lost my voice. Imagine having the one thing you worked super hard to achieve snatched away from you by mysterious forces… it'll tear you up inside. I was over Ayame's house that day and she was offering me a job as a receptionist at her parent's station, trying to make sure everything was alright.”

“But you didn't take it.” Tamami realized. “Because of Hajime?”

“Yes… and no. I didn't want to look like I was a baby who had been coddled and gotten special treatment my entire life. Hajime really resents that about me and I wanted to appease her. At that time I really wanted her approval. But on the other hand, I was really depressed over everything. I couldn't eat or sleep as everyone around me was so excited over their futures… I came really close to failing my third year and dropping out… until one day… Hajime handed me a letter.”

“Oh no. Oh hell no.” 

“‘I’m sorry I didn't give this to you sooner.’” Hinako said, mimicking Hajime's voice. “She was smiling, and not very apologetic, so I was a little confused. But then I opened the letter… and it was exactly what I was looking for… but I couldn't do anything with it.”

“What the fuck? Did you slap her? Please tell me you slapped her…”

“I was too in shock to say anything… I just thanked Hajime and she smiled at me like she did nothing wrong… yet the envelope was open. She knew what she was doing. I just want to know why she couldn't be normal and support me. She did something like that while maintaining that she's the only person to care about me… but she's such a good friend, right? That was really weird of her.”

“As we established, Hajime is very weird. They say 'be yourself’, but we're about to make Hajime regret following that advice.” Tamami smiled at Hinako. “So… Saturday?”

“Yes… Saturday.”

xxxxx

When Hajime came to work on Sunday, she couldn't help but notice that the atmosphere in the studio was off. While Hiromi was being her usual self, Yuzu had surprised her by also being cold. When Yuzu came in as she usually did, Hajime greeted her as usual.

“Good afternoon, Yuzu!” Hajime greeted.

“Oh… Hajime.” Yuzu greeted back. She then rushed by her, not saying anything else. It was very unlike Yuzu, who usually hung back and made small talk with Hajime.

However, Hajime thought nothing of it. Maybe something bad had happened in her personal life. Hajime shrugged it off and decided to go back to glass cutting, although that didn't last long. Unbeknownst to Hajime, Hiromi had took a break from her work to watch her… however, after five minutes of that, Hiromi decided to make her presence known.

Hajime was busy sorting the colored glass triangles into boxes when Hiromi stood in front of her.

“How can you act like nothing is going on?” Hiromi started. Normally when Hiromi talked to Hajime, Hajime kept working. But right now, Hiromi sounded so hostile, that Hajime  _ had  _ to stop.

“What are you talking about?” Hajime asked, setting her work down.

Hiromi clicked her tongue, then she sighed in disbelief. “You have no idea what kind of stress you put Yuzu under. Poor Yuzu! She wants to get rid of you, but she can't … all because you got rid of Itsuki…”

“Itsuki got rid of herself.” Hajime reminded her. “If you have a job and don't do it… you get fired. With that being said, you should stop talking to me and get back to work, unless you want to get fired as well.”

“You should stop talking to me and get back to work.” Hiromi said mockingly. “Are you serious?”

Hajime ignored her co-worker and went back to sorting glass. She didn't get very far though, because Hiromi slammed her hands down on the table. 

“You planned it to turn out this way.”

“What are you talking about?” Hajime stood up from the table and glared at Hiromi, who shrunk back a little. Yes, Hiromi was feeling intimidated. No, she wasn't going to let that stop her!

“You only learned from the best, right? Your parents raised you  _ soooo  _ well.”

“I don't know them. They didn't raise me. You're really…”

“I'm really what? Say what you want, but it can't be as bad as being the daughter of a scammer. So tell me… what's your intention? Are you going to steal Yuzu's money and loan it to someone else?”

“How do you know about that?” Now it was Hajime's turn to feel intimidated - she felt like she needed to sit, but she wasn't going to let Hiromi bully her like this. But the shakiness of her voice gave it all away. Her mind was racing - did she do anything to piss Aki off lately? Nothing was coming up. Did Aki tell Hiromi and Yuzu her secret for fun? It was a very Aki-like thing to do.

“If you must know… I been knew.” Hiromi admitted. “Your parents were infamous… even coming after my family. I knew their names were Fujiwara, and they had a kid named Hajime… you. Don't you ever wonder why I look at you like you're dirt?”

“Actually… no. I don't.” Hajime admitted. “But what I do know is that you're somehow worse than me… telling this information to Yuzu. I didn't choose my parents. But you chose to tell Yuzu this…”

“It wasn't me.” Hiromi told her. “Fine! I'll tell you the truth… yesterday your friend came by and told Yuzu everything.”

“Aki isn't my friend.” Hajime muttered under her breath. Her face was burning with embarrassment and she could barely keep her head up. Why did this have to happen now?

“Aki? No… not her. It was Hinako and someone else.” Hiromi giggled. 

“No. No way. You're lying. Hinako is a nice girl. She would never do something like that… she's my best friend! The other girl though…” Hajime clenched her fists as she thought about Ayame gleefully exposing her.

“You know, you're really stupid.” Hiromi interrupted. “Hinako is your best friend, you say? No. She was pretty eager to throw you under the bus. Excited, even. She seemed so proud of herself… the other girl could barely talk; that's how excited Hinako was! I shouldn't be surprised that your so-called best friend hates you… everyone hates you. Gee, I wonder why.”

“Okay whatever. Shut up, Hiromi.”

“Are you mad?” Hiromi was definitely not going to just 'shut up’. As always, she got a kick from agitating Hajime. “I hate you too. You're negative and bitter… it's so tiring. You're like an energy black hole… you're so draining! I assume your parents had to be charming in order to scam others… They say the apple doesn't fall far from the tree, but if that were true… why are you the most uncharming person in existence?”

“Do you like hearing yourself talk?”

Hiromi sighed deeply. “I guess it doesn't matter… your blood is so dirty that you'd find a way to scam us. I bet you were planning on scamming Hinako too. She probably found out, which is why she turned on you.”

Hajime did not take that well. She threw her work in Hiromi's direction, who yelped as the glass pieces hit the floor. “You take that back. Hinako would never turn on me! You take that back! I would never think of scamming Hinako… I would never scam her… or anyone. I hate you with every fiber of my being, but I'd still never scam you!”

“I can't believe you.” Hiromi laughed, hiding her fear. “I can't trust you, and neither does Yuzu. She's looking for replacements as we speak… and…”

“Hiromi Seki, that's enough!” Yuzu had walked over to the two, a serious expression on her face. Hiromi, clearly embarrassed, covered her hands with her mouth.

“How… how long have you been standing there?” she asked sheepishly.

“Long enough. I don't pay you to pick fights with Hajime. Get back to work.”

“Okay.” Hiromi ran back to her workspace, leaving Hajime alone with Yuzu. Hajime sat back down, and continued to sort the glass, as Yuzu watched her carefully.

“I'm really sorry.” Hajime apologized. She felt like she should apologize for something, even though in her eyes, she did nothing wrong - she didn't ask to be born to questionable parents. No one chose who they were born to or what circumstances they were born into. For that reason alone, Hajime found Hiromi's issue with her to be weird.

“Ah… about that.” Yuzu sighed miserably. “I've been thinking about this all night… and while I appreciate you and your hard work…”

Hajime's stomach dropped as she knew what was coming. “Are you… are you firing me?”

“I might as well just come out and say it. Yes.”

“Why?” Hajime questioned. “Why? Is it because of my parents? That's stupid! I wasn't the one who committed the crime… it was them…”

“You're right… however… Hiromi and I were talking about this… I just get a really dark vibe from you and it's not worth putting up with anymore. Also I saw how you threw that glass at Hiromi. I don't know if I can work with someone who's mentally unstable…”

“But you can't fire me.” Hajime could feel the tears coming on. “I need this job. I need it, you don't understand… if I don't have the money… Hinako's life will be…”

Yuzu shook her head. “You say you're not like your parents but it sounds like you're into some illegal stuff… I don't know what is going on and I don't care. But what I do know is that I wish luck on your job search.”

_ Fuck you,  _ Hajime wanted to say, but she couldn't. Instead, she started sobbing over how unfair it was. 

“Hajime… please leave.” Yuzu told her.

Without saying a goodbye, Hajime left the studio, thinking to herself. What was she supposed to do now? Aki was going to expect her money, but there was no money. There was no way that Hajime was going to give Aki 60% of her last paycheck, which meant that Aki would definitely go after Hinako. But why would Hinako even tell Yuzu and Hiromi that? How did Hinako even find out? Hajime guarded that secret with her life.

It was then that Hajime remembered that Hinako mentioned that she was friends with Aki, who of course took great pleasure in telling the story of how the Fujiwara family ruined her life. Of course. But that didn't answer the question of  _ why  _ Hinako decided to expose Hajime. She'd find her answer soon enough, though.

Hajime made her way to the nearest phone booth and dialed a number. There were so many things that she wanted to do, but she could only hope that she was doing this in the right order. 

The girl on the other end picked up the phone. “Hello?”

“Hello Akira. It's Hajime.”

xxxxx

“She's going to kill you. Like actually kill you.”

“Hmm… maybe. I wouldn't defend myself if it came down to that though.”

“Hey… don't be like that. I know! When she tells me to get Charlene, you can run away.”

“I don't think I can out run Aki. People called her sergeant for a reason.”

“You can out run Aki if you  _ believe.” _

Hajime rolled her eyes, not saying anything. She and Akira were in front of Aki's house, both delaying the inevitable. On the way over, Hajime told Akira everything, who's mood seemed to dampen as she realized what Hajime getting fired meant. But now, Akira seemed to be trying to help Hajime out.

“You know… what I don't understand is… why would Hinako do such a thing? Does she know what Aki is planning for her? She just signed her own death sentence. Also… why would Aki tell her that? Wouldn't it be better for her if you kept your job?”

“You know why. She thinks she can get more money from Hinako selling herself. Like Hinako would quietly agree to do that…”

“Prostitution is illegal.” Akira attempted.

“Do you think Aki cares about following the law? She hasn't gotten caught yet so what does it matter...” Hajime's voice trailed off. “I can't believe this…”

“This Hinako girl seems very immature.” Akira observed. 

“She is… but I really care about her.” Hajime admitted. “If you met her, you would too. That's how I know something is wrong with Aki… they're friends but she's willing to sell her…”

“Huh? Aki and Hinako are not friends.” Akira clarified. “Hinako called her once and requested to meet her. Aki went along with it.”

“She did not.”

“She did! I answered the phone because I was using it to live stream… and she was like 'is this Aki Yamato?’ which lead me to believe that she looked Aki up in the phone book. So whatever Hinako's motive was… it was deliberate.” Akira explained. “Honestly? If I were you, I'd never talk to Hinako again.”

“Well that's you.” Hajime sighed deeply. “Let's go. I want to get this over with.”

The two girls headed into the house. Hajime expected for Aki to jump out of the shadows with Charlene and corner her, but surprisingly, Aki was coming down the stairs. Her hair was down and she was wearing a silk robe, looking very relaxed. Hajime took this as a good thing. Maybe Aki wasn't serious about her offer.

“Did you just wake up?” Akira greeted. 

“Yes…” Aki turned to Hajime. “What are you doing here? Shouldn't you be cutting glass? Or… wait. Oh shit. I knew I should've recorded the news this morning.”

“What?”

“What are you talking about?” Hajime asked.

“Hinako told me that she was going to expose you on national television. Did that happen?”

“I hope not…” Hajime answered, then as Aki's words registered with her, her eyes got bigger. “She did what?”

Aki smiled. “She was so moved by my story that she just had to. But I didn't think she would, since she doesn't seem like she has newscaster friends. Or does she?”

“And you didn't think to stop her?” Hajime screeched. “Why not? What if someone threatened to expose you on TV? Would you sit there and let them do it? You're really weak minded,  _ Sergeant _ !”

Aki's smile faded. “Hey. Do you want to die?”

“Actually, yes, I do!” Hajime shouted. “If it means I never have to deal with you again… thanks to you keeping your mouth shut, I lost my job!”

“That sucks. But whatever. You don't have to deal with me ever again. I'm done with you, Hajime.”

“You… what?” Hajime's anxiety was now replaced with relief. How long had Hajime been waiting to hear that?

Aki ignored Hajime. “Akira, go through my phone and get Hinako's number. Bring her here as soon as possible.”

“Um…” Akira nervously looked at Hajime, who's relief was now replaced with fear.

“Why do you need her information?” Hajime demanded.

“I think a better question is, why do you care? You always have something smart to say about my lack of friends but you aren't smart enough to realize that Hinako doesn't like you?” Aki asked.

“She does. Don't say that.” 

“Be quiet. Don't interrupt me when I'm speaking. She lied to me saying that she wanted to meet because she wanted to ask me about your birthday gift. However, that wasn't the truth. She wanted to know your secret, so I told her… and now she must pay the price. Aren't you glad? You're off the hook now thanks to your fake friend.”

“Don't say that” Hajime repeated. “Don't do this to her. Hinako has a weak mindset… she's fragile. Please… I mean it … please don't do this to her.”

“You think I wasn't like that at one point?” Aki asked.

“I doubt it.” Hajime snapped. “You have no humanity.”

“Hajime… there are better ways for you to go about this.” Akira spoke up. “Aki, I normally don't talk back to you but I think you're going too far here… the law is…”

“Fuck the law. It couldn't protect me or my mother, so why should it protect Hinako? What's so special about her that she must be spared, but when it was me no one bat an eyelash?”

Neither Akira or Hajime could find the words to answer Aki's question. Annoyed, Aki began to go back upstairs, presumably to get her phone. However, before Aki could get far, Hajime ran over to her and grabbed her by her ankles. Aki was about to kick her away, but she stopped when she noticed how Hajime was crying softly to herself.

“I’ll do it.” Hajime said slowly. “I'll do whatever you want me to do.”

“Ah… are you sure about that?”

“Yes… Hinako is a lot of things but she isn't the person you should be going after. It's me… so I'll do it. Leave her out of this…”

Aki smiled. “Now you'll see first hand what I have to go through… how much I suffered because of your family. I'm very excited.”

“Come on, don't you think you're being a little extreme here?” Akira asked.

“Hajime had a way out and she didn't want to take it… so I guess we're back to square one. All because she wanted to be noble and save her friend, who doesn't even like her.”

“Hinako  _ does  _ like me.” Hajime insisted, wiping the tears from her eyes. With her hands off of Aki's ankles, Aki kicked her and walked back upstairs. Akira ran over to Hajime and hugged her.

“I'm really sorry it came to this.” Akira apologized. “You made a very hard decision…”

“I only want Hinako to like me.” Hajime admitted. “But if she's doing those kinds of things because of me… I won't be able to live normally… she won't be able to live normally… why couldn't my parents be normal people? Why did they have to hurt others? I can't stand it…”

“It's too bad we can't pick our relatives.”

“You're telling me.” Hajime stood up, wiping her eyes. “If it wasn't for them and the situation they put me in, people would probably like me. It isn't fair…”

“So now what?” Akira asked. “What are you going to do now?”

“I need to ask Hinako some questions.” Hajime told her. “I need to ask her some very important questions.”


	7. VII

VII

Despite the urgency that Hajime had while talking to Akira, Hajime didn't actually get the energy to talk to Hinako until Wednesday. However, on Wednesday, Hinako was working a long shift, so she had to wait until Thursday, when she was off. Hinako was surprisingly okay with that, so on Thursday afternoon, Hajime found herself sitting in Hinako's room. She sat on the bed, as Hinako sat at the vanity, brushing one of her doll's hair.

“I'm surprised you're here.” Hinako started, not even looking at Hajime. “I thought you had work today.”

“Well… things changed.” Hajime said. “I only work Sunday through Wednesday now.”

“I see, I see… I'm glad you're taking it easy.” Hinako held up her doll and smiled at it. “Don't you think she's pretty? I got her last week. Her name is Charlotte.”

“Yeah… she's pretty alright…” Hajime sighed. “I'm glad you have something you enjoy, as juvenile as it seems.”

Hinako stopped smiling and set her doll down. “You're acting like I still play with them… I don't. I just display them. Sometimes I make clothes for them, but I don't play with them... Charlotte, Diana, Elizabeth, Victoria… I only have four. Maybe I'd have five… if…”

“If what?” Hajime challenged.

“If you weren't such a shitty friend.” Hinako said, then she gasped, covering her mouth. “Oh no! Did I say that? I didn't mean it. I'm sorry.”

“Yes. I'm sorry too.” Hajime jumped off of the bed and walked over to Hinako. “What's your damage? I'm a shitty friend? Why are you acting like you didn't get me fired?”

“Oops… I didn't think they'd actually fire you.” Hinako giggled.

“Stop laughing. This isn't funny. Hiromi told me everything, how you and Ayame came by and exposed me. What the hell?”

“What the hell is absolutely right…” Hinako stood up, although she nearly fell back once she noticed how hard Hajime was glaring at her.

“You went to Aki and listened to whatever she had to say. And instead of asking me if it were true, you assumed it was true and decided to expose me. I guess rich bitch Ayame wouldn't let a poor orphan stand next to her on TV, so costing me my job had to do.”

“Rich bitch Ayame? First of all, you should really be grateful towards Ayame… she wouldn't do it. She's not the bitch here…”

“What a surprise.” Hajime said flatly.

“Your one sided hatred towards Ayame is sickening. Disgusting, actually. Surprise! Tamami was the one who came with me to your job. She gave me the idea to tell Yuzu everything… and I'm glad she did.”

“Why? What did I do to you to deserve that?”

“Good question.” Hinako walked past Hajime, taking her acceptance letter off of the wall. She threw it at Hajime, who caught it. Hajime's hands grew clammy as she realized what it was.

“I… I'm surprised you still have this.”

“I'm sure you're nowhere as surprised as I was when you handed me that. Did it feel good ruining my future?”

“Couldn't you reapply?” Hajime asked in a shaky tone of voice.

“The teachers graduated me out of pity. My final grades are dismal. No design school will take me anymore, no matter how good I am... So tell me. Why? What did I do to you to deserve you stealing my acceptance letter?”

“I'm … I'm sorry.” Hajime apologized. “I wasn't thinking…”

“Now do you understand? I did what I did because I don't like you. No… I  _ hate  _ you. You're trash. 'I'm sorry'... That's all you have to say? But you'll act like we're best friends…”

“Because we are.”

“No… not anymore. You call me foolish and delusional but at least I know when a friendship is over.”

“Hinako… please…” Hajime begged. “You have no idea what I am doing for you… the least you could do is be nicer…”

“Okay… so what are you doing?” Hinako asked. “Tell me why I should be nicer to you. Go ahead. I'm listening.”

Hajime sighed deeply. Her heart was in her throat, and it was beating so fast that her ears were ringing. It was now or never, she figured, watching as Hinako sat back down.

“So you talked to Aki…” Hajime started. 

“Yeah? What about it? She's very nice.” Hinako said, picking up Charlotte. Hajime focused on the doll's hair. It was shiny and black - Hinako took really good care of her dolls.

“That's what you think. The reason why I never have any money is because she'd threaten me into giving me 60% of my paycheck to cover the debt her parents have… and by threaten I really mean it. She'd use her guns to scare me…”

Hajime looked over at Hinako, who was staring with wide eyes as she hugged Charlotte tightly. Hajime took that as a good sign, so she continued,

“I don't understand why you went to see Aki in the first place. But that's irrelevant now. Aki had a deal with me that if I stopped giving her money… she'd… um… force you into prostitution.”

“What?!” Hinako dropped Charlotte onto the ground, the doll's eyes closing as she fell onto her back. Hajime wished that she could do the same.

“What do I have to do with anything?” Hinako demanded. “Is my last name Fujiwara? Were my parents criminals? What's wrong with her?”

“Exactly… so since I lost my job…” 

“Oh no! Am I going to have to…”

“No… no…” Hajime hesitated. “I couldn't let Aki do such things to you… so… I volunteered myself.”

“So you agreed to sell yourself… because you didn't want me to do it?” Hinako asked. 

Hajime couldn't speak anymore. She just closed her eyes and nodded, trying to hide the urge to cry. She hoped that Hinako would understand and maybe try to help her out, as Hajime had helped Hinako before.

Hinako had stood up, so she was standing in front of Hajime. Hajime was expecting for Hinako to hug her or show her support in another way, but Hinako thought otherwise.

“You're filthy.” Hinako told her. “So tell me… how many men have you slept with so far?”

“Do you think I want to do something like that?” Hajime asked. “Seriously?”

“Why didn't you go to the police or something?” Hinako demanded. “You're going a bit far for some money. I know you like it, but…”

“Did my story go over your head? I don't like money. The money I get goes to Aki because…”

“Shut up… shut up.” Hinako shook her head. “You act so high and mighty but you're the daughter of two scammers. You yourself are a prostitute.”

“Don't be like that.” Hajime started. “I…”

“...am nothing. Hinako and Hajime. The princess and the prostitute. I can't be friends with someone like you… princesses wouldn't do that. Not that I want to. I'm sorry that you're so lost.”

“I'm sorry too. I'm sorry that you're a huge bitch. I'm sorry that you're such a poor student you'll never be able to get into design school.”

Hinako tried her hardest to hide how taken aback she was, but it was no use. “You… you think I'm a bitch? When  _ you're _ Bitchlord Supreme? And what's that about design school? Screw you. Oh wait, your customers have that taken care of already!”

“Hinako!”

“At least I'm an upright citizen from a clean family. I'll show you out. Don't ever come back here again… we're done.”

“If you were a princess like you said you were, you'd do everything in your power to help me!” Hajime shouted at her. “There's more to it than fancy parties and wearing pretty dresses! You may look like a princess but you have the attitude of an evil witch! Evil witch Hinako!”

Hinako ignored Hajime and left the room. She had wanted Hajime to follow her, but Hajime stayed back, noticing Hinako's pendant on the wall. 

_ With the way the light catches it, the diamond must be real… I wonder… _ Hajime quickly snatched the pendant off the wall and threw it into the bottom of her bag. Stealing the prized gift of your friend was low, but Hajime didn't care. Hinako would probably do the same, provided that Hajime had stuff worth stealing.

“What are you doing? Come on!” Hinako yelled from the front door.

Without saying a word to Hinako, or even looking at her, Hajime left the apartment. 

xxxxx

“This is very valuable. The gold is 24 carats and the diamond… it's real. What you have here is… something amazing.”

Three days after getting kicked out of Hinako's apartment, Hajime had decided to venture to a pawn shop - Tsuchiya Pawn Shop. Hajime had one intention, and that was to sell Hinako's gift for money. The best outcome would entail Hajime getting enough money to “buy” her way out of being an escort on Aki's behalf. Now that Hinako was in the clear, it was time for Hajime to save herself, even if it meant crossing several ethical lines.

“That's what I like to hear.” Hajime smiled at the girl appraising the pendant, a fake smile on her face. Truth was, Hajime was worn out. However, the cashier, Ako, didn't need to know that.

Ako set her magnifying glass down and stared at Hajime. “Ten million yen.” she announced. “That's how much I can give to you.”

“T-t-ten million yen?” Hajime placed her hand on her heart, trying to steady herself. She had been expecting thirty thousand yen at the most.

“Yes.” Ako nodded. “You'd be surprised how much 'worthless’ stuff can cost… I've had people faint over the values I've given them.”

“I can see why.” Hajime told her. “Okay. It's a deal. I'll sell it to you.”

“Really? You said this was from your beloved grandmother… you seem really eager to get rid of it. You aren't going to have any regrets?”

“Nope. I don't wear jewelry anyway…” Hajime smiled. “So please…”

“Okay… wait here.” 

Ako disappeared in the back of the store, leaving Hajime to stare at the diamond pendant. She began to wonder how much Ayame paid for this, but the number gave her a headache. Hajime decided to just settle on 'an obscene amount of money’.

As Hajime was thinking of this, she could've sworn she saw Hinako in one of the many cuts of the diamond, giving her that sad look that she had perfected.

“How could you do this to me? I thought we were friends.” Hinako would say.

“I thought we were friends too.” Hajime muttered under her breath, unaware that Saya was now standing behind her.

“I knew it was you!” Saya greeted. “I saw you in the window as I was walking outside… and I decided to say hello.”

“Oh… hi Saya.” Hajime quickly positioned herself so that she blocked Saya's view of the pendant. “Long time no see, right?”

“Yes… the last time I've saw you was at the party… I wish it would've gone better for you…”

Hajime shrugged. “Don’t worry about it… it's all water under the bridge.”

“I went to the department store yesterday and tried asking Hinako about you… I was trying to get your phone number…, she didn't seem to be in the mood to talk.”

“Oh? Well I don't have a phone… if you give me your number I can call you from a payphone.” Hajime suggested.

Saya giggled at this. “That's so old fashioned, but I can respect it. Hold on.”

Then, much to Hajime's horror, Saya placed her bag up on the counter. She dug out a small notepad and began to write some numbers down, pausing when she noticed the pendant.

“Wait a minute… isn't that…”

“I'm back!” Ako announced, holding the papers in her hands. Her excitement waned once she noticed how Saya had picked up the pendant and was looking at it.

“Saya, please put my grandmother's pendant down.” Hajime ordered. 

“Your grandmother's…? This is Hinako's. What are you doing with this and why are you selling it?”

“My grandmother is named Hinako.” Hajime lied.

“But you don't know your grandmother… right?”

“I knew something was up.” Ako muttered. “Miss Fujiwara… you should be lucky that your friend here stopped the sale… if the original owner reported it as theft, you would be charged with a felony because of how much it's worth. I don't need that kind of business. Please don't come back here again.”

“Yes…” Hajime had no other option but to agree, albeit she did it weakly. However, feeling like the world was coming to an end, she dragged Saya out of the store by her wrist.

“A felony…” Saya repeated, once they were on the sidewalk. “Hajime… I don't know what's going on, but no amount of money is worth ruining your friendship with Hinako… let alone your life.”

“Ten million yen.” Hajime said through her teeth. “You just cost me ten million yen because you just _ had  _ to do the right thing! Why couldn't you have kept your mouth shut?”

“I wasn't going to let you commit a crime. You should really take this back to Hinako and apologize.”

“No. No! I will never apologize to Hinako. She's nothing to me! An ungrateful, spoiled brat… for all I care, she can die in a fire! No… she should've died in that fire that killed her parents!” 

“Hajime, you don't mean that…” Saya said slowly. “I can see where you're coming from, but you don't really wish Hinako died, do you?”

“I… I don't know anymore. I don't know anything… she hates me, she hates me...” tears fell from Hajime's eyes and she covered her face with her hands. She couldn't finish her sentence, too many things were happening at once.

Noticing how passerby were watching, Saya reached in her bag and handed Hajime a tissue.

“I think we should discuss this somewhere private. I live nearby…”

xxxxx

If Hajime were in her right state of mind, she would've said something about how modest the Matsubara's townhouse looked. Nothing about it hinted that Saya was from a rich family - Hajime actually liked this, but she was too shaken up to say anything.

The two were in Saya's bedroom, Saya holding the pendant as Hajime laid face down on the bed. To Saya, watching Hajime cry was interesting… Hajime came off as serious and stoic to her, like she had no emotions. This served as a reminder that underneath everything, Hajime was a person too.

“I need that pendant.” Hajime said finally. “Give it back.” She was still laying down, but she had looked up so that she was staring at Saya. 

With the way Hajime's eyes had swollen up and how raw her voice had gotten, Saya was surprised that she didn't hand the pendant over immediately. Instead, she just said, “I can't let you do something illegal…”

“Doing illegal things runs in my blood. I'm a piece of shit, okay? Hand it over.”

Saya shook her head. “What do you mean?”

“Hinako didn't tell you?” Hajime decided to come clean and tell Saya everything relating to her parents, including Aki's extortion and Hinako trying to expose her. Saya seemed especially alarmed by the events leading up to Hajime stealing the pendant. When Hajime finished, she was so ashamed that she couldn't look at her friend.

“Oh my God…” Saya reached out and gently touched Hajime's hand. “First of all, did you actually start… you know…”

“Not yet… but any day now…” Hajime answered. “People think I'm dirty now… just wait until Hinako starts telling everyone that I'm a street walker… I'm trash.”

“You are not trash… stop saying that. You only agreed to do such things because you wanted to protect Hinako. A trash person wouldn't do that. If anyone is trash in this situation, it's Aki. What she is doing is illegal. Soliciting people like she's doing to you is illegal. We could put her in jail…” Saya appeared to be thinking. “I get she's upset at your parents… but there's better ways for her to take out her anger… let me think… my family's lawyer is in San Francisco right now… on vacation with his daughter. If you can wait until he gets back…”

“No way… I can't afford that. It's nice but…”

“I'll pay for everything. It isn't right for you to deal with this on your own. Extortion… blackmail… Hinako... no wonder you seem so stressed out all the time.”

“Saya…” Hajime sighed. “You shouldn't waste efforts on me…”

“No…” Saya shook her head. “I consider you to be my friend, so of course I want to help you. I will always be on your side, Hajime.”

“Really…? Then why did you stop the sale? All I had to do was sell the pendant and give Aki the money… she'd leave me alone after that. Hinako would never talk to me again either… that's two good things.”

“Is it?”

“Hinako is a spoiled brat. She's annoying and irritating as well, so yes… that's a good thing. I don't know how she was treated in her household, but I'm assuming she got everything she wanted since she used to claim she was actually a princess.”

“I see…”

“But after she came to Sacred Heart… everyone there coddled her. I did too. Everyone felt bad for her because of how she lost her entire family… not just her parents. She had siblings too, and her grandmother lived with her. Yet she was the sole survivor…”

xxxxx

_ Five years ago… _

_ I wonder if I could get my roommate changed. How much longer do I have to deal with this? _

It was a summer night in the middle of July, and while Hajime should've been sleeping, she decided not to. Instead, she had been practicing her handwriting. While most people only wrote with one of their hands, Hajime could use both. However, because it was more convenient to use her right hand, her left handed writing was slightly sloppier. This actually bothered Hajime so much that she decided to copy a passage from her literature textbook every night during the summer vacation.

It had been two weeks and Hajime was starting to see improvement in her “lefty” handwriting. It was corny, but Hajime felt accomplished. 

As for tonight, Hajime had finished, and was now looking around her room. It wasn't until she noticed Hinako's new porcelain doll sitting on the shelf, staring at her that she got chills. 

Hinako… Hajime didn't really feel anything negative towards her, but these days, that was starting to change. They had always had a cordial relationship, they'd greet each other. Hajime would always give Hinako candy and sweets in an attempt to get her to open up - it took months for Hinako to smile, but it worked. Hajime would help Hinako with her homework, but with how Hinako was, that often translated to Hajime giving Hinako the answers. 

The turning point, however, was when Hinako turned 13 back in April. She used her allowance to buy a porcelain doll, which she named Elizabeth. 

Hajime found Elizabeth's presence creepy enough but she found it even weirder when Hinako would talk to her and play with Elizabeth - wasn't 13 a bit too old to be playing with dolls? Hajime, who had never been much of a doll person, believed so.

She got up from her desk, and then turned Elizabeth around so that the doll's back was to her. Hajime was feeling very proud of herself… until she turned around and saw that Hinako had entered the room. 

“Ah…” Hajime began. “You were in the bathroom for a very long time, so I wanted to make sure Elizabeth was okay.” 

Hinako smoothed out her nightgown. “I'm fine…” she said in a low voice. “I got sick because I ate, too much at dinner… way too much…”

“I noticed. We all noticed.” Hajime said.

Hinako's face reddened and her expression became angry. “What is it? What are you implying?” 

“I didn't see you at breakfast or lunch.” Hajime pointed out. “You know the nuns are concerned about you and -”

“I wasn't hungry.” Hinako cut her off. “I don't want to talk to you. Turn the lights off.”

“Okay. Sleep well.”

Hajime cut the lights off and dozed off. She slept for about four hours or so, until she heard the sound of someone screaming. Even her voice was marked with the strain of tears.

“Mama! I need you… Papa, where are you? Nana… I'm sorry, this is all my fault… Serika… Seito… let's make it out… please… please!!”

_ Hinako. _

Hajime cut the light on and found Hinako on by the window, which was open. The poor girl was halfway out of the window, as if she were about to jump out. 

“Why am I the only one left? Why?! I don't deserve it… I don't deserve to live…”

Fearing that Hinako would try to end her life, Hajime dragged Hinako out of the window and shut it.

“Hinako!” Hajime shouted. That was all it took to bring Hinako back into reality. The girl looked very frightened by Hajime's presence.

“What are you doing here? What time is it? Why is my face wet… am I… was I crying?”

Hajime hugged Hinako tightly, because she wasn't sure of what she should do.

“I think… I think we should sleep together tonight.” Hajime suggested slowly. She figured that this way, if Hinako tried jumping out of the window or something, she'd have a faster chance of stopping it.

“You are okay with that?” Hinako asked. “But why?”

“Yes…” Hajime nodded. “I'll tell you in the morning. Just please… get in my bed. Sleep near the wall.”

“Okay Hajime…” Then, despite the tears on her face, Hinako giggled. “If I'm a princess, you're my prince!”

Hajime felt her face getting hot; she was about tell Hinako that it wasn't like that, but she decided against it. After all, Hinako felt well enough to smile, and most importantly, Hinako fell right back to sleep. Hajime was not willing to wake her back up.

xxxxx

“Wow.” Saya said. “So what happened in the morning?”

“I told Hinako what happened and she had no memory of it. She thought me asking her to get in my bed was a dream though… but it wasn't, since she woke up in my bed. The nuns were pissed though… and I got hit with a ruler 100 times for taking part in 'indecent activity’...” Hajime recalled. “My hands swelled up so much…”

“Ah… I went to Catholic school, so I know all about that.” Saya sighed deeply. “But about Hinako…”

“After that night, she would always get in my bed and sleep… because she felt safe next to me… that's what she said…” Hajime's voice trailed off. “That's when we started getting closer… I noticed that the more she talked to me, the less she talked to her doll. She'd stop making herself sick too…”

“It sounds like you really helped her a lot.” 

“I always wonder if Hinako still has nightmares like that… I know she gets them but not ones like  _ that _ … God. Now I'm back to worrying about that bitch… what's wrong with me?”

“It sounds like she has a very bad case of survivor's guilt… which is very understandable. And you care because you're human. There's nothing wrong with that.”

“But the problem is… it's one sided… she doesn't like me. If she did… she wouldn't have tried to expose me. She is so…”

“She owes you an apology for talking to you like that. Also her behavior at the party…”

“It hurts so much because I did so much for her… but she doesn't appreciate it. The fact that she intended to go on live TV… Why even go that far? She doesn't dislike me… she hates me. Why? What did I do?”

“Her acceptance letter.” Saya reminded her.

“How… how did you know about that?” Hajime demanded. By now, she was sitting up on the bed.

“Tamami. Who else?” Saya decided to leave out the fact that Tamami posted that on Facebook, but using Hinako and Hajime's initials. Everyone was able to figure it out fairly quickly, most people siding with Hinako. However, more than a few were yelling at Tamami to 'delete this’. Tamami, of course, only deleted it when an angry Ayame told her to.

But Hajime didn't need to know that right now, Saya figured.

“Of course… see. Hinako probably told her that… say it.”

“Say what?”

“'You're trash, Hajime’.” 

Saya shook her head. “I’m not going to pretend that I approve of what you did. I also don't understand why you did that to Hinako in the first place. With that being said, I also don't understand why you're so eager to put yourself down… you can still make things right… if you really want to.”

“How?” Hajime challenged.

Saya handed Hajime the pendant. “The first step is not making things worse. Give this back and apologize sincerely. It's a step in the right direction, don't you think?”

xxxxx

_ Step in the right direction. Apologize sincerely… _ , Hajime stared at the pendant in her hand as she sat on Bus #56. Saya had said that Hajime could make things right if  _ she  _ wanted to, but did she want to?

Hajime wasn't so sure. 

She still wanted to sell the pendant. However… Ako's shop offered the highest price… and Hajime had ended up blacklisting herself from there. On the other hand… apologizing to Hinako? Hajime would've rather drank gasoline. Her pride had been mortally wounded by the events of the past few days, and Hajime blamed Hinako for everything. After all, if Hinako could do the same...

_You don't know how hard I tried to be friends with her. As much as I want to… I can't… all because she can't let the past go. Get over it. She's so dumb she'd probably drop out during the first semester anyway… I did her a favor!,_ Hajime stared hard at the pendant. _If I can't do what I want with it, neither can Hinako._ _Next person who gets on this bus… it's theirs._

Luckily for Hajime, she didn't have to wait very long; the bus stopped and a girl about her age walked on, her wavy hair tied up in a ponytail. She wore a pink sundress with a jean jacket - very fashionable, Hajime thought. The girl sat down in the row across from Hajime and began to check herself out in a fancy hand mirror. After deciding that the girl looked friendly enough, Hajime called out to her.

“Excuse me…” Hajime started.

“Eh?” Mirror girl closed her mirror and pointed at herself. “Are you talking to me? You can see me?”

“Of course I can…” Hajime answered, somewhat confused. “Why wouldn't I?”

“I'm sorry, I wasn't thinking straight.” the girl smiled at Hajime. “So you wanted my attention?”

“Yes. Um… I found this in my room, and I think that it would fit you more than me…”

“Wow. Are you serious?” the girl's eyes got bigger. “I can't believe this… today must be my lucky day.”

“I'm glad you like it.” Hajime smiled, then she quickly glanced outside. “Oh, my stop is coming up! Have a nice night!”

Mirror girl didn't say anything, instead she just stared lovingly at her new gift, ignoring Hajime's well wishes.

“Bitch.” Hajime swore as she got off the bus. It shouldn't have bothered her that much, but Hajime was tired of being looked down on, by strangers and non-strangers. She needed to clear her head.

Hajime decided not to go to her apartment, but rather, up on the roof. She had only been up on the roof once, when she first moved in - Natalia and Hinako had surprised her with a picnic when Hajime first moved in, and they decided to eat on the roof. They left immediately afterwards, as they both had school the next day.

Despite Hajime's neighborhood being not the greatest, her building offered an amazing view. Hajime walked over to the edge, staring at all of the city lights. She found the view inspiring, even though there was nothing in her life to be inspired by. 

It was then she remembered Saya's lawyer. She opened up her wallet and pulled out the business card…

_ Koichi Himekawa. _

“He sounds like an asshole. A major tool. I bet he'd  throw me in jail for my parents crimes.” Hajime said out loud. She tore the card in half and dropped it down onto the street. The mid May breeze blew the pieces of paper away, presumably into the gutter.  Not thinking much of it, she continued to stare out at the city, listening to the faint sounds of the traffic below.

This went on for about 20 more minutes, until the wind kicked up. Hajime was without a sweater, so she was starting to get chilly. It was also getting late… maybe she should go to sleep. She should head back in.

Hajime didn't get far though.

Just as Hajime was about to turn around, she heard the click of high heels, getting louder and louder. 

_ Someone was up on the roof with her, and not only that, they were getting closer! _

As the heels got closer, Hajime's heartbeat got louder. She knew the bare minimum when it came to self defense… who could it have been? Hinako? No way, she wouldn't dare. Aki? Maybe. Hiromi? In what universe? Akira? That made more sense… but Akira preferred flat shoes - Converse, to be exact.

The steps finally stopped, and Hajime turned around, expecting to see Akira. But she saw nothing. No one was on the roof with her.

Hajime sighed of relief. Maybe she had been imagining things - she was tired and it had been a long day. She needed rest. Unfortunately… Hajime wasn't going to get it.

“Over here.” 

Hajime slowly turned around to see that Mirror Girl, or at least, her evil twin, was standing on the very edge of the roof… but something seemed different… her outfit had changed. She was now wearing a red and black outfit that looked like a dress, but with the way her navel was exposed, it wasn't. Even the ribbon in her hair and her high heels matched. But what was way more shocking than her fashion sense or balancing skills, was the fact that she was holding the pendant.

_ Hinako's pendant. _

“Who are you…? And what are you doing here? Did you follow me up here? Where did you get that pendant from?”

The girl smirked. “You ask a lot of questions, Hajime. I don't feel like answering them all, so I'll only answer the most important one…”

“You talk way too much. Who are you?” Hajime demanded. 

“The angel of death, Kyoko Igarashi.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Random fun facts:  
> -(at the time of this writing) 10,000,000 JPY = 91,328.50 USD. you could probably spark every deresute SSR in existence and still have money left over.  
> -Hajime really is ambidextrous ... we stan  
> -All of Hinako's dolls are named after British royalty  
> -Tamami, Hinako and Saya all speak in 3rd person in the games... I changed it though because I thought that'd be troublesome to write with lol  
> -Kyoko's lim SSR is tied with Miho's second limited as my favorite SSR in the game... PCS and mellow yellow are my favorite units and my cute team is actually a combination of both sans Uzuki


	8. VIII

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lol

Part II

“If you want to know what the Lord God thinks of money, just look at those to whom he gives it.” - Dorothy Parker

VIII

It seemed as if everything went silent as Kyoko stood before Hajime, who was smiling as if she had introduced herself as an idol, and not an angel. Angels? Back at the orphanage, when Hajime was younger, the nuns would read stories about angels to her. Hajime was the type of person who only believed what she saw, so she rejected the idea of angels existing. But maybe she was wrong...

“Angel… angel of death?” Hajime repeated. “No… no way! You're shitting me.”

Kyoko sat down on the ledge, staring up at Hajime. “You think I'm lying, don't you?”

“I mean… yeah… if angels exist, shouldn't they be in heaven?” Hajime asked. “Why are you lurking the earth?”

“Because the Earth is fun.” Kyoko answered. “Not as fun as hell, but it's similar. I can't speak about heaven, because I've never been there.”

“Wait what?” Hajime asked. “I thought angels come from heaven.”

“Unless they get expelled.” Kyoko rolled her eyes. “I'm illegitimate - the product of an affair, so I was expelled just for being born… but that's besides the point… but I've come to tell you something.”

“What is it?” Hajime held her breath. Everything about this situation felt bizarre.

“Whenever people see me… or my counterpart, Miho, it means they're about to die within 24 hours.” Kyoko explained. “Which is why I was surprised you saw me on the bus.”

“Oh I'm about to die?” Hajime laughed bitterly. “Just when things couldn't get any worse... You're joking.”

“No I'm not.” Kyoko said seriously. “Your expiration date is actually in 2 hours from now.”

“Expiration date?”

“You heard me.”

“Oh yeah? So how is it going to end for me,  _ Kyoko _ ?” Hajime challenged. 

“You have a very shitty attitude. But whatever. You're feeling cold, aren't you?” Kyoko asked. 

“No…” Hajime lied, and Kyoko narrowed her eyes at her.

“You're going to go into your apartment, expecting warmth. But your apartment is cold, because you left the window open…”

“How did you know?” Hajime asked. 

“How do you think?” Kyoko continued. “You close the window and wait for the room to warm up, but it doesn't… so you go into your closet and dig out a space heater.”

“That's what I usually do when it's cold…”

“Yes… you and your cheap space heater with faulty wiring… the one you thought about replacing but didn't, for whatever reason. You get in the bed and fall asleep… only for it to spark up and … well… you die in a fire.”

“That's…” Hajime's voice trailed off, then she smiled. “If what you are saying is true, I'm going to go plug it in. I have nothing to lose. Thank you, Kyoko.”

_ What a weirdo,  _ Kyoko thought as she stared at Hajime.  _ Most people would try to avoid their death, but she seems to be challenging me? _

Hajime, bored with Kyoko’s lack of response, began to walk towards the door. She didn't know if she was actually going to do such a thing - after all, she did live in an apartment building - but Kyoko didn't need to know that.

“Ah… so you want to die.” Kyoko called out.

Hajime turned back around. “Not exactly… but I don't want to live either. I'm sure heaven is a lot nicer…”

Kyoko started giggling, which annoyed Hajime. What was so funny about this? 

“You think you're going to heaven?” Kyoko asked. “I'm not Miho.”

“Huh? Who is she and what does she have to do with anything?”

“Like I said earlier… Miho is my counterpart; she is also an angel of death. She's so cute… and the perfect angel. Heaven's sweetheart.” Kyoko made a vomiting motion with her hands. “She sickens me. If you see Miho, you're going to heaven. If you see me, you're going to hell. So do you really want to go?”

“You said hell was fun earlier.” Hajime reminded her.

“Yes, because I'm half demon half angel. Humans such as yourself are treated even worse than animals. They get branded with hot iron and act as our slaves! That's what makes it so fun!” Kyoko giggled, like she was talking about her shopping trip or something.

“What did I do to deserve going to hell?” Hajime demanded. “I'm a good person! I did nothing wrong. Let me guess. I'm going because of what my parents did to Aki, Hiromi, and God knows who else families, right?! Everyone hates m-”

“Be quiet.” Kyoko covered Hajime's mouth with her hand. “‘ _ Everybody hates me and looks down on me because my parents are trash!’ _ That line may work on your friends, but not on me… it's in my nature to hate everyone, that's how we demons are.”

“But you said you're half!” Hajime shouted. This conversation was starting to take a toll on her and she was starting to feel dizzy. “So it's not in your nature!”

Kyoko ignored Hajime. “You have a weird concept of “good”, thinking that the only sin you've committed is being the supposed daughter of criminals. Maybe Miho would be standing here right now if you didn't give me this.” Kyoko held the pendant out, the diamond sparkling in the moonlight. When Hajime reached out to grab it, Kyoko snatched it back.

“Giving an angel stolen property is a one way ticket to hell.” Kyoko said matter-of-factly. “Not to mention, I heard you call me a bitch as you were getting off of the bus. I like holding grudges, so I'd make you my personal slave. I broke my old one.”

“Broke? Um… um… wait! You misheard! I didn't mean it… I'm…” Hajime, clearly flustered, let her voice trail off. She was done for. What was Kyoko doing to  _ break  _ someone? While Hajime didn't want to find out, she felt like she would, eventually. Kyoko made it sound like that was her destiny. But something wasn't making sense here… 

As Hajime thought about this situation some more, Kyoko took out her pocket mirror and began to admire herself in it. She was humming some song when Hajime decided to interrupt.

“Why did you come and warn me about my death?” 

Kyoko closed the mirror. “Because I like things that sparkle… things with value. Since you gave me this, I decided to break the rules. Weirdly enough, I actually like you. Since you're so young… it would suck if you died, right?”

“I guess…” Hajime sighed, thinking. She began to wonder if Kyoko could do more for her… after all, Kyoko didn't seem to have an issue with breaking the rules.

“I need to go.” Kyoko announced. 

“Wait.” Hajime reached out and grabbed Kyoko's wrist. “How much do you know about me?”

“More than enough. Your birthday is June 15th, you can write with both hands, grew up in an orphanage. You were the youngest until Hinako showed up, and she eventually became your “friend”. You used to cut glass for Yuzu, but didn't get along well with her assistant. Now that I think about it, you aren't very popular but you're very smart and good at pottery. Why?”

“So you know my past… my present… and my future…” Hajime sighed. “Couldn't you change that for me?”

“What?! No way.” Kyoko lowered her voice. “Do you know how much trouble I'd get into if I did something like that? Destiny is destiny and it must never be changed…”

“Aren’t you changing my destiny by warning me of my death? If I throw the space heater away, that changes my destiny, because that was meant to kill me… right?”

“Right…”

“So why can't you help me?” Hajime begged. “If you know everything about my life, you should know why I want to change things. You should know about the shitty situation I'm in… please Kyoko. Please save me!”

Kyoko shoved Hajime off of her, not even flinching as Hajime fell onto the pavement. “Humans are so desperate… and ungrateful. I save your life and you have the audacity to ask for more? I'm out of here.”

Kyoko disappeared, leaving Hajime on the roof alone.

_ I need to get her back here,  _ Hajime thought,  _ But how should I get her attention? She seems to be jealous of Miho for some reason. That's it! _ Feeling bold and rather spiteful, Hajime stood up and yelled out, “I bet Miho would do it for me, because she's a better angel than you!”

Hajime wasn't expecting a response, but she knew she was successful when she felt someone grab her hair. Surely enough, it was Kyoko, whose expression was dark.

“What did you say?”

“Get off of me!” Hajime slapped Kyoko's hand away. “You heard me! Miho would help me because she is a better angel than you.”

“That's not true! That's not true at all!”

“It's very true and you know it! What kind of angel is expelled from heaven? A really shitty one, that's what!”

“That wasn't my fault! If it wasn't for the fact that I was illegitimate, I'd be in Miho's position! I'm a better angel than  _ her _ , but no one acknowledges it because of who my parents are!”

“Oh yeah? So prove it! Help me out.” Hajime told her. “If you don't want to, I'll summon Miho and get her to do it for me…”

“Ha. You think she'll do such a thing? She's such a stickler for rules… all those angels are.”

“That doesn't stop you from wanting to be one.” Hajime said, backing Kyoko into the wall. “You'd do  _ anything _ if it means you'd be accepted by them… right? But you can't, because you're a bastard child… not even with another angel, but a  _ demon _ ! Isn't that horrible? You're a demon cosplaying as an angel… you’re nothing but a fraud! Absolutely pathetic!”

With Kyoko backed into a literal corner, she sighed, as if she were defeated. She was trying her best to appear unbothered by Hajime's words, but the way she was tearing up sold her out. “... I really hate you, Hajime. What is it that you want me to do for you?”

Hajime was elated. Her tactic was a success! “Fix everything with this debt I have to pay off. That's ruining everything for me. Do that and you'll be a real angel in my eyes.”

“Okay… okay. Sheesh. I can't change anything that's already happened, but I'll see what I can do.” Kyoko told her. “I just need you to do something.”

“Something like what?”

“Go to the park at 3 pm tomorrow… the one across the street from your high school. Be at the fountain. Can you do that?”

xxxxx

Just as Kyoko had said, Hajime found herself going to the park. Being at the park gave Hajime some nostalgia, as during the warmer months, Hajime and Hinako would lay out on blankets and hang out there after school. 

But those days were over. As much as Hajime didn't want to admit it, it seemed like Hinako was done with her. Hajime had no choice but to move on, as hard as that seemed. Things got even more confusing once you took in account that while Hajime was angry at Hinako, she still wished they were on good terms. How was Hinako able to just move on while Hajime struggled? Why couldn't they just be friends again?

Where did it all go wrong?

Hajime arrived at the fountain at 2:57, her anxiety at an all time high. Sure, Kyoko had said that she would help Hajime, but Hajime was now regretting using Kyoko's insecurity against her. After all, Hajime definitely wouldn't have liked it if someone tried manipulating her in that manner. Why wasn't she nicer?

But it was too late for regrets.

“Maybe someone is coming here.” Hajime said out loud. “That's it. Someone is coming to meet me. That has to be it.” 

“Ball!” a kid shouted. “Ball!!”

As she was too busy trying to figure out what was going to happen next, Hajime wasn't paying attention. A soccer ball went flying towards her, hitting her in the face. Hajime fell back into the fountain, knocked unconscious. What she couldn't see were the crowd of people who ran over to her, but she could've sworn she saw Kyoko standing over her, smirking.

“That's for calling me a bitch.”

xxxxx

A few hours later, Hajime woke up in a hospital bed. She had no idea what time it was, but the warm colors of the sun setting through the window said it all. Whatever had happened, she was knocked out cold. 

Not that Hajime was going to let that stop her. She hated hospitals, she hated the smell and how harsh the lights were. 

Another thing she wasn't looking forward to was the bill. She hadn't been too injured, so it couldn't have been too expensive - but Hajime didn't have it like that. 

She was going to sneak out.

Hajime jumped out of the bed, however, she stopped once she noticed the bandage on her forehead. Forgetting what she was supposed to be doing, Hajime walked over to the mirror and started to remove the bandages. She didn't get that far because the door to the bathroom opened, and a black haired woman walked out. She wasn't wearing scrubs, Hajime noticed.

“Stop! What are you doing?”

“Who are you?” Hajime demanded. “You aren't a nurse! Get out of here and go use the bathroom meant for the public!”

The woman sighed. “The way you talk… it's just like your father…” she began to tear up. “I can't believe it… it's really you.”

“What would you know about my father?” Hajime demanded. It was then that she realized something. Suddenly feeling livid, Hajime walked over to the woman, staring her down.

“Unlike you, I was raised with respect, so I'm not going to slap you like I want to. However… I don't want to see your face, so I'm going to ask you nicely. Leave and don't come back. Forget I exist.”

“Why are you talking to me like that? I can't just forget you exist, especially when you haven't existed to me for the last twenty years. I'm your mother, Hajime.”

“I know that.” Hajime said through her teeth. “You're nothing but a scammer… Sumi Fujiwara. Thanks to your actions, my life has been ruined before it started. If you have any shame, you'll find Aki and Hiromi and apologize to them.”

“Who are they?” Sumi asked. 

“Aki Yamato and Hiromi Seki? The daughters of your victims?” 

Sumi looked confused. “I've literally never heard of them… but I can tell you… I'm your mother.”

“I refuse to accept you as such. You're a criminal.”

Sumi shook her head. “Hajime.”

“Don't say my name!”

“Let me explain.” 

“There's nothing to explain. In fact… how do I know you're not setting me up? If you're my mother, I'm going to need proof. I'm going to need a DNA test.” Hajime told her. “Call in a nurse. Now.”

“Okay okay okay.” Sumi smiled. “Just don't go anywhere, okay? I got it.”

Sumi left the room and Hajime, feeling scammed herself, sat on the chair by the window, glaring at the view. Did Kyoko think she was funny by bringing them together? What kind of angel made someone's life worse? 

“What are you doing? DNA test? You watch too much TV.”

Speak of the literal devil, Kyoko was outside of the window, smiling at Hajime. Not wanting to see her, Hajime shut the blinds… only for Kyoko to materialize right in front of her.

“You said you wanted me to solve your problem. Why are you resisting?” Kyoko asked.

“The same reason why you thought it was a good idea to bring her here.” Hajime answered. “In all honesty, I want to kill her.”

“Well don't.” Kyoko laughed. 

“What's so funny? Clearly you know something that I don't, so why don't you tell me? Why is she lying about not being a scammer?”

“She's not lying.” Kyoko told her. “The scammers are named Sumi and Takeshi Fujiwara…”

“That's what Aki said.”

“And you're just going to trust her? Your parents are named Sumi and  _ Takashi _ Fujiwara. Before you say anything… your actual mother has different kanji in her name. That DNA test you're about to get is going to be a match and you're going to feel like a fool.”

“I'll believe it when I see it. But that doesn't explain why my parents were thought to be scammers?”

“Because they had a  _ son  _ named Hajime Fujiwara. Your name is really common.” Kyoko explained. “He was born in the same hospital as you… June 10th. However… he didn't live very long due to a congenital birth defect. The hospital made a mistake and gave you to the scammers… and told your actual parents their child died.”

“What the hell? Seriously?”

“Humans are idiots.” Kyoko sighed. “It wasn't until your parents dug deeper and learned that the deceased child was a son… and not a daughter as they were expecting. They sued the hospital and won, but at that point it was too late.”

“I… I can't believe this.”

“Believe it.” Kyoko smiled at Hajime. “Enjoy your new life. And just remember… I reunited you with your parents. Miho could never.”

“Wait!” Hajime shouted, but Kyoko did not wait. Instead, she disappeared.

“Who are you talking to?” Sumi asked. A nurse was behind her, and they both looked confused.

“No one.” Hajime lied. “As for this DNA test… let's do it.”

xxxxx

“99% match.”

Waiting for the results to come back was nerve-wracking, because Hajime truly believed that Kyoko had been lying to her. But now, seeing the results, Hajime felt as if a huge weight had been lifted off of her shoulders. While waiting for the results to come out, Hajime had gotten discharged. Sumi and Hajime had decided to meet at a restaurant that was near the hospital, where Sumi had decided to reveal the results.

“I knew it.” Sumi told her. “Now do you see? You're really my daughter. You're going to be the princess I always wanted…”

“Yes… I see…” Hajime nodded. “I can't believe it… I grew up thinking my parents were dead, and now…”

“You must've had it rough.” Sumi said. “Growing up in an orphanage must've been very hard.”

_ Not really, but she doesn't need to know that _ , Hajime thought. Trying to sound wounded, Hajime sniffled a bit.

“It was just as hard as you would imagine… the nuns were so mean. They'd hit me all the time… there was no money either, so it'd be hard at times.”

“Ah… my poor daughter.” Sumi frowned. “So where do you stay now?”

“Midori towers.” Hajime answered, and Sumi was appalled.

“Oh no. Oh no. Absolutely not. No daughter of mine will live in Midori Towers… that place is unlivable. If it is fine with you… I'd like to invite you to move in with me in Azabu.”

“Azabu?” 

“You know where that is, right?”

Hajime nodded, even though she felt like she was going to pass out. Azabu was the richest neighborhood in Tokyo! Kyoko wasn't kidding when she said Hajime's life would change.

“Yeah… I'm just… I wasn't expecting such a place.”

“I'm sure you'll be shocked.” Sumi smiled at Hajime. “But in a good way. Your life so far must've been pitiful.”

“You don't know the half of it.” Hajime muttered.

“So for that reason… I'm going to do whatever I can to make up for everything that happened. In other words… whatever you ask for… it's yours. Anything you want, I'll get it for you.”

“Okay… mom. If it's possible, I want a check for 15 billion yen. You don't have to give it to me all at once, but…”

“Of course I'm going to give it to you all at once.” Sumi smiled. “That's pocket change to me.”

“Pocket change?!”

“Oh Hajime… you have a lot to learn. Do you want to go shopping?”

xxxxx

“Ayame is going to kill me. I'm so scared.” 

“Ayame is not going to kill you. Maybe you misplaced it?”

“No… I knew where it was… but it disappeared after Hajime came over last week. That girl is…”

As it was a slow day at the department store, Hinako and Natalia had both gotten bored of trying to look busy and had started talking to each other. 

“How is she doing?” Natalia asked. “I haven't heard from her since… well, for a while now. I wonder if she's okay. I wish I remembered where she lived, so I could visit her. But then again, she works so much…”

“She lost her job.” Hinako announced solemnly. 

“Oh really? Well I'm sure she'll find something else. Hajime is that kind of person. She is resourceful and works hard.”

“Yeah…” Hinako sighed. She didn't want to say anything more about Hajime. “I'm going to run to the bathroom real quick.”

Before Natalia could say anything, Hinako ran off.  _ Did things get worse between them? Of course they did. I wonder if she knows about Tamami's post. Why can't we all get along? _

In the bathroom, Hinako was washing her hands, thinking to herself.  _ I've done enough… I should leave Hajime alone. I need to stop thinking about her… we aren't friends anymore. Her misfortune and bitterness will rub off on me and I'll never be a princess if I keep her around. She will drag me down. Especially with her new “job”. _

As Hinako was deep in thought, Saya walked into the bathroom. She had stopped by the Mizuki Department Store to place some items on layaway, and was expecting a quiet trip. But all of that was about to change, as she noticed Hinako staring in the mirror, looking spaced out. Saya should've ignored her, but after talking with Hajime, Saya decided that she wanted to try to understand Hinako more. So for that reason, Saya called out to her.

“Hinako?”

“Oh… hey Saya.” Hinako smiled at her. “How are you doing today?”

Saya did not return the smile. “We need to talk.”

“Not right now. I need to get back to work.”

“I don't care. I won't take up all of your time. Have you talked to Hajime lately?”

“No. Can people stop talking to me about her?” Hinako asked. “Why do they think I care?”

“Don't be like that… I know more than you think. You owe Hajime an apology… you don't have to agree with what she did but she did that to protect you…”

“You mean with the acceptance letter?”

“No… you know what I'm talking about. With Aki…”

“I don't care.” Hinako snapped. “That's her decision… I have nothing to do with it. That's her fault for being the daughter of scammers.”

“You say it like Hajime had a choice. You grew up in a good family, right? That's because you were lucky. You didn't choose… no one chooses who they were born to. Why can't you understand that?”

Hinako rolled her eyes. “Why can't you understand that Hajime is filth? Why can't you understand that I hate her? She looks down on me for wanting to be a princess but she's a prostitute? Come on.”

“Hajime is not a…” Saya was interrupted by sound of her phone ringing. From what Hinako could see, it was an unsaved number.

“Are you going to get that?”

Saya picked up the phone. “Hello…? Who is this? … Hajime? Where have you been? I haven't heard from you… it's kind of hard when I can't call you… oh! I can? You have a cell phone now? Congratulations!”

“How many men did you have to sleep with to be able to afford that cell phone?” Hinako asked loudly, and Saya shook her fist at Hinako, who gasped and ran out of the bathroom.

Meanwhile, back at the counter, 

“Hello Natalia!” 

With Hinako in the bathroom, Natalia decided to start sweeping the area behind the counter. However, she didn't get very far, because Tamami had skipped up. Seeing Tamami made Natalia want to scream, but she couldn't. That would get her into so much trouble!

“If it isn't Gossip Girl.” Natalia greeted. “Made any more messes on Facebook recently?”

“Don't call me that.” Tamami smiled. “I was only sharing important information…”

“You're sick. This is why no one trusts you.” Natalia told her. “This is why  _ I _ don't trust you.”

“Stop being so dramatic. I deleted the post.”

“Only because Ayame told you to, hours after everyone saw it. Word spreads fast. People take screenshots. What will you do when Hinako or Hajime find out?”

“Pfft… I'm not afraid of Hinako.” Tamami laughed. 

“And Hajime?”

“She will be fine. I actually saw her the other day… she seemed happy.”

“Did she?”

“Yeah… I was in a clothing store around here… taking back some of the pants I got because they were too long. Hajime is at the register, buying 50,000 yen worth of clothes.”

“What? Hajime?”

Tamami nodded. “I thought I was hallucinating. After all, she pulled out a platinum credit card  _ and  _ was carrying a Chanel bag. Chanel! I was gonna ask her who she robbed but she just smiled at me and said hi.”

“Are you sure that was Hajime?” Natalia asked unaware that Hinako had returned to the counter.

“Yes. The cashier complimented Hajime on her tennis bracelet… I saw real diamonds! And Hajime said that she got it from her mother.”

“Her mother?” Natalia repeated. “But…”

“Respectfully speaking, you're full of shit.” Hinako spoke up. “Hajime's mother is a scammer.”

“Hinako!”

“No.” Tamami shook her head. “You're wrong. There was a mistake or something… Hajime isn't an orphan! She never was. Her parents aren't scammers either. They seem to be honest people, yet super loaded.”

“Loaded meaning…”

“Rich.” Tamami clarified.

“No way.” Hinako was in disbelief. “That means she's not a…”

“A what?” Tamami asked, inching closer to Hinako.

“Nothing!”

“Well whatever happened must've been good, since Hajime seemingly went from peasant to princess overnight. What do you think, Hinako?”

Hinako didn't say anything. She felt like she had gotten slapped. 

Natalia smiled. “I'm happy for Hajime, money was such an issue for her... I hope to see her soon.”

“She'll probably pop up here eventually, trying to buy some perfume. And when she does…”

Hinako had heard enough. She snatched the broom away from Natalia and started sweeping the other side of the counter.

“What's gotten into her?” Tamami asked. Her tone was devious, which Natalia picked up on.

“Don’t worry about it. May I interest you in some perfume?”

xxxxx

“Here you go. A check for all the money my ‘parents’ owed you.”

“Where did you get this?”

“Don't worry about it.”

Later that evening, Hajime had invited Aki to the Milk and Honey Cafe. Aki, like everyone else that Hajime had called, had expressed her surprise that Hajime had a cell phone now - the latest iPhone. Sumi had bought it for her, but Hajime wasn't sure if she liked it. She felt lost, even after reading the instruction manual several times.

“Is it real?” Aki asked.

“Why don't you cash it in and find out?” Hajime asked. “You should be happy. Why are you acting nervous?”

“Because I don't want to be scammed. I know about the fake check scam…”

“You think I'd scam you?” Hajime laughed. “If anyone was scammed here, it was me. The Hajime Fujiwara you want to get money from… is dead. He's been dead for like… 20 years.”

“Stop messing around. It's your responsibility…”

“No. It's not my responsibility. It was never my responsibility. You know what? You should really humble yourself… I don't have to give you this, but you're still challenging me? If that's the case, I'll be going.”

“Okay. Fine. Whatever. Thank you for the money.” Aki told her. 

“It won't bring your parents back or undo the past… but… maybe you can now live a normal life.” Hajime said, sighing. “So what are you going to do?”

“That's none of your business. Just know I'm going to leave the country… I need to get away from all of this.” Aki smiled at Hajime. “Thank you.”

Hajime just nodded, not willing to return the smile. How could she smile at the girl who threatened to kill her multiple times? Aki noticed this and got up from the table - not even saying goodbye. 

Not that Hajime cared. She was just happy that Aki was gone and would leave her alone. She was finally free! Now Hajime could focus on the important things, like pottery, which she could now pursue thanks to her change in fortunes. So far she had made a vase, which Sumi used to display flowers in her bedroom. Hajime wasn't sure of what she was going to make next, but she thought about making Saya a bowl.

Saya, who'd said that she'd always be on Hajime's side, no matter what. Thinking about that made Hajime feel rather warm.

“Hajime…?”

Hajime's positive thinking was interrupted by someone calling out her name. Naturally, she looked around the cafe, wondering who it could be. Hajime didn't have to look too hard - she had gotten her answer.

It was Hinako.


	9. IX

IX

Seeing Hinako gave Hajime very conflicting emotions - on one hand, Hajime wanted to hug Hinako and start talking to her excitedly. But on the other hand, she couldn't just forget the things that Hinako had said and done. For that reason, Hajime wanted to throw her hot tea on her.

What was Hajime going to do? Hajime decided to base her reaction on whatever Hinako had to say. But  _ what _ did Hinako have to say? There was one way to find out.

“What do you want?” Hajime asked.

“I'm just surprised to see you here.” Hinako answered. Her voice was shaky, and Hajime found that empowering for some reason.

“Why? The men I sleep with are very rich.” 

Hinako appeared to turn blue. “I’m sorry.” she said quietly, looking at the ground and biting her lower lip. 

“What did you just say?” 

“I said I'm sorry.” Hinako apologized. “I'm really sorry for everything… I shouldn't have acted like a spoiled child and ruined my party. I shouldn't have gone to Aki and Yuzu. I shouldn't have threatened to go to the news either…”

“You're absolutely right. But what brought this change on?” Hajime asked. “You seemed to be very unapologetic…”

“The truth is… I was thinking about what happened the last time we talked… and that certain thing you said about princesses… it made me feel really bad.” Hinako frowned. “That sacrifice you made … I should be grateful… you didn't have to do that… Saya talked to me at work… the day you called her…”

“Ah… when you asked that off color question about my phone.” Hajime recalled. 

“I should've been patient and understanding…” Hinako continued. “Once again, I'm really sorry… I hope that you can find it in your heart to forgive me… I need to forgive you too… just because I didn't end up going to design school after high school doesn't mean I can't go at all… I'm sorry for holding that against you. I forgive you, Hajime. Please forgive me Hajime… please…” by now Hinako was sniffling and her eyes seemed glassier. It was obvious that she was about to cry, which Hajime never enjoyed seeing.

“Okay.” Hajime stood up from the table and smiled at Hinako, holding her hands in hers. “That's all I wanted to hear. I forgive you too.”

“I promise I won't make the same mistakes twice.” Hinako told her. “I need to grow up if I want to be a princess… acting like a kid isn't princesslike, is it?”

“Not at all.” Hajime answered. “Acceptance is the first step…”

“Yeah… um… you're absolutely right. I want to say congratulations to you too…”

“For what?” 

“I heard you aren't actually an orphan.” Hinako said, looking down. “And that your parents aren't scammers…”

“Yeah… Sumi works at Fujifilm as a marketing director

… and Takashi, I haven't met him yet, but Sumi always tells me he is a film director. He is currently making a movie in Hong Kong right now.”

“Are those your parents? Why don't you call them mom and dad?”

“I'm still getting used to them.” Hajime admitted. “Sumi dotes on me a lot. She gives me a lot of gifts…”

“Like that?” Hinako pointed to Hajime's Chanel purse.

“Yes… actually. She gave me a card too… and told me not to worry about anything when it comes to money. Do you know how refreshing that is? I don't have to work 6 days a week anymore… I have time to do what I want.”

“Like pottery?” Hinako guessed.

“Yes… I made Sumi a vase and I'm thinking of making Saya a bowl…”

“I want something too! We're best friends, right? So that means that we should give each other gifts… and we can do fun things together, like go to Roppongi Hills… or the Dream Tower! When should we go?”

“Hmm…” Hajime's demeanor had shifted from forgiving to frigid, but she didn't actually say anything.

“What is it? Was it something I said?” Hinako asked worriedly.

“Yes… actually.” Hajime admitted. “How do I put this… the stuff that you did… wasn't trivial.”

“What does that mean?”

“It means that the stuff you did was serious and it really hurt me… if you stopped after the party, I might be able to 'get over it’ easily… but you apologized… only to stab me in the back. As much as I want to believe that you're being genuine… I can't trust you right now…”

“I see… it's like when you hurt yourself. You need to give the wound some time to heal.”

“You get it. That's exactly what I'm saying…”

“But we're still best friends though… right? We can still talk, right?”

“I don't see why we can't talk. After all, we're still friends.”

“Best friends.” Hinako insisted. “We're best friends. Don't worry about the pendant either! I don't care about that… I'm just happy we're back together!”

Hajime covered her face with her hands. “Ah… don't speak like that.”

“I'm sorry! I'm just so happy. I'll give you all the time and space you need. But we should definitely exchange phone numbers. I'll write your name in hiragana, because I think it looks cuter that way! You should do the same.”

“Okay.” Hajime agreed. 

The two exchanged phone numbers, agreeing to save the contact entries in hiragana. When they were done, Hinako smiled at Hajime. 

“So what are you doing tomorrow? We should do something fun…”

“I'm making a bowl for Saya.” Hajime told Hinako.

“What about the day after that?”

“I'm going to give the bowl to Saya.” 

“What about after that?”

“Saya and I are going to Roppongi Hills. Um… Hinako, I get that you're excited that we're friends again, but… please… remember what we said about wounds and how they need time to heal.” 

“Of course! I was only asking because I was interested. You have fun with Saya, okay?”

“Okay.” Hajime smiled at Hinako. “I'll talk to you later.”

“Bye!”

As Hinako skipped off, Hajime smiled as she thought about what had just happened - Hinako had apologized to her! Not only that, but Hinako seemed to be very mature about the whole thing. Sure, Hajime still felt wary about opening herself back up to Hinako, but Hinako's apology seemed like it was going to lead them to a happy ending.

Or that's what Hajime hoped. What she did know was that if Hinako injured her pride again, Hinako's ending would be far from happy.

xxxxx

As much as Hinako wanted to go against Hajime's decision, she had to do the mature thing and respect her boundary. She couldn't make things worse; Hinako decided to lay low. However, it seemed that Hajime couldn't stay mad at Hinako for long. Three days after Hinako apologized, Hajime started sending Hinako “good morning” text messages with a smiling emoji. Hinako, feeling like she had to be careful, only responded to be polite. She didn't want to do too much and alienate Hajime any further. 

But such measures were unnecessary, Hinako soon found out. By the fifth day, Hajime and Hinako's relationship seemed to go back to how it was before Hinako's party, if Hajime's incessant messaging meant anything.

“Good morning Hinako. Do you have off today?” Hajime sent. Hajime seemed to be fond of emojis, Hinako observed. All of Hajime's sentences ended with a yellow heart.

“Good morning. Yes.” Hinako sent back.

“Would you like to come over today?” 

“Of course!”

Hajime sent the smiling emoji and yet another yellow heart, as well as an address. “Come by whenever you feel like it,” she had said. “Natalia is coming too.”

Hinako, who was bad at following directions, decided it would be best to go with Natalia. The two agreed to arrive at Hajime's house at 2.

At 2:00, Hinako and Natalia found themselves standing in front of the gate of a nice house, where ivy grew up the walls. Even though the house was only two stories, it looked bigger. What was also surprising was that from what Hinako and Natalia could see, Hajime's neighbors only drove expensive cars from foreign countries. All of the houses were gated off, with tall trees obscuring the view of some. Some were so grand, they could pass for castles! The two felt like they entered an alternate dimension.

“Are we sure this is the right address?” Hinako asked. “I'm worried.”

“It should be.” Natalia pointed to the front door, which they didn't have direct access to. “The name plate next to the door says Fujiwara.”

“Okay.” Hinako pressed a button that was on the gate. 

Seconds later, Hajime's voice came out the attached speaker.

“You guys are finally here!” she cheered. “I was waiting for you. I'll open the gate.”

Just as Hajime said, she opened the gate, and the two walked to the front door. Hinako had gotten distracted by a fountain in the garden - the centerpiece was a marble statue of a woman holding a pot of water. 

“Do you think Hajime made that?” Hinako asked.

“Um… I don't think so. That's marble, not clay.” Natalia answered. “Let's go.”

When the two reached the front door, Hajime opened it.

“That took longer than expected.” She observed.

“Sorry. Hinako got distracted by your fountain.” Natalia explained, then she smiled. “Your garden is actually really nice.”

“Thank you. I don't really have any investment towards it, but I think the fountain is cool. Anyway, let's go inside.”

The group walked into the house, in awe of everything. The foyer had marble floors, and with the high ceilings, Hinako and Natalia both felt like they had entered a magazine, not an actual house.

“I'm so glad you guys could make it.” Hajime told them. “Ah… this is what we got done last week.” she pointed to a family portrait on the wall. Hajime was sitting in the center and a woman who Hinako had seen at the department store was standing behind her, smiling. Next to the family portrait was another portrait of the woman with the man.

“It looks nice.” Natalia complimented. “But why do you have two?”

“Thank you. We have two because my dad is overseas right now and won't be coming back for a while. When he comes back we're going to get one with all of us together.”

“That's so cool… what do you think, Hinako?”

Hinako, who had spaced out since entering the house, nearly jumped when she heard Natalia, who seemed louder than usual.

“Um… I think… I think… everyone looks like they love each other. Everyone looks happy…”

“We are. Oh yeah. I want to give you something, Hinako.”

“You do?”

“Yes. That's why I invited you here. Let's go to my room.”

Hajime's bedroom was not only spacious, but very bright. Natural light filtered in through the windows - Hajime's bedroom could've been a studio apartment on it's own, that's how big it was. Hinako started looking around, going into Hajime's walk in closet. As Hinako was doing that, Hajime and Natalia just sat on the bed, talking.

“Do you ever get lonely in this big house?”

“Of course. That's why I invited you two over.” Hajime giggled. “I always have someone over if I can… it's usually Saya…”

“Saya? You two are pretty close now that I think about it. I'm glad that you two hit it off so well, even though the circumstances you met under were less than ideal… no thanks to…” Natalia motioned to the closet.

“She's being really quiet.” Hajime observed. “Even when I said I had something for her, she was quiet… that's really shocking.”

“She's definitely in shock by your house.” Natalia guessed. “This is probably the kind of thing she daydreams about.”

“I figured… it's just strange to me. When Hinako apologized to me, she was eager to come over and hang out…”

“She apologized?” Natalia's eyes doubled in size. “Hinako?!”

“Yes… I was surprised myself. She seemed sincere and all but…” Hajime lowered her voice to a whisper. “I'm not sure if I can trust her… or if I ever will be able to. The things she could've done… well it's shocking because Hinako is such an airhead. I would've never thought she could be so scheming…”

“Despite that, things seem to be going well, since you did invite her over.”

“Only because you're here.” Hajime admitted. “I don't feel comfortable being with her alone. A part of me is telling me that the timing of Hinako's apology is suspicious, but on the other hand, I just want things to go back to how they used to be. But with that said, … I feel uncomfortable whenever Hinako says she's my best friend now. Best friends wouldn't do what she did…”

“Well you seemed to move on.” Natalia pointed at a picture frame on Hajime's night stand.  _ Best friends _ , it read, but inside it was a picture of Hajime and Saya.

“No… I like Saya, but my feelings towards Hinako are… stronger. It's complicated.”

“I understand that.” Natalia nodded. “We should probably stop talking about her… she is technically still in the room.”

“You're right.”

“So… what have you been doing lately?”

Before Hajime could tell Natalia about her renewed interest in pottery, Hinako had walked out of the closet.

“You have such pretty clothes.” Hinako said,  _ They're fitting for a princess, even though you don't have many pretty dresses. _

“Thank you! Oh right… now that you're here… I can give you this!” Hajime jumped off the bed and ran out of the room. With her gone, Hinako found herself looking at the best friends picture by the bed. She wasn't able to form an opinion on it, because Hajime reappeared back in the room, holding a wrapped present.

“This is for you… to make up for what happened at your party. Happy belated birthday.”

Hinako slowly unwrapped the gift, which was a porcelain doll. Her honey colored hair fell in loose ringlets around her face, and her blue and pink dress and bonnet contrasted well with her hazel eyes. Hinako was stunned - she actually wanted to cry. Elizabeth had been her favorite doll, but now she had some competition.

“Hajime… thank you so much.” Hinako finally managed to say. “She's beautiful… I'll take really good care of her!”

“Wow… Did you get that from our store?” Natalia asked. “She looks really familiar.”

“Yes, actually...” Hajime smiled at Hinako. “So what are you going to name this one?”

Hinako appeared to be thinking. “Catherine! Her name is Catherine.”

“That's pretty. She looks like a Catherine too.” Natalia said.

“Yes. It's a good name for her.” Hajime agreed.

“I'm really happy, Hajime. I'm grateful… I don't deserve this…” Hinako sighed. “You always know what to do to make me happy… that's why you're my best friend…”

“Oh… about that. That was Saya's doing…”

“Saya? What does she have to do with anything?” Hinako asked.

“When we went to the store, she's the one who pointed it out and was like, ‘I think Hinako would like this’. I'm glad she was right!”

“Yeah…” Hinako agreed weakly. Her sentimental mood from earlier had been killed by this revelation “I'm happy too.”

“Oh right. Natalia! Do you want to see the stuff I made?”

“Sure!”

The two left the room, leaving Hinako to space out, hugging her new doll. While Hinako was happy over receiving a new doll as a late birthday present, her mood dampened once she noticed something. She set Catharine down on the bed, and then walked over to the picture of Hajime and Saya. Saya was making a peace sign while Hajime was hugging her… why was Hajime hugging her? Hinako didn't give herself time to answer the question. Instead, she slammed the frame down, so that the picture wasn't visible.

Saya had to go.

xxxxx

“Look at this… if you search “Hajime-chan” on Everyday Saya… you'll see 10 entries. That's not a lot considering how Saya only posts one or two blog entries a day.” 

Ever since Hinako received Catherine, she got the sinking feeling that Saya had replaced her, which would've been fine if Hajime's circumstances didn't change. But now that Hajime had a lot more money and access to things that Hinako had always wanted in on, Hinako had started to view Saya as competition.

Hinako also felt like Saya was replacing her in more ways than one… but Hinako needed a third party to weigh in. And as questionable as her choice was, that person was… Tamami.

The two were over Hinako's house, in her bedroom. Hinako watched as Tamami scrolled through something on her iPad. As always, Hinako left the investigating to Tamami, who had no issues using her mobile data for what she considered an “important matter”.

“Okay…” Hinako didn't know where Tamami was going with this.

“But as for Hajime?” Tamami shut the iPad off. “She posts so much about Saya it's ridiculous. She took so long to join us online … but only acts as a Saya fan page.”

“How does Saya react to the posts?”

“She just likes them.” Tamami reported. “Meanwhile if Saya talks about Hajime in a status update, Hajime becomes conversational… whatever is happening here, it's one sided.”

“No. Whatever is happening here… it needs to stop.” Hinako corrected. “I have nothing against Saya… but she's messing up my plan…”

“Your plan?” Tamami questioned. “Um… isn't your dream to be a princess or something along those lines? What is your plan and what does Saya have to do with it?”

“She's in the way. You see, when we were younger, Hajime would do anything for me. If I wanted something she'd always get it.”

“Ah… she spoiled you.”

“Don't use such language.” Hinako appeared to be embarrassed. “Whatever the case was, Hajime claimed she was like that because we were best friends. I apologized to her because I wanted her to regard me like that again. I want her to get me things.”

“It looks like you were successful. Where did you get Cathy from?”

“Her name is Catherine! And Hajime gave me to her the other day. The only issue is… Hajime was with Saya that day… Saya picked her out. I thought that it was Hajime's doing - I thought I had achieved my goal. But no. We aren't best friends anymore… she's always with Saya and I feel forgotten.”

“Do you seriously think that Hajime is over you?” Tamami giggled. “Do you think that you can be replaced?”

“Why wouldn't I be?”

“I'm going to tell you this straight up. Hajime will never be able to replace you, because she has feelings for you. When you love someone, it's very hard to let them go.”

“Eh? Tamami? Don't say things like that. I know you like gossiping and spreading rumors but you're going too far with this one.”

“You see nothing wrong with wanting to go on TV and tell everyone about Hajime's supposed secret, but it's wrong for me to tell you about the obvious?” Tamami asked. “What the fuck?”

“Don't swear at me.” Hinako said through her teeth. “I don't think Hajime likes me… I personally think she likes Saya. But Hajime seems to be leading me on… she loves sending me yellow hearts. I thought that was her signature, but…”

“You mean like over text messages? Yeah. She doesn't do that for me. She doesn't do that for Natalia either. As for Ayame, she thinks Hajime blocked her number. I wonder if Hajime does it for Saya?”

“Maybe… when Natalia and I went to her house, that's all Hajime could talk about. Look at her online behavior. Hajime definitely has a crush on her.. Saya this, Saya that. I need to get rid of her. Once I do… I'll have a bunch of pretty things.”

Tamami shook her head. “You don't need to go that far. Trust me. Whatever Hajime feels towards Saya is  _ nothing _ compared to what she feels for you. So take advantage of that while you can, okay?”

“Okay…” Hinako nodded, then she realized something. “Tamami, you speak as if you've been in love before. Have you?”

“Whether I did or I didn't… it doesn't matter. I don't waste my time on those kind of feelings...” Tamami answered. “I just pick up on things… especially thanks to the people around my mom. They taught me well.”

“Ah… I think this is the first time you talked about your mom to me. Now that I think about it…” Hinako appeared to be thinking. “Everyone else talks about their families - in my case, that'd be Hajime - but you don't. Why not?”

“Why not?” Tamami smiled, but the way her mouth was twitching made it clear that she didn't feel like smiling at all. “Because there's nothing to talk about. Now can we please change the subject?”

xxxxx

Despite Tamami's reputation as a messy gossip, Hinako was surprised to see that there was some truth in what she was saying. After maintaining daily messages with Hajime for a few days, Hinako finally got her wish granted.

“Hey Hinako. Let's go to Roppongi Hills on Sunday.” Of course there were yellow hearts punctuating the end of every sentence, so Hinako decided to show her excitement in the same way.

“Of course! It's a date!” Hinako responded, and then sent a string of blue hearts. 

It took quite a while for Hajime to respond, but when she did, she sent a smiling face and yet another yellow heart.

Score!

The rest of the week went by quickly. On Sunday, Hinako found herself exactly where she wanted to be - in one of the numerous settings of her day dreams. Despite the name, Roppongi Hills was a complex that served as a city within a city - the buildings contained offices, apartments, shops, restaurants, a hotel, art museum, a walk through garden and an observation deck. Hinako only really cared about one thing though… the stores. Even then, Hinako didn't know where to start, considering how she had six floors of stores to choose from. Luckily, there was Hajime.

“When I came here before, I saw this store and immediately thought of you.” Hajime told Hinako.

Hinako could barely speak. The store that Hajime brought her to was a formalwear store that only specialized in jewelry and fancy dresses. Just seeing all the sparkling jewels and colorful gowns was enough to make Hinako's throat dry up.

Was this real life?

“How do you like it?” Hajime asked.

“I don't like it.” Hinako said finally. “I love it! I used to think that this place only existed in my dreams… but it's real!” Hinako ran over to a pink dress and hugged it protectively. “I can't believe…”

“I'm glad you like it.”

“I don't even care that I can't afford anything… just being here makes me so happy!” Hinako admitted.

“You can still try things on, you know.” Hajime reminded her.

“I can? I'm allowed? Oh my God! Grab everything you can in my size!”

“Everything?”

“Yes!” Hinako then ran into the fitting room, leaving Hajime to try not to be too embarrassed as the shop attendants tried to make sense out of Hinako's behavior.

For the next two and a half hours, Hinako would try on a dress, then Hajime would take a picture of Hinako in the dress. As they were doing this, the two would laugh and talk - as if they never got into an argument in the first place! This repeated until Hinako finally came out of the fitting room, wearing her regular clothes and yawning.

“I'm so tired.” Hinako observed. “But it was so fun…”

“Yeah, it really was.” Hajime smiled. “I'm glad you enjoyed yourself!”

“One day I'll be able to afford all of this… I want my closet to look like this.” Hinako walked over to the jewelry cabinet and stared at jewelry inside. “Ooh… wait! That's your tennis bracelet, isn't it?”

Hajime walked over, staring at her bracelet and comparing it to the one in the case. “It looks similar. I think this is the same. Hey, I know.”

“What?”

“Excuse me!” Hajime called out to a shop attendant, who began to walk over.

“Um… what are you doing?” Hinako asked.

Hajime ignored Hinako, and she pointed to the bracelet. “I'd like to buy this please.”

“Of course. I'll have it wrapped up for you. Wait here.”

The shop attendant removed the bracelet from the cabinet and then walked over to the register. Hajime began to follow her, but Hinako was faster. She grabbed Hajime's wrist, her expression one of disbelief.

“I said… what are you doing?”

“Don't you want a matching bracelet?” Hajime asked, smiling. 

“It would be nice…” Hinako admitted.

“Exactly. It would be. This sounds really juvenile, but I've always wanted to have friendship bracelets with someone… you.”

“Aww… Hajime.”

“You're that important to me!” Hajime cheered, going towards the register.

Back at the jewelry counter, Hinako was besides herself. However, contrary to what Hajime believed, Hinako was happier over the gift itself, not what Hajime was saying.

After all, a diamond bracelet was fitting for a princess, right? However, that wasn't enough to satisfy Hinako. She needed to keep going.

xxxxx

“Happy birthday, Hajime!” 

On June 15th, Hajime woke up to her phone ringing. She laid there for about ten seconds, wondering  _ what on Earth is that vibrating noise?,  _ before realizing that it was her phone, and that it was her birthday. Without seeing who it was, Hajime picked up the phone. She was expecting Hinako, but it was Saya.

“Thank you.” Hajime said, trying to hide her disappointment. 

“How old are you now? Twenty, right? That's an important number.” Saya said. “Because that means you've reached the age of majority.”

“Really?”

“Yes. So are you going to do something special today? I saw something you might be interested in - the art museum is holding a pottery exhibit.”

“Seriously?” 

“Do you want to go?”

Hajime hesitated. She could hear Saya's excitement over the phone, which made what she was about to do even harder.

“I'm sorry Saya. As much as I really want to… I have something planned for today.”

“With your mother? That's understandable.”

“No… not with Sumi. She's on a business trip but when she comes back… as for today, Hinako and I are going to a fancy hotel. Kiryu Palace.”

“Kiryu Palace? Tsukasa's aunt runs that place… Remember her? She was at the party… either way, that hotel is really nice. I hope you two have fun…”

“Me too. You know Hinako suggested that. She always wanted to stay there.”

Saya was silent for a few minutes, before responding. “Hajime, don't take this the wrong way or anything, but… today is your birthday, not Hinako's. Hinako should be doing something you want to do… not the opposite.”

“I know it seems weird… but what can Hinako do? Compared to me she has no money…”

“She can do the same things she used to do before everything changed… it'd be one thing if it was Hinako's birthday, but… actually…”

“Actually…?”

“I saw Hinako at the department store and all she could talk about was the things you got her and your trip to Roppongi Hills.”

“She's excited. So what?”

“I don't think she's excited. I actually think she's using you.”

Hajime laughed derisively. “You think Hinako is capable of using someone? You think she'd use me?”

“It's not too unlikely.”

“Actually it is. Hinako said she talked with you and that lead her into realizing that she was in the wrong… and she apologized to me. It was sincere.”

“Um… I hate to tell you this, but Hinako and I didn't really talk. The last time I talked to her was in the bathroom at the department store… she wasn't really open to hearing what I had to say. It wasn't even a conversation in all honesty - before I could say anything, you called and you know what happened next.”

“Maybe she woke up on her own. Hinako is capable of self reflection, even though it doesn't seem like it. Either way, we are friends now. She isn't using me.” Hajime insisted.

“Okay… just please be careful, okay?”

“Whatever. Is it that weird to accept that someone likes me?”

Before Saya could ask Hajime what the hell she was talking about, Hajime hung up the phone. She was not expecting that kind of message from Saya on her birthday.

_ I bet she's jealous of Hinako and I's relationship. She probably wishes she was invited along too. Well, too bad! _

Hajime spent the rest of the morning responding to the messages she got from her friends. After Saya came Natalia, then Tamami, then Ayame. Hajime responded to them all, except for Ayame, who started calling her for some reason. Ayame could go unanswered, Hajime figured. She didn't really care about whatever Ayame had to say, so Hajime kept rejecting the call until Ayame gave up. She even ignored Ayame's subsequent voicemail.

After waiting for a few hours, Hinako  _ finally  _ wished Hajime a happy birthday, but the message that came afterwards was truly unexpected.

“I know we said we would meet at the hotel at 2, but Nanami got food poisoning last night so I have to cover her shift… I won't be able to come there until 6. I'm sorry!”

“It's fine.” Hajime replied back. “Shit happens. I'm sure I'll find something else to do while I wait!”

“Yay! I love how understanding you are!”

xxxxx

While Hajime was understanding of Hinako's situation, she did find it hard to find something to do. She had gotten the hotel room and while Hajime was blown away by how elegant it was, her moment of awe only lasted for a few minutes. She'd probably be more excited if Hinako were here…

Hajime decided that she could spend her time exploring - this way, when Hinako did arrive, she could tell her all about the cool things she saw. There was only one problem, the hotel was huge - it spanned 41 floors. Hajime didn't feel like exploring all of that on her own, so she turned the TV on to the hotel info channel, which was more or less a slideshow set to smooth jazz.

After going through 3 slides on the hotel amenities, Hajime finally found something interesting - there was an infinity pool on the 41st floor, which offered a stunning view of the city below. Hajime had to see this for herself, and since Hinako couldn't swim, Hajime figured that now was the perfect time to go swimming. She didn't have to worry about excluding Hinako, since Hinako was busy working.

xxxxx

Hajime spent the next two hours either doing one of three things - doing laps in the pool, staring out at the view, or just floating on her back and relaxing. Considering how Hajime basically had the pool to herself, she found it  _ very  _ relaxing. As Hajime left her phone in the hotel room, she didn't know the exact time, but she figured it was close to 6. The sun seemed to move a bit closer to the west, Hajime noticed. Hinako should definitely be arriving soon, if she wasn't in the room already.

Hajime jumped out of the pool and went into the changing room. She was sitting on a bench on the far edge of the room, drying her hair with a towel, when the door to the room opened violently.

“Hey! Don't be so rough!”

Hajime stopped drying her hair. Time seemed to slow down as she realized that whoever it was, sounded  _ very _ similar to Hinako.

On the other side of the locker room, Ayame was staring Hinako down so hard that Hinako felt like she was going to melt. Tsukasa and Seira ran in afterwards, masking their excitement with concern. They both believed that a fight was about to break out. Of course, if it came down to it, they were on Ayame's side. Sure they both treated Hinako nicely when she was at work, but that was because they both were above treating retail employees, even delusional ones such as Hinako, like shit. They went to Hinako's party out of politeness, even though they didn't really like her.

Why would they?

“You shouldn't be here right now.” Ayame told Hinako. “I don't even know why you're here in the first place…”

“I overheard Seira and Tsukasa talking about it.” Hinako explained. “So I decided to come hang out with you guys.”

“That doesn't mean you invite yourself!” Tsukasa snapped. “Do you realize how rude that is?”

“Even though it's Hajime's birthday… and you agreed to hang out with her, you're here with us. It's almost 7 o'clock. Who knows what Hajime is doing right now, besides waiting for you!” Ayame continued. 

“She'll be fine… Hajime is so easy.” Hinako held out her wrist. “Look. She got me this because she thinks we're friends.”

“Holy shit.” Seira gasped. “How much did that cost?”

“More than my rent for a year.” Hinako answered. “The point is, Hajime is easy to deal with.”

“No. It looks like she's easy to use.” Tsukasa corrected. “You're using her.”

Hinako shrugged. “Sure. Whatever you say. As for you, Ayame, why do you care? You hate Hajime.”

“For the millionth time, I don't hate Hajime. I've never hated Hajime.”

“But she hates you. Did you tell her happy birthday? I bet she ignored you.”

“I tried calling her to snitch on your ass but she didn't pick up the phone. You're so transparent - changing your attitude as soon as she gets some money. You wanted to expose her on TV, remember…?”

“I'm so glad I didn't…” Hinako admitted. “If I did, I probably wouldn't have gotten to go to Roppongi Hills!”

“Damn… you really hate this girl.” Tsukasa observed.

“Of course I do. If it wasn't for her I'd be a design student, not working at Mizuki, selling perfume.” Hinako mused. 

“Oh do you think you're above that?” Seira asked, her eyes narrow.

“Yes. I mean… it's not very princesslike, don't you agree? I could be making my own pretty dresses if it weren't for…”

“You need to let that go. Grow up, Hinako. Even though Hajime dislikes me for no reason, I'm still going to be the bigger person. You should do the same and stop.” Ayame advised.

“You say that but told everyone she has lice.”

“She has lice?” Seira looked concerned. 

“Oh of course she has lice.” Hinako smiled. She'd do anything to fit in with Seira and Tsukasa. “It's a chronic issue with her. Those are her only friends. Oh. Do you guys want to hear a secret? Come in close.”

Hinako lowered her voice to a whisper and whispered something to the three. When she was done, Ayame looked haunted, Seira was giggling and Tsukasa looked thoroughly annoyed.

“So… you think she likes you?” Seira asked. The thought of  _ anyone _ being in love with someone as unlikeable as Hinako was hilarious to her. This had to be one of Hinako's delusions. Even though Seira was laughing  _ at _ her and not  _ with _ her, Hinako took Seira's laughter as empowering.

“No.” Hinako stared at her fingernails. “I know she likes me.”

Seira laughed even harder. “Do you know anything? You can't break change without the help of a register!”

“That's irrelevant. I know what I'm talking about. Tamami told me thi-”

“Tamami?  _ TAMAMI _ ?” Seira was now tearing up. “That's enough, that's enough… stop it before you kill me, Hinako!”

“Whether you heard it from Tamami or Jesus Christ, you shouldn't out Hajime like that.” Tsukasa snapped. “Tamami though? Rats stick together, I guess.”

“Who are you calling a rat?” Hinako challenged.

“So would you ever date her?” Ayame asked, speaking before Tsukasa could answer. “The answer better be no.”

“Honestly… I would. I'd get so much... if we were girlfriends. I could finally become a princess.” Hinako smiled, looking very proud of herself.

“If I wasn't a public figure, I'd slap the shit out of you.” Ayame hissed. “Hajime deserves better.”

“Hajime doesn't deserve shit, and you know this. You're agreeing with me but you're pretending to be mature. It's sad.” Hinako muttered. “She’s the daughter of scammers and suddenly gets reconnected with her parents who probably scammed their way to the top. Not to mention she is a prostitute so if her parents scammed their way to the top, she slept her way to the top. Why are you caping for someone with such a dirty character?”

There was an awkward silence as Ayame, Tsukasa and Seira took in this information. 

“You really need to learn the meaning of respect.” Tsukasa spoke up. 

Hinako laughed bitterly. “You think I'd ever respect her? I don't care if her parents were the king and queen of Japan. I'll never respect Hajime. Never. She's nothing to me.”

No one knew what to say, as they all felt bad, so Hinako continued.

“Either way, her becoming rich like this is… questionable. But I'm going to make the most of it.”

“By taking advantage of her.” Seira inferred.

Hinako shrugged. “Call it what you want. It's not my fault that Hajime is dumb.”

“Okay. That's enough about Hajime.” Tsukasa said. Unbeknownst to everyone else, Tsukasa was making moves in her head to ban Hinako from the hotel. 

“Right…  the atmosphere is so dirty now. Let's go swimming.” Ayame agreed. 

“You're the one who brought up Hajime.” Hinako smiled, then she walked out of the room.

“What a bitch. She wants to talk about what's a dirty character when her character is the dirtiest of them all. I want to push her in the deep end and watch her suffer.” Seira snapped, she began to walk out of the room, but Tsukasa stopped her.

“Guys. Let's try to have some fun even despite our uninvited guest.” she said. “That means… don't try to drown Hinako, okay?”

“I mean, the temptation is there.” Ayame said.

“It sure is. But don't worry. After tonight I'll be making some calls to ensure that Hinako is never allowed back on the premises.”

“But what about Hajime?” Seira asked. “We got off on the wrong foot and I'm pretty sure she doesn't like me, since I called her a clown and all, but…”

“What about Hajime?” Ayame asked.

“Shouldn't we tell her about Hinako?”

“Hmm…” Tsukasa appeared to be thinking. “Ayame knows Hajime the best… what does she think?”

“I think…” Ayame's voice trailed off. She  _ could've _ advocated for telling Hajime straight up, but it was very likely that Hajime would think that Ayame was lying and then get mad at  _ her _ . Hinako would once again, get off super easy. So for that reason…

“I think… I think that we should just say nothing for now. Let's keep it secret.” 

Seira and Tsukasa nodded in agreement, and the group left the room. They had no idea that Hajime was still sitting on the bench, gripping her towel and trying her hardest not to start sobbing uncontrollably.

Things with Hinako were about to be a little different. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> CONFESSION: Never in my life have I wanted to slap a character as much as I wanted to slap Hinako - I thought writing Yuka was fun (she's my favorite in tddup even though Noriko is actually THE best girl) and I didn't really feel anything towards Aiko. But Hinako??? Rereading that part at the end made me want to break my iPad. Poor Hajime...


	10. X

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Valentine's Day! I hope your relationships are happy and healthy and NOTHING like Hajime and Hinako's!

X

_Best friends forever. Friends to the end. Everything is a lie. ‘Once again, I'm really sorry… I hope that you can find it in your heart to forgive me…’, ‘I promise I won't make the same mistakes twice.’, She's a liar. Everything is a lie. I should've known better. 'I'm so happy we're friends’, ‘I’ll never respect Hajime. Never. She’s nothing to me.’..._

Twenty four hours ago, Hajime wouldn't have thought that she'd be spending her birthday alone, drinking wine and staring down at the city below. She thought she and Hinako would be having fun, but it was almost 9 pm and Hinako was still nowhere to be found.

But at this point, did Hajime want Hinako to show up? After witnessing Hinako's confession, Hajime had been too shocked to leave the locker room. She sat there for 20 minutes before going back to the room and crying some more.

A half an hour later, Hajime's eyes had swollen up and she had a terrible headache. She took a nap for an hour, which fixed her headache but she was still mentally broken.

Very mentally broken.

Hajime was staring at the bottom of the glass, focusing on the reddish liquid. The wine was nasty and made her throat hurt, and the glass itself was huge. At least it was well made… and the wine was a gift. It was complimentary, which caused Hajime to wonder if this was Tsukasa's doing. Despite having a high alcohol tolerance, Hajime didn't exactly like the taste of it. But there was nothing else she could do. Maybe she'd celebrate her 20th birthday by being self destructive and getting drunk for the first time… Hajime wanted to forget everything.

_I'll never respect Hajime._

Hajime took another sip of the wine, wondering if she should reach out to Saya. She decided against it, because she could imagine Saya telling her, “I told you so. You should've came to the art museum with me.” Hajime didn't want to burden Natalia with it, and talking about this with Ayame and Tamami was off the table. One would end up telling the other, and things would get messy. Well, they'd get _messier_.

Hajime could get through this alone. She didn't have a choice.

“Happy birthday to me…” Hajime said out loud, feeling very pathetic. She could feel another round of tears coming on, but those dried up as soon as she heard the sound of a card key being inserted into the door.

“Happy birthday!”

Hinako walked in, smiling and holding a box. She was also holding several balloons.

“Thank you.” Hajime said, not even looking up from her wine. Hajime was definitely not about to cry in front of Hinako. She had to act as normal as she possibly could.

“Are you okay? Your eyes are pretty swollen.” Hinako set her things down and sat on the bed nearest to Hajime.

“It must be the wine.” Hajime said dryly.

Hinako nodded. “Yes… that makes sense. It makes my face redden…” Hinako's voice trailed off as she noticed that there was only half of the wine left. “Are you… um… drunk?”

“No.” Hajime answered. “Not at all…”

“Okay good. Because if it were me… it would be messy right  now. Remember when I threw up on Ayame? I'm so glad you helped me clean up...” Hinako giggled, and then she caught sight of the sparkling city below them. “Wow… this view is so amazing. As expected from the 34th floor. This is the kind of thing that can only be enjoyed with friends.”

“I have been enjoying it alone for the last three hours.” Hajime said, gripping her wine glass. “Thank you for finally showing up. I was worried.”

“I'm so sorry. I had to close.” Hinako told her.

 _Another lie_ . Hajime thought. _Mizuki Department Store closes at ten… it's nine right now._

“I'll make it up to you.” Hinako put her arms around Hajime. “I can't believe you're an actual adult now… you're drinking wine.” Hinako started giggling. “You're so classy.”

“Yeah… at least one of us is. Why is your hair wet?”

“I went home and took a shower.” Hinako answered.

“Your shower seems to be broken. You smell like chlorine. It's almost like you went swimming.”

“I can't swim.” Hinako reminded her. “The shower must've broke… this is concerning…”

“Yes. You should get that fixed.” Hajime stood up. “I don't know what we can do…”

“We can go to the rooftop deck.” Hinako suggested. “It's really warm outside.”

 _You would know._ “Okay. Let's do it.”

Ten minutes later, the two were on the rooftop deck. One half of the deck was a bar, which was moderately crowded, while the other side was filled with patio chairs. Hajime sat down in one of the chairs, watching as Hinako walked towards the edge and started praying for whatever reason. Hinako had left the box with Hajime.

 _I wish Kyoko would appear and push her off. I wish I could summon her_ , Hajime thought. They were so high up, it'd be instant death, she figured.

“It's so beautiful.” Hinako said as she walked back over. “And it's so quiet up here…”

“What were you praying for?”

“For my dreams to come true.” Hinako started giggling. She sat down next to Hajime. “Are you ready to see what I got you? Close your eyes and don't open them until I say so, okay?”

Hajime closed her eyes, thinking that whatever Hinako had for her couldn't be too bad. However, that changed when Hinako told Hajime to open her eyes… and Hajime saw that Hinako had brought her a small New York style cheesecake.

“Happy birthday!” Hinako cheered. “Make a wish! Make a wish!”

“I…” Hajime didn't know what to say. “You… you brought me cheesecake…”

“Yes. It's so cute, isn't it?” Hinako looked very happy despite the fact that Hajime seemed to be turning green. “Let's share it and enjoy the moment.”

Hinako cut herself and Hajime a slice and as Hinako started enjoying her favorite dessert, Hajime cut her cheesecake into super small pieces and then started smashing her spoon into it, spacing out.

“Hajime, aren't you a bit too old to be playing with your food?” Hinako asked gently. She really had no idea why Hajime was acting so strange. Normally the roles would be reversed, Hinako would be the one playing with her food and Hajime would be the one doing the scolding.

“Oh… sorry.” Hajime slowly ate her cheesecake. “Thanks Hinako.”

“I'm glad you appreciate it.” Hinako smiled.

“Excuse me.” Hajime stood up and took her trash to the nearest trash bin, which was near the bar area. The trip was meant to be uneventful, but Hajime's stomach, wine and all, thought differently.

“Oh, gross!”

“Oh my God!”

Hinako, who had been daydreaming as she ate her cheesecake, had to stop once she heard the disgusted shouting of the other guests. She decided to leave her delusions alone, and walk over… only to see that Hajime had thrown up onto the deck.

Feeling embarrassed, Hinako couldn't bring herself to do anything. Throwing up in public? How unprincesslike! Hinako couldn't stand it, so she slipped back to her chair, daydreaming as Hajime dealt with it on her own.

xxxxx

“Are you feeling better?” Hinako asked.

Back in the room, Hajime was in the bathroom, brushing her teeth. While Hajime was cleaning herself up, Hinako had turned on the TV and started watching Cinderella on Disney Channel. During a commercial break, Hinako decided to check on her friend.

Hajime, who had just finished rinsing her mouth out, nodded. “I'm doing fine. It's been such a long time since I had cheesecake…”

“I'm sorry.” Hinako apologized. “I should've known better…”

Hajime nodded, not saying anything. It was very hard to tell if Hinako had did this on purpose or if the airheaded girl really did forget that Hajime had a negative complex towards cheesecake. Either way, Hajime did notice Hinako completely ignoring her.

“I'll make it up to you.” Hinako told her.

“No… that's unnecessary.” Hajime said quickly. “I'm tired. I want to go to sleep…”

“We can… after Cinderella goes off! Let's watch it together!”

There was nothing Hajime could do. Hinako's favorite movie was Cinderella, even though she had seen it nearly a half a billion times. Hajime had liked it when she was younger, but that changed after Hinako started throwing tantrums to get control over the DVD player during movie time. _Everyone_ at Sacred Heart quickly grew tired of Cinderella, including the nuns. They eventually got Hinako a portable DVD player, but at that point, the damage had been done. Especially with Hajime, who shared a room with her!

Hajime ended up falling asleep during the encounter with the fairy godmother, as she was that tired. This was by far, the worst birthday of her life. All Hajime wanted was for the day to be over.

Not so fast.

Hajime had been sleeping for a few hours when she woke up to the sound of soft crying, coming from the bathroom. Of course, it was Hinako. Even though Hajime was super upset with her, she found herself knocking on the door. Hinako opened it, her wet face confirming everything.

“What's wrong?” Hajime asked, not bothering to show any emotion.

“My mom… I had a dream about her...” Hinako's voice trailed off. “I wanted to save her… I wanted to save her but she told me there's nothing I could do… she threw a lighter at me and I caught on fire, she said I deserved it. That I should've died. But she is right... there is nothing I can do… I'm trash…”

 _You're absolutely right about that,_ Hajime wanted to say. Instead, she just sighed. “You did what you could. You were only eight. Don't be too hard on yourself. I'm sure your parents wouldn't want that.”

“I miss my mom…” Hinako's voice trailed off. “I just want her to hug me just once… I want to hear her voice again... even for a second…”

Hajime didn't say anything. She didn't have the mental energy to offer comfort to Hinako right now.

“I'm sorry.” Hajime said in a flat tone. “I'm going to go back to sleep.”

“Wait…” Hinako smiled nervously. “Can… I sleep with you?”

“Do what you want.” Hajime went back into her bed and shut her eyes. A few minutes later, Hinako got in next to her. Hajime felt super conflicted as Hinako latched onto her arm.

“I really appreciate how safe you make me feel…” Hinako said. “I love you, Hajime. I love you soooo much.”

Hajime knew better than to take the bait, yet her heart was betraying her. Hajime was grateful that the lights were out, because she was definitely blushing. Luckily… Hinako didn't say much after that - she fell back asleep fairly quickly. As for Hajime, she noticed Hinako's tennis bracelet - Hinako's was rose gold while Hajime's was gold. As discreetly as she could, she removed Hinako's bracelet from her wrist, and swapped it with hers.

Once she was done, Hajime got up and stared out at the city, which was still alive and glittering despite it being three am. Her brain told her to get in the bed that Hinako vacated, but her heart…

No, screw her heart. Hajime stared at Hinako, who was sleeping - her expression looked very innocent, as innocent as it could be, considering how Hinako truly felt about her. _I'll never respect Hajime._ She had to do better.

“Enjoy it while it lasts.” Hajime muttered as she got into the empty bed.

She was going to ruin her.

xxxxx

A few days later, Hajime was ready to strike. She found herself in Hinako's bedroom, watching carefully as Hinako smiled at the rose gold bracelet on her wrist.

“I'm so glad that you caught that. I would've never noticed that we accidentally swapped bracelets.” Hinako told her.

“Yes… I was wondering why my bracelet looked so pink. Then I realized…” Hajime motioned towards her bag, which was closer to Hinako. “Can you pass that to me?”

Hinako nodded, although she seemed to be shocked by the weight of the bag. “It seems a bit heavy…”

“I have a lot of things in there. I need to clean out my purse…”

“You should stay a while and do it here.” Hinako smiled. “There's something I want to show you that I took a picture of.”

“Hm? What is it?”

“It's a pretty sundress, but a tad expensive…” Hinako gave Hajime that puppy eyed look, but Hajime knew better. Hinako was truly shameless!

“You want me to buy it for you?” she asked.

“It would be nice… but I wanted to get your opinion on it. I was going to get Natalia's opinion on it too, since she is coming over as well.”

“Natalia…” Hajime sighed. She was not expecting for Natalia to show up, but that wasn't going to stop her.

“Yes. I tried getting Tamami and Ayame to come but Ayame made it seem like she didn't want to be around Tamami. However, Tamami decided not to come at the last minute… she said she has something to prepare for. I told Ayame that and she still didn't want to come.”

“What about Saya? Is she coming?”

Hinako shook her head. “Why would I invite her into my home?”

“Your call.” Hajime shrugged, then the doorbell rang.

“Natalia!” Hinako cheered, running towards the door.

With Hajime in the room alone, she walked over to Hinako's dresser. Hinako kept her dresser neat, so it was easy to find what she was looking for - the sole item from Hinako's old life. It was a small photograph of an eight year old Hinako and her mother, taken in a rose garden. It was Hinako's most prized possession, but Hajime didn't care. She removed the picture from the frame and placed it into her wallet.

That wasn't what Hajime came here for though. She walked over to Hinako's dolls, which all sat on a shelf. She stared at their eyes, their hair and their faces, as well as the details on their clothes. The dolls appeared to be well made, and Hinako took care of them like they were her own children.

Those days were about to be over.

Hajime dug around in her purse and pulled out a hammer, which she had purchased just for this occasion. Without thinking much of it, Hajime swung the hammer into Catherine's face, feeling very happy as the doll's face crumbled into pieces. But she didn't have time to assess the damage - she had to move fast. She was about to smash up the last doll- Elizabeth, when Hinako ran into the room, her eyes huge. Natalia was behind her, gasping once she noticed what was going on.

“Oh my God! Hajime… did you…?” Hinako had grabbed Hajime's hand with the hammer in it. She was physically weak, but it was hard to tell. Her dolls… her precious dolls were…

“Did I what? Smash up your creepy dolls? Yes. And what about it?” Hajime asked. “Let go of me before I smash up your face. Let go of me!”

“Hajime, I don't know what's going on, but I'm sure there's a better way of handling -” Natalia began.

“Shut up, Natalia. This is between me and her.” Hajime turned her attention back to Hinako. “I think they look pretty, smashed up like that. What do you think?”

“I think… I think you're insane!” Hinako shouted. Tears began to fall from her eyes. “My dolls… my dolls… how could you do such a thing? Why? Why would you do that?”

“Just because.” Hajime swung her hammer into Elizabeth's face, feeling very proud of herself as Hinako let out an anguished scream.

“How could you destroy something so important to me? Do you know how hard I had to work to save for those dolls?”

“It's not my concern. I'd say buy them again… but…”

“They have sentimental value!” Hinako shouted. “How dare you! I'm going to…”

“What?” Hajime spoke first. “You're going to what? Here.”

Much to Hinako and Natalia's confusion, Hajime handed Hinako the hammer, smiling at her.

“Don't you want to smash my face up like I did to your dolls?” Hajime asked. “It's tempting, isn't it…”

“No… no…” Hinako was too in shock to say anything. Natalia took advantage of this by snatching the hammer away.

“Have you lost your mind? Why don't you explain why you're…”

“I thought I asked you to be quiet? I'm tired of the constant disrespect I get from you both.” Hajime turned back to Hinako, who was staring at the floor. “You can't stand me right?”

Hinako was crying so hard she could barely speak. Hajime continued, “How does it feel, knowing that the girl you hate oh so much, is living the life you dreamed about? How does it feel, seeing that the girl with the 'dirty blood’ is living like a princess? It's tearing you up inside, isn't it? That's why you can't look at me. Don't you wish your parents would come and save you like mine did?” Hajime started giggling. “Oh wait, they're dead! And all thanks to you!”

“Whoa! Hajime, I don't think you should…” Natalia began. She had no idea what to say. Was Hajime possessed by the devil or something? What had gotten into her? Whatever it was, Natalia didn't like it.

“You know nothing.” Hinako cut Natalia off. “You…”

“I know enough. You were never a princess… you're too selfish. That's why you left the house and left everyone inside to burn.” Hajime said cooly. “Is that why you pray all the time? Because you know what you did? And you want forgiveness?”

“Hajime!” Natalia shouted. “I don't know what's gotten into you, but you need to leave. You're being super inappropriate, and…”

“Get out! Get out of my house!!” Hinako grabbed Hajime and forced her out of the apartment, throwing her into the hallway. Hajime was too shocked to fight back, Hinako wasn't exactly known for her physical strength.

Natalia appeared a few minutes later with Hajime's shoes. She did not look very friendly.

“You aren't getting that hammer back.” Natalia told her.

“I don't care. I only bought it just to destroy her stupid toys.”

“Stupid toys? You know Hinako uses her doll collecting as a coping mechanism. Those dolls helped her get through her trauma and you destroyed them? How could you do such a thing? And the comments about her parents? How dare you! Hinako apologized to you, yet…”

Hajime shook her head. “Are you serious? Are you aware of how Hinako felt about me? Like how she truly felt about me?”

“She did nothing to deserve what you just did. There's nothing you can do to justify that.”

“Don't talk about things you don't know. Why don't you ask Hinako about all the things she's done to me since her birthday? Maybe she'll be emotional enough to tell the truth. Maybe then… you'll see.”

“Get out of here.”

Hajime left without any opposition, leaving Natalia to go back into the apartment. Hinako was staring sadly at her dolls.

“Why… why would she do something like that?” Hinako asked. “I did nothing…”

“I know you're not as innocent as you're claiming to be.” Natalia said. “So tell me. Tell me the entire truth. I know Hajime wouldn't do something like that without a damn good reason. What happened?”

Hinako shook her head. “I rejected her.”

“Huh?”

“She tried to kiss me at the hotel. That's why she wanted me there. Because she has a crush on me. I told her I don't look at her like that, and I don't know…”

Natalia just shook her head. “I asked you to tell me the truth. Who are you kidding? Hajime would never do something like that. She isn't that forward with her feelings. She never has been. I really hope you don't tell anyone else the lie you just told me.”

xxxxx

The next day, Hajime woke up to the sound of rain falling. It came down hard, angrily pelting the windows in her room. Was it a sign of things to come? Hajime thought so. Her behavior yesterday was shocking. She would've never thought she had it in her to start smashing up Hinako's dolls, but Hajime was hurt. Could you blame her?

As Sumi was still on her business trip, Hajime had the house to herself. She decided to spend her morning reading the newest issue of Ceramics Monthly, but Hajime didn't get that far. Saya (who Hajime had saved in her phone as Sayaya because she made a typo) had called her.

“Good morning Saya.” Hajime greeted.

“How are you doing? Are you okay?” Saya's voice was urgent.

“Why wouldn't I be?” Hajime asked. “Did something happen?”

“I wish I would've saw this last night when she first posted it so I could've called you then. Check Tamami's Facebook. It's important.”

“Okay… hold on.” Hajime opened the Facebook app. The good news was, Tamami's post was at the top of Hajime's feed, thanks to the amount of engagement it got. The bad news was… the actual content of the post.

“Some people are ridiculous. Imagine inviting a friend to a hotel for a good time and she tries coming onto you. Poor Hinako… rejected Fujiwara's advances and now she's messing with her. DM me for details. As for Fujiwara, what a crazy bitch! A certain blogger better be careful, because you're next. She puts the 'crazy’ in ‘crazy in love’.”

From what Hajime could see, the comment section was a warzone. Ayame announcing that she was blocking Tamami, Tamami trying and failing to get Ayame to change her mind, Natalia scolding Tamami, Saya's recent comment telling Tamami to ‘shut the hell up and mind your business’, and of course, a bunch of people commenting “Hajime?!” and even more people expressing disbelief or lack thereof that she liked Hinako. The final straw was Tamami tagging Hajime in a comment and asking for her 'hot take’.

“I'm deactivating my account.” Hajime announced. She felt like Tamami had punched her in the throat. “And no, I'm not okay. I'm not sure if I'll ever be okay.”

“Is it true?” Saya asked. “Do you really… like Hinako?”

“Not anymore. I can trust you, so I can tell you this. The truth is… I don't know how it started, but… I started feeling that way when I was in my second year of high school.”

“I see…”

“But I couldn't act on it. No way. Not only because we were being raised by nuns, but because it would be awkward if things didn't work out. Super awkward, since we shared a room with each other. I had to hide it, so I'd get a little rude towards her at times. I'd insult her designs and her sewing. I'd stop keeping my feelings on her dolls to myself. Anything to try to force myself to stop liking Hinako. It didn't work.”

“Of course it didn't. So… is that why you stole the acceptance letter?”

“Yes… I felt like Hinako liked the girls in the fashion club better than she liked me. She started spending so much time with them… so when Hinako told me she got into design school, I started panicking. I felt like if she went there, she'd definitely forget about me for good. She was already so much more popular than me in school… I felt like her shadow and not her friend. Hinako said otherwise, but I couldn't believe her. I couldn't understand why someone would like me. That's why I did what I did. Because I felt like our friendship wasn't supposed to happen... Think about it… Princess Hinako, and me…”

Saya didn't say anything. She wasn't sure of what to say, but she didn't have to to say anything. Hajime kept going.

“There was something I couldn't stand… how she can just accept good things happening to her. I'm the type of person where… if something good happens, I question it because it doesn't feel real. I don't think I deserve it, or anything. That's why I never applied to college, even though I ranked second in my year. That's why it's hard for me to smile and enjoy things. Hinako is the exact opposite… is it possible to be jealous of someone you're in love with?”

“Hajime…”

“I wasn't thinking when I stole her letter. I acted impulsively… I was being selfish and immature and that caused a huge rift in our relationship. It wasn't the same after that. She's rightfully very bitter about it, since she worked so hard. It's all my fault, I would call her spoiled and say rude things like she was coddled and had no pride… Hinako proved me wrong. She did that because she wanted _my_ approval. But instead of congratulating and supporting her like a normal person, I freaked out like a stupid bitch and…”

“Don't be so hard on yourself. Please don't talk about yourself like that. You aren't a stupid bitch. The important thing is that you feel some remorse. You didn't tell her this, did you? I think you should.”

“No… I can't. I couldn't tell Hinako that I liked her. She asked me why I stole her letter and I really couldn't tell her… I felt like I was going to die.” Hajime admitted. “That's the truth. Please don't put it on your blog…”

“I would never do such a thing… I could care less about who or what you like. You're still my friend.” Saya said. “The only weird person here is Tamami… and Hinako. Tamami had to find out some way… Hinako has the right to be mad, but the way she's going about it is super inappropriate.”

Hajime didn't know what to say, she was really touched by Saya's reaction. “Thank you…” Hajime said finally. “Thank you Saya.”

“But did what happen… really happen?”

Hajime told Saya the events from her birthday, starting with Hinako lying about covering Nanami's shift, and ending with Hinako trying to bait her. Hajime finished her story with, “Go ahead, say it. I told you so.”

“I'm not going to say it. I'm just… wow. Hinako is… maybe you should leave her alone. Live your best life without her.”

“I can't.” Hajime admitted. “I can't… that's easier said than done and you know it.”

“You're right… I'm sorry. We should do something to take your mind off of things… it's going to rain all day but tonight… we should go to the art museum and then go to the Rose Cafe afterwards. To make up for your birthday. What do you say?”

“Okay. I'll look forward to it.”

“I'll come over at 5. Don't worry. I'll be there!”

After that, the two hung up… and Hajime went back to her Facebook app. She was going to deactivate her account, but she got an idea.

She dialed a number from memory and then waited as it rang.

“Whoever you are, you just interrupted my Instagram Live, so please… call me back later. God.”

“Akira! Wait a second!”

“Hajime? Is that really you? Wow. I thought I'd never hear from you again. How have you been lately? I heard Aki made a huge mistake and she was pretty mortified by it…”

“I'm fine. Um… I'll make this quick because I don't want to interrupt your Instagram Live. Have you spoken to Aki recently?”

“Not in person… she gave me half the money you gave her as severance pay and then told me to have a nice life.”

“When was that?”

“Back in May. I was happy over the money, but about two weeks later I realized I missed her. So I tried finding her… she doesn't live in Japan anymore… so I had to take my search online.”

“Did you find her? I need to ask her something very important.”

“Well… I found her on Facebook. I requested her and she sent me a message with 'why’? Aki has no social skills, I tell you. Anyway I told her I missed her and she accepted the request. We talk a bit… she lives in Hawaii now.”

“Hawaii… um… can you send me her Facebook page? You can text it to me. This is my number.”

“Sure. I'll see what you can do… it might take a while though. I mentioned you once and she got really… bitter. She took it personally you gave her a 'frosty goodbye’. Whatever.”

“Oh…”

“Well don't pay her no mind. Aki is sensitive, given all that happened to her! I'll try to talk her into it. Just be patient, okay? Now I have to go. See ya!”

Akira hung up the phone, and Hajime went back to reading Ceramics Monthly. However, about twenty minutes later, she got another interruption, this time in the form of someone excessively ringing the doorbell.

Hajime went downstairs and stopped in front of the camera… only to see that Hinako was standing there, underneath an umbrella. Hajime slowly pressed the button to turn the intercom on.

“What are you doing here?”

“You have my picture. Give me back my picture!” Hinako shouted. “I know you took it, you thief! As expected from the daughter of…”

Hajime turned off the voice box and went back upstairs. After 30 minutes, the doorbell ringing ceased - as Hinako was gone. Hajime went back to reading her magazine. She was going to enjoy her quiet time before going to go hang out with Saya.

xxxxx

“How did you like the exhibit?”

Saya and Hajime were sitting in the Rose Cafe, after finishing their trip at the museum. The Rose Cafe was famous for two things - the wall of roses on the back wall, and their rose flavored macarons. Saya and Hajime were sharing six.

“I enjoyed it a lot. I'm glad we went... Pottery is so interesting to me.”

“You're so talented with it too. I always get compliments on my bowl.” Saya smiled. “You should try teaching me sometime.”

“Maybe…” Hajime said, then she started laughing.

“What's so funny?”

“I was just thinking… I used to get in serious trouble for making bowls out of mud when I was a kid. I used to love it when it rained.”

Saya started laughing. “I'm sorry but that's so cute.”

“The nuns were so happy when I outgrew that habit… but rain always makes me nostalgic for that reason. It's my favorite kind of weather.”

“Personally, I like it when it's sunny and there's big fluffy white clouds in the sky. I used to make shapes out of the clouds. I still do.” Saya admitted.

“That sounds so fun. On a day like that, we should go to the park and…”

Hajime and Saya's conversation was interrupted by the sound of someone getting slapped. Naturally, they both looked over to see what was going on. Surprisingly, it was Tamami and… the famous young actress, Misa Wakita. Tamami was holding onto her face, her eyes looking sad. 

“You shut your mouth! How many times do I have to tell you…” Misa's voice was relatively sharp, so most people looked away. Tamami seemed to be shaking in fear.

“I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I won't say it again… just please don't hit me anymore!” Tamami's eyes were closed tightly.

“ _ Never _ call me mom. You lost that privilege when you were born.” Misa told her. “You have your last name for a reason… stop trying to be noisy and accept what I give you.”

“But I want to be on the family registry…” Tamami begged. “Please… I'll keep my last name. Just… Legally accept me as your daughter. I want to have a family… I want to feel love too!”

“I can't believe you called me here for this. I am disgusted. You're nothing to me, which is why I gave you a fake surname. I give you money every month so I don't have to see your ugly, pathetic face. Yet… you still find a way to pop up and inconvenience me… it wasn't enough that you cost me a role that could've gotten me an Oscar… I could be an international star if not for you.”

“Well then maybe you should've been responsible. Maybe you should've used protection! Or maybe… if you didn't want a child so much… you should've had an abortion, or given me up for adoption! Why keep me if you hate me so much?!” Tamami screeched, and Misa threw her ice water at her.

“You're foolish. I kept you because I thought you would grow up into something amazing, but instead… I got you. You're 19 and you  _ still _ look like a child. A very plain… dark child. Do you think I want to be photographed with such a person, when I am known for my beauty?”

“....no.” Tamami muttered.

“Maybe if you were smart I could overlook your physical shortcomings. But you aren't. I always told you to bring home scores of 95 or higher… but you  _ continued  _ to defy me and bring home 60s and 70s. I got you into college too, after all the schools you applied to rejected you. But what did you do? Freak out like the child you are and drop out, causing me more shame! Your entire existence is a waste.”

“I did the best that I could…”

“Your best isn't good enough and that's the problem. Don't bother me and go back to following that Hamaguchi girl around like you always do. That's all you're good at, mindlessly following other people. I wouldn't be surprised if she hates you… she's going places, and you're dragging her down.”

“That's not true. That's not true!”

Misa ignored Tamami's distress. “And as always… if I find out that you tell anyone about our relationship… I'll bury you alive.”

Misa left the cafe, and Tamami, clearly overwhelmed, put her head down onto the table and started sobbing. Because of Misa's dire threat, and the influence and power that she had, none of the other cafe goers dared to ask if Tamami was okay. 

Back at the table, Saya and Hajime were mystified.

“Tamami is… wow. I can't believe it.” Saya frowned. “I feel really bad for her… so much about her makes sense now.”

“You think so…” Hajime focused on her tea. She was still not over Tamami outing her over Facebook, so she didn't feel like showing sympathy towards the devil. 

“She behaves the way she does for attention.” Saya guessed. “She wants her mom to accept her, no, she wants her mom to love her. But…”

“The crazy part is the fact that her mom gave her a different last name just so people wouldn't be able to find her.” Hajime said. “Sheesh…”

“Well, it worked. If you search her on a portal site she comes up as having no kids.” Saya pointed out. “But… I can't believe it. I assumed Tamami is a college student.”

“She  _ was _ . I always found it weird, Tamami hated school so why would she go to college? Tamami isn't dumb, she can be insightful when she wants to be… she's just bad at studying.” 

“School isn't for her.”

“Yes… you're right. So it was no surprise when she dropped out during the middle of her second semester.”

“So what does Tamami actually do with her life? You know, besides make messes on Facebook. Does she really just follow Ayame around…? I thought everyone was joking about that…”

“No… it's not a joke. That's really all she does.”

Saya sighed deeply. “Tamami’s behavior pisses me off, but at least now… I can be a little more understanding.”

Hajime nodded weakly. While Hajime was understanding of Tamami, she wasn't _ too _ understanding. All she could think about was how Tamami would feel if her secret was leaked.

Hajime was sure she'd find out eventually. After all, an eye for an eye...

xxxxx

“You don't understand… I need that picture back.” 

“I understand enough. I thought I told you not to tell anyone that lie you told me. Yet… you went and told Tamami… who told everyone.”

It was once again a slow day at Mizuki Department Store, so Hinako had decided to pass the time by venting. From what Natalia could gather, Hinako really wanted her picture back. 

“She took the picture before all of that.” Hinako insisted. “I went to her house and she ignored me. I was out there for thirty minutes in the rain and I…” Hinako finished her sentence by sneezing.

“You caught a cold.” Natalia observed. “Maybe if you would've told me the truth, this wouldn't have happened.”

“I did tell you the truth.” Hinako insisted.

“No… you told a lie and started a witch hunt.”

“I didn't start a witch hunt. I didn't tell Tamami to post that online.”

“But you gave Tamami the information. She has gone missing as well. She's not online and her phone is off. Ayame has gone no contact with her too.”

“Hajime killed Tamami.”

“No. She's probably feeling very guilty about everything. You don't want to see what people are writing on Hajime's wall. I want to wash their mouths out with soap. She doesn't deserve this.”

“She shouldn't have broken my dolls.”

“Which she probably wouldn't have done if you didn't do whatever it is that you're hiding. The sooner you come clean… the better.”

“Why are you speaking as if Hajime is the victim? I'm the victim here, not her! She has the only picture of my mother left… I'm scared. If she destroys it like she destroyed my dolls…”

“Hajime wouldn’t sink that low.” Natalia sighed. “You can trust me on this.”

“If you say so…” Hinako smiled, “I can trust you, Natalia.” 

“Excuse me.” 

Hinako and Natalia's conversation was interrupted by Hajime, who had walked over. Natalia was not going to let Hinako handle her, so she spoke first.

“Good afternoon! How may I help you today?”

“I have a coupon I want to use.” Hajime said, moving her dark eyes over to Hinako.

“What are you looking at?” Hinako snapped.

“I think you should go somewhere…  have you gone on break yet?” Natalia asked.

“Oh no… it's fine. I'm not going to do anything to her. I only want to buy some perfume. As for my coupon… I need you to tell me how much I can get off.  It's a special coupon.” 

“Okay. Let me see…”

Hajime opened up her wallet and pulled out a folded piece of paper. She unfolded it, and then held it up. Both Natalia and Hinako gasped as they saw that Hajime's coupon wasn't actually a coupon, but Hinako's picture!

“So tell me… how much can I get for this?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just want to put it out there that in Chapter 1, Natalia noticed that Hajime keeps her nails short... 👀
> 
> (Also I'm not THAT into shipping but I low-key ship Saya and Hajime lol)


	11. XI

XI

“I said, how much can I get for this?”

Hajime stood before Hinako and Natalia, smirking and holding up Hinako's picture, as if it was an award she won. They were both in shock that Hajime was doing something as bold as this, Natalia especially.

“I think you should really give that back to Hinako.” she said. “Please don't drag Hinako's precious memories into this…”

“I'll do what I want, Natalia. Why is Hinako's family off limits when she always gets away with saying terrible things about mine?”

“Because… that's a good question. Hinako, you should apolo…”

“Give it back!” Hinako interrupted, charging over to Hajime. She had the intention to snatch her picture away, but Hajime was faster. Before Hinako could get close enough, Hajime tore the picture in half, and then into fourths. She kept going until the picture was practically confetti. Then she threw the pieces into Hinako's face.

“Oh no… my fingers slipped.” Hajime sighed deeply. “Well, I can't use an expired coupon, so… I'll be leaving. Bye Natalia.”

“You…” Natalia began. “How could you do that…”

Hinako couldn't bring herself to talk. Her precious picture… the last memory of her mother… she thought about how happy she was when she received that picture in the hospital. Hinako was elated. She had believed that everything was destroyed.

And now everything  _ was _ destroyed. 

“You have nothing to say?” Hajime asked Hinako. “I guess it is true. You really  _ are  _ selfish. As expected from the girl who let her family burn to ashe-”

Hinako cut her off by slapping Hajime in the face. Hajime looked up, staring at Hinako, who was biting her lip and trying not to cry. Hajime actually felt really guilty, but she wasn't going to show that.

“Guys…” Natalia started. “I  _ really _ don't know what's going on here, but…”

“There's nothing going on…” Hinako told her. “As for Hajime, get out of here before I call security on you.”

“You don't have to tell me twice. If you need me, I'll be home, in my castle.” 

“I hope it collapses!” Hinako yelled after her.

Hajime left the perfume department, leaving Hinako to drop to the ground and start picking up the pieces of her photo. Maybe she could put it back together, if she really tried. 

“So are you going to tell me the truth? Why is Hajime being like this?” Natalia asked. “How long are you going to drag this out for?”

“I told you the truth, but you claimed it was a lie.” Hinako said, not even looking up at her friend.

“Look at how things are turning out. First you lost your dolls. Now your picture is ruined.”

“Don’t say that! It's not ruined!” Hinako's voice was soaked with desperation. “I can fix it… if I work really hard, I can fix it! I will fix it!”

Natalia sighed deeply. “Hajime is on a warpath to destroy everything important to you… because you rejected her advance? Are you sure that's the truth?”

“I said that's the truth. Leave me alone, Natalia.”

“Fine. But if I were you, I'd really consider apologizing. You don't have to come clean to me, but you should come clean to her.”

“Apologize? To her? Get real.”

“No… you 'get real’. I recommend that you apologize before Hajime goes too far and does something even worse. Seriously… think about what I'm saying.”

“Okay… whatever. Leave me alone. Please...”

Natalia, noticing how upset Hinako was, decided that it was best to respect Hinako's wishes and walked away. However, she wasn't done. She had the intention to finish this conversation later.

As for Hinako, as she continued to gather the pieces of her photo, she remembered something from that night.

_ “Why is your hair wet?” _

_ “You smell like chlorine. It's almost like you went swimming.” _

“No way…” Hinako said to herself. Back then, Hinako didn't think much of Hajime's observations. They seemed innocent, but now? It was very likely that Hajime was being passive aggressive. Was it possible that Hajime saw Hinako at the pool? Or worse… was it possible that Hajime heard Hinako's conversation with Ayame, Seira and Tsukasa? If she did, that made a lot of sense. What also made a lot of sense was the fact that Hajime would definitely be hanging around a pool - she liked swimming. 

Upon coming to this realization, Hinako covered her mouth with a shaky hand. Hajime had definitely overheard Hinako that day. There was really no other explanation as to why she turned on her… at least, any other explanation that Hinako could come up with. 

Shit.

xxxxx

“Are you okay? You should really eat something… you look sick, Hajime.”

After leaving the department store, Hajime had went home. Truth to be told, she felt like the biggest piece of shit - first it was Hinako's dolls, now it was her picture. What was next? She had impulsively messaged Akira because she wanted to get even by learning Hinako's secret. She had also intended using Tamami's secret against her too, but seeing as though Tamami went missing after the cafe incident, was that a good idea?

Was any of this a good idea? The question tore Hajime's heart into pieces, so she spent the rest of the day laying in her bed, staring at the wall. The only time she got out of her bed was to use the bathroom. This whole thing was taking a toll on her, so Hajime didn't actually eat, either. 

A day had passed, and now, Saya was over. She had come over after Hajime had said she wasn't feeling well, which Hajime found a little annoying. She would think that Saya would stay away from her, but Saya was now in her bedroom, watching as Hajime struggled to keep her eyes open.

“I am sick.” Hajime said finally. “I'm sick and there's nothing you can do about it.”

“What's wrong?” Saya placed her hand onto Hajime's forehead. “You don't have a fever…”

“No… I'm not physically sick… I'm mentally sick. Something is seriously wrong with me…”

“Something must have happened. What's going on?”

“It's about Hinako.” Hajime started. She wasn't going to bring up Tamami because she hadn't acted on it yet. “You see, Hinako likes collecting dolls… she had five and really likes taking care of them. You know this, right?”

“Yes… I remember us getting her that one doll.”

“Yeah… Hinako really loves them. I told you she used to talk to them when she was younger… because of the traumatic incident she went through. So…” Hajime's voice trailed off.

“So…?” Saya repeated. She had no idea where Hajime was going with this.

“So… because of what happened on my birthday… I destroyed all of them. I went over her house and shattered them, because I knew how important they were to her. I knew that would hurt her like nothing else, and it did. I also said some really bad things too, like I was implying that Hinako's parents died because of her. Of course, Hinako did not take this well. She threw me out… Natalia was there too and I think she hates me now.”

“Hajime… holy shit.”

“That's not all I did. There's only one picture of Hinako's mother left. Well, there  _ was _ only one picture of Hinako's mother left. It was on her dresser. I stole it and…”

“Hajime.” Saya's tone was very disapproving. All Saya had said was her name, but that was enough to get Hajime to start bawling.

“I know, I know!! I'm a monster… what kind of person am I?” Hajime sobbed. “I never expected that I could do such things, but I just can't stop hearing the things that Hinako was saying. She hates me but no matter what I can't bring myself to hate her!”

“Here.” Saya reached into her purse and handed Hajime a handkerchief. “Wipe your face…”

Hajime patted her face dry, then she continued. “The things I did… they're tearing me up inside! I haven't been able to do anything since tearing up Hinako's picture. I can't even bring myself to drink water… I just think about Hinako crying and Natalia looking at me like I'm dirt and I just…”

“Okay, okay. I understand.” Saya said. “I do not approve of what you did at all, but the past is the past. We cannot change it, so we need to live in the present. Try to relax. Take deep breaths in through your nose and out through your mouth. I'll be back.”

Saya left the room, and Hajime slowly did what Saya told her to do. She did feel a little ridiculous doing the breathing exercises, but they did help as Hajime felt a little better. Saya had also returned, holding out a glass of water.

“Drink up.” she told her, which Hajime did. 

“Do you feel better?”

“A little bit… thank you, Saya. But I don't know what to do. I'm going to have to face Hinako some day…”

“I really think it's best for you to end things with her. Of course, you should definitely apologize… but after that, you should stop talking to her. I know it'll be hard, since you still have feelings for her, but it's for the best if you do.”

“But…”

“But nothing. If I were in your position, and I was the one who Hinako had hurt, would you be telling me to continue being friendly with her?”

“No…”

“Exactly. Life is too short to be trapped in a toxic relationship. Sincerely apologize for destroying her dolls and her family picture, but live your best life without her.”

“I guess I can see what you're saying.” Hajime nodded. “It'll be hard but…” she reached for her phone.

“One day at a time. Let's try living one day at a time.” Saya advised, taking Hajime's phone away from her. “Don't force yourself to apologize to Hinako if you're not mentally up for it, like right now.”

“Okay.” 

“Also there are more important matters at hand. What kind of food do you like? I'll make it for you.”

xxxxx

Even though Saya's unexpected visit had annoyed Hajime at first, she found herself feeling grateful for her friend. After the conversation with Saya, Hajime told her that her favorite food was miso cod. Just as Saya said, she was going to make it for Hajime. There was only one problem with that…

Saya couldn't cook for shit. She ended up burning the cod so it was inedible, so the two decided to order a pizza instead. The spent the rest of the afternoon marathoning what Saya considered “so bad they're hilarious” romantic comedies… which she was definitely right about! Hajime had never laughed so hard in her life - her stomach was hurting but she really needed the laughs. Especially in light of everything that was going on.

Unfortunately, all good things had to come to an end. When the fourth movie went off, Saya had to go. After seeing Saya off, Hajime went back into the living room. The TV was still on, and Hajime was intending to turn it off. However, due to her upbringing, and how she lived most of her adult life, Hajime wasn't very comfortable with technology. TVs, computers, cell phones… Hajime had a general idea of how to use those things, but she was still prone to making mistakes. For instance, she was very embarrassed when Hinako told her that you weren't supposed to type with just your index fingers.

That was exactly why Hajime was neither shocked or surprised when she pressed a button on the remote and the TV guide popped up. She tried to turn the TV down, but instead of pressing the volume down button, she pressed the page down button, showing the information for the movie that was airing on the next channel.

“Elevator Girl.” Hajime read out loud. She was about to turn the TV off, until she saw who the leading actress was - Misa Wakita, also known as Tamami's mother. 

It was right there that Hajime decided that she was going to visit Tamami tomorrow. She would have to dig a bit for Tamami's address, but it would be worth it, she figured.

xxxxx

Much to Hajime's surprise, Tamami lived in a middle class residential district. Her neighborhood was made up of low rise apartment buildings; Tamami's building was right across the street from an empty lot that spanned an entire block. From what Hajime could see, the lot had been turned into a huge flower garden. The garden was surrounded by a chain link fence, and people decorated it with what Hajime guessed were papercrafts. It stood out amongst all of the modern low rises.

But that wasn't important right now. Hajime left the flower field alone and headed into what she hoped was the right building.

“Come on, Tamami. Pull it together!”

Inside of the apartment, Tamami had been brushing her hair, trying to talk herself into going back to “normal”. But what was normal for Tamami? Tamami herself wasn't sure. Tamami usually saw her mother three or four times a year, and it'd always turn out the same way. Usually Tamami would feel bad for about a day or two but this time was different. Why? Was it what Misa had said? “All you're good for is mindlessly following people around.”  There was some truth in that statement - first Tamami would try to follow her mother, because she desperately wanted her approval. Then came Ayame, although Ayame seemed to be distancing herself. Now it was Hinako… who only seemed to acknowledge Tamami whenever she wanted to complain about Hajime.

Tamami had spent the last week hiding out, acting as a shut in. She had turned her phone off and turned off the Wi-Fi router. What was the point of going out? What was the point being present? Instead, Tamami spent her time reading historical novels - escapism helped her when she was a little girl, and it still helped now. 

There was a knock at the door, so Tamami set her brush down. She honestly didn't know who to expect - she  _ wanted  _ it to be Ayame, but Ayame seemed to be done with her. So was everyone else… except for Hinako. 

Tamami opened the door, expecting Hinako, but instead… Hajime was standing there, her expression stone cold.

Of course it was Hajime! Tamami's emotions overwhelmed her and she began to cry.

“I'm so sorry!” she wailed. “I didn't mean to post that! I didn't mean to expose you to everyone…”

Hajime was not moved. “But you did post it. Not only that, the post is still up. Do you really mean what you say?”

“Of course!” 

“Then why didn't you delete the post?” Hajime wedged her way past Tamami and walked into her apartment. Tamami followed, her heart in her throat as Hajime sat on the couch.

“I… I don't know… I guess because Hinako…” Tamami's voice trailed off. Hinako didn't really have a presence on Facebook, as she forgot her password years ago. Hinako didn't care enough to reset it. Using her as an excuse was a bad idea. Maybe Tamami should've deleted the post before going into isolation. But it was far too late for that.

“I didn't come here to talk to you about what you did.” Hajime told her. “Whether you deleted it or not doesn't mean anything - you still posted it…”

“So why did you come here…?” Tamami asked. “Do you want me to do something to Hinako? We can get revenge.”

“No… I'm better than that. I've reflected and realized that I've been acting inappropriate this entire time… I'm not going to stoop to her level… or yours either!”

Tamami flinched. “I see…”

“The truth is… Saya and I went to the Rose Cafe… and we saw you and your mother.”

“That's not my mother. I don't know what you're talking about, but…”

“We heard everything.” Hajime told her. “We saw you get slapped and her throw her drink on you. You seemed to just take it.”

“That's all I can do…” Tamami sighed miserably. “Don't worry about it. I'm used to how she is. My skin may bruise, but it no longer hurts when she hits me.”

Hajime paused. Believe it or not, it really hurt to see Tamami like this. “I'd always wonder why your mom never came to school on parents day - I used to think you were an orphan, like me, which is why I started talking to you in the first place…”

“Maybe I'd be happier if I was an orphan.” Tamami mumbled. “She hates me. I do my best to be a good daughter but… it's not even worth repeating.”

“I can't help but to pity you… I want to kick your ass for outing me. That's what you deserve. However… I feel really bad for you. Your mom made you like this… but you choose to behave in that way.”

“I know you're mad… I'm sorry for everything… just please… don't tell anyone. If it gets out I'm going to fear for my life.. Please…” Tamami begged.

“I'm not going to be like you. I'm going to respect your secret, even though you couldn't respect mine… I just want this all to end… it'll take a while for me to warm up to you again, but I forgive you.”

“Hajime…”

Hajime stood up from the couch. “I don't know how often you see your mom, but if she ever hits you and you feel like you need somewhere to go… you can come to my house.”

Tamami just nodded silently. She couldn't believe this. Was Hajime  real or was she an angel? Hajime was willing to do that for her, even though Tamami had been horrible to her. Would Hinako, who Tamami was currently following, do the same?

Whatever the answer was, Tamami was very grateful for Hajime right now.

xxxxx

“Hinako, get your face off the glass. You don't know how long it's been since that was cleaned.”

The next day, Natalia was watching as Hinako pressed her face up against storefront window. As the two had off today, they were window shopping. Hinako's goal was to start replacing her doll collection, while Natalia's was a bit different…

“None of the dolls I see are speaking to me…” Hinako complained, turning to face Natalia. “Next shop we go.”

“How many shops have we been to?”

“Five. Just think… if it weren't for Hajime… this is all her fault.” Hinako stomped her foot into the ground and started pouting.

“No... this isn't her fault. Why won't you accept responsibility?”

“Accept responsibility for what? That she went psycho after I rejected her?”

“Can you please stop?” Natalia sucked her teeth. “How long are you going to pretend that's the truth?”

“Not this again. How many times do I have to tell you…”

“Do you think I'm a fool? Hajime isn't a stranger to me. I know her and I know that even if she did like you, she wouldn't just come on to you like that. That's not how Hajime is. I also know that she wouldn't lose her mind just because she didn't get her way. That's something you would do.”

“Okay, so…”

“So…” Natalia sighed. “I don't know if you realized this or not, but my birthday is coming up in a few days, and…”

“Are we doing what we usually do?”

“Yes… pool party at Ayame's house.”

“Will there be cheesecake?” Hinako asked, her face lighting up.

“Um… I'll get one for you.” Natalia told her, and Hinako showed her appreciation by hugging her.

“Yay! I'm excited. So who's going to be there?’

“Everyone is going to be there. I asked Tamami last night and she surprisingly answered.”

“Everyone?” Hinako repeated, letting go of Natalia. “Does that include Hajime?”

“Of course it does… I always invite Hajime. I mean… I haven't asked her yet, but when I do…”

“You can't! You can't invite Hajime! Have you lost it? If Hajime comes, then I won't go!” Hinako smiled, as if she were proud of herself. “What do you have to say about that?”

Natalia shrugged. “I hope you have fun doing whatever it is you'll be doing instead.”

“Don't be like that! Are you really choosing her over me…?” Hinako looked very worried over this. 

“It looks like it.” Natalia answered. “I just want to have a good time. I feel like if you're there, you'll cause problems… so it'll be for the better if you sit this one out. I don't feel that way about Hajime.”

“Wait! I take that back… um…”

“So are you going to come?” 

“Of course…” 

“Will you do your best to get along with Hajime?” Natalia pressed on. “I already talked this over with Ayame. She and I agreed to kick you out if you start something. You aren't going to start something, are you?”

“Of course not!” Hinako told her. “Are you going to interrogate Hajime like this too?

“Why does that concern you? Mind your business.”

“She has the blood of a criminal.” Hinako quipped. “So if anyone deserves to be talked to like that…”

“I'm starting to think that you're jealous of Hajime. I remember what she was saying when she gave you the hammer, and…”

“Why would I be jealous of Hajime? She has dirty blood and a filthy character. I may not have money, but at least my family was made up of good people.”

“Even though you think that, she is right - she's now living the kind of life you have been dreaming about… all thanks to a mix up on the hospital's part.”

Hinako laughed derisively. “Do you seriously think that the hospital mixed her up with someone else? Do you believe that?”

“Yes… you know the saying. Truth is stranger than fiction… and Fujiwara _ is  _ a common last name.”

“Whatever. I still think her parents are scammers, and…”

“If you keep going I'm going to revoke your invitation. Stop.”

“Fine.” Hinako grumbled. The idea of Hinako getting kicked out over Hajime was a bit embarrassing, so she decided not to say anything else. However, there was something else that bothered her.

“Is Ayame okay with me coming over her house?”

Natalia shrugged and began to walk away. “Why wouldn't she be?” she yelled out, not even bothering to turn around.

Hinako followed Natalia, feeling relieved. Ever since the incident at the hotel, Ayame had been avoiding her. Maybe Ayame had gotten over that. Hinako hoped that she did

... since when was Ayame on good terms with Hajime?

xxxxx

Later that evening, Hajime was using her laptop to lurk Facebook. Despite everything that she said to Tamami the day before, she  _ still  _ didn't delete the post. On the other hand, the volume of hate comments that Hajime had gotten had gone down drastically. While deleting the post would've been a nice gesture, Hajime wasn't sure if it would've really done anything… 

However, Tamami wasn't the reason why Hajime had gotten on Facebook, she had been checking to see if Akira had messaged her - Akira had found Hajime and sent her a friend request the day after Hajime had called her. There was nothing new, so Hajime decided to start typing up a message to her. 

“I don't think I want to speak to Aki anymore…” Hajime started. She didn't know what to say after that, and just found herself staring at the blinking cursor. But not for long - after a minute of staring, the doorbell rang.

Hajime left her laptop and checked the camera to see who it was - she was expecting Saya, but it was Natalia. Hajime reluctantly let her in and met her at the front door.

“I feel like I haven't seen you in forever.” Natalia started. “Like the last time I saw you, you were…” 

“...tearing up Hinako's photograph.” Hajime finished. “I know how bad it is that I did something like that, so please don't lecture me. The past few days have been hard enough.”

“Oh no… I wasn't going to come here to make things worse for you. I wanted to remind you that my birthday is coming up in three days and as always… we're going to be at Ayame's house.”

“Wait… you want me to come to your party?” Hajime asked in disbelief. 

“Um… yeah. Why wouldn't I?”

“I thought that you hated me.”

“What the hell? Why would I hate you?”

“Because the last time we really talked was right after I got thrown out of Hinako's apartment. Your tone and the things you were saying lead me to believe that you hated me.”

“Well I don't hate you.” Natalia clarified. “I can't hate you… or Hinako, for that matter. How can I hate you when the both of you helped me adjust to a foreign country? I'm still very grateful for that… even though that was five years ago.”

“I didn't realize that I was so important to you.”

“Of course you are! My Japanese would not be as good as it is if not for you.” Natalia smiled. “And I'm glad, because I would probably be illiterate if I had to rely on Hinako.”

“Yeah she doesn't like writing kanji if she doesn't have to…” Hajime recalled. “She never writes my name like it's meant to be written… she has it saved in her phone in hiragana, and if she had to write it out she'd write it like that too. Speaking of which…  she's going to be at your party, right?”

“Of course.” Natalia answered. “Is that a problem? I already talked to Hinako… she said that she wouldn't come if you came, but I shut that down immediately. She should be there. But don't worry, I invited Saya too.”

“It’s fine.” Hajime smiled. “I don't care about Hinako… I'll be there for you.”

“That's great… but um… can I ask you something?”

“What is it?”

“Do you really like Hinako? Or should I say… did you like her?”

Hajime laughed in an attempt to make her answer believable. “Of course not! You know Hinako is a little delusional… that's probably a fantasy she has… that everyone is in love with the princess.”

“Ah… I see. I knew she was lying. However… I didn't want to be like Tamami and just believe it without asking you.”

“I appreciate it. I'll see you at the party, okay?”

“Okay! Bye Hajime!”

“Bye Natalia.”

Hajime let Natalia out, then she sighed deeply. Did Hajime want to face Hinako? Hell no! However, she intended to apologize Hinako there - Hajime was going to take Saya's advice. She was going to apologize to Hinako and then move on for good. There was no point in doing it privately - Hajime figured witnesses were a good thing, in case Hinako decided to do something funny.

Now to think about what she had to say. Hajime was going to go back to her bedroom and think about this, however she didn't get very far.

“What do you think you're doing?”

Standing on the stairwell, blocking Hajime's path, was none other than Kyoko. She was still wearing Hinako's pendant, Hajime noticed.

“What are you doing here?” Hajime demanded. “I thought I was done with you. Also… are you here because I'm going to die soon?”

“No… you aren't going to die. I just wanted to say hi, because I can't forget about anyone who reminds me of myself.” Kyoko said. 

“Well… I don't know about that…”

“You lack my beauty and charm but our circumstances are similar…” Kyoko descended the steps and stood in front of Hajime. “It must be nice, finding out that your cursed background isn't actually cursed. I wish I could relate…”

“I want to know why you're here. If you came here to insult me you can leave. Why are you bothering me?”

“Because I want to stop you from doing something you regret… I don't understand you. You have the opportunity to put Tamami and Hinako in their places and you want to take the high road?”

“Yes. You're absolutely right.” Hajime nodded. “I think Tamami could end up being my friend again if she cleans up her act. As for Hinako… I think it's best for me to move on.”

“I think it's best for me to move on.” Kyoko said mockingly. “God… do you hear yourself? Humans are all the same… thinking they know the answers. You don't know shit.”

“Excuse me?”

“You heard what I said. Remember… I know your future… I know how everything will turn out. Don't you want to know?”

“You might as well tell me. Is it the nature of demons to be like this?”

“Despite everything, I am an angel and you will respect me as such.” Kyoko reminded Hajime, her voice steely. “But since you want to know… you will end up being friends with Tamami again.”

“That's good.”

“Not exactly. She will only befriend you because she wants to please Hinako. Since Ayame wants nothing to do with Tamami anymore, Tamami will start to follow Hinako around. Hinako will only speak to her unless Tamami wants to feed her delusions. Tamami can't do that, so she uses Hinako's hatred towards you to stay in her favor. All they do is gossip about you…”

“That's a lie. I'd believe that, but I talked to Tamami, and she seemed to be apologetic… I feel like she's going to change eventually.”

“She was lying… she's not going to change. That Facebook post is still up, isn't it? Goes to show just how apologetic she is…”

Hajime didn't answer; Kyoko was right. Kyoko kept going. “As for Hinako… you apologize and try to go no contact with her. You last for a week because you're like most humans, weak and pathetic. Hinako starts talking to you again, because she wants certain things… pretty dresses and fancy dolls. You buy them for her because you're so desperate for Hinako's affection…”

“Stop it…” 

“I'm not done. You buy them for Hinako. She's empowered by this and with Tamami's help, pretends to be in love with you. She confesses and you two start dating without a second thought… except she doesn't love you. Why would she love you? She loves what you have, and you spoil her rotten because you're stupid.”

“Shut up! I'm not stupid! You're telling lies!” 

“You think I'm telling lies? The truth hurts. But I'm not done. Eventually, Hinako gets tired of faking it. She breaks up with you, hurting you again. You go off the deep end and drown her in the pool at Kiryu Palace. Then you drown yourself. Roppongi Murder-suicide.” Kyoko laughed, even though nothing she said was funny. “It's actually pitiful.”

“You're lying. Hinako isn't allowed into Tsukasa's hotel.” Hajime pointed out. “She's banned from there. Moreover, Hinako cannot swim. Why would she go there?”

“Do you think that will stop her?” Kyoko asked, trying to hide her nervousness. “Her not being able to swim didn't stop her from bailing on you. Wasn't her hair wet? Didn't she smell like chlorine?”

Bringing up Hajime's birthday was enough to get Hajime to calm down. “You're right…” She said finally. “I don't want to have a future as dark as my past… I don't want to end up like that. What should I do, Kyoko?”

“Set boundaries by making it so those two will never want to talk to you again.” Kyoko smiled as she handed Hajime an envelope.

“What's that?” 

“The contact information for FRIDAY. You know… the tabloid magazine? Expose Tamami like she exposed you.” Kyoko instructed.

“That's a little…” Hajime's voice trailed off as she thought about what Tamami said about fearing for her life. 

“A little what? Extreme? Sometimes we have to be extreme to get our points across. I had to be extreme to get my point across… it's worth it in the end.” Kyoko said. “And think of it this way. If the roles were reversed… do you think Tamami wouldn't expose you?”

“You're right…”

“I always am.” Kyoko smiled. “As for Hinako… don't be stupid. Don't go easy on her. Do not apologize… don't give her that window. Don't listen to Saya on this matter either. She means well, but she's setting you up… you did the right thing by ruining Hinako's photograph and her dollies. Anyone who says otherwise wants to see you fail. Don't let your guilt control you.”

“Okay. Thank you Kyoko.” Hajime smiled a bit, even though she was shaking on the inside. “You're going to help me live my best life.”

“Of course.” Kyoko smiled. “And while you're at it… straighten up your desk. It's embarrassing that you can't take care of your own space.”

xxxxx

One email to FRIDAY later, Hajime had busied herself by cleaning up her desk, which really wasn't that bad. Kyoko was just anal, she figured. But either way, Hajime decided to take her advice… if it wasn't for Kyoko, Hajime would have a horrible future - straightening up her desk was the least she could do.

As Hajime was stacking her magazines, she got a notification on her phone. She left the magazines alone and saw that it was a Facebook notification.

“I heard that you wanted to talk to me?”

The message was from Aki. If Hajime had received this message before that conversation with Kyoko, she would've told Aki that there was no need. However, things were a bit different now.

“I’ll be direct and spare the details. Please tell me Hinako's secret.” Hajime sent. 

“Okay.” 

As Hajime waited for Aki to respond, she stared at Aki's page - she was definitely living in Hawaii now - the profile picture was a dead giveaway. She also appeared to adopt a dog - a black lab which she named Bullet. Hajime was scrolling through a conversation between her and Akira - they were talking about Call of Duty (Hajime had no idea what that was) - when Aki finally responded with a link to an article.

“I don't want to hear anything from you after this,” Aki had said.

Hajime ignored her, and clicked on the link to the article, which was written by a girl named Kaori Sakuramori. As she read it, Hajime's hands grew clammy. She gripped her phone so hard, the device seemed to cut into her hands. The content of the article was so shocking that when Hajime finished it, she dropped her phone and immediately fell to her knees, as she was shaking so much!

Princess Hinako was about to get exiled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Never thought I'd be able to reference 六本木心中(Roppongi Murder-Suicide, it's a song by Ann Lewis and one of my fucking faves) in an imas fic but here we are lol... 
> 
> Next week is the moment we've all been waiting for hahaha


	12. XII

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> cw abuse
> 
> things are getting quite dark in atg land

XII

_ No way… no way… I can't believe this… This can't be real. There's no way… no way… _

Hajime's disbelief was interrupted by the sound of her phone vibrating. She quickly picked it up and stared at the message she received from Aki. “Shocking, isn't it? She had added a smiling face at the end of her message, like the news she just shared with Hajime was trivial. Of course, it wasn't. Hajime could barely fathom the details.

_ 607 people dead. 535 people injured. 364 people missing. Building collapse. Fire. Castle Department Store. Sky Apartments. Conspiracy. Murder. Corruption. Obstruction of justice. Bribery. “Yusuke Kita shattered the illusion of justice for many… but he was unable to avoid divine retribution.” _

“I can't believe it. Did this really happen?”

“Of course it did. I remember when it happened, it was big news. Big news. The department store was famous. Going there for the first time as a little girl was super exciting! It didn't feel like a store to me, it was so fun. But anyway, I was 11 when the connection between the fire and the collapse was revealed. I remember it very clearly because my mom was crying over how evil the world was, and my dad started lecturing me.”

“About what?”

“About how you shouldn't let your greed for money consume you and do questionable things… things to hurt others, like that man had done.”

Hajime was so glad that Aki could not see her face because if she could, she probably would've brought out Charlene. Even then, despite the Pacific ocean between them, Hajime was still not going to call her out for being a hypocrite. Some things, such as fear, did not go away so quickly.

“What? Is there something you'd like to say…” Aki sent an eye emoji which Hajime found super unsettling.

“I need proof. I just can't believe this…” Hajime wrote. “How do you know that this is Hinako's family?”

“The last paragraph gives it away. Kita isn't a common last name, especially with the way Hinako's is written… on top of that… I remember seeing her father do a press conference on television. Hinako has the same personality - she draws you in and you think she's so sweet and nice. But she's rotten to the core.”

“You aren't lying about that but… you mixed me up with the other Hajime. Can I trust what you're saying?”

“You're the same as always. Why don't you ask the journalist yourself instead of whining about it to me? Kaori is well respected… she wouldn't just put out a bullshit article for clicks.”

“Okay. Good idea. Thank you Aki.” Hajime quickly responded to that, then opened up the article again, scrolling towards the top. There was a mail icon next to Kaori's name. Hajime clicked that and began to type up an email…

_ Good evening,  _

_ My name is Hajime Fujiwara and I … _

Hajime stopped herself. What was she going to say? Judging by the quality of Kaori's writing and investigative skills, she seemed to be very busy. The last thing she wanted was for Kaori to turn her down because she didn't want to be involved with Hajime and Hinako's drama. So, she was going to have to lie. She was going to need a fake name - Hajime didn't have to think long for one - the name Yoshino Yorita stood out to her for some reason.

_ My name is Hajime Fujiwara and I recently came across your article - the one about the Kita family. I believe that one of my cousins perished in the collapse of the department store. She went missing that day and I have yet to receive closure. If it's okay with you… may we please meet to discuss this?  _

Hajime then added her contact information and then sent the email. Aki had gone offline, leaving Hajime to once again read the article.

_ “Yusuke Kita shattered the illusion of justice for many… but he was unable to avoid divine retribution. Six months after the trial was thrown out, his house burned down. It is said that a victim's husband burned it down to avenge his deceased wife, but the case went cold very quickly. He perished in the fire, as well as his wife, Arisa, and their 8 year old daughter, Hinako.” _

“That's weird.” Hajime said as she reread the last sentence. Wasn't Hinako an older sister? She could've sworn Hinako wasn't an only child - she definitely had siblings, right? Hajime thought this through, but she couldn't remember anything - after all, Hinako didn't talk about her family like that. Either way, everyone believed that Hinako was dead. Of course, Hinako wasn't dead, but she'd wish she was after this got out. 

And Hajime couldn't wait.

xxxxx

Unfortunately, Hajime had to wait - Kaori really was a busy girl, and she didn't respond to Hajime until the day before Natalia's party. She had agreed to meet her on July 1st though, which was two days after Natalia's party. As for Natalia's party, Hajime focused all of her energy on making Natalia a present. When she finally finished it the night of the 28th, Hajime felt super accomplished - she could only hope that Natalia loved the gift as much as Hajime loved making it!

As for the party, it was at Ayame's house. Ayame lived in an older mansion, as it was passed down from her family members. Not only was it spacious, but it had a historical charm to it. On top of that, Ayame had a pool. It went without saying that whenever the group wanted to get together at someone's house, it was always at Ayame's. Everyone liked Ayame's house the best.

Not that Ayame minded.

But what Ayame did notice was that since Hinako hadn't arrived yet, there was an odd number of people at the party. Saya and Hajime were sitting on the chairs and laughing about some bad romantic comedy they saw, while Natalia and Ayame were in the water. Ayame watched as Natalia tried to get onto a neon green inflatable raft. As soon as Natalia managed to jump on it, Ayame swam over to her, placing her hand on the raft.

Natalia saw the hand and freaked out, flipping the raft over with her. When she resurfaced, she was pissed.

“Oh my God! What did I tell you about sneaking up on people like that?”

“I was only trying to jump on.” Ayame pouted. “And it's not my fault I'm naturally quiet. Maybe you should get on my level.”

“In an alternate universe, you'd probably be a spy. Or a ninja. Your talent is being wasted as a TV host.” Natalia complained. “God! I was so close…”

“Well, wait a second, birthday girl… something is missing. Or rather, someone.”

Natalia glanced over to the edge of the pool, the side opposite of Hajime and Saya. Tamami was sitting in the shade, looking very much like a sad child wrapped in her white swimsuit cover.

“I wonder what happened to her? She hasn't said much since she got here… just happy birthday…” Natalia sighed.

“Hajime probably beat her ass.” Ayame guessed. “I would do the same thing… you know how I feel about Hajime, but even then, that post pissed me off like it was written about me.”

“Wow. You're siding with Hajime? Hell must've frozen over.”

“I'm not that bad of a person… and honestly… I think Tamami feels awkward, because we haven't talked in a while. I should tell her that it's okay for her to join us.”

“Good idea. Tamami always needs reassurance. I'll join you guys later… when you flipped the raft over, my earring fell to the bottom of the pool…”

Ayame nodded and the two went their separate ways. Ayame jumped out of the pool and sat down next to Tamami. “Hey Tamami.”

As soon as Tamami heard Ayame's voice, she snapped out of whatever trance she was in. “Ayame?! What do you want with me?”

“What do you mean what do I want with you? You're at my house.”

“I thought… I thought you were done with me… because of what happened with Hajime…”

“Well, I unblocked you…” Ayame admitted. “You should really be nicer to Hajime…”

“I apologized to her!” Tamami told her. “She came by and she… I'm really an idiot… Hajime's an angel… I was horrible to her, but she still…” her voice trailed off. Tamami couldn't communicate what she was trying to say, without exposing who her mother was.

Ayame nodded in agreement. “She's really sweet…”

“The things she said really blew my mind... I made a huge mistake… Hajime said she could forgive me, but I can't forgive myself… I feel awful thinking about what I put her through. I want to be a better person, but can I? Can I move on from doing something like that? It's all I can think about. I'm sorry for ruining the atmosphere.”

“Is that why you're sitting here, in the dark? Hajime seems really happy today. I don't think…”

“No… it's not because of her.” Tamami shook her head. “It's just… you know I tan super easily, and I don't want to get any darker than I already am… I'm not pretty enough as it is, and I definitely won't be pretty with darker skin.”

“Tamami… come on. Don't speak like this. You are not ugly and so what if your complexion is a bit darker? It is one of your charms. There's nothing ugly about having dark skin.” Ayame told her. “Just look at Natalia.”

“You're right. I just need to believe in myself.” Tamami said. “I need to realize that I'm fine just the way I am…”

“Did something happen? This is the first time I've ever heard you talk like this, and it's concerning…”

“Don't worry.” Tamami smiled. “Let's go swimming.”

The two girls jumped into the pool, where Hajime and Saya were holding the raft in place. Natalia was sitting on it, like a queen on a throne.

“So I was thinking about using my blog for social justice purposes…” Saya was saying. “So a friend and I are going to a community meeting. She writes stuff like this all the time, and I want to see how she handles it.”

“I think you'd be able to do it.” Natalia said. “I wonder what kind of stuff happens at a community meeting.”

“Exactly what it sounds like.” Hajime answered. “Community. Meeting.”

“Well you can come with me if you want, Natalia.”

“Hey! Sorry to interrupt this conversation, but look who joined us!” Ayame exclaimed. Tamami waved shyly at the rest of the group. 

“Ah! Great. We should take a group selfie together.” Saya suggested. “To commemorate Natalia's 19th…”

“Good idea.” Natalia agreed. “But what about Hinako?”

“What about her?” Ayame asked. “Saya, get your phone. Let's make this a good shot.”

A few minutes later, the backyard gate swung open, and Hinako walked in, wearing a floral sundress. “I'm here…” she announced, expecting some kind of response. But there wasn't any. Instead, Saya, Hajime, Tamami, Ayame and Natalia had all managed to fit themselves on the raft and were using Saya's phone to take a picture of themselves. 

“Hey… I said…” Hinako began, but she stopped once Saya jumped off the raft and the raft flipped over. The other girls resurfaced, laughing. Hinako felt a pang of jealousy as she watched this. She couldn't join them if she wanted to. Hinako stared down at her tennis bracelet, spacing out until Natalia had walked over.

“You finally made it.” Natalia greeted. “I left your cheesecake in the house. But besides that… we’ve been waiting.”

“Who's we?” Hinako looked over into the pool, her eyes meeting Hajime's. Hinako thought that Hajime looked like a shark, as Hajime's face was halfway under the surface of the water. Hajime glared at Hinako, then she disappeared under the surface.

“Huh? Me, of course. Tamami and Ayame also… and Saya.”

“You're forgetting someone.”

Natalia sighed. “I thought I told you to be on your best behavior. Things were going good… please don't ruin them… out of respect for me. Please…”

“Okay…” Hinako sighed. Surprisingly, she had no intention to mess with Hajime. But Hajime thought differently.

“Oh… I'm surprised that you're here.” Hajime greeted Hinako in a sugary sweet voice, with the fakest smile on her face.

“Why? I'm always here.” Hinako reminded her.

“Yes, but now that you work at Mizuki Department Store, you've been showing off your good work ethic by covering people's shifts. Nanami must be so grateful for you.” Hajime smiled at Hinako. 

“Maybe you could do the same… if your co-workers actually liked you.”

“That implies I need to work.” 

“I don't like where this conversation is going.” Natalia spoke up. “Talk about something else.”

“Oh right. I'm sorry. I came over here because I want to give you your gift.” Hajime walked over to her stuff, then walked back over with a gift bag. “I made it myself… I hope you like it. Also… look on the bottom.”

Natalia slowly dug through the tissue paper, revealing an orange mug. While she thought the mug was pretty, her mind changed once she flipped it over. 

_ Minha quierda amiga, Natalia. _

“Oh my God…” Natalia felt like she was going to cry. “I love this so much… thank you Hajime! I'll treasure it greatly.”

“I'm glad you like it.”

“I'm going to go put this inside. I'll be back.”

Then against her better judgement, Natalia left Hajime and Hinako alone with each other. Hinako was about to go try to talk to Tamami, but she noticed Hajime's eyes on her bracelet. Before Hinako could say anything, Hajime grabbed Hinako's wrist and brought it up to eye level.

“Why are you touching me, you criminal?” Hinako asked through her teeth. She snatched her wrist away.

“I'm surprised that you're still wearing it, since you hate me.” Hajime admitted. 

“You're absolutely right. I don't wear this because I like you… you heard what I said in the changing room - don't make me repeat it.”

Hajime didn't seem to be fazed by Hinako bringing that up. “I'm just glad you aren't wasting my money…” 

“Of course I'm not.” Hinako giggled. “It’s fitting for a princess.”

Hajime bit her tongue. She  _ really _ wanted to share Kaori's article with Hinako, but she couldn't. Not only did she still didn't have proof, but Hajime had to respect Natalia. She couldn't expose Hinako here.

“Yes. I think it fits you very much.” Hajime agreed, smiling. “Excuse me.”

Hajime got back into the pool, leaving Hinako to just sit and watch. She eventually got bored. Feeling very excluded Hinako went into the kitchen. She turned on the small TV that was in there and started eating her cheesecake, daydreaming as the TV told the latest entertainment news to whoever would listen.

It wasn't until a commercial break that Hinako noticed Natalia's gift sitting near her.  _ What a show off,  _ Hinako thought. She stood up and began to examine the mug, not noticing that Saya had entered the room.

“Hey Hinako…” she called out. Hinako placed the mug down, her expression indescribable as she noticed Saya.

“Don't worry about me.” Hinako told her. “I was just about to leave… as in go home. I'm not wanted here.”

“What makes you say that?”

“You guys took the picture without me. Am I that unlikeable? Oh wait… you're Hajime's best friend. Of course you're going to say yes. Well, you're right.”

“I mean… you aren't someone I want to be friends with, but… I noticed that you seem to be excluded, so I wanted to say hi.”

“I can't swim.” Hinako admitted. “I almost drowned in my family's pool when I was six. I was trying to get one of my Barbies out, and I fell in. It scared my parents so much that they never taught me how to swim.”

“But Hajime said you smelled like chlorine on her birthday.” 

“Because Seira pushed me into the pool.” Hinako recalled. 

“Oh…” Saya shook her head. “But if you can't swim… why did you come to a pool party?”

“Because Hajime would always go out of her way to make sure I was included. That was because we were friends. But we aren't anymore… I can't stand her.”

“Is that why you got the bright idea of using her?” Saya asked. 

“...maybe.”

“Look. I don't get your fixation on being a princess, but using others for material gain is not right. Why did you go that far?”

“You know why.” Hinako said bitterly.

“You need to let that go… like… you have the right to be upset, and I would be upset at Hajime too. However, the way you're handling it is…”

“You're biased.” Hinako rolled her eyes. “I don't want to get into this with you. Leave me alone and go talk to Hajime.”

“Fine. Just answer me this - you got into Toho Design School with a full scholarship, right?”

“Yes.”

“They rarely do that, so you must be good.”

“I guess…” Hinako spun around in her dress. “I actually made this!”

Saya smiled at the younger girl. “See? You just proved my point. That dress is really cute, and I would buy it if I saw it in the store. Why do you need design school? You don't need college to be successful… can I tell you something?”

“What is it?” 

“I wanted to be a journalist, like that was my dream.” Saya admitted. “Everyone at my school was rooting for me. I got into college too. Full scholarship. Just like you. However… due to a death in my class - a girl named Yoshino Yorita - I ended up dropping out. My admission was rescinded.”

“What does that mean? And also… aren't you rich? How did you get a full scholarship?”

Saya shook her head. “You're overestimating how well my parents do. I wasn't always like this… my blog made me a lot of money. But to answer your question, it means that since I never graduated, they took their offer back.”

“Ah… really? That's horrible! So…”

“I was upset for a while, but then I realized something, as I was studying for my GED one night. Why should I let a lack of education hold me back from doing what I enjoyed? You don't need a degree to write about what's going on in your life. I opened up Everyday Saya within a week, and started talking what was on my mind.”

“I'm glad that worked out for you…” Hinako said, then she sighed. “The truth is… I'm just lost… ever since Hajime and I went our separate ways, my nightmares have gotten worse. I feel scared of the future. I don't like thinking about such things...”

“We're all lost and scared at some point in our lives. Having anxiety over the future is normal.” Saya told her. “With that being said, the way you're treating Hajime is unacceptable. I really think you would feel better about yourself if you apologized… and Hajime would feel better as well.”

“Do you think so? Do you think I'll be able to sleep well if I apologize?”

“Yeah… but only if you really mean it. I'm sure you're only showing your worst right now. Call me naive, but I believe everyone has a heart, including you. If Hajime treated you like you treated her… how would you feel?” 

Hinako didn't answer it, but the sad look in her eyes was telling. Saya didn't need an answer, so she continued,

“Finally, I've been meaning to tell you this for a while. You shouldn't let your desire for materials drive you… pretty dresses and fancy dolls. It's okay to like things but they shouldn't be your sole motivation, you know?”

Hinako shook her head. “That's not it… you're wrong…”

“I am? But I thought you wanted to be a princess for those reasons…”

“No… you’re wrong…” Hinako's voice trailed off. She shut her eyes, and Saya got the feeling that she was hiding something. However, Hinako didn't say anything else. The room was silent, except for the TV.

_ “As it was reported before the commercial break… we were told that top star Misa Wakita has a child, despite her childfree stance…” _

Saya, fearing the worst, decided to end the conversation with Hinako and turn the TV up. Her heart was racing - she couldn't forget Tamami and Misa's conversation.

The reporters kept going.

“ _ Her name is Tamami Wakiyama… here's a picture. _ ” Saya flinched as Tamami's Facebook picture was shown on the screen. _ “She's 19 years old and a university dropout.” _

_ “Ah… 19? She looks nine. I can tell by her picture she's really short… she also seems to resemble her father, whoever it may be. She's the opposite of Misa, although I can see some of her in Tamami.” _

_ “Don't worry. Another source came forward and told us… he was the casting director for one of Misa's movies. She was 19 when Tamami was born. This was confirmed with a copy of Tamami's birth certificate.” _

_ “Oh yikes!” _

Saya quickly cut off the TV. Yikes was exactly right. Someone in the cafe must've overheard and went to the press, Saya figured. However, Hinako took the news a bit differently.

“Tamami is the daughter of Misa Wakita…” Hinako repeated, then she lit up. “That means that she's an actual princess! Oh wow!”

“Hinako, wait!” 

But Hinako didn't wait. She ran outside, not stopping until she was in front of Tamami, who was talking with everyone else.

“Tamami, why didn't you tell us?” Hinako asked, interrupting the conversation.

“What are you talking about?” Natalia asked. “Hinako, Ayame was speaking. Don't interrupt her.”

Hinako ignored her. “Tamami… I never would've guessed that your mom is Misa Wakita. You're a princess! Why didn't you tell us?”

“Wait… what?” Ayame's eyes were huge. “Tamami…”

“I have no idea what she's talking about.” Tamami said quickly. “Hinako, please keep your wild delusions to yourself. Look at her and look at me. Do we seem related?”

“Unfortunately…” Saya spoke up. “It's not a wild delusion… the TV… they were reporting it, and…”

“Oh no.” Hajime said dryly. However, her sarcastic response was eclipsed by Tamami jumping out of her chair and grabbing her things.

“I need to go, I need to go…” Tamami kept saying. Then, without a single goodbye, she ran out of the yard.

“Tamami, wait!” Ayame tried running after her, but since Ayame was barefoot, she didn't get very far. “Tamami!!”

“I wonder why she chose to kept that secret.” Natalia mused.

“I don't think she and her mom get along.” Hinako admitted. “I feel bad for her… they put her picture on TV! I hope she'll be alright…”

“Me too.” Hajime agreed, trying her hardest to remain serious. But deep inside, Hajime was super excited, proud of herself, even.

The party was over… for Tamami that is.

xxxxx

While the party was over for Tamami, things were just getting started for Hajime. Just as it was planned, Hajime was going to spend July 1st with Kaori. Kaori had given Hajime an address, which was her house. Outside, the house was nothing special, but on the inside, it was decorated like a dollhouse. The aesthetic was very elegant, Hajime observed. It fit a girl like Kaori, who appeared to be elegant and classy. Hajime actually felt very embarrassed - maybe she should've dressed up?

Or not. The two girls were sitting in Kaori's living room, a tray of butter cookies between them. With the way Kaori was smiling at her, Hajime might've jumped the gun.

“I'm sorry I couldn't have responded to your message sooner.” Kaori apologized. “I was busy getting things ready for a meeting. So I take it you read my article?”

“Yes… it was… a lot.” Hajime sighed. “It sounds bad, but I just can't fathom that someone would be so evil… 600 people dead…”

Kaori sighed. “They say you shouldn't speak ill of the dead, but this isn't speaking ill of the dead. I'm sharing facts… the reason why I wrote that article in the first place was because my father worked with Yusuke Kita. They were business partners. However, my dad fell ill, so he gave his plans to him.”

“The plans for the buildings?”

“Yes.” Kaori nodded. “Originally, the department store was meant to be a low rise apartment building - my father's vision was to build affordable housing for everyone. Besides that, the land was not fitting for anything besides a small three story building … everyone knew that. With Yusuke in charge, he decided to change the apartment building into a huge luxury department store… about a block long. He wanted it to be six stories tall, with restaurants and an ice skating rink on the top floor.”

“That sounds…” Hajime's voice trailed off. 

“The plan had to be heavily edited before any reputable construction company took the project on. He purposely requested cheap materials be used… not to mention many support columns had to be cut, to make room for the escalators and elevators. But like I said, all the reputable companies rejected it. He wasn't willing to pay more…”

“Even though it would be dangerous otherwise?”

“Yes… he ended up bribing a smaller company and they went through with it. This was thirteen years ago. The department store lasted for two years - and it was grand. They would get 30,000 visitors a day. A lot of people in that neighborhood worked there too. However… around the 18th month mark, people began to notice strange things.”

“Such as?”

“Employees would notice cracks forming in the ceilings. Customers would claim to hear the building shift, like it was moving. The building appeared to be slanting on certain floors. I remember the very last time I was there - about a month before the collapse. I dropped my pen by accident on the 6th floor, in the food court. It started rolling away from me, and that's when I noticed how messed up the foundation was. It was like my pen was rolling down a hill. I told my friend that day I got a bad feeling and would never come back. My friend, Tsumugi, thought I was full of shit. Unfortunately, I wasn't.”

“Oh no… did she die in the collapse?”

“No. The collapse was on a Sunday evening - the store wasn't as crowded as it could've been. The roof caved in. I've talked to people who were trapped for days… they said the rescue efforts were suspended - and in those days, more people died. The death toll would've been way lower if not for that…”

“Why was it suspended?” Hajime asked. 

“Yusuke meddled into the operation. Once again, he bribed the chief of emergency services. He wanted to keep the number low - and that's what the news reported. That only 10 people died.” Kaori laughed derisively. “Of course, locals didn't believe it. I didn't believe it and I was 16. Turns out he covered it up.”

“But why? Why cover it up?”

“Because his reputation.” Kaori sighed. “He kept putting buildings up. The next thing that happened was a few months later… the fire at Sky Apartments. By this point, my father's health had deteriorated so much that he signed the building over to Yusuke Kita.”

“I'm not liking the sound of this.”

“Yes. He increased the rent, displacing several residents. They were actually the lucky ones. Why did he do that? He did it to fund renovations, but he was looking to maximize profit. So… the renovations amounted to him significantly downgrading the fire alarms and sprinkler system. He ignored the complaints about the electrical issues as well.”

“That sounds like it should be illegal.”

“It definitely is. But to distract the residents, he replaced the cladding on the building - to make it look attractive to potential residents. However… the cladding he used was inexpensive, but extremely flammable. So… someone plugged in a hair dryer into a defective outlet, and … the rest was history.”

“No way… were people able to get out?”

“This happened at 2 am on a Wednesday. Most people were sleeping, and since the fire alarms failed to go off, most people were alerted of the fire by others running and knocking on the doors. The death toll was fairly high… about half of the residents perished… around 100.”

“Holy shit… and I guess Mr. Kita tried acting as though everything was normal…?”

“Yes. My poor father had a heart attack though when he heard… Yusuke successfully blamed him for both the fire and the collapse. The effect of the heart attack was irreversible, but in a lucid moment on his deathbed, he blew the whistle. Told my mom to call the news reporters in. He was not going to die accused of something he didn't do, so he exposed Yusuke in a 30 minute press conference, from the hospital. That was one of the most intense moments of my life. He died two days later…”

“But you said in the article that Yusuke avoided justice?”

“Yeah… he maintained innocence… while simultaneously throwing everyone else involved under the bus. Bribes were rampant. Threats were exchanged. The trial was thrown out without a second thought. He tried building another department store where the old department store used to be - but he died. That area is now a memorial garden. That man was truly, and I mean, truly evil.”

Hajime nodded. There was really no other word fitting for him. All this time she thought her scammer “parents” were the worst of the worst, but Hinako's father had quite the body count. But that was her father. What about her mother? Hajime had to ask, without making it obvious what she was doing.

“What about his wife? And didn't he have a daughter too?”

Kaori frowned. “Ah… yes. I can speak personally here, since this kind of thing had no place in the article… but I'm glad that she's free of his presence. Arisa Kita was really pitiful, to the very end.”

“Pitiful?”

“Yes. The longer I knew her, the less happier she looked. She knew first-hand that her husband was a piece of shit, but… she always stood by his side. I felt weird, Arisa would try very hard to befriend me, a then teenage old girl. Now that I think about it, she wasn't very popular… all she had was Hinako, who she thought was way too young to understand…”

“Understand what?”

Kaori shook her head. “She never actually explained - I'm guessing about the things Yusuke had done. But… Arisa at least had a sense of humanity. You won't find anything about them, because Yusuke wiped them out of existence, but she let a pair of twins stay with them… Serika and Seito. They were six year olds who lost their parents in the fire. Yusuke was not happy about this. The way he treated them compared to Hinako was really… extreme.”

“So… what about Hinako?” Hajime asked. 

“What about her? She was just a normal little girl… she changed a bit though… she got super obsessed with becoming a princess like right before she died. It was weird. Hinako liked that kind of stuff before, but something must have happened - Hinako seemed to space out more, and she stopped eating normally. She slept a lot too. I'm not a psychologist, but it seemed like she was depressed? Traumatized? I felt bad for her and Arisa, not to mention the twins. They had to live with that evil man…”

Hajime didn't know what to think. She had thought Hinako wanted to be a princess because Hinako missed her childhood and her life as the daughter of a rich family. But if Hinako had been acting like that before the fire, maybe Hajime was wrong. On a completely different note, Hajime could've told Kaori that Hinako was still alive, but she had a different plan.

“You said that there was some kind of group for the survivors and families of the victims?” Hajime asked.

“Yes. The group was formed once everything was revealed - the purpose was to get Yusuke Kita into jail… but when that failed they started demanding financial compensation. Of course, when his entire family died, there was nothing they could do. We are now an emotional support group, to be the family for those who lost theirs in one of those incidents… we meet every month.”

“Well, if it's okay with you, I would like to attend… may I speak at this meeting? I want to talk about Yoshino.”

“Sure! I will give you the details. We look forward to welcoming you into our family.” Kaori smiled warmly at Hajime, who did the same. On the surface, it seemed like Hajime was trying to receive comfort and closure related to her missing cousin. 

The truth was way darker.

xxxxx

“I told Hinako that I want to meet with her… to apologize. I think I'm ready.” Hajime told Saya the next day. The two were at Hajime's house, Hajime watching as Saya flipped through the TV guide. “I was going to apologize to her at the party, but I wasn't ready. So I'm going to meet with her tomorrow.”

“Hinako agreed to that?”

“Surprisingly…” Hajime nodded. She wasn't going to tell Saya that she told Hinako that she had a surprise for her. Of course, materialistic Hinako immediately was on board. 

“Well, tomorrow I'm going to go visit my friend's grave.” Saya admitted. “Tomorrow is her birthday, July 3rd. It's always an emotional experience, because I miss her, and I have regrets I need to let go of. I hope your experience with Hinako goes better.”

“It's Hinako.”

“Hm… I talked to her at Natalia's party… she seemed a little withdrawn…”

“She probably felt left out because she can't swim.” Hajime said. “Poor baby.”

Saya was taken aback by Hajime's sarcasm, but she tried not to show it. “We didn't really talk much, because of the TV report on Tamami, but she called herself unlikeable. I think this is the first time Hinako has been honest with herself. I wonder if she's maturing?”

“She was probably being manipulative. Don't think much of it… Hinako likes guilt tripping people, she'll do whatever she can to be coddled. Don't fall for it.”

“I didn't coddle her.” Saya shook her head. “But acceptance is only the first step… so I wonder...”

“Shut up, Saya.” Hajime snapped. “I didn't invite you over here to hear about her.”

“Okay… okay… sorry.” Saya turned her attention back to the TV. She wondered why Hajime reacted like that - Hajime was the one who brought up Hinako in the first place. However, she wasn't going to press further. Especially since Saya noticed something interesting on TV.

“Ayame’s show just came on. Let's watch it… I'm in the mood to buy something.”

“Do what you want.” Hajime grumbled. She hadn't really been paying attention to the TV. Hajime's attention was split between reading the latest issue of Ceramics Monthly, and eating some chocolate she had bought from a nearby convenience store.

“Okay.” Saya put Ayame's show on, but the two got a surprise. Instead of Ayame standing there, there was a brown haired girl. 

“Good afternoon everyone. I'm Karin Domyoji and I'm covering for Ayame today. She will be off the air for an indefinite amount of time, due to a personal issue. I will do my best to make up for her absence. Please treat me well.”

“Karin?” Hajime repeated. “We went to high school together. I didn't know she broadcasted…”

“I wonder what happened to Ayame.” Saya said, reaching for her phone. “This so concerning… what happened that she had to go on an indefinite hiatus? I hope she's alright.”

“She will be fine. Don't waste your energy caring. Do you think she'd do the same for you?”

“Yes, she would. And she has.”

“And she has.” Hajime said mockingly, then she muttered. “You're such a stupid, self-righteous bitch. I can't stand it.”

Saya's reddish brown eyes got bigger. “ _ What  _ did you just call me?”

“Oh no, did you hear that?” Hajime asked dryly. “It must have slipped out. I'm  _ so  _ sorry.”

“Excuse me? What's gotten into you today?” Saya asked. “I don't like your attitude.”

“Then leave. Get out.” Hajime ordered, standing up and snatching the remote from Saya. “I don't need you like you think I do.” 

She turned off the TV and was about to physically throw Saya out, but before she could, the doorbell rang. Hajime set the remote down and walked to the intercom, staring at who it was. Ayame and Tamami were standing there, Tamami holding onto Ayame's arm, as Ayame spoke to her in a low voice - it was so low that Hajime couldn't hear what she was saying. Tamami was wearing sunglasses and a cotton face mask too, Hajime noticed.

Hajime didn't say anything, but she opened the door. The two girls walked in, Tamami using Ayame as a way to hide her limp. The four stared at each other awkwardly, until Saya spoke first. “Is everything alright? We saw Karin covering for you…”

“No.” Tamami removed the face mask, revealing her swollen mouth. The mask also obscured a nasty bruise on her face. Then she took off her sunglasses, showing off a black eye. Saya gasped once she noticed, and Hajime excused herself. Tamami began to cry softly to herself. “It's all my fault… I should've stayed quiet… why am I so stupid, choosing to meet her in public?”

“Please don't blame yourself.” Ayame told her. “It's not your fault.”

“What happened?” Saya asked. “This must have something to do with the news… what happened after Tamami ran off from the party?”

“I went over her apartment and she told me everything… I let Tamami spend the night over my house for a few days… but we had to go back to get her clothes… Tamami went inside while I stood by the elevator as a look out. But…”

“She was in the apartment… waiting for me.” Tamami said, sniffling. “She started beating me with a pan. I ran out and she chased me into the stairwell, I tried defending myself, but she threw me down the steps… five flights of stairs. I don't know what happened, but I woke up in the hospital, Ayame looking over me and crying.”

“We spent the last 24 hours in the hospital.” Ayame reported. “Tamami no longer has access to her apartment, as the locks were changed. She's basically homeless now and will be staying with me for the time being. We were filing a police report before coming over here.”

“Great, it's not a good idea for Tamami to be on her own with Misa at large. I'll help out too.” Saya said. “And Hajime… huh? Where did she go?”

“I wanted to come here and your house because I really need to ask you guys something… I know that you don't like me… did you tell the media…?”

“No! Of course not.” Saya frowned. “It's true, I hated your online behavior, but I wouldn't risk your life like this. I'm sure Hajime is the same…”

“I need to ask her myself… I don't think she did, but I'm paranoid. Where is she?”

“You're still here.” Hajime walked back out, holding a glass of water. “I got this for you.”

Tamami did not accept the glass of water. “Hajime… please tell me honestly. Did you tell anyone about what happened in the cafe? I know you're really upset about being outed, so you have the motive. Please tell me the truth. I won't be mad… really.”

“I told you… I was going to respect your secret, even though you couldn't respect mine.” Hajime reminded her. “I'm really sorry this happened to you. It was probably someone else in the cafe…”

“Probably.” Tamami put her sunglasses back on. “Ayame, let's go back to your house. These painkillers are kicking in and I'm starting to feel tired.”

“Okay.”

Tamami walked outside, and Ayame would've followed, but instead, she had something to say. Once Tamami was out of earshot, she said,

“I don't know why, but I get the feeling that one of you is lying. Especially the one that's always oh so nice…”

“Saya would never do something like that.” Hajime said.

“But  _ you _ would.” Ayame pointed an accusatory finger at Hajime. “Let find out that either one of you snitched. I'll gut your ass.”

Before Hajime or Saya could say anything else, Ayame turned on her heels and left the two girls alone. Saya began to put her shoes on.

“You didn't expose Tamami, did you?” she asked.

“No. I swear on my life.” Hajime answered. “Did you?”

“No…”

“I don't know… your blog gives you connections with so many people… I hope I'm wrong.” Hajime smiled. “So… now what?”

“I think I'm going to go home now.” Saya told her. “I'll see you later, okay?”

“Fine.” Hajime let Saya out. As soon as Hajime was in the house alone, she laughed. The sound filled up the empty house, echoing down the halls. She had been trying to hold it in earlier, which was why she disappeared into the kitchen, but now that everyone was gone, she had no reason to hide it. Seeing Tamami in that state had put Hajime on top of the world - Tamami's tears were worth it. Not to mention her pain. Hajime could only imagine how great she would feel tomorrow.

For the first time in a long time, Hajime was excited to meet with Hinako.

* * *

* * *

 


	13. XIII

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> grab ya night lights bc this shit gets quite dark... yet another cw for abuse

XIII

“I'm so glad that you could meet with me today… is there anything that you want? I'll treat you…” 

“Hm… it's really hot outside, but I want a hot chocolate. Is that weird?” Hinako giggled.

“No. Wait here.”

The afternoon of July 3rd was really hot, reaching 35 degrees Celsius. Hajime's time living without air conditioning had prepared her well, the heat barely bothered her. Hinako was different, she had brought a lacy fan with her. Yet she wanted a hot chocolate. The two were at Hinako's favorite cafe, which Hajime chose on purpose - she wanted to scare Hinako off from ever coming here again.

_ I hope she passes out from heat stroke,  _ Hajime thought as she ordered the hot chocolate. 

Surprisingly, Hajime wasn't feeling as vindictive as she thought she was, but that changed once she got the hot chocolate - the barista today was feeling quite artistic with the cream… she drew at heart on top of the drink. Hajime felt exposed, so when she thought no one was looking, she grabbed Hinako's hot chocolate, took it over to the condiments table in the corner, and spat into the drink. Then she walked back over to Hinako, a huge smile on her face.

“Here you go.” 

“Wow… the heart is so cute.” Hinako observed, then she giggled. “Did you request that design?”

“You should drink it before it gets cold.”

“Good idea.” Hinako drank a bit, then she set her mug down, looking a little disturbed. “This tastes a bit off…”

“Ah… don't worry about it.” Hajime laughed a bit. “The barista told me that they changed the recipe.”

Hinako didn't seem to be buying it. She pushed her drink in the middle of the table. “I don't know…”

“Aren't you curious as to why I called you here today?” Hajime asked. 

“Of course. You said you had something for me…”

“Don't be let down, but it isn't a gift.” Hajime sighed. “I actually wanted to apologize…”

“For destroying my stuff?” Hinako looked surprised.

“No.” Hajime shook her head, then reached into her bag. She pulled out a manila folder. “I'm sorry, Hinako. I'm sorry that you are not the princess you thought you are.”

“Huh?”

Hajime handed Hinako the folder. Hinako carefully opened it, as if she was handling a bomb. Inside was a news article - Hinako read it, then she closed the folder. Her face had paled over and her hands were shaking.

“What do I have to do with any of this?”

“What were your parents names?”

“Yusuke and Arisa…” Hinako quickly shook her head. “No. No! How dare you accuse my father of doing something like this? He wouldn't… he was a good person!”

“Good person? Do you even know the meaning of the word? Like father, like daughter. He wanted money so bad, he hurt 1,506 people. You want to be a princess so badly… do I even need to tell you what you did?”

“I didn't kill anybody!”

“Yet.” Hajime smiled at Hinako. “Looks like I'm not the only one with dirty blood. Oh wait… I'm not the daughter of criminals. You are.”

“I am not! Don't you dare… you have to be scamming me.” Hinako started laughing. “That's it! You're scamming me.”

“I value my life too much to try to scam a murderer.” Hajime told her. “What does the last sentence say? How old were you when the house burned down? Eight, right? Unfortunately, you aren't dead… but I guess it's a good thing you're alive. The victims will be very glad to learn that you're here. So how are you going to take responsibility?”

Hinako didn't answer. Hajime kept going. 

“It's also said that your family isn't as perfect as you think they are… did your parents love each other? Did they love you?”

“Of course they did. You're just jealous.” Hinako snapped. “My father loved my mother very much. He wasn't the type to do whatever lies you're spreading. He was a good man. He never hurt me or my mom!”

“I never said anything about him hurting you or your mom.” Hajime said, smiling. “I wonder what the twins would say. Would they, outsiders, agree with what you are saying? I know they aren't your siblings.”

“Don't drag Serika and Seito into this! They'd agree with me, because they  _ were  _ my siblings! We all got along well… there was nothing wrong with my family. Nothing! We were happy…”

“Why are you so defensive? Do you know something that I don't? Let's speak as friends. Tell me.”

Hinako slammed her fists down on the table, her face burgundy. Hajime watched with wide eyes as some of the hot chocolate spilled onto the table. 

“We aren't friends. Don't ever say something like that again. He loved us. He loved me… he was a good person. This article?” Hinako picked up the article and threw it at Hajime. “This article is fake. This incident didn't happen - and if it did, I refuse to take responsibility.”

“Your behavior isn't very princesslike.” Hajime said. “But I'll stop here, because I don't want you to kill me. What I will say is… despite your father being a notorious criminal… I'll still be your friend. After all, I know how it feels. Except… unlike you, my delusions of my perfect family weren't shattered.”

“Calling my memories delusions? Fuck you. You didn't shatter anything. Because none of this happened, you liar.”

“Would you tell this to the victims?”

“Of course.” Hinako said. “Because my father had nothing to do with this.”

“If you say so.” Hajime shrugged, then she smiled. “If you need any tips on how to survive unfair persecution… feel free to call me. From one daughter of criminals to another. Oh wait…”

“Leave me alone, you sick fuck. I'm out of here!” Hinako shouted, running out of the cafe. Of course, Hinako and Hajime's conversation had attracted the attention of everyone in the cafe. Not that Hajime cared - if everything went to plan, everyone would know that Hinako Kita was the daughter of a murderer.

xxxxx

1,506 people… 1,506 people… Hinako couldn't take it. After Hajime revealed everything, she couldn't calm down. Hinako's hands would not stop shaking - she couldn't even stick her bus card into the fare reader. 

“She's lying… she's lying…” Hinako told herself. “There's no way… my dad was a good person. He loved my mom. He loved me. He loved Serika and Seito… my family was perfect… Hajime is just jealous…”

Hinako tried to spend the rest of the bus ride daydreaming, but she couldn't focus on anything. Once she got home, she ended up staring out of the window, but that was interrupted by a text message from Hajime.

“Don't worry, I won't tell anyone. I promise.”

Hinako ignored the message, which did very little in terms of comforting her. She turned her phone off, and then walked over to her dresser, staring at her picture. Hinako had been able to tape half of her picture back together, at least, the part with her and her mom. 

“It's unrelated. My dad did own buildings, but he had nothing to do with the incidents.” Hinako announced. “It was just a bad coincidence. That article is fake. It has to be… right?”

Hinako walked over to her bed and fell onto it, staring at the newest doll she bought, which she affectionately dubbed Elizabeth 2.0. Hinako was fortunate for her, because there was no way in hell that she was going to tell this to Natalia, Ayame, Tamami or Saya. She could only hope that Hajime kept her word.

“Everyone is out to get me.” Hinako told her. “Hajime is so jealous… she can't stand it. How dare she try to pass those weird rumors off as the truth? Trying to pin the crime on my dead father… claiming he was abusive. Trying to say I'm responsible for everything. She's nothing but an evil witch. But the princess will win. Good always prevails. Right?”

Hinako rolled over on her back, staring up at the ceiling fan. Now that she thought about it, her childhood bedroom had a ceiling fan in it too. When she was younger, Hinako liked to just stare at it, because she found the appliance hypnotizing… it made her tired. Feeling worn out, Hinako began to doze off...

xxxxx

_ 11 years ago, _

Eight year old Hinako laid on her bed, staring up at the ceiling fan. There was a picture book beside her, but Hinako set it down. The story was Sleeping Beauty, which Hinako liked… the idea of sleeping for a long time, and then waking up to see all your problems were fixed, was very appealing. If she could be a fictional character, Hinako would definitely be her.

The only problem was, Hinako wasn't sure about the 'true love's kiss’ part. What was true love? Most people could look to their parents as a healthy relationship, but Hinako couldn't. She hadn't really noticed it, until after what happened two summers ago, when Hinako had fallen into the pool. Her mother was supposed to be supervising her, but Arisa wasn't paying attention, as Yusuke had dragged her away from the pool and into the house.

As for Hinako, she had accidentally dropped one of her Barbies into the deeper end. The doll floated near the edge, so Hinako thought she could reach it… only for her to lose her balance and fall into 8 feet of water. 

Hinako had woken up in her bedroom, but she had a very interesting dream. 

“It's all your fault. Are you trying to kill my daughter?” her father sounded very angry. “Is this your way of putting me in my place?”

“What are you talking about? I would never do something like that. Accidents happen, and we should be fortunate I was able to get her out in time.” Arisa's voice was the exact opposite. She seemed calm, if not a little fearful. 

“I don't like your attitude. What kind of mother are you? You have the easiest job on the planet, and you can't even do that.”

“Please… not in front of Hinako.”

“For all we know, she could have brain damage! My heir could be ruined! What are you? Stupid? Everyone knows you don't leave an unsupervised child by the pool!”

“Yusuke, please quiet down. Hinako is resting, and…”

“Don't tell me to quiet down, you stupid bitch!” 

As everything was black, Hinako couldn't see anything, but she could hear her father slap her mother, who started crying. There was the sound of someone being forced out, and the door closing. Hinako woke up a few hours later, feeling a little sick. She went downstairs, only for her mom and dad to be surprised that she was alright. Hinako really wanted to bring up the dream, because it felt real, but seeing how happy her parents looked, there was no way.

But now, two years later, Hinako was starting to realize that her mom seemed different. She didn't seem very happy, and she was smaller… thinner. Her teeth seemed different too, as she now had a lisp. Hinako's classmates at school would talk about their mothers having friends, but from Hinako could see, Arisa had no friends. Besides that, she randomly chopped her hair off in the middle of the night. Hinako felt happy seeing this; now she and her mom had matching haircuts! But what Hinako didn't like was that her mom would disappear for several days at a time, because she was “sick” or “resting”. Kaori, the daughter of her dad's business partner, would occasionally babysit her, but it wasn't the same.

Hinako jumped off of the bed and went downstairs, to the kitchen. Arisa was boiling milk for hot chocolate, while also serving peanut butter and celery to Serika and Seito, watching as the twins stacked their peanut butter filled celery with raisins. They looked very happy… until they noticed Hinako standing there. Seito protectively grabbed a hold of his sister's arm.

“Come on Serika. Let's go.”

“Okay.” Serika said. “Thank you for the snacks, Mrs. Kita.”

“Where are you guys going?” Arisa asked. 

“Away.” Seito answered, then he pointed at Hinako. “Mr. Kita said we aren't allowed to be around her.”

“Yes. Mr. Kita is very scary when he is mad.” Serika smiled at Hinako. “We will be gone soon.”

The two began to leave, but Arisa stopped them. “Kids, sit back down. Hinako, come here and join us.”

“Is it okay? I'm scared.” Serika asked as Hinako sat down at the table.

“Don't be scared. We are all a family here. Don't be rude, Hinako. Say hello.”

“Hello everyone.” Hinako said. She had no idea what was going on. At this point, the twins had been staying with Hinako's family for three months. The first month was fine, with Hinako and the twins playing together. They really enjoyed playing hide and seek in the rose garden. However… after the first month, things changed. The twins suddenly became withdrawn, and they stopped speaking to Hinako.

“Now that everyone is here, does anyone want to hear a story?” Arisa asked. 

“Yes!” Hinako, Seito and Serika cheered. They all loved hearing Arisa's stories, however, this story wasn't going to be told.

“Once upon a time…” Arisa began, but that's all she could get out. Yusuke had walked into the kitchen, his face hardening once he noticed Hinako's proximity to the twins.

“My, my… what on Earth is going on here? I thought I told you two to stay away from my daughter? What are you two doing here anyway? You know the rules. Basement.”

The twins quickly jumped out of their chairs and began to make their way to the basement. However, that wasn't good enough. Yusuke grabbed Serika by her arm, nearly dislocating the six year old's shoulder. 

“You can go up to the attic. I'll deal with you both separately.”

“Yusuke, please…” Arisa spoke up.

“Yusuke, please what? I told you. You bring these animals into our home… you deal with how I want to treat them.”

“At least let them be together… please.” 

“Fine. Serika, Seito, get out of my sight.” 

The two ran into the basement. Hinako got the idea to try to follow them, but Yusuke stopped her.

“Where do you think you're going? I came home early because I wanted to spend some time with my little girl.”

“I want to play with Serika and Seito.” Hinako told him. 

“You shouldn't be spending time with those people. They will poison your mind.”

“Those people? Poison?” Arisa repeated. “Honey, you're encouraging discrimination. Please don't be like that. Think about what you're teaching Hinako…”

“Shut the hell up. I'm teaching her not to be like you, taking pity on the less fortunate.” Yusuke turned his attention back to Hinako. “How about you go upstairs and put your jacket on? I'll take you out to get a new doll to play with…”

“I want to play with Seito and Serika. Playing by myself is boring! I don't want to play with my dolls anymore. I want to play with my siblings!”

“What? What did you just say?” Yusuke walked over to Hinako, bringing her face to his. He squeezed her jaw so hard, it hurt. “Siblings? They'll never be a part of our family. Don't you ever say that again. You've been a good girl this entire time… Don't be like your mother and start misbehaving. Listen to what I am saying.”

Hinako nodded, feeling very scared. “Yes Papa.”

“Good. Go upstairs. We'll be leaving in an hour.”

Hinako went upstairs and grabbed her jacket. She went back to the kitchen, only to see that Yusuke had grabbed Arisa by her hair.

“You… you have no idea what kind of stress I'm under, but instead of being a good wife, you only do things to stress me out even further.”

“Come clean.” Arisa told him. “The truth will set you free. Don't hide behind your sins. Let go of me. Let go of me!”

“Be quiet!” Yusuke slapped his wife. “You act like you're such a saint. It's sickening!”

“Nothing is as sickening as someone who hurts the vulnerable, and I'm not just talking about me.” Arisa said. “I'm going to take Hinako and leave. Your lust for power is going to ruin our daughter! I will not allow you to ruin her life like you ruined mine!”

“I don't know what's funnier. The fact that you think I ruined your life, when I saved you, or the fact that you think you're going to leave. You're hardly self sufficient. You're stupid and talentless… what can you do? You can't even raise Hinako correctly.”

“I will find a way. I will go back to school and finish studying apparel design. I don't care if my quality of life gets downgraded. Some things aren't worth it … I'm going to file for a divorce. I can't do this anymore!”

“Fine. File for divorce. But I want custody of Hinako.”

“No way. No way. I won't allow it.” It was then that Arisa noticed Hinako standing there. “Oh my God… Hinako…”

“Oh you won't? Come here, Hinako.” Yusuke commanded. Hinako walked over, and Yusuke crouched down to his daughter, grabbing a knife out of a drawer. He held the knife up to Hinako's throat, paying no mind to the fact that his daughter was now shaking and that her eyes had filled up with tears. “Tell your mother not to go anywhere, unless you want us both to die.”

“Mama…” Hinako begged. “Please…”

“...Okay.” Arisa said finally. “I will stay here as your wife.”

“That's what I thought.” Yusuke said, setting the knife down, then he eyed the milk boiling on the stove. He walked over to it, and turned the stove off. Arisa walked over to Hinako and hugged her tightly. Hinako had no idea what she could do, she felt helpless. 

That feeling increased tenfold when Yusuke threw the boiling milk onto Arisa's back. 

xxxxx

Later that night, Hinako was playing with her Barbies, trying her hardest to forget about her mother's screaming. She wanted to forget… so earlier she had tried reading.  Hinako chose Cinderella, but this time, she was fixated on the picture of Cinderella living happily ever on the final page.

_ Princesses are always so happy. They always have a happy ending… _ Hinako had thought.  _ If I become a princess, will I get a happy ending too? I just want my mom and dad to be happy… _

That was hours ago. Now, Arisa had limped into Hinako's room, holding a tray of food. She had noticed how Hinako barely ate during dinner, which she attributed to Yusuke's presence at the table. He kept talking to Hinako as if nothing had happened earlier, but Arisa knew better. She could see how uncomfortable Hinako was.

Hinako was sitting on the floor, in front of her doll house. Sometimes Arisa would play with her, but most of the time, Arisa would just ask Hinako what kind of things her dolls were doing. Arisa was about to ask what was going on, but she soon got her answer.

All the color drained from her face once she saw Hinako make the Ken doll slap one of the Barbies in the kitchen of the house. Two of the child dolls were tied together with a ribbon in the attic, while another child doll was stuffed into the oven.

“You can't leave! You're my wife! If you leave I will burn Jurina, and she will die! ” Hinako had said in the deepest voice she could muster. Arisa set the tray down, and ran over to her daughter. Ignoring the pain from her burn wounds, she snatched the dolls away from Hinako.

“I think that's enough dolls for tonight. Come on. I brought you dinner.”

“But I'm not hungry…” Hinako told her. “I don't want to eat.”

“You have to eat… come on.”

Arisa watched as Hinako slowly ate the dinner. Hinako was quiet, but Arisa was in the mood to talk. She noticed one of the picture books on the desk, but it was laying down so she couldn't see the cover.

“What were you reading earlier?” Arisa asked.

“Cinderella.”

“Ah…”

“Do you think Cinderella's father hit her mother…?”

“Hinako.” Arisa hugged her daughter tightly. “I'm so sorry… I'm such a bad mother… please try to forget about what happened today… I'm really sorry that happened…”

“Don’t worry. I know what I want to be when I grow up. It will fix everything!” Hinako announced.

“Eh?”

“I want to be a princess.” Hinako said. “They're always so happy… if I can become a princess, we will all be happy. Serika and Seito will allowed out of the basement, and we can play together. Papa will be nicer to you too. So how can I become one?”

Arisa shook her head, trying her hardest not to cry. “Hinako… I can't help you with that. But what I can help you with is helping you be self sufficient… I don't want you to be like me… trapped in this kind of situation. Tomorrow… I will teach you how to sew. I'll teach you more things as you get older, but I'll start with that. I want you to be able to leave here and never look back when you turn 18.”

“Okay…” Hinako's voice trailed off. Eighteen seemed so far off. “But what about Papa?”

“What about him?” Arisa wiped her eyes. “Please don't emulate your father's behavior. It's wrong. Don't hurt others who can't defend themselves. Don't hurt others period. If you do something wrong, take responsibility. Just please… hold yourself accountable. No matter what. Remember that. I love you, Hinako.”

“I love you too.”

xxxxx

Back in the present, Hinako had woken up, soaked in sweat and feeling nauseated. Was her dream really a dream? Or was it real life? It was a memory that Hinako had thought she forced herself to forget, but Hinako forced herself to believe that it was a fictional nightmare. Her mother and father loved each other! There was no building collapse, and there was no fire. Everything was fake. Everything! Nothing was real!

Hinako got out of the bed and stared at the picture of her and Arisa on her dresser.

_ “Please don't emulate your father's behavior. It's wrong. Don't hurt others who can't defend themselves. Don't hurt others period. If you do something wrong, take responsibility. Just please… hold yourself accountable. No matter what. Remember that. I love you, Hinako.” _

“I'm sorry.” Hinako whispered. “I'm sorry I can't take responsibility, but I can't accept something that didn't happen.”

xxxxx

A few days had passed since Hajime had “exposed” Hinako, and truth was, she felt great. Hinako, wherever she was, was probably taking the news very badly… not that Hajime cared.  _ “I'm a princess! My family is made up of upstanding citizens! My blood is clean, unlike you, the daughter of scammers!”  _ Hajime laughed as she thought about Hinako, crying and taking part in her self destructive eating habits. Maybe her nightmares would get worse?

Hajime needed to find out, but not through Hinako. She picked up her phone, and started to dial Natalia's number…

Meanwhile, on the other end of town, Natalia and Saya were shopping for clothes, but not for themselves. They were in the petites section, trying to figure out what Tamami would like.

“Her sense of style is hard to describe. Maybe we should get her a gift card?” Natalia suggested.

“That's a good idea, but Ayame said she's still recovering from her injuries… we should let her rest.” Saya said. “But we should include the receipt.”

“Most definitely.” Natalia agreed. “Tamami always has to get get clothes taken back, because she's so short…”

“I wonder why she doesn't ask Hinako to alter the clothes for her?”

“Huh? What about her?”

“She can sew. Remember that dress she was wearing at your party? She made that.”

“Seriously? Oh yeah… I always forget that Hinako can sew and make her own clothes… usually when I think of Hinako… I don't think of that. Just her daydreaming about being a princess.” Natalia sighed. “I wonder why she's like that?”

“Me too.” Saya admitted. “We should ask one day.”

“Not any time soon… Hinako gave up all her shifts. Considering how much she likes her job… that's a little strange. I tried calling her, but her phone is off… I feel like something bad happened to her… I hope everything is alright.”

“She gave up all her shifts?” Saya repeated. “Maybe she's sick.”

“I think it's more serious than that… Hinako enjoys being taken care of. If she was sick, she would've told me… or Hajime. And Hajime would've dropped everything to help her feel better… hm… now that I think about it… no. As hard as it is, I need to trust Hajime.”

“Huh? What are you saying?”

“Remember how Tamami posted that lie about them? When she made it seem like Hajime had a crush on Hinako? I asked Hajime about it and she laughed and said it was just a delusion. I'm starting to think that she might've lied about that.”

“Only Hajime knows.” Saya said, quickly. “So I would recommend asking her…”

“Maybe…” Natalia was about to turn her attention back to clothes shopping, but she was interrupted by her phone ringing. Natalia dug her phone out, sighing deeply as she saw it was Hajime. “Speak of the devil…”

“Are you going to answer that?”

Natalia shook her head and declined the call. “I'm getting a weird feeling from Hajime these days… ever since the party… she's been a little different?”

“How so?”

“I'm a little sensitive to the vibes of others… sure she looks happier, but it's not the good kind of happiness. She also did something … very insignificant, but it was strange. This was during the party. Remember when you and Hinako told us that Tamami was the headline for that day? We were all concerned, except Hajime.”

“I guess… how did she react? I don't remember.”

“'Oh no.’” Natalia imitated, speaking in the dry, flat tone Hajime used - the one that was dripped in sarcasm. “I really don't want to accuse anyone of anything, but that was such a weird response. It made me wonder… did Hajime go to the media?”

“Now that I think about it… she was there when Tamami and Misa started fighting in the cafe. I was there too… but what was weird was the day Ayame and Tamami came over. Before that, we got into it, because Hajime called me a 'stupid, self-righteous bitch’.”

“Really? Hajime?”

“Yes. She was in a really bad mood too. She said something very interesting - ‘I don't need you like you think I do.’ Then when Tamami came over, she hid in the kitchen. When she came out, she told Tamami she didn't do it. I wouldn't think much of it, but after Tamami and Ayame left, Hajime started implying I did it… I don't know…”

“She has the motive. But at the same time… despite everything Hajime has been through… she's a good person.” Natalia said. “She comes off as cold and mean… but she's really nice.”

“I'm starting to question that.” Saya admitted. “I mean, if she is changing for the worst, I can't really blame her, but at the same time…”

“Whatever happened with Hinako must've sent her off the deep end.”

“Probably…” Saya wasn't going to expose that. “Whatever happened… I'm going to try to keep my distance from Hajime. Something is up with her.”

“Good idea…”

Back at Hajime's house, she was staring at her phone, trying to come to terms with the fact that Natalia had ignored her.

_ She dared to ignore me? After all I did for her? If it weren't for me, she'd be illiterate. When I call, you answer! I bet she and Saya are probably with Hinako now. Did they seriously choose the daughter of a murderer over me? Of course they did. I'm going to make them regret it. _

Hajime opened up her Facebook app and began to write a status message. 

“Natalia and Saya… why did you guys tell the media about Tamami's mother? Saya, there are better ways to get clicks for your blog. And as for Natalia… I'm not surprised that a dirty foreigner such as yourself has no morals. It's always the nicest people who have the darkest secrets.”

Feeling very proud of herself, she posted her status, and then decided to call Hinako. Of course, the call went straight to voicemail. Hajime couldn't help but to laugh.

_ I hope she's dead. She has such a weak mentality, she's probably dead. Good. No one makes a fool out of me and gets out of it unscathed. _

xxxxx

However, Hajime was wrong. Hinako wasn't actually dead, although she was so weak and hungry that she felt like she would end up dying soon. Hinako was doing what she did when she was younger - skipping meals until she got so hungry that she  _ had _ to eat. Then she'd end up giving herself a stomachache. Today, Hinako had taken all her dresses and jewelry and put them in a garbage bag, placing it deep under her bed.

Why was she like this? Hinako was still struggling to come to terms with the memory that she thought she had forgotten, not to mention the fact that her father murdered a ton of people, because he wanted to be a king of sorts. 

Her father wanted to be a king so badly that he hurt a ton of people. Was Hinako, the wannabe princess, capable of doing the same thing? For her to be, the events had to be real. They really had to happen. Did they really happen? Everything felt fake to Hinako, like the whole thing was a dream. There needed to be a way for Hinako to check. Soon, she got her idea. She got dressed, forced herself to eat some toast, and then she started walking.

Finally, she arrived. Hinako was surprised that she remembered the way - she hadn't been here since she was a little girl, at least ten years ago. A lot could change in that amount of time, and a lot  _ did _ change. The grand building that Hinako remembered was gone… it was now replaced with a flower field. Handwritten notes and photographs decorated the chain link fence. Hinako walked up to one of the notes and read it, despite the colored paper being faded by the sun. It was dated from a couple of days ago, on June 30th.

_ Happy birthday, Riina! _

_ How are you doing up there? I hope you had a good day today… it's been 11 years… 11 years but I still can't forget you. You'd be 28 right now… you probably know this, but I finally got to fulfill my dream of opening up a cat cafe. My mom says I shouldn't feel guilty, and I know you wouldn't want me to either. But I can't help it. You were right… we shouldn't have snuck out to the department store that night. I should've listened… I'm really sorry.  _

_ Every time I hear a rock song on the radio, I think of you. Do they have rock stars in heaven? I hope you were able to realize your dream, even after leaving. Why did you have to leave me here? I used to be mad at that man, that devil. I remember you texting me to say you were still alive, telling us not to worry. You said you'd hold on until the very end, because that's what rock stars do. Despite everything, you did your best… If it weren't for him… you're still be alive. I still have dreams of me digging you out of the rubble. I wish that was our reality. _

_ Riina… your mom says I shouldn't curse at Mr. Kita, but I can't help it. If it weren't for him, you'd still be here. I would do anything to hear your voice again. Even if it's just to tease me… I miss you so much, and I hope that we will be reunited again one day. _

_ Always and forever, Miku _

_ It really happened… _ Hinako fell onto her knees, tears falling from her eyes. She didn't know Miku personally, but reading that letter ripped Hinako's heart out.  _ My dad… my dad… he's a murderer. I'm not a princess. I'm far from it. I can't live like this. Hajime, you win! I hope you're happy. I can't live… I'm going to go home and... _

“Are you okay…?”

Hinako's morbid thoughts were interrupted by a girl who was standing next to her. She looked young, like she was no older than a middle school student. Her brown hair was in pigtails, each tied off with a green ribbon. Hinako felt very pathetic, crying like this in front of a child.

“I'm fine.” Hinako stood up. “I'm sorry…”

“What are you apologizing for?” the girl asked. “You're allowed to cry here…”

_ I don't deserve that right. If it wasn't for my father… this place wouldn't exist. All of these people would be alive if not for him… _ Hinako thought. However, she wasn't going to tell that to this girl. 

“I'm sorry… it's just really emotional… how could someone do such a thing…”

“My mom said that there was supposed to be a department store here… but that man died before it could happen. Um… ever since I turned 13 back in February, my mom has been giving me more freedom. So I've been coming here… to spend time with my actual mom and baby brother.” the girl pointed to a flower wreath. In the middle of it was a picture of a woman holding a baby boy. “I come here every Sunday… this is my first time seeing you. What's your name? My name is Serika Hakozaki.”

“Serika?” Hinako repeated. She felt like she was going crazy, like the combination of her thoughts and reality were suffocating her.

“Yes… is that your name too?”

“No… call me Hinako… I should get going… I only came here to clear my head, but I feel even worse…”

“Did something happen?” Serika asked. “Are you having a problem?”

“Yes…” Hinako admitted. “I'm stuck between taking on a responsibility or just living like nothing happened… on one hand… I want to go back to normal. But I can't… my heart hurts…”

“You should do what feels right.” Serika told her. 

“But I'm scared. This responsibility is… huge. I'm not sure if I can handle it… I can't handle anything… people have always spoiled me… I'm helpless… a useless...” Hinako's voice trailed off. She couldn't bring herself to call herself a princess anymore. That delusion had been shattered, and it actually made Hinako feel sick to her stomach to think that she believed herself to be one.

As for Hinako's fear, she wasn't able to forget Hajime telling her how she was threatened around - and Hajime's supposed parents only had two victims! Hinako imagined the victims of her father, all 1,506 of them, taking her to a guillotine! It was extreme, but Hinako's anxiety was doing her no favors.

“Everything is scary at first. You should try not to handle it alone if it's huge.” Serika said. “Do you have friends you can count on?”

“They all hate me… and they'll hate me even more…” Hinako sighed miserably. “Why couldn't I go with them? I should've died.”

“Don't speak like that… I used to think the same way. Why did I survive when the rest of my family didn't?” Serika asked. “But then my adoptive mom told me… there's a reason for it. It hurts… but I was chosen to live on.”

Hinako didn't say anything. Maybe she was chosen to make things right. But was she really? How could Hinako make things right? She couldn't believe in herself… she had the helplessness of her mother and the evilness of her father. What exactly was there to believe in?

Serika frowned. “I'm not sure what's going on, but I wish you the best… I know we just met, but I believe in you, Hinako! Oh yeah! Take this!” Serika handed Hinako a business card. “For when you feel better!”

“Thank you…” Hinako told her, deciding to leave the garden. Maybe if Hinako was a bit more mature, she might've taken Serika's advice. Unfortunately, Hinako was still very immature, so she was going to just live quietly. After all, everyone thought she was dead.

Why ruin a good thing?

xxxxx

The next day, Hajime woke up to several text messages from Tamami, Ayame, Saya and Natalia. She expected nothing less.

“Thank you for telling the truth… I always knew I couldn't trust those two.” - Tamami had sent. Hajime responded with a smiling emoji.

“What the fuck is up with you? I'm starting to get the feeling that you actually did go to the media. Why would you pin that on them? Unlike you, both Natalia and Saya helped out. Using Tamami's situation for whatever beef you have with them is low.” Ayame sent. Hajime told Ayame to “shut the fuck up and get off your high horse, don't you have an abused rat you should be taking care of? You should be grateful that I told on them.” Ayame responded with, “Abused rat? I should be grateful? I felt bad for you, but now? Go fuck yourself.” Hajime sent Ayame a picture of her middle finger, and then blocked her number.

Next was Natalia, who was equally as pissed. “Dirty foreigner? Is that what you think of me? How dare you. I thought we were friends. You know I would never do something like that.” To which Hajime replied, “You would, because that's how it is in your poor country, right? You're desperate for money. It's just in your nature. How much money did you get from selling Tamami's story?” Natalia took a while to respond, but she responded with, “There's nothing pathetic about an empty wallet, but what is pathetic is an empty heart.” That actually shocked Hajime into not replying.

The last message was from Saya, who had just kept it simple. “Please call me. Something isn't right.”

Of course, Hajime wasn't in the mood to deal with Saya's bullshit. Today was the big day - Hajime wasn't going to deal with them if she didn't have to. Instead, she left her bedroom, deciding to dial Hinako's phone number. Surprisingly, Hinako answered.

“Good morning, Hajime.” Hinako greeted.

“Hinako, I feel like I haven't spoken to you in ages. How are you doing, adjusting to being the daughter of a murderer?”

“There's nothing I can do about it.” Hinako answered. Her voice was weak and raw, as if she had been crying. Hajime found this hilarious.

“That's right. There's nothing you can do. So are you going to take responsibility?”

“I'm going to live quietly from now on. Everyone thinks Hinako is dead… I'm not taking responsibility.”

“Smart. I would've done the same if Aki never found me. Anyway… I was thinking, and I feel really bad about how I tore up your photograph, smashed up your dolls, and ruined your delusi-, I mean your memories. I'm going to a tea party later, at the Starlight Hotel. Would you like to join me?”

“Of course! But I don't have anything to wear. What should I do?”

“Come over, and I'll let you borrow my clothes. I don't have a lot of dresses, but I'm sure you'll find something. Oh… and make sure you wear your tennis bracelet. I want to show my best friend off.”

“Best friend? What?”

“Don't worry, Hinako. I forgive you for everything. I hope you are able to do the same. It isn't right for me to kick a dog while it's down.”

“Um… of course! I'll be there as soon as I can! What time is this tea party?”

“Six. Take your time.”

Hajime hung up the phone, giggling. She couldn't believe how easy this was turning out to be - the next step was to get Hinako all dressed up. She could only imagine how well that would go, Hinako refusing to take responsibility while dressed up in expensive clothes. She'd look like the selfish princess she is and the crowd would riot. 

Hajime couldn't wait.

xxxxx

“Here we are…” 

The two arrived at the banquet room at the hotel, which was filled with people… Hinako didn't know what she says expecting, but it was a very large turn out, with all kinds of people. Hinako felt very happy in Hajime's very expensive clothes. Even though she was shorter than Hajime, the two had found something to make it work. She wore a diamond butterfly barrette in her hair, which sparkled under the lights.

“I got that for you yesterday.” Hajime told her, smiling. “I'm glad you appreciate it.”

“Of course I do… it's beautiful… and fitting for a…” Hinako's voice trailed off.

“It's okay, Hinako. You're still a princess in my eyes. Now let's sit…”

The two sat down at a table. Hajime began to apply clear lip gloss, while Hinako was in awe by everything. Finally, the crowd ceased activity when a girl who looked somewhat familiar to Hinako walked onto the stage. She was holding a microphone.

“Good evening everyone. Welcome to our July community meeting. As always, I'm Kaori Sakuramori.” 

“Hey… I thought you said this was a tea party.” Hinako whispered to Hajime. 

“Afterwards. Some people are speaking first.” Hajime told her. “Now be quiet.”

Hinako quieted down as Kaori continued. “Before we start with voicing our concerns for this month, I'd like to hand the microphone to Hajime Fujiwara, who will talk about someone very important to her. Hajime, if you are here, please come to the stage.”

Hajime stood up. “Come on Hinako. It's time for your introduction to high society.”

“High society?” Hinako was shocked. “Do… do I really have to go up on stage?”

“Yes… don't worry. I know you have stage fright, so I'll do most of the talking.” Hajime smiled reassuringly. “Now come on.”

“Okay.”

The two walked up onto the stage, Kaori's eyes huge as she noticed Hinako. Were her eyes playing tricks on her? What the hell was going on? Wasn't Hinako dead? She had to be. But then who was this? It wasn't Yoshino, who was alledgely missing, so who was it? Why did Hajime look so smug? Something told Kaori not to hand Hajime the microphone, but Hajime shot her the most intimidating look ever. Kaori sheepishly handed it off.

“Good evening, everyone.” Hajime smiled. “As Kaori said, my name is Hajime Fujiwara, and I'm here to talk about someone very important to me… the reason we are all here today.” she motioned towards Hinako.

_ This is it, my introduction to high society,  _ Hinako thought, feeling giddy. She tried to think about what she should say, but she was too excited! 

Hajime continued, “This here is Hinako Kita. Isn't she cute? Look at her clothes and her jewelry. The diamonds are real, too. Her clothes probably cost more than your weekly pay. She is living well… just as Yusuke and Arisa Kita would've wanted. Her parents are so proud of her. Say hello, Hinako.”

Hinako's excitement quickly turned to fear. The once friendly audience had turned frigid, and Hinako could feel the difference. Her stomach had twisted up into knots and she could barely breathe. Her mouth had dried up completely, and her heart felt like it was going to explode. Hinako had started to sweat, and she suddenly had to use the bathroom… what was Hajime doing?!

“Oh… she's too good say hello.” Hajime giggled. “As expected. Like father like daughter. But Hinako came here today, because she has something very important to say regarding financial compensation.”

Hajime handed Hinako the microphone, a friendly smile on her face. But her eyes… her dark eyes were hollow and sinister. Her eyes told Hinako everything she needed to know. 

She was set up.

“Well? What are you waiting for? Tell them what you told me.” Hajime said, smiling.

Hinako moved the microphone up to her face, and gripping it  _ very  _ tightly, opened her mouth. She could do this. She had to believe in herself!

“Hello everyone. As Hajime said, my name is Hinako Kita, the daughter of Yusuke and Arisa Kita. I am very sorry to hear about what my father did to you, but I only learned very recently…”

A black haired girl in the audience jumped out of her chair, her intense blue eyes flashing with anger as she took her heel off and threw it at Hinako. She missed, and it nearly hit Kaori instead.

“So what are you going to do about it?!” 

Hinako stared down the blue eyed girl with so much intensity that she found herself sitting back down. In just an equally intense, confident tone of voice, she answered,

“I am going to take full responsibility for everything that my father has done.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *insert SKY Castle OST Part 4 - We All Lie here*


	14. XIV

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> decided to post this today since part 3 (the final part) is going live next week with chapter 15

XIV

In her 21 years of life, Saya had rarely experienced the kind of events where she wished she could grab a remote and rewind. However, what had just happened over the course of the last 5 minutes had been so bizarre, that Saya wished she could. She had been at the community meeting, as she was invited by Kaori. Natalia, curious about the happenings of a community meeting, had decided to tag along as well.

They had no idea what to expect, but they were  _ not _ expecting for Kaori to hand the microphone off to Hajime. They were not expecting Hajime to be here. They definitely weren't expecting her to be here with Hinako, who neither girl had seen since Natalia's party. In an even more unexpected twist, Hajime had decided to reveal that Hinako was the daughter of the man who caused everyone's misfortune… and most surprisingly, by far, was how Hinako was handling it. Hajime's eyes had tripled in size as Hinako got assertive and told the heckler that she was taking responsibility. But things were about to get even more twisted...

“If you are interested in financial compensation, please leave your surname and the amount you are requesting with my  _ associate _ here. I will do my best to fulfill each and every amount, no matter how small or large. Thank you.” Hinako then threw the microphone back to Hajime, who had been too shocked to catch it. She then jumped off of the stage and left the banquet hall. 

Hajime immediately picked up the microphone, her face red from embarrassment. “Um… well… that's…”

Kaori then appeared from behind Hajime, and snatched the microphone away from her.

“I think that's enough from you. As for everyone else - I will end this meeting here. We will postpone this meeting to next week. Please remember that one of our major themes is forgiveness. I will not discourage you from seeking financial compensation, but please… act in an upstanding way.”

With the meeting officially over, Saya turned her attention back to Natalia, who looked just as dumbfounded.

“What just happened? Was that really Hinako?”

“It seems like it. We should try to find her. Let's go.”

The two girls left the banquet hall, checking the nearby areas. There were only a few places where Hinako could go - they checked the bathroom and the lobby. They found Hinako outside, sitting on a bench. Her face was buried in her hands.

“Hinako!”

Hinako looked up to see that Natalia and Saya were walking towards her, their faces reflecting concern. Hinako, however, thought the worst. She stood up, with the intention of running off, but she still felt physically weak due to her stage fright. She fell back onto the bench, as the two stood in front of her.

“What are you guys doing here?” 

“Saya is friends with Kaori.” Natalia explained. “But… what was that about? Is your father really…”

“Yes.” Hinako answered. “Yusuke Kita is my father… the man who I loved so much… wasn't really a good person. But neither am I… like father like daughter…”

“Please. Your father would've never done what you just did. With the way he covered everything up and blamed others… he'd probably be pissed.” Saya guessed.

“Good.”

Natalia sat down next to Hinako. “I really can't believe you did that. Like… I remember how you'd cry whenever you had to speak in front of the class. What changed?”

“I don't want to be like him. I want to be different… I can't be in denial, I can't live in a fantasy. I can't reject reality anymore. I'm not who I thought I was… but maybe it's for the better this way…” 

“But geez… financially compensating everyone? No matter what the amount is? How are you going to pull this off?” Saya asked.

“I'll figure it out… I have to. I'm not the smartest, but it'll come to me eventually…”

“You don't have to take this on just because Hajime put you on the spot like that.” Natalia frowned. “They're going to be asking you for a lot of money…”

“I'm not doing this to spite Hajime. I'm doing it for my mom…” Hinako's voice trailed off, but before Natalia or Saya could say anything, they were interrupted by the sound of a door slamming. They looked up to see that Kaori had dragged Hajime out of the hotel.

“You took advantage of my feelings to try to incite violence and ruin my meeting.”

“I wasn't trying to incite violence!”

“Really? Then what were you trying to do?”

“Offer closure. I was trying to help!”

“No. There's offering closure and then there's manipulating the feelings of others for your personal entertainment. Yoshino Yorita… I bet that isn't even your cousin. You are in no position to do what you just did… using this tragedy to further your agenda. How can you sleep at night?”

“Better than you, knowing that my parents are still alive.”

Kaori raised her hand, but then she stopped herself. “You have serious issues. I never want to see your face again! Get out of here!”

Hajime then walked down the steps, stopping once she noticed Hinako, Saya, and Natalia staring at her. Seeing Hinako caused Hajime to see red. Ignoring the other two, she charged over to Hinako, yanking her to her feet.

“Are you happy?” Hajime demanded. “Are you happy, knowing that you made a fool out of me? ‘I’m going to take full responsibility’, ‘I will fulfill every amount’... you fucking bitch! Can't you go one day without mocking me?!”

“Let go of me!” Hinako shoved Hajime off of her. “You set me up because you  _ wanted  _ those people to attack me!”

“Which is the only reason you'd fulfill those requests, right?” Hajime laughed. “You're so transparent… as expected from Evil Princess Hinako, who only puts herself before everyone else! Just wait until I tell those people that you were bluffing, you…”

“Stop it!” Natalia shouted. “You've done enough for today. Go home!”

“Oh look who it is. The dirty foreigner, who of course is siding with the daughter of criminals. I can't handle this onslaught of trash. I'm leaving.”

No one said anything to Hajime, who started walking away. However, before she could get too far, she turned back around.

“I'll send you the list of people who want compensation later… have fun working yourself to death, because it's a lot.”

Hajime then walked away, leaving the three alone in silence.

“I'll see you guys later.” Saya announced, running off.

Hinako stood up, “I should get going too… but um… Natalia?”

“What is it?”

“You don't think of me differently because of who my father is… right?”

“Of course I don't. No one picks who their parents are. Some people, like our xenophobic friend Hajime, get extremely lucky. While others, such as yourself, do not…”

“Ah… I see. But I have a question.”

“What is it?”

“What does xenophobic mean?”

xxxxx

As Natalia was giving Hinako a refresher on SAT level vocabulary, Saya was looking for Hajime. Where could she have gone? Luckily Saya didn't have to look very far - she found Hajime around the corner from the hotel. For the first time since she met her, Saya was afraid to approach Hajime, who looked demonic. But Saya wasn't going to let that stop her - she could tell that Hajime was going through something.

“I'm not even going to ask you if you really apologized to Hinako because I know you didn't.” Saya started.

Hajime glared at Saya, who now felt two feet tall. “Then why did you follow me here?”

“I want to know what's going on with you. Something isn't right…”

“Everything is fine.” Hajime told her. “I just found out some important information that I had to share about Hinako… I told her first, and then I decided to tell everyone else.”

“But why? Does this have anything to do with her threatening to tell everyone about the people you thought were your parents? Or does it have to do with Hinako ruining your birthday?”

“Why are you talking to me in that tone?”

“Because you're wrong… I told you, the best way to handle Hinako is to apologize sincerely and then go your separate ways.”

“But why? Why should I do that? I don't want Hinako to be happy… she doesn't  _ deserve _ to be happy. Everyone always ends up taking pity on her… babying her. While Hajime gets thrown to the wolves and no one ever says anything about how wrong it is. Why hasn't Hinako apologized for what she did? Are we just going to forget that because she took responsibility? Why do I deserve to have it hard? Why does Hinako always get off easy? Admit it… you, like everyone else, likes Hinako better!”

It took Saya a while to find her words. “First of all, nobody deserves to have it hard. Secondly... there's a reason why I haven't publicly denounced Hinako. I haven't forgotten… of course not. Everytime I see her, I'm reminded of our phone conversation, or you crying in my room. I just can't say anything about it because by doing so, I'd out you. I have talked to Hinako about it… but privately. While I like what she did at the meeting, I don't like her as a person. She has a lot of growing up to do before reaching that point…”

Hajime didn't say anything, so Saya continued. “I didn't come out here because I wanted to talk about Hinako. I wanted to seriously ask you if everything is okay. Your recent behavior is… startling.”

“Everything is fine.” Hajime answered. “Nothing is wrong… I'm tired of life fucking me around. I refuse to be a doormat anymore.”

“I get that… I really do. But is being mean to others the best way to do that?”

“Mean? When have I ever been mean?”

“Your Facebook post accusing me and Natalia of leaking Tamami's information to the public. Calling Natalia a dirty foreigner from a poor country. You doing exactly what Ayame stopped Hinako from doing to you. Trying to take advantage of the victim’s feelings to cause physical harm to Hinako. Calling me a self-righteous bitch. The constant sarcasm. If those things aren't considered mean to you…”

“I really think you should mind your business. I wouldn't have done that if Natalia didn't ignore my phone call. As for Hinako…” Hajime shrugged. “It was only a matter of time before  _ someone _ found out.”

Saya shook her head. “I really can't believe this.”

“Well don't. I'm going home. We're done. Don't ever talk to me again.”

And before Saya could say anything else, Hajime left the park.

xxxxx

The next morning, Hajime felt like shit. What had happened after the meeting? The last thing she remembered was a conversation with Hinako, Saya and Natalia, which ended when Hajime felt like they were ganging up on her. Then Saya found her in the park. But that was last night. Now, Hajime was laying in her bed, trying to get over her headache.

She held her hand up to the ceiling and stared at it. She had been so pissed by what happened at the meeting, that Hajime had raided her parents wine cabinet. She had succeeded in getting drunk for the first time. That made a lot of sense, because Hajime was  _ still _ pissed. 

She walked over to her desk and took out the piece of paper that listed the compensation information. Maybe it was because the incidents had been 11 years ago, but Hajime felt like Hinako was getting off easy - the families that were interested only requested a total of 5 million yen. As she stared at the number, Hajime's eyes began to water up as she suddenly remembered the comment that had sent her over the edge.

After ditching Saya, Hajime went into a convenience store. She had intended to buy some chocolate. As she was trying to decide which variety to get, she looked over and noticed two girls who were at the meeting. 

“So did your family sign for compensation?” one of the girls asked. She had short wavy brown hair and thin eyebrows. 

Her friend, a red haired girl, shook her head. “My dad and older sister were talking about it… they said they would've, but just hearing Hinako say she was taking responsibility was satisfying enough.”

Thin Eyebrows nodded. “That's how my family felt about it too. Like we were kids when it happened but apparently Mr. Kita gave everyone the run around back then. They said the constant deflection of blame and responsibility was horrific. They found his daughter owning up to it to be refreshing.”

“Yes… Hinako was very cool about it… but her friend… Hajime, was it? She was...” it was then that the red haired girl looked up and noticed Hajime, who was just staring.

“What is it?” Her friend then noticed Hajime as well and turned to her friend. “Come on Suzuho, the atmosphere is weird. Let's go.”

_ Five million yen.  _ Hajime felt ill as she read the paper. Five million yen could've been viewed as a lot, but she was reminded of her debt to Aki. Hajime had hoped for Hinako to get a number similar to that - 15 billion yen or more. Not a fraction of it!

Hajime grabbed one of her pens and began to add zeros to the numbers, inflating Hinako's 5 million yen to 50 billion. As soon as Hajime finished that, she folded the paper and placed it into an envelope. The next step was to get dressed and deliver the note to Hinako, but before Hajime could make it to her closet, she had to let Hinako know she was coming.

She dialed the number, and waited. 

“I don't want to talk to you.” Hinako told her.

“Well that's too bad. You wanted me to get the compensation information, right? Unless of course, you were lying just to feel like a princess. Were you?”

“I wasn't lying.” Hinako answered. “Um… what time is it? Ah… it's 1. Let's meet at three… Star Coffee Bar.”

“No Milk and Honey cafe?”

“Of course not. Their hot chocolate gave me a very bad feeling.”

xxxxx

Being in the neighborhood of Star Cafe Bar gave Hajime nostalgia for the days when she believed that she and Hinako were actually friends. She found herself missing the days where she cut glass, but that changed as she walked by the bus stop outside of Yuzu's studio. Both Yuzu and Hiromi were standing there, along with a girl who Hajime had assumed was her replacement. Seeing them, and their shocked expressions once they noticed Hajime, made Hajime feel superior, like she won.

“Is that Hajime?” Yuzu asked Hiromi.

“Looks like it… but she looks a bit different. I can't put my finger on it.” Hiromi answered.

“It's the designer clothes.”

“No… it's something else...”

_ Hater. Hiromi has always been a hater. She's such a jealous person… some things never change,  _ Hajime thought as she sat down in the cafe. She ordered a butter croissant and peppermint tea, people watching as she waited for Hinako.

Hinako arrived fifteen minutes after Hajime, her expression very unfriendly. Not that Hajime minded. Without exchanging greetings, or saying anything at all, she dropped the envelope onto Hinako's side of the table. Hinako opened it up, moving her eyes down the paper. Once she reached the “total” row, her eyes got bigger, then she folded the paper back up and placed it into her bag.

“Thank you.” Hinako told Hajime, who was in the mood to bait her.

“That's a lot of money.” Hajime said, faking concern. “How on Earth will you raise 50 billion yen?”

“I will figure it out.” Hinako told her. “I've been thinking about it all night…”

“If you need help, I can set you up with the person who almost got me started as a prostitute. You can fill the vacancy left by me.” Hajime offered, smiling. Hinako did not return the smile.

“Thanks… but no thanks… I'd rather not go such lengths… I'm glad you're comfortable with yourself to do work like that… but I'm not.” Hinako told her. 

“It's easy money.” Hajime attempted. “You'll make way more than you would selling perfume. Fifty billion yen is nothing to sneeze at.”

“Yes… it's a lot, and it will be hard. I know it will be hard. But I believe that everything will work out in the end, no matter what happens… but thank you for your advice. I will do my best, no matter what I decide to do.” Hinako began to stand up, as if she was going to leave, but Hajime wasn't having it. Before Hinako could go anywhere, Hajime stood up and threw her mug of tea into Hinako's face. Luckily for Hinako, the tea had cooled off, but the porcelain cup still did enough damage to hurt her face.

Hinako covered her face with her hands, but that wasn't enough for Hajime. She walked over to Hinako, and then pulled her super close to her.

“You think that it'll be easy just because you decided to 'accept responsibility’?”

“I never said it was going to be easy. What does it matter to you? We aren't friends. Let go of me.”

Hajime did not let go. “Can you handle it on your own? Your life has been so easy up to this point. You're going to fail, because you're nothing but a helpless airhead. A stupid, delusional princess.”

Hinako could feel herself tearing up once she heard Hajime's insults - because the truth hurt. However, she had to hide it. Her tears would only make everything worse. Instead, she just shook her head.

“I know how you feel, Hajime.” she said. “I know you want me to ask you for help. I know you're secretly wishing that I would ask you to pay the debt for me. Despite everything you say about me being spoiled, coddled, helpless, whatever… you've  _ always _ been the first person to make things easy for me. You want me to only rely on you. That's why you stole my letter, right? Is that because you're in love with me?”

Hajime didn't say anything. She couldn't say anything, because Hinako was one hundred percent correct. But while she couldn't speak, she sure as hell could get violent. She threw Hinako into their table.

“You'd never make it as a designer anyway!” Hajime shouted, then she stormed out of the cafe, feeling even worse than she did when she woke up this morning.

Back inside, Hinako had gotten up, feeling not only shaken up but very embarrassed by what had happened. Everyone in the cafe was staring… watching her.

Hinako ignored the whispers and walked outside. She wasn't sure of what to do - should she run after Hajime and attempt to take her on? Or should she just go home? 

The answer was crystal clear; Hajime was still within view. All Hinako had to do was  _ see  _ Hajime storming off in another direction to know that it was best for her to run the other way.

That's exactly what Hinako was going to do.

Unfortunately, she didn't get very far.

“Well, well, well… look at what we have here…” 

Three short haired girls had approached Hinako. The red haired girl wore a white sundress, the one with the shortest hair wore an outfit that resembled a school uniform, and the last girl wore a baseball jersey. Hinako got a bad feeling from all three.

“Hello… um… do I know you guys?” Hinako asked.

“No, but you will know us very soon.” Baseball girl held out her hand. “Pay up.”

“Excuse me?”

“I am going to take full responsibility for everything my father has done.” the red haired girl said mockingly. “Were you lying?”

“Oh no… of course not. Um… what were your names?”

“Subaru.”

“Mizuki.”

“Akane.”

“Um…” Hinako felt embarrassed as she realized she meant to ask for their surnames. But then she realized that there was no way she'd be able to pay the amounts they requested right now. 

“Cat got your tongue?” Mizuki challenged.

“I'm going to do my best to pay you guys as soon as possible…” Hinako told them. “Please be patient…”

“Please be patient.” Akane laughed. “We've been patient for the last ten years. It's time to take responsibility for real. Why are you acting like you don't have the money?”

“Because I don't.” Hinako admitted. 

“You don't, but you showed up to our meeting wearing Fendi and actual diamonds? And now you're cosplaying as poor? Do you think we're stupid? Pay up!” Subaru yelled.

“Fendi?” Hinako repeated. “What's Fendi?”

“I'll show you!” Subaru raised her fist, but Mizuki quickly grabbed her friend, stopping her.

“I have a better idea…”

“You do?”

“Yes…” 

Not saying anything, Mizuki walked over to Hinako, and then smiled at her. Hinako, thinking that everything was okay now, smiled back… only for Mizuki to grab onto Hinako's earrings, and yank the studs out of her ears. She believed that the earrings were real diamonds, not cubic zirconia. If Hinako wasn't going to do this the easy way, Mizuki figured it was best to take matters into her own hands.

Hinako let out a blood curdling scream as she felt her ears splitting. Birds flew from the nearby trees, and she fell onto the ground, crying in pain. 

“Free for all!” Akane shouted as Mizuki dove for Hinako's necklace.

If Mizuki got away with stealing Hinako's jewelry, Akane ripped the sandals off Hinako's feet and stole her barrette. Subaru emptied out Hinako's purse, stealing all her cash and the purse itself. Then the three ran off, laughing and screaming as if they just pulled off the heist of the century.

Hinako kept sitting on the sidewalk, ignoring the pain of her bleeding ears to pick up her cards and the other things Subaru threw out of her wallet. After she got everything back, Hinako looked around. Akane, Mizuki and Subaru were nowhere to be found, but Hajime was watching in the distance, laughing.

Maybe, this would be harder than Hinako thought.

xxxxx

“Natalia… can I confess something to you…?”

A few days later, Natalia and Nanami were going up the elevator to Mizuki Department Store. As it was an early Thursday morning, the two girls were scheduled to be openers. Normally, the two honored their agreement to not make small talk “before regular business hours”, but today, Nanami seemed to be thinking differently.

“Sure. What's going on?” Natalia asked.

The door to the elevator opened and the two girls stepped out. Now they had to walk all the way to their counter, where they had to set up for the day.

“I'm thinking about transferring departments.” Nanami admitted. “... I really don't want to, but I don't feel comfortable working with such a person…”

“Um… what are you talking about?”

“Hinako is coming in later, isn't she?” Nanami asked, then she sighed. “I don't want to look at her anymore… I want to throw acid in her face. Her voice makes me want to claw my ears off…”

“Whoa there… that's a little extreme.”

“No. What's extreme is how she comes here and acts like nothing is wrong… I'm sure you know about Hinako's family…”

“We shouldn't hold that against her.” Natalia attempted.

“You're right. But I can't help it. Everytime I look at her now… I think about my aunt and my cousin and the lives they were robbed of…” Nanami stared hard at the ground, clenching her fists. “There's no way they'd get rid of her… since she brings the fragrance department so much money… I might as well quit.”

“No! Don't quit… I'm sure we can think of a solution…”

“Unless it ends with Hinako getting fired… I don't care.” Nanami sighed miserably. “I can't believe I liked that girl…”

Natalia couldn't say anything - she couldn't. Back in Brazil, Natalia had a neighbor named Elena, who was studying abroad in Japan for a summer. However… Elena never made it back, as she perished in the department store collapse. While Natalia wasn't close with Elena - she was ten years older than Natalia - she had seen how Elena's death tore apart her family.

Considering that, Nanami's reaction was perfectly valid.

The two kept walking towards the counter, stopping once they noticed that the other openers had formed a crowd around the Dior counter. 

“What's going on he…” Natalia's voice trailed off once she noticed the current state of the counter. The glass had been shattered, and all the perfume bottles had been thrown onto the floor. The most shocking part was the graffiti. “Die” and “Murderer” had been sprayed across the parts of the glass that hadn't been smashed.

“Oh my God…” Nanami gasped. “This is…”

As her voice trailed off, Natalia listened closely to the whispers of her co-workers. However, everyone silenced once Seira broke through the crowd.

“Why are you all just standing…” Her voice trailed off as she noticed the vandalism, then she shook her head. Snapping back into leader mode, she sent the rest of the openers back to work, and then called Natalia and Nanami over.

“What are we supposed to do?” Nanami asked.

“Well… you can't sell anything if the inventory has been destroyed… and there's no way we'll get this straightened out before the doors open… both of you can go home for the day. Don't worry, you'll still get paid.” Seira sighed. “I'm going to be calling the police shortly… why are people so stupid? We have cameras everywhere.”

Natalia frowned. “I hope you find out who did it.”

“Oh we will. Most definitely. But I just want to know why… like what the hell are they talking about? Murderer?”

“You haven't heard the news about Hinako?” Nanami asked.

“What about her? I know she'd been out for a while but she's back… right?”

“Right. But not that… her dad…” Nanami shook her head. “Remember the department store collapse and the apartment fire from years ago? Her father was responsible for that. Apparently, it just came out… and I guess people are angry. Shit, I'm angry.”

“I completely understand. Don't worry, Nanami. I'll take care of this.”

Nanami began to walk away, but Natalia decided to hang around for a bit.

“You aren't going to fire Hinako, are you?” Natalia asked.

“Of course.” Seira answered. “She's a liability. This department will take a huge loss without her, but… I don't want our store's reputation to go to shit because of our affiliation with her. Most importantly… I don't want any of you guys to get hurt if one of the more … mentally unhinged victims decides to show up.”

“I understand.”

“But of course… I understand your concern. I understand that Hinako is a bit sensitive so I will let her go gently. This is for the safety of everyone.”

“Of course. That's always the most important thing.” Natalia agreed.

“I'm glad you see it my way. Now you can head home. I have a few phone calls to make…”

xxxxx

A few hours later, Hinako was putting on her tennis bracelet and smiling down at it. 

“Today will be a good day.” She told Elizabeth 2.0. “I will do well and sell lots! I wanted to get you a friend, but this debt is way more important. But don't worry…” Hinako started giggling. “You have me!”

As Hinako was talking to her doll, her phone had started ringing. She left Elizabeth 2.0 alone and answered.

“Good afternoon, Seira!” 

“Ah… you're in a good mood today.” Seira told her. 

“You could say that. Did something happen? Why are you calling me?”

“Because I can't stand to look you in the face… it was already bad enough how you treated Hajime, but now? I wish I really did drown you.”

“Eh?” Hinako's stomach twisted into knots. She sat down on her bed, as she felt like her legs were going to give out.

“Don’t bother coming in today, tomorrow or the next day. I deactivated your badge and threw all your things away. Natalia told me to hire you because said you'd help us out. And you did. However… unlike your father, I'm not willing to work with absolute trash just to make a few extra dollars.”

“What?” Hinako squeaked out. 

“I know you aren't the smartest so I'll put this into terms you can understand. You're fired. Not that it should matter to you, since you're above retail work anyway. Right?”

Seira then hung up, and Hinako quickly redialed her number. Each time, the call went straight to voicemail. Hinako felt ill as she had the realization that she had gotten blocked. She felt like crying, but she couldn't. 

What was she going to do? Hinako turned to Elizabeth 2.0, who was still staring into space, as all dolls did.

“Today is a bad day…”

xxxxx

Naturally, Hinako had to find another job. However, things got complicated when you took into account that she didn't have a computer. She had gotten her old job via Natalia, so now, Hinako was actually going to have to look. Her first step was to ask Ayame. She called her the day after getting fired.

“Why are you calling me?” Ayame asked. Her tone was flat and she sounded apathetic. Tamami, who was in the background, though, sounded very interested, with how she kept asking Ayame who she was talking to. She eventually told her it was Hinako.

“I need help…” Hinako's voice trailed off. How was she going to approach this? Did Ayame even know that Hinako wasn't just a normal girl anymore?

“Okay… what is it?”

“Um… I lost my job…”

“Ah… maybe you should ask Hajime for advice… after all, she was in the same position… thanks to you.” Ayame said. “But I wonder why you'd get fired… it's from my understanding that you're good at what you do. Like… really good.”

“Yes, but…”

“Nobody wants to work with the daughter of Yusuke Kita.” Tamami said in the background. “Would you?”

Ayame ignored her. “Why did you call me? I don't have the patience for whatever you're dealing with.”

“I'm sorry for bothering you.” Hinako quickly hung up, deciding that her best bet was to help herself.

Hinako's job search took her to the library, where she was able to find jobs and apply for them. Most of the jobs Hinako applied for were salesgirl positions - but every email conversation and phone interview went the same way:

“So you were the top seller at Mizuki Department Store?”

“Yes.”

“That's very impressive. Your last name is Kita, isn't it?”

“Yes… Hinako Kita.”

If it was an email, the conversation would stop there. If it was a phone interview, the person on the other end would hang up. Three weeks of this left Hinako feeling very hopeless and depressed, to the point where Natalia's reminders that she should eat would escalate to Natalia coming over and making sure she ate.

“I'm going to let everyone down… the victims… my mom… I'm a failure...” Hinako told Natalia one night. “They're going to start asking me for money… and I'm running out of the money I have saved… I want to give up.”

“Well don't. You're doing the best that you can.” Natalia said reassuringly. “Let's watch Sleeping Beauty, to take your mind off of things.”

But Hinako couldn't focus on the movie. All she could think about was how she felt like she wanted to just sleep and never wake up.

Back in the present, Hinako set her phone down as she just gotten hung up on again. She was at the library, but had ran outside once a number had called her. Now she was back at the computer, but she wasn't looking at jobs - instead, she was on Facebook.

It took a few attempts, but Hinako was able to remember her password. Since Hinako hadn't been on Facebook for years, she had a ton of notifications, but the one that stood out to her was a friend request from Hajime, that had been sent a while ago. She accepted it, and then stared at Hajime's page. The most recent update was from an hour ago - Hinako couldn't read the status, as it was in Chinese. Most of Hajime's recent updates were in Chinese, but the pictures told her everything she needed to know - Hajime was in Singapore, seemingly on vacation with her mother and father. 

_ “How does it feel, knowing that the girl you hate oh so much, is living the life you dreamed about? How does it feel, seeing that the girl with the 'dirty blood’ is living like a princess? It's tearing you up inside, isn't it?” _

Hinako flinched as she heard Hajime's voice in her head. She was absolutely right, but what could Hinako do? She opened up a new message, and then typed,

“Please help me…”

Hinako stared at it for a moment, debating on whether or not she should send it. However, Hajime came online seconds later, and then she saw the dreaded message pop up on the screen.

_ Hajime Fujiwara is typing… _

Feeling afraid, Hinako quickly closed the browser window and ran out of the library. There was no way she would ask Hajime to fix everything. No way! Hinako needed to handle this on her own. She decided to go home.

The way home was uneventful. Usually, Hinako would run into one of the victims on the street, and they'd try to scare her. Most of the time they succeeded.

However, things were different when she got to her apartment door. Hinako had been digging her keys out, but her veins turned to ice as she noticed something hanging from the door frame. It was a Barbie doll, with a piece of yarn tied around her neck. The doll had short brown hair and brown eyes - she was obviously meant to be Hinako. 

Hinako reached for her, stopping once she noticed something  _ very  _ important.

“You're naked. Oh no…”

Hinako removed the doll from the string and took it inside of her house. She wrapped her up in a paper towel and then used a ribbon to keep the makeshift dress on.

“I'm going to call you… Eugenie!” Hinako smiled at the doll and started smoothing her hair. “I have another doll named Elizabeth too, but she's fancier. But don't worry…” Hinako lowered her voice to a whisper. “She's very friendly. Even though you aren't fancy, you're pretty too. You just need a nice outfit… oh my gosh! Wait here!”

Hinako ran into her bedroom and got the garbage bag of dresses from under her bed. She dug around and took out a green one, and then grabbed a pair of scissors. Hinako began to cut fabric from the skirt, however, she stopped when she realized something. 

She set the scissors down and ran over to her wallet, going through all the cards. Once she found what she was looking for, she left the apartment, heading out back into the summer heat.

xxxxx

_ Hakozaki Fabrics. _

Hinako didn't think twice before entering the small fabric shop. However, her enthusiasm waned as she saw Serika sweeping the floor. How could she bring herself to be happy around Serika, who had lost her mother and baby brother due to her dad? Feeling shameful, Hinako covered her face and tried to leave, only for Serika to skip over.

“Hinako! You came! I'm so happy!”

“You are…?” Hinako asked. “What? Why?”

“Because most people ignore my business cards! How do you like our store? Isn't it cute?”

“Yes…” Hinako nodded. “The fabrics are so pretty…”

“Please buy what you can! My mom is in the bathroom, so she'll help you check out as soon as she gets out…” Serika lowered her voice to a whisper. “Mommy says I'm not allowed to use the register yet.”

“Is it just you two here?” Hinako asked. 

“Yes…” Serika smiled. “Sometimes my friend Noriko helps out too. But she's also 13 so we can't do much. Noriko says child labor is bad. But how are we children when we're thirteen?”

“Good question.” 

“All we can do is sweep the floors. Sometimes we move things and answer questions and say hi to people. Mommy does all the hard work.”

“I see. But what about when it gets busy?”

“It never gets busy.” Serika told her, frowning. “It's scary… we might have to close. That's why I give my cards to everyone. Noriko does too. Thank you for coming. Please look around.”

Hinako nodded, going towards the blue fabrics. She stared at them for a bit, and then walked back over to the register, where Serika's mother, Momo had joined her.

“And she actually came! Isn't that so cool?” Serika was saying.

“Yes… yes…” Momo's voice trailed off as she noticed Hinako standing there. She had gone to the community meeting, as always, with the intention of getting advice on raising Serika. Momo recognized Hinako, however, she didn't sign up for financial compensation because she wasn't directly affected by either incident. Unlike most people in attendance though, she didn't really have an opinion on Hinako.

“Hi… are you Serika's mother?”

“Yes. I'm her - Momo Hakozaki. And you're Hinako Kita, correct?”

Hinako nodded nervously. These days, anyone asking for her full name  _ always  _ ended badly. “Yes… um… I came by here today… because… this might be a little bold, but I need a job.”

“Of course you do. Everyone needs to work to live.” Momo told her. “So tell me. Why should I hire you over anyone else?”

“I used to work at Mizuki Department Store in the perfume department… the counter I was placed in didn't do very well in terms of sales, but within six months of me working there, we became the top selling counter. I was in the fashion club in high school so I know how to cut fabric and sew. I don't know if you do alterations here but I can do those if people need them…” Hinako's voice trailed off and there was an awkward silence as she tried to read Momo's face expression. It was very hard to tell if Momo was impressed by her self introduction. Even Serika looked confused.

Finally, Momo spoke. “Very well. Be here on Monday at 10 am. I look forward to working with you, Hinako.”


	15. XV

Part III

“Forgiveness does not change the past, but it does enlarge the future.” - Paul Boese

XV

“Thank you for coming, everyone. I'm very excited to show you guys what I have been working on for the last two months…”

Two months had passed ever since Hinako had started working at Hakozaki Fabrics, and just like the weather, things with her had changed. While Hinako liked the job  _ now _ , it hadn't always been like that. For starters, Hinako ended up taking a steep pay cut. There was no extra commission involved to bump up her check. She went from working forty hours to just twenty, and the base pay was way lower. Secondly, there was nothing glamorous about cutting fabric. Despite everything she had told Momo, Hinako found that her fabric cutting skills had deteriorated a bit. This lead to her making mistakes and pissing off customers. While Hinako dealt with difficult customers at Mizuki Department Store, it seemed like a lot of Hakozaki Fabrics customers were out to get her.

Of course they were. It was illegal to terrorize Yusuke Kita's daughter, but it wasn't illegal to try to get her fired. In the first two weeks, Hinako had seriously expected to be let go, but Momo was really patient. She felt like once Hinako got over the learning curve, she'd be a good employee.

She was absolutely right, even though Hinako had her doubts at times. Things began to look up though - Hinako's talent as a natural salesgirl began to show, and the store began making more money than before. Momo rewarded Hinako by giving her more hours, which Hinako appreciated. She could only afford giving her ten more hours a week, but Hinako didn't mind.

She needed all the free time she could get. And for what? All of her friends were about to find out. Hinako stood outside her bedroom door, which was closed. Tamami, Natalia, Ayame, and Saya were all watching, waiting, for Hinako to open the door. Everyone seemed to be just as excited as Hinako was… except for Ayame, who was on her phone, looking bored.

That actually pissed Hinako off a little bit, but not too much. While everyone else in the group was able to acknowledge that Hinako had changed over the last two months, Ayame didn't seem to care. Hinako found herself getting desperate for Ayame's approval…

“Open the door!” Tamami cheered, clapping her hands excitedly. 

“Okay!” Hinako lead the girls into her bedroom, and the girls collectively gasped. About twenty dresses were laid across the bedroom, mostly on the bed. The dresses all ranged in color and formality - from casual to semi formal.

“Wow… did you make all of these?” Saya asked. 

“Yes. This is what I have been doing on my days off.” Hinako said proudly. “I am glad you like them… I just need other people to like them too…”

“Why did you make these?” Natalia asked. 

“I got an idea one day… to use my natural talent to help pay the debt I owe.” Hinako said, smiling. By now, she had gotten over the initial shame of being Yusuke Kita's daughter. When it came to her friends, she decided to be open and honest about things relating to that matter. While Tamami and Ayame didn't really care much, both Saya and Natalia found it refreshing that Hinako seemed to grow up a bit.

“So I guess you're going to try to sell these.” Saya figured. “These dresses all look super cute. Everything looks well made too. I'm sure people would like them.”

“They definitely will…” Ayame spoke up. She held up a yellow dress and smiled at it.

“You would know, right?” Hinako asked, giggling nervously. “Um… if it's okay with you… could you try to sell these on your show?”

Ayame threw the yellow dress back on the bed and narrowed her eyes. “I knew there was a reason why you wanted me here… but to answer your question, no.”

“No?! Why not?!” Hinako's newfound maturity was thrown out of the window, as she sounded like she was about to have a temper tantrum.

“Why not? Because I don't want to.”

“But we're friends.” Hinako attempted, grabbing onto Ayame's wrist. Ayame quickly pulled it back.

“Do you think of yourself as my friend? Well you're not. I only tolerate you because of everyone else… if it weren't for them, I wouldn't be here. So what if you reformed? You're still the same Hinako Kita as always… trash. And I'm not saying that because of who your father is.  _ You  _ are trash, no matter how different you try to act now.”

The group silenced for a bit, until Natalia spoke up. 

“I don't think it's fair to hold Hinako's immaturity against her… we're young adults. We're going to grow and change.”

“You're right.” Ayame agreed. “But this goes way past 'immaturity’. There's a reason why Hajime isn't here. And it's because…”

“Ayame, stop it.” Saya interrupted, cutting her off. Her voice was firm; she wasn't going to allow Ayame to out Hajime, even if that wasn't Ayame's intention. Luckily, Ayame caught herself.

“Okay. I won't go into the details, but you cosplaying as a good person while not acknowledging the mistakes you made not even 3 months ago… who the fuck are you kidding? Hajime is no angel herself but she at least deserves an apology.”

“That's true.” Natalia agreed. “Hinako… you still haven't apologized yet, have you?”

“I don't want to!” Hinako pouted, stomping her foot in the ground.

“And the cosplay comes off~” Ayame sang.

“Ayame, please… I know I made a mistake, but I'm not cosplaying… I'm really trying to change…” Hinako attempted.

“Only because of you getting exposed and you want to protect yourself. You're so transparent.”

“No! It's not like that! I remembered what my mom told me years ago… something I forced myself to forget…” Hinako's eyes began to water up. “I just want her to be proud of me… because I know she isn't right now… no one is… so please… I beg you…”

“No. Absolutely not.”

“But…!”

“Come on, Hinako… it's Ayame's show. She has the right to say no.” Natalia reminded her.

“You're right…” Hinako sighed in defeat and stared hard at the ground.

“Maybe you should sell the dresses online?” Saya suggested. “Like make a website and I'll promote it on my blog.”

“I'm for that as well.” Natalia agreed.

“Me three! Hinako has horrible stage fright! She wouldn't be able to sell water to a thirsty man if she got on TV…” Tamami said, giggling. “That makes Ayame even more amazing, doesn't it? She has  _ no  _ stage fright at all!”

“Yeah… you're right…” Hinako blushed, feeling a little embarrassed. “Maybe it's for the better if I take Saya's suggestion. So I guess we need to take pictures…”

“Someone should be wearing the dresses, so people can see how they look.” Natalia suggested. “So… you're going to need a model.”

“Ah…” Hinako shook her head. “How much is that going to cost?”

“Not much. Maybe one of us can do it? It's your decision…”

“Hm…” Hinako appeared to be thinking. “It's a good idea, but I'm not sure who to pick.”

“Pick who you think is the prettiest.” Ayame suggested.

“Good idea. Okay, everyone. Let's vote. Raise your hand if you think Tamami is the prettiest.”

Silence. All of the girls stared at each other awkwardly as no one moved to raise their hands. Hinako was about to move on to Natalia, but she was interrupted by Tamami sighing miserably.

“I knew it… I'm short and plain…” she said. “Even though I've been staying out of the sun, I'm still not pretty… as expected… mom was right.”

“You aren't ugly! You're pretty cute, actually.” Ayame said, trying to be reassuring. “Your mom is wrong!”

“Well then… if she's wrong, why didn't anyone raise their hands?” Tamami frowned. “Why didn't you raise your hand? Please don't lie to me, Ayame.”

“Well…” Ayame's voice trailed off. 

“Honestly speaking… I didn't vote for you because you're short. Aren't models supposed to be tall? You're like 130 cm...” Natalia spoke up, although she immediately regretted it once she saw how Tamami was glaring at her.

“I'm 145 cm, thank you very much.” she said through her teeth.

“Hey… I think there's a better way we can decide.” Saya spoke up. She walked over to Hinako's desk, and found five pens and five index cards. She handed one to everyone and continued. “Everyone write down who they think would make the best model for Hinako's dresses. When you're done, fold your card and give it to me. Don't write your names on the card either. Let's keep things anonymous.”

Everyone agreed and quietly wrote down the name of the person who they believed was the best fit. When Hinako, the last person, handed Saya her card, Saya opened them up and looked at the results.

“Well…” she began. She flipped the cards over, showing the answers to everyone else. 

_ Hajime. Fujiwara Hajime. Fujiwara. Fujiwara-san. Hajime-chan. _

Hinako laughed nervously. “No way…”

“Well… she is very pretty.” Saya said. “Like you see her on the street and you don't think much of her, then you find yourself turning around to look at her again.”

“That's right… that's pretty accurate.” Natalia agreed, then she laughed derisively. “I can't believe we all voted for her.”

“Well she is the tallest out of all of us.” Tamami said, frowning. “If I had her body… my life would be so different. Why couldn't I look like her?”

“Come on. She may be pretty but she has the ugliest personality of us all.” Ayame attempted.

“But you voted for her, right? We all voted for her. What does that say?” Tamami sighed. 

“What should we do?” Hinako whined. “Is it worth even trying to go through with this?”

“I'd say so. Hajime could make you a lot of money.” Natalia said slowly. “But…”

“Has anyone talked to Hajime recently?” Hinako asked. “The last time I saw her was… I don't even remember.”

The group fell silent as they all haven't actually spoken to Hajime in months. 

“So how should I ask Hajime?” Hinako kept going. “I should go over her house, right?”

“Um… I don't think that's a good idea.” Natalia told her.

“That's  _ definitely _ not a good idea.” Saya agreed. 

“I'll do it!” Tamami volunteered, jumping up. “Leave it to me!”

“No. Sit back down.” Ayame spoke up. “I'll go.”

“You will?!” everyone else asked in unison.

“Of course.” Ayame grabbed her purse. She wasn't going to say this out loud, but she really didn't want Tamami to be alone with Hajime. Ayame seriously believed that Hajime was the one who told the media about Tamami's mother… and the last thing Ayame wanted was for Tamami to tell Hajime something and for it to end up in the media again. She needed to protect her friend.

With Ayame and Hajime's historically bad relationship, Ayame believed that she didn't have any good feelings to cloud her judgement. It was obvious that certain people in the group, such as Saya and Natalia, missed Hajime. Then there was Hinako, who never apologized, and Tamami, who Hajime knew was in a vulnerable position.

Ayame was the best person for the job.

xxxxx

On the other side of town, Hajime was washing her hands. She had attempted to make another bowl, but gave up halfway through. What was the point? Who would she even give the bowl to? Sure there was Sumi and Takashi, but...

Truth to be told, Hajime wanted out. Any hope for a relationship with them had been ruined after the Singapore trip. It was clear that her presence had been driving a wedge between her parents - Sumi seemingly accepted Hajime, while Takashi was a bit different. Hajime tried her best to make a good impression, but...

“I feel nothing towards you.” he told her on the fifth day. “I have no interest in changing that either… if I were in Japan when my wife found you, I wouldn't have allowed you to step foot on my property, you gold digger.”

“Okay.” Hajime said back.

“Go have fun and try not to bother me and my wife.” He handed Hajime an envelope of money, which she blew on street food. Hajime spent her time with random people in the hotel, who taught her some Chinese. Despite being surrounded by people, Hajime felt super alone. Later that day, she saw that Hinako had  _ finally _ logged on her Facebook, and in a moment of desperation, Hajime had started typing up a message. However, she stopped herself when Hinako abruptly went offline.

Being around Sumi and Takashi was so awkward it was oppressive. Takashi did not look at her or even refer to her by name. She was just the “gold-digger” to him. Sumi was more concerned with enjoying her vacation, only talking to Hajime to show her off to whoever she could. Hajime felt less like a human and more like a doll!

She couldn't handle this, so Hajime left Singapore early. Neither one of her parents had anything to say about that. Once she was back in Japan, Hajime’s sleep schedule started to get a little weird - she seemed to be sleeping less and less. Her 8 hours of sleep slowly began to shrink down to 6… 6 hours soon became 4… then 2. Sometimes, she wouldn't sleep at all! 

Besides that, she would sometimes hate-read Saya's blog or hate-watch Ayame's show, to find reasons to justify her being alone. She wished she could find a way to “check up on” Hinako, who hadn't actually logged back into her Facebook after that day.

Sumi came back three weeks later, and Hajime  _ was  _ happy to see her, until Sumi actually saw her. She seemed a bit awkward, but Hajime assumed that it was because of the jet lag. But it was actually something else.

“Your face is looking kind of bloated.” Sumi told her.

“It must be because I just woke up.” Hajime explained. “Sometimes when I wake up, my face is swollen. It happens randomly but the swelling usually goes down after a few hours.”

“I've noticed. But that's not what I'm talking about.” Sumi shook her head. “You could stand to lose some weight… what would my friends think if they saw you? They might think you're pregnant. You aren't pregnant aren't you?”

“No ... it's only 5 kg.” Hajime said slowly. Her face was burning from embarrassment. After exposing Tamami, Hajime  _ may  _ have started stress eating to cope with her feelings of loneliness and stress from her guilty conscience. Of course, Hajime did not feel good about this, and she had hoped that no one else would notice, but...

“ _ Only _ 5 kg? There's no way... you look terrible! I thought you looked bad in Singapore but now you're really letting yourself go!” To further drive to point home, Sumi stabbed her finger into Hajime's cheek. Normally Hajime would've broken her fingers, but she didn't have the energy or will to stand up for herself.

“Sorry. I'll fix it.” Hajime said in a flat tone of voice.

“It shouldn't have become a problem in the first place! Why are you like this? Now that I think about it, you were acting funny in Singapore too, sleeping a lot and ruining the atmosphere with your bad mood and whatnot. You seemed to be avoiding me and your father - you made a  _ really _ bad impression on him! You screwed up our vacation!”

“I said I was sorry.”

“Sorry isn't good enough. Do you know how many arguments we've gotten into over your shitty attitude? Even my friends picked up on it! I can't keep defending you. If it comes down between you and my husband, I'm choosing him.”

“Okay.”

Sumi shook her head. “Why are you acting so withdrawn? Something must be going on... are you depressed? Be honest.”

“Maybe…” Hajime admitted. She wanted to tell Sumi about everything with Hinako and Saya, but before she could, Sumi just laughed.

“What on Earth do you have to be depressed about?”

Hajime answered Sumi by walked away, going back to her room. Cursing herself for thinking she could trust Sumi, Hajime fell back asleep, not waking up until it was dark out.

A week had passed, and Sumi had left Hajime alone. Now she was trying her hardest to pull herself out of her depression, but it was difficult. Especially since she had no support system. Sure there was Saya, but Hajime's inferiority complex had convinced her that Saya hated her.  _ Everyone _ in her former group of friends was out to get her - some were very obvious about it, like Hinako, Tamami and Ayame, but others were covert about it, like Natalia and Saya. 

They all wanted to see her fail!

As Hajime was wiping her hands dry, the doorbell rang. She walked over to the intercom, expecting the mailman, but surprisingly… it was Ayame. Ayame? What could she possibly want? Hajime remembered blocking her number two months ago - why was she here?

Hajime hesitated before turning on the voice box. “I'll be right there.” she told her.

A few minutes later, Hajime stepped outside.

“What do you want?” 

Ayame sighed. “This may seem like it's coming out of nowhere, but … we need your help.”

“With what? And who's we?” Hajime crossed her arms.

Ayame did her best to try to not appear intimidated. “As you know, Hinako has decided to take responsibility for her father's crimes…”

“Okay? What does that have to do with me?”

“She got the idea to make clothes and sell them. You know, as a way to earn the money back. So she's going to make a website to sell the clothes on… but she needs a model. All of us voted… and well.. you won unanimously.”

“No way.” Hajime said, shaking her head. It was hard for Ayame to tell if she was saying no out of shock, or no as in no, she wasn't going to do it. As for Hajime, she was having a hard time believing that this wasn't a set up. Why vote for her? She thought she looked below average. But on the other hand… Hajime felt a little touched over the fact that her former friends were still thinking about her. Maybe she could apologize and Hajime could be welcomed back into the group?

“So what do you have to say?” Ayame asked. It was hard guessing what Hajime was feeling.

“I think…” Hajime's voice trailed off. Why exactly why was Ayame the one approaching her on this? Why not Saya, Natalia or even Hinako? Would Hajime even make a good model? She was awkward in front of cameras and not much of a smiler -  _ none  _ of Hajime's school pictures had been taken with her smiling. Then she remembered her confrontation with Sumi last week. 

“Models are supposed to be skinny~” Hajime could hear Sumi say, and she could picture everyone laughing at her pictures. Hajime shut her eyes tightly, because she did not want to cry in front of Ayame of all people. To a logical person, it made no sense, but to Hajime, she felt like Ayame had approached her on purpose, to mock her for putting on weight.

“Hajime?” Ayame asked, staring at Hajime's clenched fists. “Would you please answer the question?”

“No.” Hajime wiped her eyes. “I'm not going to do it… fuck Hinako… and fuck you for trying to set me up!”

“Excuse me? If you didn't want to do it, all you had to do is say so! Don't swear at me!”

“What? I can swear at you if I want to. It's not like you deserve anything better!”

“Why? Because I told Tamami that you had lice, what…  _ twelve _ years ago?”

“Now that I think about it… how is that flea infested rat anyway? Is she still following you around like the parasite she is? Or did you finally call animal control to put her down?”

“What did you just call her?” 

“You heard me.”

Ayame shook her head, then she laughed derisively. “You're disgusting.”

“Not as disgusting as my friends from FRIDAY. Aren’t you somewhat of a celebrity? I should call them up and ruin your career. Hmm… what kind of dark secrets do you have, Ayame? Now I regret being so mean, because I know nothing about you. I know you're from a good family… like a legitimate good family. So I guess that's off the table… your mom and dad love you too much to hit you… what a shame because I'd love to knock your lights out.” 

Ayame's laughter ceased as she realized what Hajime just owned up to. “I knew it. I fucking knew it!” 

“And what are you going to do about it? Get out of my sight before I…” 

Despite Hajime's threat, Ayame found herself getting in Hajime's face. The two were now 2 cm apart.

“She really believes that you didn't do it… how could you do such a thing?! She could've died because of you and you think that's funny?”

“Well, she didn't die, and besides. Tamami said it herself. Her skin may bruise but it doesn't hurt when Misa hits her. What's the big deal?”

“The big deal is that Tamami is small as fuck so I really thought she wasn't going to wake up that day in the hospital. The fact that you find enjoyment in that makes you a psychopath.”

“You're so cute, thinking I care. Tamami sure as hell didn't care when she posted that shit on Facebook. We committed the same sin but you didn't crucify her.”

“Yes I fucking did. But yes. The both of you are the same. The difference is… she seemed to seriously reflect on it and ever since then, Tamami hasn't posted a messy Facebook status. She's slowly trying her best to be a better person. As for you?” Ayame laughed. “I can see why Hinako doesn't like you back.”

Ayame didn't know what she was expecting, but she was not expecting for Hajime to spit in her eye. The grossness of it all, plus the frustration of having to deal with Hajime's one sided hatred towards her for more than a decade had caused Ayame's aggression to peak. Without thinking, she swung on Hajime, going for her jaw. Just as Ayame threatened, she was going to gut Hajime or die trying.

xxxxx

“Where the hell is Ayame? What's taking her so long?”

Almost three hours had passed since Ayame left Hinako's apartment, and the group of friends had naturally gotten worried. There was no reason in the world for Ayame to be taking so long - Hajime lived 30 minutes away by bus. 

“Maybe she stopped somewhere.” Saya guessed.

“No way. Doesn't Ayame's show come on in like two hours? Because there's a special going on?” Natalia turned to Tamami. “You would know.”

“Yeah… you're right.” Tamami agreed.

“Hajime killed her.” Hinako guessed. “Oh no…”

The apartment silenced as the group heard the sound of a key turning in the front door. It took a while, but Ayame eventually limped in, smiling despite being in obvious pain.

“Hey guys.” 

Everyone gasped as they noticed that Ayame had taken quite the beating. Her face had been scratched, and her nose and mouth were bloody. The right side of her mouth had started to swell up, and there was a nasty scrape on her knee. Ayame's hair, which she normally wore up, had been pulled out of it's bun and now she, for the first time ever, was just wearing it down. She had been drenched in water but the most startling thing was what Ayame was twirling something gold and sparkly around her finger. 

“What happened with Hajime?” Saya demanded.

“Nothing… except… our friendly conversation became very unfriendly when she spit in my eye.” Ayame laughed nervously. “That bitch has serious issues. But I'd like to see her try it again. I am  _ always _ up for a round two.”

“Did you win?!” Tamami blurted out excitedly.

“I'd say that.” Ayame held up Hajime's bracelet. “I don't condone violence, but it got me this… she spit in my eye and I don't know… I heard my grandfather telling me he ain't raise no bitch.”

“And he didn't! God, Ayame you're so cool!!” 

“Geez. If you “won” and you look like that, I'd hate to see Hajime.” Natalia mused. “What did you do to her?”

“I went into sicko mode.” Ayame said quietly. “So… I don't know what happened but I knocked her the fuck out after we fell into the fountain and she tried drowning me.”

“Yikes. That sounds really scary. I hope Hajime is okay.” Hinako admitted. “Poor Hajime… hearing this... I'm really worried about her.”

There was an awkward silence for a few minutes, as everyone was stunned that this was coming from Hinako out of all people. Natalia spoke first.

“I hope you didn't knock her out too badly. I want my turn in the ring with her.”

“You’ll get your chance eventually. She'll be fine. Her mom came home as I was running out with her bracelet.” Ayame shrugged. “Hajime kept screaming, ‘I can't feel my hand!’. Whatever. She can write with both. Then she kept crying. Ask me if I give a fuck. You don't spit on people!”

“Um… guys. As much as I want to discuss this… you know what this means, right? Hinako doesn't have a model.” Saya reminded them.

“You're right… what should we do?” Hinako buried her face in her hands.

“Tamami.” Ayame spoke up.

“What? I don't think my mom would do it.” Tamami answered.

“Fuck your mom. I'm suggesting you.”

“Interesting choice…” Saya mused.

“Huh? Why?”

“Yeah… why? Hinako didn't make kids apparel.” Natalia reminded her. 

“Natalia.” Tamami said through her teeth. “But why me? Are you trying to get Hinako to fail?”

“No.” Ayame shook her head. “I'm actually setting her up for success. Tamami, be honest, do you like shopping for clothes?”

“No…”

“Why not?”

“Because everything has to be altered… I might have to look in the children's departments, but… I'm turning 20 in three weeks. I don't want to look crazy.” Tamami sighed. “I'm tired of sales attendants coming up to me and asking me why aren't I in school or where my parents are. Or when I pull out my credit card and try to pay they get so shocked, like… 'why does this 12 year old have a black card?’ I'm not 12…”

“Exactly. You aren't 12. You may be small and have a youthful face, but you're an adult. There are probably other people of your stature who feel the same way. So if we take advantage of that…”

“That's a good idea. What do you think, Hinako?”

“I think it's a good idea!” Hinako smiled at Tamami. “It's going to take a while to alter everything, but we could get started right now if you want.”

“Good idea.” 

“Well you guys have fun.” Ayame smiled at her friends. “I have to go get ready.”

“For what?” Saya asked.

“My show, what else.” Ayame finger combed her long black hair. 

“But you just got into a fight. Don't you think it's better if you rest?”

“I can rest after the show ends.” Ayame reminded her. “The show must go on, and I'm a professional. I will be fine. If you all are still here, you should tune in. I'll be making a special announcement.”

xxxxx

Two hours later, the group decided to move their party to Saya's house - as Hinako did not have a TV. While Saya and Natalia were watching the TV, Hinako and Tamami were in the adjacent room, Hinako working on tailoring her dresses to fit Tamami. They had had gotten three dresses done, and had 17 to go.

“You work fast.” Tamami had observed. She was expecting for this to be hell - Hinako had always been easily distracted, but she was surprisingly focused.

Hinako, whose mouth was full of pins, smiled at Tamami. “When I'm done with you, you'll be the princess you were always meant to be.” she had said, not really opening her mouth. But Tamami heard what she was saying and appreciated it.

In the main room, Saya was staring hard at Ayame as she laughed at the story a customer was telling through the phone about the pot that Ayame was selling. Natalia was laying on the couch, playing a game on her phone. 

“That’s really convenient… it saved you so much time, I bet.” Ayame said, smiling. When the customer agreed with her, Ayame reached over and grabbed the vendor's wrist. The two started excitedly talking about the convenience of owning one of these time-saving pots, especially for single parents.

“How is she able to just get on TV and sell like nothing happened earlier?” Saya asked in disbelief, once a commercial break started.. “I would've taken off.”

“That's just Ayame's mentality.” Natalia explained. “She always does what she needs to do. Like … when we were in 9th grade, she caught a 39 degree fever during our exams week.  _ Everyone _ told her to stay home, but she still snuck to school and sat for them… even though she was throwing up in the bathroom during the breaks. I thought of Ayame as a spoiled princess for the longest time but that changed my opinion of her.” 

“Wow… but look at her! Ayame wasn't kidding about being a professional!” Saya pointed at the TV. “You never would've guessed that what happened earlier happened… I wonder what her announcement is going to be.”

“It should be coming up soon. This show goes off at 9… I wonder if the announcement relates to Hajime?”

“Huh… why would it?” Saya asked.

“Wishful thinking. She could use outrage culture to start a Hajime Fujiwara lynch mob.” Natalia sighed dreamily. “No one puts down Brazil and gets away with it!”

“Considering how she stopped Hinako from doing the same thing… it's not likely.”

“Let me be delusional.”

The two fell into silence as the commercial break ended.

“We sold out.” Ayame announced. “Ah… it's always a pleasure to work with you, Kanako.”

“As expected from the amazing Ayame.” 

Ayame blushed, but then she straightened out. “Oh right. Before we end for the night, I want to make a special announcement relating to my regular show. Please make sure to tune in two weeks. I will be bringing some very special guests on. I'm sure you know who they are - Hinako Kita and Tamami Wakiyama. If you find yourself getting frustrated over clothes shopping because you're short and petite, you will not be disappointed. Please tune in! Good night, everyone.” Ayame then waved at the camera, smiling and showing off Hajime's tennis bracelet.

The next show came on, and Saya immediately rewinded the TV and paused it, right before Ayame made her announcement.

“I thought she said she didn't want Hinako on her show?” Natalia asked.

“I guess she changed her mind… Hinako! Tamami! Come here. Ayame made her announcement!”

Once the two were in front of the TV, Saya replayed the announcement for them. Tamami fell to her knees and Hinako ran into the bathroom, covering her mouth with her hands. They could hear Hinako retching into the toilet and crying from anxiety.

“Why?!” Tamami yelled. “I can't show my face on TV! What if my mom calls in and abuses me in front of the entire country?! What the fuck, Ayame?”

Both Natalia and Saya stared at Tamami, until Tamami's phone started ringing. It was from Ayame. Saya answered it and put it on speaker.

“I hope everyone saw my announcement~” Ayame sang.

“Oh we saw it alright!” Tamami snapped. “Do you think?! What if my mom calls in?”

“She won't. If she does, I'll put her in her place by embarrassing her in front of the entire country” Ayame said. “So what does Hinako think?”

“About that. She started throwing up as soon as she realized she'd be doing a live broadcast.” Saya said. 

“Why did you say my full name?!” Hinako shouted from the bathroom. 

“I think you're trying to get us hate comments on purpose. After the 13th, everyone will know that Tamami Wakiyama is not only Misa Wakita's punching bag, but also Ayame Hamaguchi's ugly friend!” Tamami shouted, stomping out of the room. 

“Ayame, I don't think this was a good idea.” Natalia admitted. “They're not like you. They have stage fright… when it came to presentations, Hinako always took zeros in school because she hated talking in front of class that much. Tamami is so uncomfortable with how she looks but you're going to put her on national television? What's your endgame?”

Ayame sighed. “Do you not trust me? Everything will work out.”

“And if it doesn't?”

“It will. I swear on my life. If it doesn't… I will shave my head bald on live broadcast.”

“Okay. So why did you change your mind?” Saya asked.

“Why do you think?” Ayame laughed. “Hajime will lose it when she sees me and Hinako talking on television. She'll be mad as  _ fuck _ .”

A huge smile spread across Natalia's face. “You’re brilliant! That's my girl!”

“I'm glad I could make you proud. My head still hurts from earlier so I need to get home. But don't worry… I'm not going to let Tamami or Hinako screw this up. After all, my reputation is on the line as well as theirs. Good night you two!”

Ayame ended the call and Natalia fell onto the floor, laughing. “This will be delicious!! I can't wait!!”

As for Saya, all she could do was stare at the TV, which was paused on Ayame waving and smiling at the camera, showing off Hajime's tennis bracelet.  _ Of course she was baiting her,  _ Saya thought.  _ It should've been obvious… everyone here hates her but I can't bring myself to. What's wrong with me? _

xxxxx

“You got mail.” 

About two weeks had passed since Hajime and Ayame fought, and for the first time since getting home from the hospital, Sumi had spoken to Hajime. Hajime was watching TV when Sumi threw an envelope at her. It was addressed with “Hajime-chan” and covered with cute stickers. 

“Thanks.” Hajime opened the envelope, which was a get well soon card from Saya. Hajime tore the card to pieces and threw the paper to the ground. Sumi's eyes were huge at Hajime's blatant disregard of cleanliness. 

“Pick those up.”

“No.” Hajime grabbed one of the couch pillows and covered her face with it. Sumi rolled her eyes and grabbed the remote, changing the channel. 

“Good afternoon everyone, it's Wednesday, September 13th, and I'm glad you guys have decided to tune in. As always I'm Ayame Hamaguchi, and…”

Hajime tore the pillow off of her face and limped away, taking the long way to the kitchen - she was going to make peppermint tea and then take it upstairs, as dangerous as that was. Ayame had not only broken Hajime's right hand, but she had done serious damage to Hajime's right ankle. Nothing had been broken, but the doctors at the hospital told her to stay off her foot if she had to. Hajime didn't care. Sumi and Takashi didn't care much either. Despite Hajime's injuries, both Takashi and Sumi left her to fend for herself. All sympathy had been lost since they reviewed the security footage and saw Hajime had started the fight by spitting into Ayame's face. They were rightfully very disgusted by her behavior. So was Hajime, but when wasn't Hajime disgusted by herself?

Hajime stopped once she got to the foyer. As Takashi was back in Japan now, the family pictures had been replaced as Sumi said they would be. It wasn't a studio picture though, but a picture of the three on the beach on Singapore. Sumi was in the middle, holding her husband's hand and kissing him on the cheek, while Hajime, stood on the other side of Sumi, smiling awkwardly. 

Hajime hated the picture because she looked bad, and she believed that Sumi purposely chose that picture to terrorize her. It seemed to be working. She stopped eating in front of Sumi and Takashi and only really drank tea these days. How long could she keep this up? Hajime found herself missing Kyoko. Kyoko had the answers she needed, and Hajime trusted her the most. Kyoko was the only person with her best interests at heart...

Hajime made her tea and was about to slowly go upstairs, but she stopped once she heard a very familiar voice.

“Everyone can be a princess, no matter their size.” 

Hajime took her tea and headed back to the room with Sumi. Hinako was talking to Ayame as Tamami was smiling in a black and white polka dot dress.

“That's such a good mindset to have.” Ayame nodded. “Is there anything you would like to say before we open up the phone lines?”

“Yes… um... I may lack a lot, no… I do lack a lot, but I worked very hard on these dresses. I did everything on my own, from the designs to the sewing… I also got the fabric from Hakozaki Fabrics, please check it out. I could only start with 50, but it's my dream to expand and make more dresses for people of all body types. I will not be getting any money from the proceeds … 100% of the money will be donated to the families who suffered from the Castle Department Store collapse and Sky Apartments fire.”

“Yes. So not only will you look good, but you will be contributing to a good cause.” Ayame smiled. “Please get on this while you can. The lines are now open.”

“Wow…” Sumi said, noticing Hajime. “Aren't those dresses well made? I'm thinking of calling to get one for my assistant. The polka dot dress is really cute, and the girl wearing it is adorable. What do you think?”

Hajime just stared at Sumi in silence, trying to convince herself that Sumi wanting one of Hinako's dresses was coincidental. 

_ She's not doing it to mock me. She doesn't even know who Hinako is. It's just coincidence. She's… _

Hajime's thoughts were interrupted by a bell ringing on the TV. 

“And that's that! Everything has been sold out!” Ayame announced, and then Hinako, happy as ever, threw herself at Tamami and started squealing. Hajime couldn't bear to see this. She threw her tea cup at the television, shattering it. Sumi jumped up from the chair, obviously pissed.

“Do you have any idea how much that cost?!” 

“Shut up you evil wench!!” Hajime exploded. “Fuck your tea cup! You wanted give money to her? Do you know what she did to me? Do you?!” Hajime yelled. “Of course you do! Because you hate me, just like everyone else does! What will it take for people to like me? Do I need to die? Maybe I should stop eating. You'd like that right? Maybe then I'd be the perfect daughter you always wanted. Maybe I'll drop dead. Maybe I'll kill them all. Maybe I'll…”

Sumi looked very scared by Hajime's sudden change in mood. “Kill them all? Who are you talking about? What's gotten into you?”

“Life.” Hajime laughed a little bit, then she got serious. “My shitty life. Not that you care. I have nothing to be depressed about, remember?”

“Wait.” Truth to be told, Sumi was starting to feel concern over Hajime's sanity - she seemed like a completely different girl from who she met at the hospital. But how was she going to approach that subject? Sumi's lack of parenting experience was starting to show, and it wasn't like she could ask Takashi about it either.

As for Hajime, she didn't wait. She walked upstairs, thinking, trying to get her emotions back under control. _ Things are getting way too easy for Hinako. This isn't fair. It isn't right. I need to stop it. There has to be something I can do… coming out on TV, saying ‘I did everything on my own’... are you mocking me? If I had to suffer due to my debt, so do you! _

Hajime was about to go into her room, but she stopped once she noticed that Takashi had walked out of the master bedroom and was now staring at her. Hajime limped past him, not saying anything. Once she got back into her room, she fell onto her bed and grabbed her phone, reading Everyday Saya.

There had been two new updates since Hajime had last checked - Saya and Kaori had went out walking to a nearby park. The next one was about a book that Saya had started reading. Nothing was interesting, until she refreshed the page… and a new entry had just been posted. Apparently, Hinako appearing on Ayame’s show was a big deal, as Hajime’s entire ex-friend group had decided to take a group selfie from Ayame’s dressing room. The actual post was about Saya congratulating Hinako for meeting her dream. The very last sentence was what threw Hajime over the edge - apparently, Hinako was able to get weekly guest privileges, and would be on Ayame’s show every Wednesday. 

“Please tune in.”, Saya wrote, along with a ribbon emoji.

“Bitches!” Hajime shouted. She was about to break her silence and write the meanest, nastiest hate comment she could think of, when she realized that there was no point - Saya would probably delete the comment. Hajime wanted it to be read, so she switched to Facebook. She had also decided to change her plan up and attack Tamami, who was known to be insecure about her physical appearance. She went back to Saya’s blog, saved the group selfie, and then attached it to her unwritten status. Then she started writing.

_ “Look at my friends! Aren’t they so cute? It’s no wonder Ayame is so famous, she’s so cute. I’d go as far as to say that she’s pretty. Pretty violent. Then there’s Saya, who is also cute, despite having the haircut of a 12 year old boy. At least she has a sense of style. Next to her is Natalia, who is *soooo* proud of being Brazilian, and Hinako, who could be a Disney princess, despite being the daughter of a human cockroach. Speaking of cockroaches, look at Tamami Wakita. I’m so glad her injuries healed, even though she’s still super hard to look at. I guess I’m jealous, because she turns 20 next week, but she looks like she’s turning 10. What should I gift her? Skin lightening cream? Or breast implants?” _

To get ultimate audience participation, she added a poll at the end of her status, and then tagged all the mentioned parties in the post. Hajime pressed post, but as soon as she did, she got a message. 

Surprisingly, it wasn’t related to her post, but rather, the message was from a stranger. Hajime’s interest was piqued once she noticed that it was the same girl who had thrown her shoe at Hinako at the meeting. Her name appeared to be Fumika.

“I finally found you…”

“???” Hajime felt weirded out, and she wasn’t exactly going to hide it. That didn’t stop Fumika though.

“You seem to know Hinako personally… can you help me talk to her?”

“We, we meaning me and Hinako, are not friends. So I can’t.”

That didn’t stop Fumika. “Well… she was on TV. She’s shameless, trying to become a celebrity. No one else around me seems to agree.”

“Well I agree with you.”

“If it’s okay with you, can I rant towards you when I feel bad? I need someone to listen… I can tell you don’t like her… I can tell you’re going to validate me.”

“Do as you please.”

Hajime, not willing to talk to a stanger right now, ignored Fumika’s reply and instead watched as people yelled at her to delete her most recent status. Not that Hajime was actually going to delete it of course. For some reason, she felt really good about it.

And she was about to feel even better, because she just got an idea. A very good idea.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> uh oh spaghetti ohs


	16. XVI

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think it's funny how different this turned out compared to what I initially thought of. But whatever. It be like that sometimes.

XVI

“Thank you for being a loyal customer of Rainbow Bank. We hope to see you soon.”

It took a few days for the money from the dress sales to hit Hinako's bank account, but when it did, Hinako nearly screamed. She had earned about 650,000 yen! That wasn't a lot, but Hinako was still happy - she wasn't expecting to sell out, let alone even sell half. Now she was keeping her word, and transferring the money to the first family on the list, the Tanaka family. A small part of Hinako wanted to run and take the money and use it to buy dolls and dresses, but she had to keep her word. 

She wasn't the same Hinako she was two months ago.

“Thank you.” Hinako left the bank, hoping that the Tanaka family would appreciate the surprise after 2 business days.

Now what should she do? Hinako had off today, so she could've gone home and worked on making more dresses. However, she decided to take a break for today, so she wouldn't end up burning out later. She thought about going back to the shop and taking Serika out for ice cream - the two had naturally gotten very close over the last two months. 

Hinako usually spent a lot of time with Serika, because Serika liked her. At first, Hinako was nervous about bonding with her, given that Hinako's father made Serika an orphan. But Serika seemed to be ignorant to that fact. She had always wanted a sister, and Hinako's appearance seemed to be an answer to her prayers. Meanwhile, Hinako, who was usually the “baby” of whatever group she was in, had secretly been wishing for a younger sister for years. It didn't help that Hinako felt kinship towards Serika, due to her sharing a name with one of her deceased “siblings”. 

Of course, Momo supported the friendship. She had unofficially adopted Hinako as her daughter, not only because she was grateful for Hinako saving the shop, but because of how she took care of Serika. Of course, there were matters where Hinako was absolutely useless, such as helping Serika with her homework, but for anything else, Hinako did her best.

Back at Hakozaki Fabrics, Hinako had walked into an empty shop. It was a slow day today.

“What are you doing here?” Momo asked. She had been sweeping the floor near the register. “You aren't scheduled to work today.”

“Hi Momo. Where's Serika? I want to take her out for ice cream, because summer is ending soon.”

“Ah… Serika won't be able to get ice cream today. She's currently in detention, because she and Noriko wouldn't stop talking in class.”

“Aww… I see.” Hinako frowned. “Well, I don't miss those days…”

“I'll have to talk to her later… But besides that, I'm actually glad you came - I was about to call you.”

“Why?”

“One of your friends is here. She asked about you. I didn't get her name, but she's a black haired girl… she's really pretty too.”

“Ayame?” Hinako guessed. 

“I wouldn't know. She said she'd be in the back, looking at the beads.”

“I see. Thank you Momo!”

Hinako skipped to the back of the store, expecting to see Ayame. In her mind, Ayame was  _ finally _ going to congratulate her for turning around, but she stopped in her tracks once she noticed Hajime observing a string of beads, the imitation pearls wrapped around her finger. She was also wearing sunglasses indoors, for whatever reason.

“So you're a designer now?” Hajime asked, not even looking at Hinako.

“I wouldn't go that far.” Hinako shook her head. “How did you know?”

“Don't worry about it… I wanted to come here because I wanted to let you know that the world of fashion is cutthroat, and I don't think you can handle it…”

“Thanks for your concern, but I know more than you think… we would talk about this stuff in fashion club, and I want to be a part of it.”

“You must be having a delusion.”

Hinako frowned. “This isn't a delusion. My dreams and goals aren't delusions.”

“Okay.” Hajime sighed deeply. “I guess we can either do this the easy way or the hard way. I'll start with the easy way.”

“Eh? What do you mean?”

Hajime handed Hinako the fattest envelope that she'd ever seen. “Take this money and don’t ever show your face on TV again… I know how much you hate public speaking, so you should be thankful for me.”

Hinako handed the envelope back to Hajime. “I can't accept this. You're right. I do hate public speaking, but Ayame taught me a trick to help me not freak out in front of everyone.”

“And what's that?”

Hinako giggled a little. “She told me to pretend I was a princess, addressing my loving subjects. It helped more than I thought it would… she also told me and Tamami to face our fears - it'd be better to do that instead of running. She's right. So I'm sorry…”

“Okay.” Hajime put the envelope back in her bag. “Don't say I didn't warn you.”

“What?”

Hajime didn't say anything else, instead, she limped out of the store, leaving Hinako to realize that she missed her chance to ask Hajime about her fight with Ayame. She attempted to follow Hajime, but Momo stopped her.

“Is everything alright?” she asked.

“Yes. Why wouldn't it be?”

“I just got a bad feeling from that girl. I saw her hand you the envelope, and I've seen enough soap operas to know that exchanging envelopes with hushed voices is never a good thing. Even moreso, considering who you are…”

“I know, I know… don't worry. I won't drag you and Serika into something dangerous. You can count on me.”

Momo shook her head. “I'm not talking about us… I'm talking about you. If something terrible happened to you, I won’t be able to sleep at night, and Serika would be devastated. People are crazy out here… please be careful.”

“I will.” Hinako nodded. “Thank you.”

Just then, Noriko and Serika skipped into the shop, holding hands. Noriko was swinging a box of Krispy Kreme donuts around like she won a prize.

“Did you two go to detention?” Momo demanded.

“Yes, but after we got out, we brought snacks!” Serika answered. “Well, Noriko did. I just tagged along.”

“I love Krispy Kreme!” Noriko gushed.

“So do I.” Momo agreed. “You two can go in the back and make sure you ask Hinako if she wants one. As for you…” Momo turned to Serika. “We will talk later.”

“Yes ma'am!” Serika said, and the two ran back into the breakroom. As for Hinako, she had forgotten about Hajime, and decided to go talk with Noriko and Serika. 

It wasn't until later that night, while she was telling Elizabeth and Eugenie the day's events, that Hinako remembered that she had intended to follow Hajime.

xxxxx

“Happy birthday, Tamami! You're now an adult!”

The morning of September 20th started out normally - Ayame, Tamami and Hinako were in Ayame's dressing room, getting ready for the weekly broadcast. To make things a bit more exciting, their second broadcast just so happened to overlap with Tamami's birthday. It should have been a happy occasion, considering how Tamami had come of age, but...

Even though several months had passed, Tamami was still going through some very heavy feelings due to her mother. She felt lost and was still trying to figure out just who Tamami Wakiyama was - she wasn't in the mood to celebrate anything this year. Everyone else seemed to respect that though, usually keeping their birthday talk to a standard 'happy birthday’.

“Thank you Hinako.” Tamami said, then she shut her eyes. “It's been twenty years since I ruined my mother's life… isn't it crazy?”

“And it's been 13 years since you improved mine.” Ayame told her.

“Mine too!” Hinako agreed, not caring if her math was off.

“I'm glad you guys think that way…” Tamami frowned. “I’m so nervous though … considering how successful our first broadcast was. It feels like a mistake.”

“Well it wasn't. I showed you the positive comments you got.” Ayame reminded her. “People think you're cute.”

“Yeah, but I don't. I look so…” Tamami flinched as she caught sight of herself in the mirror. 

“I'm happy you're my model.” Hinako attempted, running over and hugging Tamami, who had started sniffle over this, obviously moved.

“I'm just so… it's been a week but I'm still upset over this… after our first broadcast, I logged onto Facebook and saw…” Tamami pulled up a screenshot of Hajime's controversial status and it's poll. Hinako and Ayame read it, with Hinako hugging Tamami even tighter. Ayame just laughed bitterly, shaking her head. This was the first time she had seen it, since she had Hajime muted on Facebook. No one had talked about it either - Natalia blocked Hajime after the ‘dirty foreigner’ comment, Hinako still didn't care enough to use her account, and if Saya had seen it, she was being very quiet about it.

“Pretty violent? I'll show her pretty violent.” Ayame snapped. “And where does she get off, calling you Tamami Wakita? And the fact she included a poll? The nerve of that bitch…”

“I think you are fine the way you are.” Hinako told Tamami. “Your skin color is pretty…”

“But it isn't. I look like dirt and everyone agrees… I want to rip my face off...” Tamami's voice trailed off.

The dressing room fell into silence - Hinako was staring at Ayame, looking at her like she wanted Ayame to do something. After all, Ayame  _ was  _ the closest to Tamami. But even Ayame knew that no amount of validation would change Tamami's mind. There was nothing they could do right now, besides let those feelings pass.

The three stood in silence until there was a knock on the door. 

“Come in!” Ayame shouted. Much to her surprise, it was Karin, who got right to business.

“Your father wanted to come tell you this, but he didn't want to make your friends uncomfortable. So he told me to come tell you.” she said.

“What's going on?”

“Long story short… you can't go on the air anymore.” Karin pointed at Hinako.

“What? Why?!” Hinako asked.

“Come on.” Ayame dragged Hinako out of the dressing room and the two walked down the hallway. Surely enough, they found Ayame's father, Shinobu Hamaguchi, standing near the elevators.

“What's going on here?” Ayame demanded.

“Where did you come from?” Shinobu did his best to hide how startled he was - despite raising her for 19 years, he and his wife still got shocked by how Ayame seemingly could appear out of thin air. But that was irrelevant now.

“The dressing room. Karin came by and told us that Hinako is not allowed on air? Why not?” Ayame asked. “And why wait two hours before the broadcast to tell us? What are we supposed to do?”

“The mail came in this morning.” Shinobu sighed. “An envelope filled with 20 million yen, plus a letter. The letter was saying that if we allowed Hinako to go on the air any further, the person who wrote it would ruin your life.”

“Mine?” Ayame asked. “What the hell?”

“The author of the letter mentioned a video. As ridiculous as it sounds, I must protect my daughter…”

“I can protect myself!” Ayame shouted.

Shinobu just shook his head. “It's for the better if we comply. Need I remind you that you have anti fans just for being my daughter.”

“All they do is hide behind locked accounts and talk shit.” Ayame huffed. “I'm not scared of them. Especially since I've built my own following since then. I have a lot of fans. You know this.”

“Yes. And you're right. However, you still get hate mail, and a lot of it.” Shinobu reminded her. “As for this video… I don't know what you did, but I don't want them to be empowered by this. Hinako will not be allowed to appear on TV for the foreseeable future.”

Hinako shook her head. “It must be one of the victims from the collapse… they don't seem to like me coming out on TV… okay. I'll stay off of TV from now on.”

“Hinako!” Ayame was in disbelief. “Don't let them control you…”

“I don't have a choice.” Hinako frowned. “Some of them know where I live… it's best to just lay low for a while. Eugenie was hanging from my front door… what if it is me next? Plus… this is your dream. I don't want you to lose it all over me. I'm sorry for troubling you both.”

Hinako then ran back into the dressing room. Ayame was about to follow her, but she had an important question that needed to be answered.

“Did the person who wrote that letter happen to sign it?”

“Yes. Hajime Fujiwara. Now that I think about it, her name sounds familiar. Did she go to school with you?”

“Um… excuse me.”

Ayame made her way back to the dressing room, thinking. It was obvious that the video that Hajime was referring to was footage of them fighting. If only Ayame's general audience weren't made up of parents and older women. They weren't edgy enough to cheer Ayame on, and would probably boycott her, as they liked her angelic “perfect daughter next door” image. If the video was leaked, Ayame's other “image” would be validated - the reason why she had so many anti fans in the first place. A lot of people from Ayame's school days took it really badly when she got her own show.  They'd claim she was a huge snob, a spoiled brat, and a vicious bully - they called her Japan's Regina George. None of that was true though. If anything, Ayame had been the victim of several jealous classmates - after all, Hajime was one of them, but she kept her jealousy to passive aggressive comments.

A loud minority did not. That was why her grandfather taught her how to fight in the first place! But there was so much she could do. One of the highlights of her “fans” was that one sent her a birthday cake… with razors in it. Maybe her father was worried for a good reason…

Damn!

Hajime really got her where it hurt. 

In the dressing room, Karin and Tamami were awkwardly watching Hinako weep in a corner.

“You two. Step out.” Ayame ordered, and they did. But before Tamami could leave, Ayame stopped her. “If I find out you were eavesdropping…”

“I understand. Yes ma'am!” 

Once Tamami was gone, Ayame walked over to Hinako, handing her a tissue.

“I'm sorry it had to happen like this.” Ayame started. 

“I don't blame them. I don't deserve to be happy and pursuing my dream when my father robbed a bunch of people of theirs. I probably look super selfish, even if I am doing this to help them…” Hinako sniffled.

“I can neither agree or disagree with that statement.” Ayame said. “What I feel about the victims of your father right now is irrelevant - because they have nothing to do with you being blacklisted.”

“Huh? Then…”

“Hajime. She wrote the letter. Signed it and everything. I shouldn't be surprised. Do not repeat this… but she was the one who told FRIDAY about Tamami's mother…”

“No way! Hajime… she…”

“Yes. I didn't tell the others… but that's why we fought that day. Well… besides her spitting in my face. But my point is, if she's capable of doing that, she's capable of blackmail.”

Hinako suddenly appeared very awake. “Of course… of course… she tried to pay me off the other day. But I didn't take it… why is she sabotaging me like this? Why is she going so far?”

“I'll tell you why.” Ayame answered. “Remember June 15th?”

Hinako paled over and slowly nodded her head. 

“You never apologized, did you?” 

“I… I can't. Not after she hid my letter…”

“Fuck your letter. You are a designer now, without ever stepping foot into that school. It shouldn't matter anymore. Let that grudge go and seriously apologize.”

“But…”

“But nothing. Hajime is probably hurting on the inside - you stabbed her in the back not once but twice. Then you got the bright idea of using her. Not even that… you took advantage of her feelings for you to fulfill a fantasy. Do you know how much that would hurt?”

“I know… I know… but I can't face her… I feel horrible…”

“You feel horrible? Imagine how Hajime felt. No. Imagine how she feels, seeing you act like a new person, when you failed to acknowledge what you did to her. Apologize, okay?”

“Okay. I'll do it.” Hinako nodded. “I'll meet with her and apologize…”

“Good.” Ayame sighed. “As for your clothes… I can still sell them without you… so don't worry about that.”

“Thank you… thank you Ayame.”

Hinako left the room, thinking to herself. She had actually been thinking about apologizing to Hajime for a while, but Ayame's talk had pushed her in the right direction. Apologizing to Hajime wouldn't fix everything, but it would fix something.

Right?

As for Ayame, it took her fifteen minutes to figure out what to do for today's broadcast - Hinako may have gotten blacklisted, but not Tamami. However, as unconfident as Tamami was, she would definitely not make a good co-host. She lacked the airiness of Hinako - she was more reserved. Tamami always had been when it came to public speaking, but it had increased tenfold after what happened with her mother. Ayame could not subject Tamami to that kind of stress. 

The next step was to ask Karin, who agreed to it. The two decided to improvise, which was awkward at first. While Ayame was the ace of all things related to television, Karin was the type who needed a script. Making stuff up on the spot was not her strong suit. Luckily, the two managed to pull it off - just like the week before, all of Hinako's dresses sold out.

That alone should've been a happy ending, but it wasn't. Maybe it was for Tamami, Karin and Hinako, but not for Ayame. Ayame was the type of person who  _ had  _ to get the last word, so for that reason, at the very end of the show, she looked directly into the camera and said,

“It's so unfortunate that Hinako will be unable to join us for the time being. What's even more unfortunate are those who think they can throw their money around and try to scare people out of doing what they enjoy. Twenty million yen. What a waste of money…”

“What are you doing?” Karin asked through her teeth.

Ayame ignored her. “Just remember… scaring my guests off won't stop me from selling their products. They'll be successful regardless. And by the way…” Ayame then lowered her voice. “It'll take more than a video to scare me off the air. I know you're watching...” Then she mouthed, “ _ Hajime Fujiwara.” _

It was then that the production assistants realized what was going on and immediately cut to commercial. Most viewers, if they were still watching, were confused, but thought nothing of it. As for Ayame, she ended up getting lectured by her mom, her dad, the channel director, Karin, and a few of the production assistants for her “reckless stunt”. Of course, she took it all with a smile.

There was nothing wrong with standing up for yourself.

xxxxx

“Wasn't that exhibit so cool…? Who knew pottery could be interesting...”

“Right? I guess there's more to it than we think. Oh! Our Uber is here. Come on, come on!”

A few days later, Saya found herself back at the Rose Cafe, trying to read a fashion magazine. However, her concentration had been broken by two excited high school girls who were at the next table over. Unlike most, Saya wasn't annoyed, but what she was feeling was sadness.

Coming to the Rose Cafe had been hard enough, but hearing the two teens talk about the same pottery exhibit Saya took Hajime to had caused Saya's sadness to get deeper. 

Just thinking about Hajime in general gave Saya very strong emotions - she heard about Hajime's two for the price of one deal of blacklisting Hinako  _ and _ blackmailing Ayame. Whenever the topic of Ayame's fight came up, Saya would excuse herself - she couldn't find enjoyment in it like Tamami and Natalia did. Shit, she even sent Hajime a get well soon card. Saya saw one of Hajime's many controversial status updates - this one being where she stole a group picture from Saya's blog and tore everyone in it down. Something about that one really disturbed Saya - the fact that she tagged everyone in it. Was Hajime lashing out at them because she hated them? Or was that Hajime's way of asking for help? 

Saya just wanted to see her. The last time Saya had physically seen Hajime was months ago… Hajime did post pictures on Facebook but never of herself. She didn't seem to like taking pictures of herself in general. Saya thought back to the art museum trip...

“Should we take a selfie together?” Saya had asked. 

“For your blog?” Hajime's eyes had gotten bigger. 

“Yes and no. I just wanted something to remember this day by…”

“Hmm… okay. Don't post it.”

Saya stared at her phone's lock screen. Despite everything, it was still the selfie from that day. Hajime covered her face with her hands and wasn't actually looking at the camera.

“How do you like it?” Saya asked.

“You're way cuter than me...” Hajime said slowly, then she smiled and changed the subject to a nearby vase.

Then Saya remembered something else she saw. Sumi had uploaded a picture of Hajime on a beach in Singapore. “Look at my pretty daughter~!” the caption read. 

It was a bad picture - Hajime's face was red and swollen vand it appeared that she had gotten chubbier since Natalia's pool party. Cue Hajime having a meltdown in the comments section, exploding on anyone who left a positive comment about her - which was most of the commenters. By the next morning, the post was gone.

Then she thought about the very last thing that Hajime had said to her - “We're done. Don't ever talk to me again.”

_ Why didn't I say something back then? Should I reach out to her? Sure we may be “done” but I'm really concerned… _

As Saya was thinking this over, she noticed a couple in a booth a few feet away. But this wasn't just any couple - it was Sumi and Takashi Fujiwara. Hajime's parents! She decided to listen in. They of all people would know. They had to!

“Thank you for coming. I would talk about this with you at home but I don't want Hajime around to hear.” Sumi started. 

“We should've talked in your office. Hajime might be here.”

“She’s not. I gave her sleeping pills and some warm milk before I left and made sure she was sleep before meeting you here…” Sumi explained. “I've been really concerned about her…”

“Explain.”

“Last night I woke up to go to the bathroom when I noticed the light on downstairs. I thought I left it on… turns out Hajime is down there, pacing the floor… at 4 am. She looked very worried about something but when I asked… she got mad, yelling for me to mind my business. When I came home from work, I asked her what time she went to bed. Hajime told me she didn't go to bed. She'd been up for 28 hours… that's why I made sure she got some sleep before leaving.”

“Well… that's why you don't bring complete strangers into our home.” Takashi said. “But since you want to talk about  _ her _ … I checked my bank account the other day and 20 million yen was missing. You have no reason to take my money. I definitely didn't make that withdrawal. I have no idea what's going on but I don't like it.”

“We're her parents. We should find out.”

“No we are not. She's our daughter… but there's no emotional connection. There isn't, for her to steal that amount of money from me. As I told you before… that girl is nothing but a gold-digger. I want her out by the end of the week.”

“Takashi. I'm not going to stand for this. With the way she's been behaving… her erratic mood swings, the theft, her insistence that everyone hates her… I don't think she's mentally stable enough to live alone. Do you know what that would do to our reputations? Do you know how embarrassing it is? Erina's daughter is a student at Yale. Reina's daughter is a company executive. And us? Our daughter belongs in a padded room somewhere, tied up. She's crazy. How embarrassing.”

“For the last time… she's not our daughter. Stop saying that.”

Saya had heard enough. She was  _ super  _ disgusted by what they were saying. Saya would've confronted them but the last thing she wanted was to accidentally hurt Hajime in the process. Besides, Hajime's health came first - she could come for Sumi and Takashi later.

Saya knew that she should've trusted her instincts! She wouldn't be able to sleep at night knowing that Hajime only had Sumi and Takashi to rely on. Her decision had been made. She was going to Hajime's house!

xxxxx

Despite Sumi's insistence that her sleeping pills were “the best of the best”, Hajime only found herself sleeping for two hours. When she woke up, Hajime went downstairs and watched the second half of Ayame's show. Hinako's dresses must've been covered in the half she missed, because today Ayame and Karin were selling soap dishes. Hajime found that boring, and she was about to turn the TV off, until the very end of the show.

“It'll take more than a video to scare me off the air.” Ayame had said. Hajime was  _ livid _ . She threw the remote into the television, wishing it was Ayame herself. She had no idea what to do - Ayame seemed to be challenging Hajime to leak the video. But there was no video! Sumi deleted it! The sole reason why Hajime included that much money in the first place was because there was no video! And of course, Ayame didn't seem to care. She had always been disrespectful towards Hajime… always!

After stewing over Ayame for thirty minutes, Hajime went back to her room. She tried to read the newest issue of Ceramics Monthly, but she only made it to the table of contents before throwing the magazine across the room. So now, Hajime had been laying on her bed, watching as the sky changed in the nearest window. She was just staring, feeling lifeless - she was too weak and tired to even think. The good thing was, the early fall sky was calming. 

Then Fumika messaged her, and the two talked about how much they hated Hinako.

“I got her blacklisted from appearing on TV.” Hajime typed. 

“You're so cool.” Fumika said. “I'm so grateful for you. All the Kitas are sinners, and Hinako is no different. I'd love to talk to her one day.”

“She's a braindead idiot who swears she's a princess! You'd have better luck talking to a wall.”

This went on for about an hour, until Fumika suddenly had to go. With her gone, Hajime went back to staring at the sky - when she remembered something Saya had said,

_ “Personally, I like it when it's sunny and there's big fluffy white clouds in the sky. I used to make shapes out of the clouds. I still do.” _

Just thinking about Saya was enough for Hajime to burst into tears. She cried until she couldn't cry anymore… until she felt like a fool. There was no way Saya was thinking about Hajime anymore - why was Hajime crying over her? Now feeling angry at herself, Hajime was getting ready to hate read Everyday Saya when the doorbell rang. As she was home alone, Hajime had to answer. She skipped the process of turning on the intercom and the camera and opened the gate and the door… only to see that it was Saya.

The two girls stared at each other awkwardly. Hajime felt rather embarrassed because she wasn't sure when the last time she took a shower was, and she looked as crappy as she felt. Saya, on the other hand, noticed how sickly Hajime looked - she looked fragile and was pale, with dark circles under her eyes, which were swollen. Had Hajime been crying? Saya could see the dried tears on her face. Even Hajime's hair, which Saya had said looked healthy and shiny, no longer looked that way.

“Can I help you?” Hajime asked in a low voice. She seemed to be growling it out. 

Saya did her best to not appear intimidated. “I just wanted to say hi.”

“Well you said it, so get out of here.” Hajime began to close the door, but Saya stuck her foot in the doorway.

“Wait. Um… I'm not going to say anything about you stealing my picture, or what you did to Ayame and Hinako. That's not important right now. What's important is... how have you been feeling lately?”

“Fine. I'm feeling fine.”

“Fine?” Saya repeated, then doing her best not to sound accusatory, she added. “You don't look fine. You look sick”

“Well…” Hajime sighed. She didn't know how to respond. On one hand she wanted to tell Saya everything, how she had been unable to eat or sleep and how her emotions seemed to be strangling her. But on the other hand… it was Saya. Could she trust her?

Of course not. Hajime could get through this alone. 

“It’s only a fever....” Hajime smiled. “But don't worry. The worst of it is over. Why are you here again? Our friendship is over. Remember? Or are you feeling self righteous today?”

Saya shook her head. “I only came because I was at the Rose Cafe. I can't help but to think of you when I'm there… and I really miss you. Also… I saw your parents, and…”

“Sumi? Takashi?” Hajime laughed hysterically. “No way… No way! Those people aren't my parents. Mother? Father? She treats me as a toy. He calls me a gold digger. I'm nothing to them, and they're nothing to me.”

“Which is why I'm here…” Saya's voice trailed off as Hajime stopped laughing. 

“Well don't care about me. Everything was fine before you showed your face. Just looking at you makes me sick! There's no way you care about me. Get out of here, you fucking liar!”

“Hajime, wait!”

“I said, get out of here!”

Hajime pushed Saya off of the porch and into a nearby bed of flowers. Saya quickly got up and ran back to the front door, which was now closed. 

“Hajime! Hajime! Please talk to me!” Saya shouted, beating on the door with her fist. She didn't get an answer. Unbeknownst to her, Hajime was still on the other side of the door, crying softly to herself. 

This went on for about ten minutes before Saya finally decided to give up. She stepped off the porch, and began to walk towards the gate. 

Despite everything, Saya was not going to let Hajime push her away like this.

xxxxx

The next morning, or what Hajime believed was morning, Hajime woke up surrounded by torn pieces of paper. What had happened? She didn't get drunk, as there was no hangover. All Hajime had to do was flip over a piece of paper to understand what had happened.

Despite not liking being on camera, if one of her friends asked her for a picture, Hajime would agree to it. She had a bulletin board filled with pictures - key word, had. Sometime between Saya's visit and whenever Hajime fell asleep, Hajime decided to tear each and every picture up. The scary thing was, Hajime had no memory of doing this. 

She laid there for a while, before finally deciding to get up. Knowing Saya, she'd probably be back eventually. Why? Because Hajime hadn't been taking care of herself. Hajime figured that the best solution was to try her best to act as though everything was normal. This way, Saya, or anyone else for that matter, wouldn't have anything to worry about.

She cleaned up her room and then took a long shower. After getting dressed, Hajime was going to try to find something to eat, but she got a distraction in the form of a text message… from Hinako. 

“Hajime! How are you doing these days?” it read.

Hajime stared at her phone, clutching it tightly. She didn't know how to feel; did she love Hinako, or did she hate her? Hajime put her conflicting feelings aside as she replied,

“I came down with a fever, but I'm okay now.”

“That's good. I'm glad you're feeling better.” Hinako then sent another message. “I really want to talk to you in person. It's about something super important!”

Hajime's face grew hot as she stared at Hinako's message. Speaking in person? About something super important? While it could've been about Hajime's recent behavior, Hajime chose to believe that the topic was going to be more positive. Hajime believed that Hinako had a crush on her this entire time, and the only reason why she acted out, was because she was trying to hide it!

Believing that was the truth, the two arranged to meet in two hours at Hinako's house. Hajime was over the moon - she'd finally get her chance at happiness!

xxxxx

Hajime found being in Hinako's room very surreal. When was the last time she was here? Back when she smashed up Hinako's dolls? Now Hinako only had two - one of the fancy porcelain ones that she liked, and a Barbie that looked very similar to Hinako.

Of course, Hajime was mentally preparing to replace all of the dolls she had broken. Wasn't that what girlfriends did?

As Hajime was staring at the two dolls, Hinako was sitting on her bed, watching. She was trying her hardest to figure out a way to approach this subject. Finally, it came to her - small talk and then onto the important part.

“Aren't they cute? Elizabeth and Eugenie are such great friends… even though they are different, Elizabeth takes good care of Eugenie.” 

“Eugenie?”

“Yes, the Barbie. She had a tragic past, but she is moving on to a brighter future.” Hinako said.

“How did you get Eugenie anyway?” Hajime asked. “I thought you preferred fancier dolls…”

“She was a gift. I made her dress, because the sender forgot to include her clothes.”

“You're so talented…” Hajime gushed. “I wish I had such a gift…”

“Pottery?” Hinako reminded her. 

“No.” Hajime shook her head. “I'm average.”

“But if you were average, the teachers at school wouldn't show your work at our school's art show. You wouldn't have won first prize either. Not everyone can say they won first prize every year for ten years.”

“Neither can I.” Hajime sighed miserably. “The only reason why they gave me the prize is because they pitied me and my upbringing. They wanted to make themselves look good, by giving the poor orphan a chance to shine.”

“Well I think you're good.”

“At least someone does…”

The two fell into an awkward, heavy silence, as Hinako had forgotten why Hajime was here in the first place. But then she remembered, once she saw her tennis bracelet on the bedside table. Ever since the incident where Hinako had gotten jumped by Subaru, Akane, and Mizuki, she had stopped wearing it. And Hinako had no interest in putting it back on, in light of everything Hajime had done, and due to self reflection on Hinako's part.

Hinako motioned towards an empty section on her bed. “I think I should tell you what I called you here for. Please sit.”

Hajime sat down next to Hinako and smiled at her. Hinako had no idea why Hajime was smiling, or why her face had gotten rosy, but that wasn't going to stop her.

“I have something for you.” Hinako started.

_ Here it is! She's going to tell me how she feels! Or what if she kisses me? She's going to kiss me! I can feel it!  _ Feeling giddy, Hajime closed her eyes, because she was sure that was what people did when they were getting kissed. She waited patiently, not realizing that Hinako was just staring at her.

“What are you doing?” Hinako asked, and Hajime opened her eyes, feeling embarrassed as Hinako watched her with a serious expression. She was also holding her bracelet in her hands.

“I was waiting.” Hajime told her. “Do what you need to do. I have butterflies in my stomach, but the good kind!”

_ What is she talking about? _ Hinako asked herself. Regardless, she handed Hajime the bracelet. “I called you here because I wanted to apologize to you for everything.” Hinako started. “It was very immature and wrong for me to take advantage of you just to be a 'princess’. I shouldn't have pretended to apologize to you. I shouldn't have talked to Tamami about you either…” 

“It's fine.” Hajime said. “But why are you giving this back?”

“Because I don't deserve it. I've been such a shitty friend towards you… I know this apology is very overdue, but I haven't matured until very recently. I am very sorry for burdening you all this time.”

“I accept your apology…” Hajime began to stroke Hinako's hair, despite how uncomfortable Hinako appeared to be getting. “I'm glad you matured. Now we can be girlfriends like we were always meant to be.”

“What?” Hinako pushed Hajime off of her. “Do you think I called you here because I wanted to confess?”

“Why else would you call me here?” Hajime leaned forward, as if she were going to kiss Hinako. Hinako grabbed a nearby pillow and covered her face with it.

“I called you here because I wanted to apologize for everything I have done.” Hinako reminded her. “Not because I like you… I'm really sorry Hajime. I know you like me a lot… but I feel uncomfortable dating you with everything going on.”

“You mean with your father and paying the victims?” Hajime asked, then she smiled, taking out her wallet. She held out a stack of bills. “Don’t worry. I'll take care of that. You don't have to worry about anything with me, because you're my Cinderella.”

“Please don't call me that.” Hinako frowned. She ignored Hajime's money and continued. “I think it's time for me to learn how to stand on my own… I want to focus on achieving my dream.”

“That's perfectly valid.” Hajime put the money back. “But still… I'll support you, because that's what girlfriends do.”

Hinako hesitated for a bit. “...Hajime. I guess I should tell you how I feel… I'm glad that you like me. Really glad, I swear. But I don't… I don't see you in the same way.”

Hajime's smile faded as Hinako's words registered with her. “You don't?”

“Yes… even before all of this stuff happened, I saw you as my sister. You've always been my older sister. But not anymore… I think that… as much as it pains me to say it… I think that we should both go our separate ways.”

“What do you mean?” Hajime's eyes were full of terror as she grabbed onto Hinako's wrist. “You can't leave me! You can't leave me! I can't live without you… I  _ need  _ you! You don't understand…”

Hinako shook her head. “I don't think you understand. How can you say such things after blacklisting me from appearing on TV? Or setting me up like you did at the meeting? You tore up my picture of my mother and shattered all my dolls. Just recently, you called my dream a delusion. I admit… I was far from a good friend, but the stuff you did…”

“I know! I know! I was wrong! I won't do it again! I swear. I'm different… please listen to me Hinako!” Tears cascaded from Hajime's eyes as if they were a waterfall. “I love you! Please don't leave me… I can't live without you. No… I won't live without you! I refuse! What about in the future? In the future we can date, right? Right?! Please tell me…”

“I'm sorry, but we bring out the worst in each other… we shouldn't be dating, or even friends. Especially since…”

“Since…?” Hajime stopped crying. There was a small bit of hope in her voice.

“That day you set me up… I saw your eyes. What I saw scared me … and even now … I can't help but to think about you and Ayame's fight. Your state at the fabric store was shocking, and Saya is really worried about you. I'm really worried too. Your behavior, online and offline, is really... I don't know what is going on… but you need help. I don't think it's wise for you to be in a relationship right now… not until you feel better.”

Hajime let go of Hinako's wrist, staring at it as it fell into Hinako's lap. The two sat in silence for five minutes, until Hajime started laughing. The sound was unsettling - despite being loud, her laughter was empty. The sound gave Hinako goosebumps.

“You… you're just like everyone else.” Hajime said. “It doesn't matter that we grew up in the same position. I guess it doesn't matter that your father is a legitimate murderer.  _ Everyone _ can look down on Hajime Fujiwara. Not only is she the poor orphan daughter of scammers, but she's a crazy bitch too!”

“You're not crazy and I don't look down on you! Stop it!”

“I'm not crazy?! You don't look down on me? Like all you guys don't all make fun of me? All of you are liars! Liars!”

Hajime grabbed a metal ruler from the bedside table and then jumped on Hinako, pinning her to the wall. There was a power struggle for a bit, until Hajime ended up slicing Hinako's neck. While she didn't cut deep enough to kill her, or let alone cause any serious injuries, Hinako felt herself bleeding and ended up kicking Hajime off of her.

Hajime fell to the ground, still holding the ruler in her non casted hand. There seemed to be a look of regret in her eyes. Hinako, who was holding her wound and struggling to get her breath back, had started tearing up. She was shaken by this turn of events, but who wouldn't be?

“Please leave… please leave and never come back.” Hinako finally managed to say. 

Hajime didn't say anything else, but she left the apartment. With her gone, Hinako went to the bathroom, cleaned her wound, and then with a shaky hand, texted Natalia and asked her if she could spend the night at her house - but on the condition that Natalia meet her there. As Natalia was working right now, she didn't get an answer, so the next person to call was…

“Hinako?” Saya was doing her best to sound friendly, but she was confused. Even though Hinako had her number, she hadn't actually been expecting for Hinako to call her. Saya believed that Hinako didn't really like her, due to the former's friendship with Hajime.

“Saya…” Hinako started sobbing loudly, and she cried for about ten minutes. Saya just listened, not saying anything. 

“I have something to tell you.” Hinako said as soon as she calmed down.

“What's up?”

“It's about Hajime…”

xxxxx

After getting kicked out of Hinako's apartment, Hajime had no choice but to go home. She felt like her soul left her body, she was that exhausted. The events that transpired earlier didn't feel real. All Hajime wanted was to be left alone - and she got her wish. Sumi and Takashi had some of their friends over for movie night, and Hajime could've sworn she heard Takashi call Hajime his “gold-digger of a daughter”, which their friends found funny.

But she couldn't trust her mind these days, so Hajime continued upstairs, not stopping until she reached her bedroom. Everything was the same as she left it, except there was a box on her bed. It was a present, addressed to just “Hajime Fujiwara’. She opened it up, and found a weighted blanket inside, along with a note.

_ Hajime, _

_ I'm going to respect your wish for the time being and give you some space. With that being said, even though we aren't friends anymore, I got you something to help you with your sleep problems. I remember you saying that you feel like you don't deserve anything, but you at least deserve the ability to sleep well. I hope this helps.  _

_ Saya _

Hajime folded the note back up and set it down on her desk. Then she changed her clothes and after agonizing over it for an hour (Did Saya get the blanket to help her? Or was she doing it to mock her?) she decided to go to sleep, using Saya's gift for her. 

Much to Hajime's surprise, she actually ended up sleeping more than two hours. When she woke up, she felt refreshed and actually in a good mood for once. 

Until she saw Hinako's ruler and remembered everything that happened the night before.

Hajime tore the blanket off of her bed and threw it into her closet. “How dare she?!” Hajime shouted. “Fucking bitch, using me as a publicity stunt for her blog! I'm going to kill her!”

“Are you okay up there?” Sumi yelled from downstairs. 

Hajime ignored her and got back in her bed, thinking. She was trying to draft up another messy Facebook status, but her concentration was shot. Her brain was too foggy to focus on anything that wasn't happening right now. 

It wasn't until she got a message from Fumika that she remembered where she was, who she was, and what she was doing.

“One of my neighbors is wearing a dress made by Hinako. It makes me sick that she can succeed as a designer, despite everything her father has done.”

“Okay.” Hajime replied, thinking.  _ Why are you telling me this? _

“I just really want to talk to her. There's so much I want to say…”

“Do you really want to talk to her?” Hajime questioned. “I think you should. Here.”

Hajime inserted Hinako's address in, then she continued. “She also frequents Hakozaki Fabrics… I don't care what you do with this information. I just have one request from you.”

“And what's that?”

“Take her smile away.”

“That's a tall order. Will you pay me?”

“I'll do whatever I need to do. Just make her regret being born.”

 


	17. XVII

XVII

Three days had passed since Hinako and Hajime had their incident, and the day after, Hinako had found herself back at home. As for Natalia, she was a little suspicious of Hinako's visit, but she quickly warmed up. Even though Hinako didn't say anything about what had happened, Natalia could just tell that something was up. She assumed that Hajime was the issue - that Hinako was bummed out over being blacklisted. Of course, she was half way right.

The two spent the rest of the night talking and watching movies on Netflix. As usual, Hinako suggested Cinderella, but Natalia, sick of Cinderella, put her foot down and  decided to show movies from her home country. (with Japanese subtitles of course, so Hinako could follow along)

“Let's try watching something different.” Natalia suggested.

And the Brazilian movies were different to Hinako, but in a good way. By the end of the night, she had forgotten about everything that had happened.

The next afternoon, Hinako decided to sneak onto Natalia's computer and check Hajime's Facebook. Hinako was _sure_ that Hajime posted something passive aggressive, like she was prone to doing these days.

Hinako was absolutely right. At 4:30 am, Hajime had posted something that had gone unnoticed by everyone else, as there were no likes or comments.

_“Just looking at you makes me want to cut you into pieces. I see you on TV and I feel like there's a bunch of ants crawling on my skin. Hinako Kita… do you think your life will be easy because you're a designer now? Do you think you're better than me? You're slow and dumb. You look like a drowned rat with brain damage. You're just like your father. I'm going to hang you with the fabric you use. I'll do it publicly so everyone can see. Everyone will love me for it. Why do you deserve to be happy and I don't? I'm going to kill you. Arisa Kita doesn't deserve a daughter like you… maybe your dad would've loved her if she gave him a good daughter, not you. I want miso cod…”_

The rest of the status was Hajime talking to herself, rambling about how she wanted miso cod. Then she started talking about wanting to be held. Then she wished she was a fish, then wondering if it hurt when fish were removed from water. The post ended abruptly.

The status message had been written weirdly - with the exception of Hinako's name, the entire update was written in hiragana. There were spelling errors everywhere, as well as random punctuation. The whole thing was bizarre, but Hinako was stewing over the comment about her mother.

She slammed the computer shut, not even closing out the browser.

“Natalia! I'm going home!” Hinako announced. She was trying to act cheerful, but deep inside, she was livid. As much as Hinako wanted to rant to Natalia, she didn't want to dump the memories of Arisa and Yusuke's relationship on her. That was what Elizabeth and Eugenie were for!

Natalia, who was in another room, talking to someone on the phone in Portuguese, turned her attention to Hinako. “Do you want me to go with you?”

“You don't have to!” Hinako smiled. “I'll be fine…”

“Okay… well I'll see you later then.” Natalia put her phone call on hold and let Hinako out. She had began to wonder why Hinako's mood seemed to change so fast, but didn't think much of it. She got back on the phone with her cousin, Lucio, who was calling all the way from Brazil.

The conversation lasted for a few more minutes, until they decided to end it - they were both about to run out of LINE credits and neither wanted to buy more. After hanging up, Natalia looked around the apartment, stopping once she noticed that Hinako left one of her hats.

 _Of course… she's always leaving stuff here. I could give it to her at work tomorrow, but… oh wait she doesn't work with me anymore._ Natalia thought. She then decided to take the hat over to Hinako's, so she could also find out what had happened.

The trip should've been quiet. And it was, until Natalia was around the corner from Hinako's apartment. She was walking past the alleyway, where the dumpsters were, when she heard a disturbing sound.

“Please… please… let's talk about it. There's no need to get violent…”

It sounded like Hinako, Natalia observed. She went into the alley, where surely enough, Hinako was being cornered by a black haired girl who looked somewhat familiar. Natalia's attempts to figure out who she was came to an end though, when she noticed that the girl was holding a baseball bat.

“All I can do is get violent!” the girl shouted. “It's the only way I can get through to heartless people like you!”

“Please don't do something you will regret. Please, please, please! I'm sorry you lost your unborn child, but…”

“She would've been ten!” the girl then picked up her bat and swung it into Hinako's knees. The sequence of sounds that followed would haunt Natalia for days - the sound of bones cracking, the sound of Hinako hitting the ground, Hinako's scream. It lasted for only five seconds, as the black haired girl didn't stop with the bat. She beat Hinako into silence. Natalia, noticing how she was about to smash Hinako's skull in, had finally snapped out of her state of shock, ran the black haired girl into the wall with so much force that she ended up dropping the bat.

Natalia kicked it down the other end of the alleyway and the other girl laughed manically, pointing at Hinako, who was unconscious.

“Go ahead! Call the police! Tell them everything that I did! You can even tell them my name. I'm Fumika Sagisawa! I don't care about going to jail! Turn me in! I only did what I had to do! Turn me in!”

Fumika's madness was too much for Natalia, who felt frozen. Luckily, Hinako's screaming had attracted the attention of several residents. A small crowd had ran out, and someone in that crowd had the sense to call emergency services. Natalia felt helpless as she watched Hinako get lifted into the ambulance, but she suddenly became assertive as she noticed Fumika getting handcuffed.

“Why?” Natalia demanded. She had walked over as soon as she noticed Fumika was trying to get forced into the police car.

Time seemed to slow down as Fumika made eye contact with her. “I was only doing what I had to do. I was told to take her smile away… and that's what I did.”

“Who told you to do such a thing?” Natalia demanded.

The two cops - Sanae Katagiri and Hideo Akuno had slowed down a bit. They had read Fumika her rights, but they wanted to know if she was stupid enough to incriminate herself.

And lo and behold, she was.

“My special friend… Hajime Fujiwara.” Fumika answered. Natalia's heart had felt like it had gotten struck by lightning. The last time she had felt such a way was back when her parents broke the news that they were leaving Brazil. Of course, this was worse.

Much, much worse.

“Okay. That's enough out of you. Get in the car.” Sanae ordered.

But even as Sanae closed the door, Fumika kept going. “She said she would pay me! It was an offer I couldn't refuse!”

“She just keeps digging a bigger hole for herself.” Sanae told her partner. “What an idiot. It's like she wants to get caught. I've never seen this before.”

“Well… it's possible. Let's go drop her off. Then we can go investigate this further.” Hideo then turned to Natalia. “Will you be alright…?”

“I'll be fine…” Natalia answered, even though she wasn't exactly sure. “Do you know which hospital my friend is going to?”

“Morita Hospital.” Hideo answered. “Don't worry… if your friend doesn't make it… Fumika will be getting charged with premeditated murder.”

“Don't say things like that.” Sanae snapped. “Get in the car. As for you…” she turned her attention back to Natalia. “If you know anything about this… this is my business card.”

Natalia accepted the card, trying to remain strong as the two officers drove off with Fumika. Once they were gone, all Natalia could do was fall to her knees, and cry.

xxxxx

The days following Hajime and Hinako's incident were a bit too quiet for Hajime's liking. Of course they had been quiet, Hajime's sleep schedule had been so messed up that she found herself staying up all night. The nights quickly became days and soon she'd find herself staying up for 30 hours at a time. Sumi's sleeping pills could only do so much - Hajime had built a tolerance towards them.

The night before, Hajime had gotten nostalgic and could not stop thinking about Hinako. The memories were excessive and intrusive, and Hajime found herself getting disgusted by her behavior. So how did she cope?

She went downstairs and drank whatever she could. Hajime couldn't remember anything - all she remembered was going downstairs at 4 am, and then waking up on the kitchen floor a few hours later.

That was Takashi's doing, or lack thereof. Sumi would usually move Hajime to the couch or her bed, depending on if she passed out upstairs or downstairs. As for today, Hajime woke up in pain, due to her hangover, her hunger, and the fact that the kitchen floor was a hard surface.

She walked upstairs and then fell asleep, not waking up until 8 pm. She decided to go downstairs, where Sumi and Takashi were watching TV. But not just any channel - they were watching HBS, where Ayame was on air, being cheery as usual. There was a full moon special going on.

“How many things have you bought from this channel?” Takashi asked his wife during the next commercial break.

“As many things as I deserve.” Sumi pouted. “And besides… we need some new decor. Fall is the best season to decorate the house.”

“Not Christmas? You're so different, but that's why I love…” Takashi's voice trailed off as he noticed Hajime longingly staring at them both.

“Hajime? Good evening! Why don't you join us? You can help me pick out what kind of decorations I should get…” Sumi smiled at her, but the smile went unreturned.

“No.” Takashi turned to Hajime. “Don't join us. My day was already stressful enough…”

“And looking at me makes it so much worse.” Hajime snapped.

“So while you're a lazy, good for nothing gold-digger, you at least have self awareness. We all must start somewhere.”

“Takashi.” Sumi started.

“Would it kill you to call me Hajime?” Hajime asked through her teeth. “My name is Hajime. Ha-ji-me. Way easier to say than ‘gold-digger’.”

“What are you going to do if I don't?” Takashi challenged. “You're a guest in my home, so act like it. Treat me with respect.”

“Guys.” Sumi attempted yet again.

“Treat me with respect.” Hajime said mockingly. “Okay. You can't respect that my name is Hajime, so from now on I'm calling you Motherfucker. We're even now.”

“I'm going upstairs.” Takashi announced, leaving the room.

“Wait!” Sumi yelled after him, then she turned to Hajime. “I know things are hard for you right now, but can you please get it together? The last thing I want is to get a divorce over you.”

“I'm sorry.” Hajime apologized.

“Sorry isn't good enough.” Sumi then ran upstairs and Hajime fell onto the couch, feeling weighed down by everything. She couldn't even move - so she had no choice but to watch Ayame on TV. It seemed that before the commercial break, Ayame seemed to be acting normally. Now she was being super quiet, with Karin being forced to do most of the talking. Hajime found this funny - as nice as Karin was, she was super awkward.

“What do you think about these spoons?” Karin had asked, this was probably the 3rd time she asked that question. Ayame seemed to be spacing out.

“Huh…?” Ayame then realized where she was. “They're pretty… pretty fancy.”

“Yes! It looks like something a queen would own.” Karin turned to the audience. “Say, Ayame. Do you think the queen would own these spoons?”

Ayame didn't answer, but her eyes seemed to appear glassier. Karen noticed this, and her excitement faded away.

“...Ayame?”

Ayame smiled, even though she was super close to tears. “She would… the entire royal family would approve of these.”

“I feel like a princess just looking at them. Don't you?”

Whatever Ayame had been holding in could not be held in any longer. Much to the surprise of Hajime, Karin, and the viewers, Ayame started sobbing on live TV.

“Ayame.” Karin attempted yet again, only for the show to awkwardly cut to commercial. A few minutes later, the show was back, but Ayame had been replaced by a different host, a girl named Akari. Hajime watched to the end, and she was very surprised to see that Ayame did not come back. Ayame was the type of girl who kept the show going even during earthquakes. What was going on?

xxxxx

“I'm so glad you two are here.” Natalia greeted. She was trying to appear as happy as possible, but it was hard. Hinako still hadn't woken up yet, and the prognosis was dim. It was very likely that she wouldn't wake up, or if she did, she wouldn't be the same Hinako that they all knew - mentally or physically.

“She may have to rely on you more.” the doctor told her.

The thought of Hinako being completely different was hard to swallow - Natalia would try her best to help out, considering how Hinako literally had no one else. As Hinako had no living family, the only alternative was for her to go into a home. Natalia didn't want that, but she was afraid. Hinako was like a child, she was easy to take advantage of as it is. What if something even worse happened? After crying in the alleyway, Natalia decided to go into Hinako's apartment and bring her some of her things. Naturally, the first thing Natalia grabbed was Eugenie… Natalia found herself pulling a Hinako and ranting to her as she got the rest of her stuff. It helped a little bit.

As for now, she had busied herself by watching the TV in the hospital waiting room, which had been turned on to the HBS Full Moon Special. Ayame was killing it as usual. Halfway through, Natalia decided to text Tamami and Saya, especially telling Tamami not to tell Ayame until after the show was over. She told them about the attack and what the nurse had told her. Of course, she didn't tell anyone about Fumika's comment on Hajime. All Saya could say was “oh my God.”

Tamami did not listen, if Ayame crying on live broadcast meant anything. At first, Natalia was pissed, but then she changed her tune when she noticed that the two were at the hospital. Ayame seemed to have dragged Tamami here as soon as she left the show.

Ayame didn't say anything. Instead, she walked over to the chairs and sat there, staring at the ground. That left Tamami with Natalia.

“How is she? Can we see her?”

“No… it was such a hassle to prove that I was 'related’ to Hinako…” Natalia rolled her eyes. “The doctors seriously thought I couldn't speak Japanese but they got the shock of their lives when I started talking. Douchebags… only issue is… the paperwork. There are some words I can't understand…”

“Leave it to me.” Tamami told her.

“Thank you.” Natalia handed Tamami the clipboard and Tamami began to look over it. As she was doing that, Natalia noticed Ayame. “How is Ayame taking it?”

“Badly.” Tamami answered. “She thinks it's her fault, since Hinako was on her show. She said she wouldn't be able to live with herself if Hinako suffers irreversible damage.”

“Oh shit…”

“She also said that if she wouldn't have tried to one-up Hajime, this wouldn't have happened. Would it? I don't know…

“Ah… Hajime.”

“What about her? Does she know?”

“Do you see her?” Natalia snapped, then she calmed down. “We should message her once Hinako's condition stabilizes. I don't want to be around her longer than I have to.”

“Same… but what about Saya?”

“She's coming tomorrow. Her mother and father actually share a birthday, and it's today. They're celebrating right now and she can't get out of it.”

“I trust her. I mean, it's Saya. Do you think she will tell Hajime?”

“Who knows…”

The girls fell into silence - neither of them wanted to talk about Hajime. As they were talking, someone had changed the channel on the TV, this time to a movie channel. From what Natalia could see, it was an older movie, and it was a feel-good movie involving a single mother and her elementary school aged daughter. The female lead was tucking her daughter into bed, and stroking her hair.

“How much do you love me?” the little girl asked.

“I love you more than anything else. You are the light of my life, Asami.”

Natalia didn't think much of it, but that changed once she heard the sound of Tamami's clipboard hitting the ground. It was then that Natalia realized - the female lead was none other than Tamami's mother. With the way Tamami's face was starting to redden, and how she was tearing up, it was clear that Tamami wasn't taking this well.

“Are you okay?” Natalia asked, picking up the clipboard.

“Don't worry about me… we're here for Hinako.” Tamami reminded her. ”I'm fine… it's just a movie. It's _just_ a movie.”

“Tamami… it may be a movie but…”

“Don't concern yourself… it's a work of fiction. It's not real. I don't know why I'm acting like this… it's not like she ever treated me like that.  She always said I was too sensitive, but

...”

“You aren't being too sensitive. That's your -”

“Don't worry about me. Let's worry about Hinako right now…”

“Seriously. Is everything alright? I know your birthday was a few days ago. Did she reach out to you…?”

Tamami snatched the clipboard away from Natalia. “Don't worry about it!” she snapped. “For the last time… we're here for Hinako!”

“Excuse me…” a nurse had appeared in front of them. Natalia was expecting for the nurse to scold Tamami for getting loud, but the nurse had a different idea.

“I have some good news for you. Hinako has woken up and she seems to be responsive. We will be moving her to a different room later, and you may stay with her there, starting tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow?” Natalia repeated. “Well… okay. Fine.”

“Tomorrow? Is there any reason why we can't see her tonight? Even for five minutes?” Ayame asked, and everyone found themselves getting startled. How long had she been standing there?

“Oh my God…” the nurse covered her mouth once she noticed Ayame. “It's you… um… this may be super inappropriate, but… can I have your autograph? I'm a big fan…”

Ayame held out her hand as the nurse handed Ayame a pen and a piece of paper. “Sure. But only on the condition that you let us see Hinako tonight. Five minutes.”

“All three? I mean… I'm not supposed to, but…”

“That isn't necessary. Two of us is fine.” Ayame handed the autograph to the nurse, a forced smile on her face.

“Oh… your autograph is very cool. Thank you. Okay. I'll let two of you go in.”

There was no question about it - Tamami raised her hand. “Both of you can go. Natalia has been here for hours. Ayame needs the closure. I can see her tomorrow, so, I'll be out here, working on the paperwork.”

“Okay. You two can follow me.”

The nurse lead Natalia and Ayame down the hall, stopping in front of a room. “I’m going to give you two 15 minutes… five minutes isn't enough.”

“Thank you.” Ayame and Natalia said in unison.

“I'll get you when the time is up.”

With the nurse gone, Natalia spoke up.

“I can't believe you just pulled that off.”

“Me either. I don't really like asking for special favors, but… I figured I should try…”

“Well let's go in. Fifteen minutes flies by…”

Ayame suddenly shook her head. “No, no, no… I can't. I want to go back. I'm scared.”

“I get that… I really do. But if Hinako is really in a pitiful state… she would be even more hurt by us deserting her.”

“You're right… okay. Let's go in.”

The two walked into the room, not sure of what to expect. What they saw though, was Hinako, sitting up in the bed, staring outside at the darkness.

“Hinako!” Natalia ran over to her and hugged her, only for Hinako to push her off.

“That hurts…” Hinako told her. “Everything hurts…”

“You have no idea how glad I am to hear your voice…” Ayame told her. “I was so worried…”

“Me too.” Natalia agreed.

“...why are you two here?” Hinako asked slowly, a confused expression on her face. Ayame and Natalia exchanged a nervous look. There was no way… Natalia saw how Ayame appeared to be paralyzed by guilt - all the color was gone from her face.

“Do you know we are?” Natalia asked slowly.

“Yes…” Hinako seemed to be a bit annoyed. “You're Natalia. That's Ayame. I'm Hinako. Did you think I didn't know?”

“Oh thank God.” Ayame sighed of relief. “The nurse said… whatever. That's not important right now. I'm just glad you're not an amnesiac.”

“What does that mean?”

“Amnesia?” Natalia questioned. “When you forget everything?”

“Ah that sounds scary…” Hinako sighed. “But no…” she pointed at the clock in the room. “It's almost 11. I'm surprised you're here. But I'm thankful… we should watch Cinderella.”

“About that… we aren't even supposed to be here right now, but the nurse is a fan of Ayame, so she let both of us come talk to you for fifteen minutes.”

“Celebrity privilege.” Ayame shrugged.

“Yes. I have something for you, actually.”

“You do?” Hinako's eyes got bigger as Natalia handed her the Barbie. “Ah! Eugenie! Thank you so much. I feel a little bit better now… now I won't feel alone.”

“You won't be! We'll be back tomorrow too. Same with Saya and Tamami.”

“Really? I'm so happy…”

The three talked for about ten more minutes, until the nurse had appeared to let them know that their time was up. Tamami was standing in the waiting room when the two walked back.

“How is she?” Tamami demanded.

“She seems to be the same… I was expecting amnesia or something, but she was able to remember us and her doll's name.” Natalia reported.

“That's good. Does she remember Hajime?”

“She should. She remembered everyone else…” Natalia's voice trailed off. “You'd think nothing happened with how cheerful she was.”

“We can't make any assumptions yet… we've only spoken to Hinako for 15 minutes.” Ayame reminded her. “I'm scared…”

“Hinako will probably become different once time passes. So… about Hajime. Are we going to tell her?” Tamami asked.

“Let's wait.” Natalia said, sighing. She was not mentally prepared to deal with Hajime and her attitude problem tonight.

Would she ever be?

xxxxx

The next afternoon, Hajime had woken up from a nap and was once again just staring outside. She had been browsing Facebook when she came across Akira's most recent status update - apparently, she was in Hawaii, visiting Aki. The two looked very happy, which made Hajime's heart hurt. Nothing against Akira, but did Aki have the right to be happy? Hajime didn't think so. To add insult to the injury, Hajime found herself getting jealous of the both of them. They both looked _so_ good in their beach pictures, which made Hajime feel a little salty, if not downright envious. If Hajime got drunk and if she felt emotional enough, she'd start stuffing her face with whatever she could find before passing out. As Sumi pointed out that morning,

“How do you manage to put on weight when I only see you drink tea? I don't think whatever you're doing is healthy… I don't know what you're doing, but it must have something to do with how our liquor just disappears into thin air these days. I was reading something and I need to ask… are you depre-”

“Shut up and go talk to your friends.” Hajime snapped. “Or your husband. I know you and Motherfucker make fun of me. But don't worry. I won't embarrass you or ruin your reputation even further. I won't do anything to make you hate me even more.”

As Hajime was thinking about her “old” life, she had gotten a text message from Saya.

“Have you spoken to Hinako lately?” it read.

“Fuck Hinako.” Hajime responded.

Much to Hajime's annoyance, Saya called her upon receiving that message. Not even exchanging greetings, she got straight to it.

“What the fuck do you _waaant?”_ Hajime whined.

“I don't know what that was about…” Saya started. “But I'll tell you because I don't think it's right for you to be left in the dark.”

“Hmm? What is it?”

“Hinako is in the hospital.” Saya announced. “She got attacked by someone…”

“What?” Hajime asked. Her hatred towards Hinako seemed to melt away as Saya told her the news. Then she remembered the last conversation between her and Fumika. _“Take her smile away.” “Just make her regret being born.”_ Were the two events related? Hajime really hoped not. Despite everything, she didn't really _want_ something bad to happen to Hinako! Hajime didn't consider herself to be that much of a monster! She was only acting on her feelings of being rejected, as intense as those were. She didn't really mean it - but did Fumika realize that?

She gripped the phone tightly, not caring if it cut into her hands. “Is she okay?”

“She's as okay as she can be.” Saya answered, sighing deeply. “I think you should visit her… she would've died if Natalia didn't show up.”

“Okay. What hospital is she in?”

“Morita.”

“Thanks… I'll be there.”

With that, Hajime ended the call and got herself cleaned up. Was this why Ayame had started crying that night on TV? Just how bad was Hinako's condition? There was only one way to find out.

xxxxx

“Do you think my mom is coming soon? Eugenie says she is, so I have to believe her. What do you think?”

Natalia didn't know what to say. She remembered the nurse saying that Hinako might've changed a bit, and she was absolutely right. She seemed a bit younger, if her sudden dependency on Eugenie meant anything. She also seemed more prone to dropping things - that morning, Natalia gave Hinako a cup of cranberry juice, thinking nothing of it. However, Hinako ended up dropping the cup on herself, and the discomfort and the embarrassment caused Hinako to cry - Natalia felt like shit! After calming her down, one of the nurses took Hinako into the bathroom, to clean her up, as another nurse changed the sheets. The three agreed to only give Hinako cups with lids and/or straws until further notice.

On top of that, Momo and Serika had visited the day before. Serika had started crying, but all Hinako could do was stare back at her.

“Who are you guys?” she asked. Hinako's voice was full of fear as Momo got closer. Then when Serika started hugging her, Hinako started screaming, pushing her away.

Natalia quickly took the two outside.

“Why is she being like this?” Serika cried. “She forgot about us, didn't she?”

“It's because of the accident.” Momo said reassuringly, then she turned to Natalia. “Right?”

“Right. I think it might be for the better if you guys come back later. I'll try to tell her who you guys are. But in the meantime…” Natalia turned her attention to Serika. “Try not to be discouraged… Hinako is not herself right now.”

“Will she ever be herself again?” Serika asked.

“Let's think positively.” Momo told her, and then she thanked Natalia for her time. The two left, and she went back into the room, where Hinako had grown distraught.

“I know them… I know them… their voices and faces are familiar… but it isn't sticking. Why isn't it sticking?” she was saying.

“Their names are Momo and Serika Hakozaki.” Natalia explained. “Momo owns a fabric shop - you work there. Serika is her daughter.”

“Serika…” Hinako repeated. “I see… she must be close to me. If Serika is with Momo, then Seito is with my mom. I hope they come soon…”

Natalia nodded, even though she knew that Seito, Hinako's mother, and the other Serika would never show up. The nurse told Natalia to just “play along” with Hinako's delusions for the time being - which was starting to get harder and harder.

As for the present, Natalia was watching as Hinako ate her lunch. Not only did Hinako forget about Momo and Serika, she also had forgotten how to use utensils. Hinako held her fork straight up, stabbing it into her food. Natalia tried to help her hold the fork correctly, but Hinako would always revert back to her problematic method. It wasn't until Hinako snatched the fork away and then banged her fists on the meal tray that Natalia realized there was nothing she could do.

“Just let her eat, but watch her.” Saya had advised. “I'll be back… I need to call someone.”

That was ten minutes ago. Now Saya was back, wiping the rice from Hinako's face, as Hinako started to wonder about her mother.

“Eugenie told you that she was coming?” Saya asked gently. “I'm glad you have such a trustworthy friend.”

“Yes. But sometimes I feel like she's lying to keep me happy. My mom does that a lot…” Hinako shivered. “I don't think she is coming. I think Papa got her.”

“Huh?” Natalia asked. Hinako rarely spoke about her parents. This was unexpected. “What do you mean?”

“The house… Seito… Serika… milk.. ” Hinako shut her eyes tightly and shivered, not saying anything else.

“I think we should watch a movie. Do you want to see Cinderella?” Natalia suggested. She, like most of Hinako's friends, hated Cinderella, but she was willing to put up with it to lighten the mood.

“I want to go home. We can watch it there.” Hinako answered, pointing outside. Hinako's room had a huge window, which overlooked the changing fall foliage. It was pretty to look at, but Hinako wanted to go outside and see it for herself. She had no idea why she was still in the hospital. If she was awake, she should've been allowed to go home, Hinako figured. Maybe then she could see her mother.

“You can't go home just yet.” Saya said gently.

“But I have to.” Hinako insisted. “I have to go home! My mom is stuck in the house… she's probably really lonely, and I need to protect her from him.”

“Protect your mom from who?” Natalia demanded.

“Him!” Hinako's voice got louder, more urgent. “My house is really big, so there's a lot of places my mom can hide, but she can't hide forever!  I need to go home… I need to protect her!”

“Hinako… you can't go home.” Saya repeated, this time a bit more firmly. “You aren't well enough…”

“She's right.” Natalia agreed.

“But I am well enough!” Much to the horror of Saya and Natalia, Hinako ripped the covers off of the hospital bed and then tried running out. However, Hinako didn't make it very far - she took one step out before falling flat on her face. The pain from her legs had been excruciatingly bad, and Hinako immediately started sobbing.

“I just want to leave! I want to go home!” Hinako cried. “I'm tired of being here! I want to go home!”

“What should we do?” Saya asked Natalia, who was shaken.

“We should get her back in the bed.” Natalia suggested. “Or rather, you stay here with Hinako and try to calm her down. I'll go find a nurse…”

“Wait.” Saya spoke up. “After you do that… I think you should go home and rest. You've been here since Hinako had gotten hospitalized.”

“But…”

“Don't worry. I'll be here. Also… Tamami is coming by later. We don't want to overstimulate Hinako right now, and you need the rest.”

“Okay.” Natalia frowned. “I just want to be with her all the time. Is that a bad thing?”

“Of course not.” Saya then turned her attention to Hinako, who was struggling to sit up. “Let me help you.”

“Why aren't my legs working…?” Hinako whimpered, then she flew into hysterics, slapping the floor. “Why aren't my legs working?! I want to leave! I want to go home! I want to walk!” Hinako ended up losing her balance and ended up slumped on the floor, crying softly to herself.

Natalia couldn't take it anymore - would she ever get used to seeing her friend like this? Natalia wasn't sure. She then left the room, walking down the hallway. If she would've walked in the opposite direction, she would've saw Hajime, hiding behind the corner, holding a bouquet of flowers and trying to keep her tears in. She couldn't stop shaking… she had been outside the room the entire time, and had seen and heard everything. Was Hinako like this because of _her_?

Hajime didn't get a chance to answer. She suddenly felt like she was drowning - she had to get out of here. She couldn't breathe and it felt like the walls were closing in on her. Something was constricting her lungs. Her heart was working overtime, and despite the air conditioned hospital, Hajime felt like the heat in the hospital was turned up to 45 degrees. Whatever was happening, Hajime had never felt this way before. It was too intense - she dropped the flowers, and then started running, despite the hospital personnel yelling at her to stop.

A few seconds later, Saya stuck her head out into the hallway, looking for Natalia and the nurse. She had gotten Hinako back in the bed, but a nurse was still needed to check her out after that nasty fall. In the hallway, Saya didn't see anything - except for a bouquet of light blue and light purple hydrangeas, laying face down on the floor. Saya quickly picked them up, trying to see if there was a name attached to it. There was nothing. Saya then looked up to see Hajime, running away. She couldn't see her face, but the sobbing echoing down the hallway told her everything that she needed to know.

At the end of the day, Hajime was still Hajime… right?

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Idk if it's obvious but whenever I use degrees in here I'm using C (as Japan uses) not F (as America uses). If Hajime felt hot in 45°F... lol *laughs in Northeast* 45°C is 113°F, which makes a lot more sense...
> 
> Sanae shows up here, because as long as a cop is needed, it'll be her. Also Hideo is from sideM, he's also a cop. (a lot of fans pair them bc they're both cops and their birthdays are the same me too I guess lol)
> 
> Natalia's cousin being named Lucio is an overwatch reference hehe. Brazilian power duo!
> 
> I'm also laughing at the idea of Takashi Fujiwara and Megumi Himekawa marrying each other (although Megumi at least has the decency to do SPOILER REDACTED that Takashi did not.) Is it possible to ship your OCs? I call them the asshole parents couple 😍
> 
> Next two chapters, (especially chapter 19) shit gets real. Jinkies!


	18. XVIII

XVIII

After running out of the hospital, Hajime ended up going back home. She could try again tomorrow, she told herself. Hinako wouldn't mind if she didn't show up today, would she? Hajime, feeling exhausted by whatever her body had done at the hospital, went straight to her room, with the intention of falling asleep. But first, she dug out the weighted blanket from her closet, and then got under that. But before Hajime could drift off, Saya called her.

“I saw you earlier…” she said. “I don't know what happened… but I hope you are okay.”

“I'm so embarrassing.” Hajime said slowly. “I don't know what happened… all I remember is seeing Hinako, and then the next thing I know… I'm outside of the hospital, feeling like I ran 50 laps in the desert…”

“You don't remember what happened?” Saya asked.

“I don't remember much of anything these days… it's already bad enough that my mind is failing me, but my body too?” Hajime sighed deeply. “Whatever happened… never happened before. I'm honestly scared of myself… I feel like a prisoner in my own body…”

“Hajime… please don't get mad at me for suggesting this, but if you're really feeling that afraid of yourself, you should be seeking professional help… please consider what I'm saying…”

“I can't… Sumi and Takashi would hate me even more.”

“They're toxic and are unfit to be parents... Don't let them stop you from being happy.”

“You say they're toxic and unfit parents but that's my family. I've never had a family before… I just want things to be good between us.”

“They can. Things can still change if you get help. There is nothing wrong with seeking help when you're down…”

“I can't. I can't hurt Sumi's reputation. She blew up at me because I gained 5 kg. Imagine how she'd feel if I ruined her image even further by going to the hospital. She is  _ sooo  _ afraid of having a 'crazy daughter’, when her friend's daughters are executives and graduate students at good universities. As for Takashi… I'm sure such things are expensive. He won't let me hear the end of it if he has to pay for it… since I'm a “gold-digger” to him. But he'd probably just refuse anyway…”

“Then I'll help pay for it.” Saya told her. “I'll do anything to help a friend, even if it takes up all my savings. I just want to see you happy… even if we end up going our separate ways… it's worth it if you're in a better state.”

“I can't let you do that.” Hajime shook her head, even though Saya couldn't see her. “Save your money, and don't worry about me… I can get through this alone. I've gotten through so much on my own already… I can handle it, okay?”

“But you can't…”

“I said I could handle it! I don't deserve your help anyway!” Hajime shouted, throwing her phone across the room. She laid there for a few minutes, trying to relax her racing heart. As she drifted back to sleep, she was sure she could hear her cell phone vibrating. Saya was calling her back, but that call was going to go unanswered. 

xxxxx

Hajime woke up a few hours later, and the first thing she found herself doing was looking for her phone, which had ended up in front of her mirror. Luckily, the phone was in good shape, even though Saya had called her three more times - the last time was thirty minutes ago. She turned the screen off, and then set the phone down onto the dresser. 

She  _ had _ to get Saya and everyone else off of her back. Remembering Hajime's original plan, she decided that it was time to act “normal”... what sort of things did “normal” Hajime do?

Pottery. 

Hajime grabbed a brush and a nearby hair tie and then stood in front of the mirror. She tied her hair into a low ponytail, and then headed towards her closet. Hajime had intended to find some not-so-nice clothes to change into, as pottery was a messy activity. She didn't want to mess up her nice clothes.

However, Hajime didn't make it that far. She had turned around, only to see that Kyoko was sitting at her desk, holding up two halves of one of the pictures that Hajime tore up. She had pieced them together, her expression neutral as she stared.

“What are you doing here?” Hajime demanded, and Kyoko smirked, setting the picture down. From what Hajime could see, it was a picture of Hinako and Hajime from their trip to Roppongi Hills. 

“I just wanted to say hello. You know… I really like you. I'm also really proud of you too...” Kyoko told her. She got closer to Hajime, holding Hajime's hands in her's. “I wanted to apologize for being so rude to you… if I would've known that you're just like me… I would've been way nicer.”

“Well … I accept your apology. It sucks that you're…” Hajime hesitated a bit. “It sucks that you're an angel, because you're the closest thing I have to a friend.” 

“That's so sweet. I've never heard that before.” Kyoko said. 

“Yes… even though you're a supernatural entity, and I'm just a regular human being… I feel a connection with you.”

“I feel the same way…” Kyoko smiled. 

“Even though we're different… you're the only person with my best interests at heart. I'm so happy that you told me that my future would be so ...pitiful. I could change it thanks to you… so tell me… is my future better now?”

“Hmm. I'd say so.” 

“Seriously? Tell me! I need to know!”

Kyoko dropped Hajime's hands and walked over to the mirror. She began to admire herself, but stopped once she noticed Hajime behind her.

“Yes… your future is better. Your mother talks one of her friends at the art museum into letting you display your pottery there. You become famous and everyone loves you.”

“Oh my God, seriously?” Hajime grinned. “My pottery… well liked? This is great…”

“It's better than your other future isn't it? Sure you lost all of your friends, but you'll make a bunch of new, good friends to replace them with. That definitely beats going to jail for burning down Hinako's apartment, doesn't it?”

Hajime was about to answer Kyoko's question with a confident 'yes’, but she suddenly felt sick to her stomach.

“Jail?” Hajime repeated.

“Yes. Arson is a crime, is it not?” Kyoko turned her attention back to her reflection.

“I thought my crime was murder-suicide.” Hajime reminded her. “You said I tried drowning Hinako in the pool at Kiryu Palace…”

“Well, you said it yourself.” Kyoko said. “Why would Hinako go to the pool when she can't swim? Also… she's banned from there… right?”

“Right… but…” Hajime shook her head. “You tricked me!”

Kyoko turned away from the mirror and smiled at Hajime. “I guess I should apologize for lying, but it's in my nature. I have nothing to apologize for. If anything, I'm sorry you're so fucking stupid.”

“You… you never knew anything about my future, didn't you? Did you make everything up? Did you?”

“Of course I did. I’m an angel, not an esper. I know the past. As for the future, I know as much as you do… unless someone is going to die within 24 hours and they're going to hell.”

“Why would you do that? Do you have any idea what you made me do? Tamami… Hinako… I…”

“Why are you blaming me for the things you did?” Kyoko laughed. “Why is it that humans can never take responsibility for their own actions? I didn't tell you to tell the world Tamami's secret.”

“But you  _ did _ ! You gave me the contact information and everything!” Hajime shouted. 

“Maybe I did… but I have nothing to do with how you treated Hinako. That was all you. And everything that you did… all the pain you put her through…” Kyoko giggled. “We have so much in common!”

“I have nothing in common with you, you demon!” 

Kyoko stopped laughing, and her expression hardened. “Doesn't it kill you? That you have more in common with Satan's illegitimate child than one of your sweet human friends?”

“Stop saying that! I am nothing like you! I would never take advantage of someone at their lowest point!”

“Sure. Tamami would say otherwise. So while I'm here, do you want to hear the real reason why I was expelled from heaven…?” Kyoko asked. The smile on her face was twisted and unsettling. “It's not because of who my father is.”

“Then… why?”

“Because…” Kyoko stared deep into Hajime's eyes. “I tore my best friend's wings off.”

Kyoko took Hajime's silence as a way to continue.

“She came over to me and said she was sorry for causing me so much pain, claiming she never set out to hurt me... I tore her wings off, because it wasn't fair. How was she allowed to reach her dream, and I wasn't? She was so happy… so confident in herself… we were raised the same - but in my case, it was because they pitied me. I was nothing to them… just lowly bastard Kyoko Igarashi…”

“So tell me…” Kyoko continued. “What's the difference between me and you? Ripping an angel's wings off takes them out for months. They need to recover, and depending on the severity, they could die. Just like Hinako could've, when Fumika beat the shit out of her - because you told her to. Why? Because you couldn't stand to see Hinako happy. Of course, Hinako isn't dead, but her life is ruined for the time being. She can't walk and is a little messed up mentally. You know… I don't understand why you freaked out at the hospital. Seeing Miho in a similar state made me so happy.”

“But I can't be happy… because unlike you, I'm not a sociopath!” Hajime shouted. 

“You're right. You're nothing but a weak bitch with an even weaker mentality… isn't that why you're going crazy as we speak?” Kyoko laughed. “I guess that's also a difference between the two of us.”

Hajime shook her head. “You never answered my question. Why? What do you gain from lying like this… and watching me ruin everything…”

Kyoko smiled. “Did you think I would let you be happy in your new life when I didn't have the opportunity to 'start over’ and clean my background? Did you think you could call me a bitch and get away with it?”

“You're super good at holding grudges.” Hajime observed. “Maybe you should get a real hobby… like pottery.”

“I'll take that as a compliment. Why exactly do you hate Ayame again? Surely it's not because you're holding a grudge because of something she said 12 years ago, right? Oh wait…”

When Hajime didn't answer, Kyoko continued. “See, we're exactly the same. Holding grudges and hurting others. For a human, you're pretty cool~”

“No… no way! No!” Hajime shouted. “We have nothing in common… nothing!”

“Seriously? Wake up and smell the roses. We have everything in common. Everything!”

“Fuck you. Get out of my room! Get out!”

Kyoko, thinking this was some sort of joke, smiled and stuck her tongue out at Hajime. Hajime picked up her bedside lamp, pulling it out of the outlet. She threw it at Kyoko, as hard as she could. The sound of glass and porcelain shattering filled the air, and when Hajime opened her eyes, Kyoko was gone. The only thing that stood before her was the mirror, which was now shattered into pieces, and the lamp, which was no longer a lamp.

“Are you okay up there?” Sumi yelled from downstairs.

Hajime ignored her and got onto her knees, determined to get the shattered decor up. However, that determination only lasted for a few minutes, before Hajime dissolved into tears.

As much as Hajime didn't want to admit it, Kyoko was absolutely right - they were exactly the same. 

xxxxx

The next morning, Hajime decided that she could no longer live as she had been living. She had to apologize and come clean about everything… eventually. But for now, she was going to go see Hinako. Crying all night wasn't going to do anything. The next morning, Hajime was back in the hospital. This matter was so urgent that Hajime decided to ignore the puffiness of her face and go out as soon as she woke up. Hinako never said anything bad about her 'morning face’ before, so why would she care now?

Hajime bought another bouquet of hydrangeas and went along on her way. Now she was standing outside of Hinako's room, hoping that whatever happened the last time, wouldn't happen again. 

When Hajime felt ready, she walked in, stopping dead in her tracks once she saw Hinako sitting up in the bed, reading a picture book to her dolls.

“If the glass slipper fits…” Hinako was saying, then she sighed dramatically. “Wouldn't such a shoe hurt? What if Cinderella fell? The shoe would break. But back to the story. If the glass slipper fits…”

_ She seems well enough, if she can read _ .  _ I have nothing to be worried about. I can do this… _ , Hajime thought, then she cleared her throat and walked into view of Hinako, hiding the bottom half of her face with the hydrangeas. 

“Good morning, Hinako.”

Hinako's eyes got bigger as she recognized that voice. “Hajime?” Hinako asked, then she started crying softly to herself. Hajime took that as a bad sign.

“I'm so sorry. If you don't want me here…”

“No! Of course I want you here… I'm just so happy. I thought you were going to be like my mom and the twins… they haven't come yet, but I'll be patient. They'll come when it's safe.”

Hajime nodded, even though she had no idea what Hinako was talking about. “I feel really bad that you're here. I don't like hospitals…”

“I do. I was scared at first, but the nurses are super talkative. We talk about a lot of things… apparently, there's a fashion designer named Hinako Kita. Isn't it crazy? I didn't think my name was so common…”

“Ah… that's you.”

“What do you mean? I can't sew.” Hinako laughed nervously. “I mean, my mom taught me… but I can't do things like that.”

“Yes you can. You were in the fashion club in high school. You made Eugenie's dress. See?” Hajime pointed to Eugenie.

“What are you talking about?” Hinako looked confused. “Fashion club?”

Hajime sighed deeply. Sure she had been  _ strongly against _ Hinako being a part of the fashion club, but seeing Hinako like this was not something she wanted. Did Hajime rob Hinako of her dream? It was likely.

“What's wrong?” Hinako asked, looking worried. “If that was a bad time, let's talk about something else. Like good times. Like… when you tried killing me because you couldn't handle me saying no.”

“What?!” Hajime nearly jumped out of her skin once Hinako's words registered with her. Hinako looked shocked by Hajime's reaction, if not a little frightened.

“All I said was I remembered how you used to read me picture books when we were younger…” Hinako said, frowning. “I liked it… but I didn't realize that you didn't.”

“Oh… oh…” Hajime struggled to get her breath back, feeling embarrassed. “I liked it a lot too. It's just… I must've misheard. Sorry…”

“You must be sleepy. But it's okay. Oh! Are those flowers for me? They're so pretty. Thank you!”

“Yes.” Hajime handed the flowers to Hinako, her face red. Even though there was nothing romantic about this exchange, Hajime's heart thought differently. She blamed the romantic comedies Saya had shown her for this… and the fact that Hajime couldn't just “delete” her feelings towards Hinako.

But Hinako, despite having the wrong idea about many things, and even forgetting some parts of her life, was  _ not _ able to forget about Hajime's feelings about her. She also couldn't forget about Hajime's “confession” or the events that followed. She decided not to say anything about it… for now.

“Guess what we had for dinner last night?” Hinako asked.

“What?”

Hinako started giggling. “Miso cod, bamboo shoots, and rice! I knew it was a sign that you would come… and you came! So what did you have for dinner last night?”

Hajime didn't know what to say - she had yet again skipped dinner, or rather, she was so upset over what happened with Kyoko, she had forgotten to eat. Common sense told her to lie, but Hajime's brain was so foggy that she couldn't think of one.

Luckily, she didn't have to.

“Good morning Hinako.” Saya had walked into the room, and Hajime, who had been squatting on the floor next to Hinako's bed, immediately stood up.

“Hajime?” Saya questioned. 

“I'm about to leave, don't worry.” Hajime said coldly. “And don't worry, I slept well.”

“But you misheard.” Hinako reminded her. “You thought I said something else…”

“No… no…” Hajime shook her head, laughing nervously. “What are you talking about?”

Saya sighed. “Well I'm glad you are here. So is Hinako…”

“Actually… I'm very glad.” Hinako agreed, then she held up her picture book. “Hajime! Elizabeth, Eugenie,  _ and  _ Saya want to see your super good reading skills.”

“I do?” Saya asked.

“Yes. Come on.” Hinako held the book out to Hajime, who slowly took it. Feeling nervous the entire time, Hajime read the whole story, feeling like she was nine again. When she was done, both Hinako and Saya clapped.

“Isn't she great?” Hinako gushed. “She always used to read books to me when I was sad. It made me feel better!”

“Well I see why. Hajime is really good.”

“She doesn't get distracted either! I tried reading it to Elizabeth and Eugenie earlier and I kept getting distracted because a lot of things in this book don't make any damn sense!” Hinako started laughing. “Do you have any idea how problematic a glass slipper would be?”

“It would hurt to walk in.” Saya realized.

“And if you danced too hard on them, they'd break.” Hajime added.

“See? Say Cinderella wore a size six. That means the glass slipper could fit any size six. Anyone who wears a size six could be Cinderella! It doesn't make sense!” The three spent the next two hours commenting on Hinako's observations of logical failures in fairytales. Both Saya and Hajime were surprised by this, since Hinako didn't seem like the type of person to notice such things. But maybe Hinako was smarter than she looked…? Either way, Hajime found herself feeling the best she felt in a long time - despite Hinako's predicament, everything felt like it was supposed to be.

It wasn't until Hinako said that Ayame and Natalia were coming that Hajime decided that it was time to go. 

“I need to meet Sumi soon.” Hajime lied. “I'll see you later!”

“Can you come back tomorrow?” Hinako asked.

“Sure!” Hajime answered, without a second thought.

“Come here. I want to ask you something…” Hinako made a come closer motion with her hands. When Hajime was close enough, she whispered into Hajime's ear, “Can you please bring me cheesecake tomorrow? No one else will because they think it's a bad idea for me to have it while I'm bedridden. Like I care.”

“Of course.” Hajime answered. “I'll get it from your favorite place too.”

“Yay! Hajime is the best!” Hinako then hugged Hajime tightly, and Hajime reluctantly hugged her back. Saya, who had been watching this in mild confusion, just shrugged this illicit exchange off. 

As for Hajime...

As long as she could avoid Ayame and Natalia, she figured that these hospital visits would go over smoothly. If she could do what she could to get back into Hinako's good will, the rest would be sure to follow, right?

Right?

xxxxx

“I feel like I used to be really good at this.” Hinako told Tamami and Saya. The next day, the three were in Hinako's hospital room. Tamami had decided to get Hinako a princess themed paper coloring book and some crayons. The other two were watching as Hinako colored, her excitement turning into frustration and eventually sadness as she was unable to hold a crayon correctly and color inside the lines.

“Don't pressure yourself. I'm sure it'll look good regardless.” Saya told her. “Just take your time…”

“I  _ am  _ taking my time!” Hinako shouted, tearing her current page out. “The longer I stay here, the more I realize that something is wrong with me! I want to be the girl in the pictures that you guys show me! I want to be her… not me… I'm not Hinako right now… I'm someone else.”

“But you are…”

“No. I'm not Hinako. Hinako is normal. She isn't sick. She can remember names and faces. She had a job. She can change her clothes. She can wash up by herself. She can eat without being watched. She can use the bathroom. She can  _ walk _ . If I was Hinako, my mom would've came by now. She's probably upset because she has an invalid for a daughter. I know my dad is upset for that reason… but I thought my mom was different. I guess not… I'm sorry mom…”

“Hinako, this is temporary. And even if you are 'invalid’, we still love you regardless.” Tamami attempted.

Hinako shook her head. “I'm sorry for burdening you guys like this… you guys don't have to come in every day if you don't want to. I appreciate it, but… I feel bad that I can't do anything in return.”

“But you can. All we want is to see you recover. Do your best and live your best life. That's all we want.” Saya said. “Seriously… don't worry about ‘paying us back’, we will be fine.”

“Yes.” Tamami agreed. “Recover and become the princess that you were meant to be.”

That brought a smile to Hinako's face. “Hehehe… Tamami called me a princess.”

Tamami blushed for a minute, but the good feeling was shattered once Hajime walked in, holding a box. 

“Oh my God! You came!” Hinako cheered. 

“Oh no.” Tamami stood up from the chair she was in. “What are you doing here?”

“What do you mean?” Hajime asked back. “Saya told me that I was allowed to come here. If you have a problem with it, you can leave.” She then smiled at Hinako. “I brought your cheesecake.”

“Yay!” Hinako started excitedly clapping as Hajime handed her the small box. “I've been waiting for this!”

“'If you have a problem with it, you can leave.’” Tamami said mockingly. “You know what? I can and I will. I have a job interview to go to… because believe it or not, I have a life outside of posting rude shit on Facebook.”

“Really?” Hajime wasn't in the mood to fight. “Where?”

“I'm going to be the “before” model for a skin lightening cream CF. After that, I will be going to a plastic surgery clinic that all the stars use. My mom recommended it for me - she didn't need it, but I do, since I wasn't born a natural beauty like she was. I'm having a consultation for breast augmentation. When I get them done, I will send you a ton of pictures, since you're  _ so  _ concerned about my bra size.” Tamami answered, glaring at Hajime, who felt like she had gotten punched in the throat. How could she have forgotten about her one status update? 

“Seriously?!” Saya screeched. “Tamami… if that's what the job is… and if you're going to do all of that... I absolutely cannot let you leave this room.”

“No… don't worry.” Tamami looked alarmed by Saya's reaction. “It's nothing like that. Nothing of the sort. I'm too short to be a model, and plastic surgery? I can't afford such things… I can't afford anything, actually. That's why I have a job interview…”

“Then what is it for?” Hajime asked.

“Can you please stop talking to me as if you're my friend?” Tamami asked. 

“Well good luck!” Hinako cheered, despite the bad attitude of the room.

“Thank you.” Tamami grinned. “Oh… is that cheesecake? You should share it with Hajime.”

Hinako, who was feeling very territorial, glared at Tamami for making such a suggestion. As for Hajime, she just shook her head, a grimace on her face.

“Can you grow up? She's trying to be the bigger person here.” Saya snapped.

“Well she's definitely the bigger person.” Tamami snapped, then in a light voice, she sang, “ _ Look at my pretty daughter~! _ ”

“You…” Hajime started, her face reddening. “You saw that?”

“Of course I did. Everyone saw it. It was a public post, you dumb fuck.”

“Uh… Hajime. Please watch over Hinako… she sometimes needs help with eating. As for you…” Saya turned to Tamami, her face dark. “We'll be stepping out for a moment.”

“But my job interview…”

“Shut up.”

Saya dragged Tamami into the bathroom. As soon as they were in there, Saya checked all the stalls. Upon seeing that they were empty, she slapped Tamami so hard, that she fell into the sink.

“What the hell?” Tamami shouted.

“You deserve that! Seriously?! Hajime is trying to make things better between you two and open up communication. She's actually trying… can you stop trolling for five minutes? Or at least take your fight outside of the hospital? Imagine how much stress Hinako and the other patients feel when they hear you trying to start shit. Stop it and think about others. The world is bigger than you, Tamami!”

“The world is bigger than me?” Tamami repeated. “You think I don't know that, when I was raised as Misa Wakita's most worthless possession? I just have to laugh. Why does everyone's feelings matter more than mine? Am I that insignificant? You don't understand why I am not open to forgiving her right now? She singled me out.”

“You outed her.” Saya reminded Tamami. “You're nothing short of an asshole…” 

“She used my secret against me.”

“And so did you. Like being a lesbian is anything to be ashamed of. Tamami, I mean this from the bottom of my heart, but… unless you start seriously reflecting on yourself… you will end up just like your mother. I don't want that for you. So please…”

“So you don't want me to be beautiful, successful and universally loved? You want me to stay ugly and pathetic forever? Get fucked, Saya! Seriously… get fucked!”

Tamami then ran out of the bathroom, leaving Saya with no choice but to follow.

Back in Hinako's room, Hajime had decided to sit on the edge of the bed, feeding Hinako the cheesecake, because Hinako was starting to get messy with it. The last thing Hajime wanted was to touch the cheesecake with her bare hands. 

“Stop!” Hinako exclaimed. “I've had enough for now.”

“Oh … Sorry.” Hajime sighed regretfully. “I'm so tired…”

“So you should go home and sleep.” Hinako suggested.

“I'm not that kind of tired…” Hajime frowned. “I don't know where Saya and Tamami went, but I can't leave you here alone. Especially since…”

“Especially since what?” Hinako smiled. “Because you're the knight to my princess?”

“Noooooooo.” Hajime sighed. “Knights are esteemed individuals… they have to have good character… I'm not.”

“I know I used to say that you had a dirty character, but I didn't really mean it…” Hinako said. “Well, I did mean it. But I only said that because I was jealous. At first because you're so strong… I'm always needing help. Then because of how your life changed…”

“Well… whatever your reason is… you're right.” Hajime reached over and stroked Hinako's hair, her dark eyes filling up with tears. “I'm sorry… I'm sorry I'm such a mess. I'm sorry that you got hurt because of me… I'm sorry I made you like this…”

“You did what?” A voice asked from the door.

Hajime looked over in that direction, only for something shiny and gold to hit her in the eye. As she tried not to be overwhelmed by the stinging sensation, she stared at the item, which was the bracelet that Ayame took from her. Hajime felt like the world was coming to an end as Ayame charged towards her, with Natalia following. No one noticed Tamami and Saya, who were now in the doorway.

“You want to say that again so we all can hear it?” Ayame challenged, pulling Hajime off of the bed and to her feet.

“I… I... didn't mean it like that…” Hajime said slowly.

“You're such a fucking liar.” Natalia swore. “Looks like Miss One Country One Race Fujiwara has some secrets of her own… I thought you said only foreigners were capable of having shitty morals. Why don't you tell us all about Fumika?”

“Fumika?” Hinako repeated. “That's the girl… the girl with the bat… Hajime… do you know her? She made me like this...”

“Not quite.” Natalia snapped. “Hajime did it. Told Fumika to attack you.”

“Hajime…” Hinako repeated, grabbing onto Hajime's wrist. “Is she lying? Is she lying? Please tell me that she's lying… I know you and I had a bad relationship… but you wouldn't go that far, would you?”

“Natalia, I don't think it's right for you to lie…” Saya began. “Hajime is… she's not that type of person.” She turned her attention to Hajime. “You aren't that type of person, right? Right?!”

“You're wrong… I am that type of person…” Hajime said finally. Her voice was low, but then she got louder. “Fumika… I told her to take Hinako's smile away. I told her to make her regret being born. I even offered to pay her…”

Saya gasped loudly, covering her mouth with her hands. Tamami looked smug for whatever reason, Natalia was livid, and Ayame had fallen on her knees.

“No way…” Hinako said, her face reddening. She couldn't handle what she was hearing. “Why go that far? Why?! What did I do to deserve you doing this to me?!”

“I'm sorry. I'm sorry…” Hajime sobbed. She couldn't speak.

“Is that why you were being so nice to me? Because you were feeling guilty?” Hinako frowned. “I don't even care at this point… I hope you're happy, Hajime.”

“I'm not…” Hajime whimpered.

“Why not? You won. You have everything I wanted while taking everything away from me… are you happy?”

“Hinako, don't speak like that…” Saya attempted, even though she herself was shaking from anger. She felt like the biggest idiot on the planet; she was  _ just  _ defending Hajime not even five minutes ago! 

“And you swore she was such a good person…” Tamami gloated. “How does it feel, knowing that the bitch you white knighted so hard is the devil in plain sight? Don't feel too bad, we're all allowed to make mistakes.”

Saya wanted to tell Tamami to shut up, but she was too dumbfounded to say anything. 

“I'm not the devil.” Hajime started.

“But you are. How could you show your face and act innocent? Do you know how much pain you've caused us all? Get out.” Natalia grabbed Hajime by her jacket sleeve. “Your recent behavior was bad but this is inexcusable. You have the audacity to do things like this to your friends? And then apologize like you did something small? What would you have done if Hinako would've died?! Get fuck out!”

“Okay.” Hajime said.

“Okay? Is that all you have to say for yourself?”

“Not so fast.” Ayame stood up. “She can't leave just yet… Tamami, come inside. I want you to hear this.”

“Me?” Tamami asked, her smug expression morphing into a confused one. Regardless, she entered the room. “Okay…”

“Tell her.” Ayame commanded. “Tell her what you did, Hajime.”

Hajime didn't say anything. Sure she wanted to come clean, but not like this. She wished she was literally anywhere else on the planet right now. Ayame's glare was so intense, it could've shattered icebergs into pieces. Hajime couldn't bring herself to look at everyone else. She closed her eyes tightly.

“Oh… but you were so loud and proud about it right before I kicked your ass. Just answer this one question. Did you, or did you not… tell the media about Tamami's relationship with her mother?”

The rest of the girls in the room found themselves gasping at this dramatic turn in events. 

“You know the answer to that question.” Hajime said. “Tamami, I'm sorry.”

“Sorry isn't good enough. That means… everything you said at my house that day… you were lying. All that bullshit about taking the high road was just that… bullshit.” Tamami laughed derisively. “I trusted you… do you know what you put me through…?! Were you lying about how you'd help me if I needed a place to go?” 

“No… no… I really meant it…” Hajime said.

“Okay and I'm Kaede Takagaki. You're full of shit!” Tamami shouted, running out of the room. No one moved to follow her.

“That means… you weren't guessing when you tried to blame me and Natalia for it…” Saya observed. “That was… intentional.”

“It was a calculated attempt to throw us under the bus and to turn Tamami against us. You're truly evil.” Natalia said.

“As expected from Dark Queen Fujiwara~.” Ayame sang. “Anyone who can hold a grudge for 12 years is evil as hell. I'm surprised, but at the same time… not surprised.”

“Hajime, go home.” Hinako told her. “Don't ever come back. Please… let's just forget about each other from now on, okay?”

“I'm sorry for everything.” Hajime apologized yet again, and she began to walk out. Her entire body felt like she it was made of lead. Her stomach felt like it had turned inside out. She felt like she was going to drop dead from all the stress - if she did, her old friends would probably throw a party right there. As Hajime wasn't moving fast enough, Natalia ended up shoving her out of the room. No one objected to this.

With Hajime gone, the atmosphere of the hospital room was heavy. No one knew what to say or do. No one knew where to go from here. But what everyone did know was…  nothing would ever be the same.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ZOINKS... but did anyone think that would go over well? lmao. poor hajime...


	19. XIX

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's a certain part in here... It's by far the most emotionally taxing thing I've written... period. So I strongly advise you not to read this if you're feeling bad/depressed/self destructive/etc in case you end up feeling worse. That's your content warning. Poor Hajime...

XIX

After leaving the hospital, Hajime went home. She had tried doing pottery, but that went just as well as she expected. After getting frustrated, she destroyed everything that she had made so far, throwing bowls, mugs and the like into the wall, pretending they were herself. 

“Worthless! Worthless!” Hajime shouted, before falling on the floor. She wanted to be left alone, but of course, she couldn't even get that courtesy. As Hajime had been sobbing her heart out, Takashi had walked into the room, as a frightened Sumi thought that someone had broken in. But nope, it was Hajime, who had been holding a piece of one of her bowls, sniffling as she observed how sharp it was.

“What on Earth is the matter with you?” Takashi asked.

“Everything… I was hurt today… but I'm not the victim...” Hajime answered. She suddenly felt apologetic when she realized that her father was not moved. “I'm sorry I'm not the daughter you expected.”

“I'm sorry too.” Takashi snapped. “It hasn't been quiet since you came here… and why? You came here to seek out our wealth, and you successfully took advantage of my wife's kindness. But you will not take advantage of me, you gold digger. Get up and stop acting crazy for attention. It isn't working.”

Hajime slowly stood up. “Maybe I'm not acting for attention. Maybe… maybe I actually feel this way. Have you ever thought about that?”

“No child of mine would act like you. It makes me wonder… if you would've turned out like this if the hospital didn't make their mistake. If so… they did a good thing back there.”

“Why can't you act like a father?” Hajime cried. “Our DNA is the same…”

“But you're still a stranger under my roof. You're only my daughter in title. I don't understand why you want me to love you so much… it's not possible. Looking at you… I feel no paternal affection. Now if you will please…”

“What if something happened to me?” Hajime asked. “Would you care then?”

“Of course not. You're nothing but a stranger to me. Now get out of my sight and stop trying to emotionally manipulate me like you did to my wife.”

That was a few hours ago. Now she had been laying in her bed, trying to figure out where to go from here. Her family didn't care for her, and her friends, the family that she chosen, all wanted her dead. 

“Everyone deserves something better than me…” Hajime said slowly. “I'm the worst of the worst… everyone hates me. I hate myself…”

Because she was in the mood to make herself feel even worse, Hajime decided to go read Everyday Saya. What she saw surprised her. Saya had blacked out her profile picture, and the pink girly theme had been replaced with a solid black one. There had only been one update today, and it was different from Saya's usual updates.

Normally, Saya would include emojis, but there were no emojis. There was no picture in the entry either. The post was titled, “If You're Here…”

Hajime decided to read it. The entry was extremely short.

_ I hope that you can find it in your heart to be happy one day. Despite everything… you still deserve happiness… you wouldn't do all that stuff for no reason. You were in pain. Of course you were. Your life has been hard up to this point… that's understandable. Really, it is. I can't hate you for that. Please… if you're reading this… get help. You can't live like this, hurting others to get revenge. For your sake…  _

Hajime dropped her phone, as her hands were shaking that much. It was clear that Saya was talking to her… Hajime felt like dirt. After thinking about it for a while, she left a comment, and then left her room.

xxxxx

Saya had been watching one of her “so bad it's hilarious” romantic comedies when she picked up the phone and saw the notification. Someone had commented on her most recent blog entry! That wasn't special, given that Saya wasn't an unpopular blogger by any means, but what was different was the comment. Most people who commented on “if you're here…” expressed concern about whatever Saya was talking about, and wishing that the situation, whatever it was, ended well. However… this person was different.

Their name was Tougei, Saya noticed. That should've been insignificant, but then she realized that the kanji the person used matched a certain word. 

Ceramics. Saya's heart jumped a bit once she realized that Tougei was Hajime. Normally she ignored comments on her blog, but this one couldn't be ignored. Hajime wrote,

_ “It's been hard up to this point and it'll continue to be hard. You said that I can't live like this… I can't live, period. I'm being suffocated by the darkness. I can't take it anymore. It's like I'm falling deeper and deeper into a well. There's no way out. I've done everything I can but I can't stop falling. My actions, my behavior… I'm sorry for everything. The others will be happy to know that I'm gone. I'm not right… I'm broken past the point of being fixed. I'm sorry for wasting your time and kindness, Saya. But don't worry... I'm leaving and not coming back. _

“Hajime…” Saya said out loud. Thinking back to various things that she saw and heard, she felt like Hajime was going to do something rash… something final. She wasn't sure of what she should do, but she had to think fast. She called Hajime, begging for her to pick up the phone.

“Sayaya?”

Whoever picked up the phone wasn't Hajime. Saya still recognized the voice though.

“Hi Sumi… it's Saya to you.” Saya introduced herself. “Where's Hajime? Is she there? I want to speak to her.”

“Well… you picked a bad time to call… she's not here right now.”

“What?”

“She was here earlier. We tried eating dinner together, which was surprising. I thought she was finally turning around, because she's been so antisocial lately. But Hajime… she didn't smell very good, it was very gross actually. My husband told her to go take a shower. They got into an argument… Hajime went upstairs though.”

“Is she still up there?”

“No… she came downstairs, drenched in water. That smart ass had gotten into the shower with her clothes on. She was just glaring at us, smirking… I felt like I was in The Ring… have you noticed that Hajime has been a little… weird lately? Because…”

“The story! Finish telling me the story!”

“Right… of course, we all started fighting… how dare she ruin the clothes I bought her? Takashi thought she was mocking him. She left after that.”

“Did she say where she went?”

“No… of course not. Hajime keeps to herself. What a strange…”

Saya hung up the phone. Back to square one! The next thing Saya checked was Hajime's Facebook, which had been deactivated. Shit. That left only one option… it was a long shot, but she dialed Hinako's phone number.

“Saya?” Hinako questioned. “I can barely keep my eyes open… these painkillers make me so tired.”

“I want to ask you something about Hajime. It's really important so please take it seriously.”

Hinako yawned. “I'll do my best…”

“Does Hajime go somewhere when she gets really upset? Like a certain place…”

“The park… the park across the street from Asaka High School. That's where we went to school. It was a nice school… even though it got loud at times. There are train tracks right across the street...” Hinako recalled.

“Hajime.” Saya reminded her.

“Oh yeah… she really likes that place… the greenery. She will stare up at the sky until she feels better.”

“Oh my God. Thank you. Thank you so much! Sleep well!”

Saya then hung up the phone, and ran out into the darkness. While Saya had gone to a Catholic girls high school, she knew where Asaka High School was because that was considered her “neighborhood school”.

Twenty five minutes later, Saya was outside of the park, trying to get her breath back as she stared at the locked fence before her. Of course the fence was locked, it was night time! She should've known better. 

Would Hajime jump the fence? Maybe. But as urgent as the situation was, Saya, who was afraid of her feet leaving solid ground, wasn't jumping shit. She decided to walk around the perimeter of the park, trying to find an opening. As she turned the corner, she saw the high school, and the train tracks that Hinako was talking about. 

“Hmm… I would hate to hear that all day long.” Saya mused. “But I guess after a few weeks, you'd get used to it….”

Saya's voice trailed off as she heard the low rumbling of a train off in the distance. She looked in that direction, only to see Hajime standing by the railroad crossing, waiting. Not wanting to startle her, Saya ran over.

“Hajime…” Saya began, grabbing onto Hajime's wrists. However, she couldn't bring herself to say anything as Hajime's skin was ice cold. It was a cold night to begin with, but Hajime wasn't wearing a jacket - just a pair of shorts and a shirt. Just as Sumi had said, Hajime's hair and clothes were wet, and she was shivering.

Hajime snatched her hands away from Saya, pushing her to the ground. Saya got up, noticing that there was now blood on her hands. Then she noticed Hajime's wrists, which made Saya flinch.

“Hajime… what did you do you to yourself?”

“I'm only acting like this for attention, because I'm a gold-digging attention whore.” Hajime muttered. “Don't be alarmed. I'm already a piece of shit as it is. Go home.”

“No… no. I can't go home. Your father is wrong. You aren't acting like this for attention, you're really hurting. It's really cold too…” Saya took her jacket off and handed it to her. “Put this on, and let's go somewhere warm, like my house. We can talk there. Please…”

“Why can't you mind your business this once?” Hajime asked, throwing the jacket back at Saya, hitting her in the face. “Everyone wants this. I want this. Hinako…” Hajime started sobbing. “How can I go on, knowing that I'm responsible for what happened to her? I'm supposed to be her best friend, but I hurt her like that! Natalia has always been so nice to me but I attacked her like I did. Tamami is homeless now because of me! And Ayame… Ayame… she's been trying to make things right between us for the longest time but I was too stupid to see it…”

“That's all very true, but you don't have to let this define you…”

“But it will define me. Hinako may never be able to walk again. Who's going to take care of her if she is unable to? She'll probably need a caretaker if she doesn't get placed into a home. I did that to someone who I  _ loved _ . She doesn't have any family, and everyone wants her dead because of who her father is. What's going to happen if Natalia has to go back to Brazil, or if Ayame's career becomes more demanding? She'll be alone… she's not strong…”

“But she won't be alone. I'm still here. But... Hinako will recover. She's not weak. You're not weak. None of us are. Hinako may need help for now but she has determination… she was determined to pay that money back… she's still the same girl, despite everything. Just like you. So please…”

“I can't believe that…” Hajime shook her head. “Well… you're right. I am the same girl. I've always been pathetic like this! The only difference is now, I can't hide it anymore… I don't deserve anything! I'm a bad person who shouldn't be allowed to live. I'm a bad person who no one wants to see live… your friends will be so happy to hear the news…”

“Hajime! Don't! You're wrong!” Saya grabbed onto Hajime's arm, “Please! Listen to me! You don't want to die. No one wants you to die! I don't want you to die! The others may be mad at you right now, but they don't want you dead! They'll be devastated… if you don't care about how I feel, think about how Hinako would feel!”

“Only because they couldn't kill me themselves. Hinako? I bet she would like to throw me onto these tracks right now.”

“She wouldn't. No one would. You have your entire life ahead of you. Think of things you like… pottery, miso cod, swimming... think of things that make you happy, and all the things you accomplished, like coming first place in school art shows for ten years. Or how you worked that hard ass job with Yuzu for a year… not everyone can do that! Remember how much fun we had watching those movies. Remember our trip to the art museum. Remember things you lived for…”

“I lived for my friends… because that's all I had. But I still fucked that up! I fuck everything up!” Hajime shouted, her face burgundy. She had been crying so hard that her raw voice gave Saya chills. “I don't deserve anything! Let me go! Let me die! Why won't you let me go? Why?!”

“Because… because I care about you too much to let you go! Please…” by now Saya was sobbing and Hajime pulled her arm away, shoving Saya to the ground. The train had gotten closer now, and Hajime, determined to end it all, ran under the railroad crossing gate. 

Saya, feeling very helpless, just shut her eyes and covered her ears, hoping that this was all some kind of nightmare. 

Maybe it was. First Yoshino and now Hajime? How could two people she cared about so deeply die? Did the heavens have it out for her?

That's it, the heavens!

Remembering her time at high school, Saya uncovered her ears and started praying to however was listening. She just wanted someone… something to stop Hajime. Anything!

When everything quieted down, Saya opened her eyes. She didn't know what she was expecting, but she felt massive relief when she saw Hajime still standing on the side of the track, her hands on her heart. Saya got off of the ground and ran towards her friend, pulling her away from the track. Then, without saying anything else, she just hugged her tightly.

“Why did she…” Hajime asked. Her voice was weak and she seemed disoriented. 

“Who is she?” Saya asked. “Um… let's talk at my house… you're freezi-”

But before Saya could finish her sentence, Hajime collapsed onto the ground. 

“Hajime!”

xxxxx

When Hajime opened her eyes, all she saw was white. Where was she? She was surrounded by white space and nothing else. Did she die? Hajime tried to remember what had happened at the railroad crossing. She remembered yelling at Saya, pushing Saya to the ground, and then running towards the train. That should've been the end of it, right?

But it wasn't. Just as Hajime was about to run out, she looked up and saw another girl standing on the track - she had bobbed black hair and wore a white knit hat. Her brown eyes were hardened and her mouth was shut tightly as she stared at Hajime, who couldn't move.

It was as if time stopped for Hajime and Hajime only. She could hear Saya in the background, and she could see the train speeding by. Whatever happened next… Hajime had no idea. 

She wasn't sure where she was, but it didn't match a description of heaven or hell. Was she in limbo? Was her fate being decided? Hajime wasn't even sure if she was still alive. It was then that the gravity of the situation hit her.

“I'm so sorry… please forgive me Saya…” Hajime fell to her knees and started sobbing, but that ceased as someone held a box of tissues out towards her.

Hajime slowly looked up… to see that it was the mysterious black haired girl. Her expression seemed way softer than it was at the track.

“Please take as many as you need.” the girl said. Her voice was soft and calming. “You're probably scared, aren't you?”

Hajime wiped her tears. “Of course I am... I… I don't know what is happening… where am I? How did I end up here when I was at my old school? Am I alive? Or…”

“You're still alive. You're in the hospital right now, sleeping. You are neither in heaven or in hell. This is a dream, so don't worry.”

“But what happened?”

“I had to stop you… and when I stop time for someone like that… it sucks both my energy and the person's. You passed out after that… and so did I. I apologize for the confusion.”

“You… you stopped time just to keep me alive? Why?” Hajime shook her head. “No… I think a better question is… who are you?”

“My name is Miho.” the girl answered. “Miho Kohinata. I'm an angel…”

“Mi… Miho?” Hajime repeated. Remembering what Kyoko said, she got chills. “If you're the angel of death… why did you save me?”

“First, it wasn't your time to go. Second… do you know where you would've ended up if I didn't? I know you are acquainted with Kyoko. She was waiting for you. I had to stop it… I couldn't give her the satisfaction…”

“You shouldn't have.” Hajime shook her head. “Kyoko and I are exactly the same…”

“Not exactly.” Miho shook her head. “Yes… both of you may have a inferiority complex. Both of you may have hurt people who you were close to because of it … but there's a huge difference. You told the truth and came clean about your sins. You have the desire to make things better, which I believe that you can. As for Kyoko…” 

“What about her?”

“She has no remorse for what she did to me… or what she does to others. She abuses her powers to manipulate vulnerable people into doing things that will get them sent to hell… like hurting people, or even murder. When you get there, she'll personally welcome you… as her servant. And then it's just a matter of how long you last before she psychologically or physically breaks you.”

“I think I remember her saying that she broke her last servant?”

“Yes… Riamu is done for… she's a vegetable now…” Miho sighed. “Kyoko is half… neither one of her parents wanted her because they were ashamed of having a child that was from the 'other side’. Her father doesn't acknowledge her. Her mother gave her to the elders and then disappeared. A lot of the elders didn't know what to do with her. But angels… we thrive on kindness. They raised her as an angel… as my cousin. It worked until our coming of age ceremony… then Kyoko's background came to light in an unfortunate way. She hasn't been the same since…” 

Miho continued. “I'm getting off topic. The point is, when I'm not escorting people and animals into heaven, I try to stop people from falling into Kyoko's manipulation. Because no matter what she says… you're nothing like her. I can just tell. Take it from me, someone who knows her personally…”

“I guess I can trust you…” Hajime sighed. “But my friends… what should I do about them? Will they ever forgive me?”

“I can't answer that, as I'm not a psychic. But what I can tell you is that your friend… Saya… is willing to forgive you. She'll just need some time to get over the shock of your confessions. Your other friends will most likely be similar… remember. Forgiveness is not something that can be rushed. It is not something that can be bought either. This kind of thing takes time, and it's not guaranteed either. Be patient.”

“Thank you Miho…”

“Ah yes. One last thing before I go.”

“Hmm?”

Miho handed Hajime a pearl ring and matching earrings. “Wear these… one or the other is fine. You don't need both, but you can wear both if you like.”

“Why?”

‘You're going to need them. Trust me.” Miho sighed. “As you know, Kyoko doesn't like being wronged…”

“So she won't leave me alone?”

“Oh she will. But I just don't understand… why willingly follow a demon…?”

Hajime frowned. “She made it seem like she knew my future. My past… my life up to that point had been hard. The idea of having the same kind of future scared me… so I thought if I took her advice...”

Miho shook her head and placed her hands onto Hajime's shoulders. “And that's how she gets you.” she said gently. “I can't blame you for this, as you were the victim… but… you need to have confidence in yourself. Only you can change your future!”

“But how can I reach that point?”

“That's something that you work on day by day. There is no overnight solution, and it's a process… even angels struggle with such feelings.”

“I see…” Hajime then motioned towards the pearls. “So what will these do?”

“They will keep Kyoko away from you as long as you're wearing it. Pearls kill demons, but since Kyoko is half, it'll just weaken her. But I know from personal experience that pearls make her seriously ill… so she'll stay away regardless.”

Hajime put the ring on her finger and then smiled at Miho. “Thank you so much…”

“Of course. Now please… for my sake and yours, please live on and make things right.”

xxxxx

Hajime's eyes fluttered open, and she was still feeling slightly confused. She was expecting to wake up in her bedroom, but all it took was seeing the harsh lighting for her to realize that she was in the hospital. It was just like Miho had said. 

And speaking of Miho, her dream wasn't a dream… even though the events of last night before surely felt like one. But it wasn't - Hajime's wrists were bandaged up and she wore a pearl ring on her finger. The pearl earrings were in her ears too.

“You're awake.”

Hajime sat up, only to see Saya sitting besides her. The glassiness of her eyes made Hajime's heart hurt. 

“Saya… I'm really sorry… I…”

“Don't apologize. I'm just glad that you're still here.”

“How did I end up in the hospital?”

“You passed out… because of dehydration and exhaustion and apparently, you're anemic. You have a bit of a fever too… since it was so cold.” Saya explained. “I went home last night, because I wanted to let you rest. But now that you're awake…”

“Did Sumi and Takashi come by? Do they even know I'm here?” Hajime asked.

Saya sighed. “I told them this morning… I went by your house before coming here… I don't know if I should tell you this… but Sumi was really friendly until I told her what happened. Then she got upset.”

_ Maybe I was wrong about her _ , Hajime thought.

Saya continued, “She kept saying she was embarrassed, which confused me, why would she be embarrassed? As for Takashi, he kicked me out, saying he doesn't care about whatever stunt you and I are trying to pull. I guess he thought we were playing a joke? What an asshat. I'm sorry.”

“That sounds  _ just _ like them.” Hajime sighed. “I can't even bring myself to be upset. It's just as you said… they're unfit to be parents… maybe I was lucky that the hospital made a mistake… who knows how I would've turned out if I was raised by them…”

“That's enough about that. I made you something, since you haven't eaten in a while…”

“Food?” Hajime thought back to when Saya almost burned her house down. “Saya, you didn't have to…”

“Don't worry! My mom helped me this time.” she handed Hajime a box, tied with a cloth. Hajime slowly opened it, to see that it was miso cod, bamboo shoots and rice. Her heart began to hurt - she didn't deserve this!

“Thank you Saya… I really appreciate it, but I can't accept this…”

“What do you mean, you can't accept it?”

Hajime sighed. “How can I accept it after everything I've done… after how I made you worry like that… I don't know how it escalated… but I shouldn't be surprised… it was only a matter of time. I guess I'm crazy.”

“Don’t say that. You are not crazy.” Saya told her. 

“But something is wrong with me, and how I think…” Hajime sighed. “All my life… I thought I deserved nothing. Before Hinako came to the orphanage, I was the youngest. The nuns and the older girls would dote on me and give me things… especially since I'd been there as an infant. I was the favorite, but I just didn't feel right. It'd give me this feeling of sadness, that they're wasting their time and affection on me… that's why I was so glad when Hinako showed up. I got to fade in the background.”

“But those feelings never went away.”

“Of course not. Every year for our birthdays and certain holidays we'd get a special allowance. We'd get a weekly allowance too. The nuns noticed I never actually spent money on myself… they thought I was saving it but I was giving my money to Hinako. In fact… every time I got something nice, I would give it to her.”

“Why?”

Hajime sighed. “Because I felt like she deserved it more than I did, but I feel this way about everyone. I just don't feel comfortable accepting nice things happening to me. I think… I think that's something I need to work on. That's ruining my life… the reason why I acted out so badly was because I was afraid… I was afraid that I'd continue to live a miserable life, so I started doing things in desperation.”

“Yes… I remember you saying that in the park that day. That you are tired of life fucking you around…”

“But I was wrong. It's not life fucking me around… it's this complex I have against myself. How it can make me do things that make me so sick with stress that I end up not sleeping for days. How it can make me hurt people who I care about… it's not an excuse, but an explanation. I need to do my best to fix things. I need to see everyone…”

“Not right now, I hope.” Saya frowned, then she whispered. “You literally can't leave this room… not until the doctors feel you're mentally stable. When it passes you get the choice to go home and do nothing… or you can keep coming back for outpatient therapy.”

Hajime tried not to appear fazed by this information. “How do you know all of this?”

Saya laughed nervously. “Personal experience. I told Hinako this… I dropped out of high school in my 3rd year, and because of that, I lost my college acceptance. I felt like a failure, and I felt so alone. My depression got so bad that I did something I don't want to remember. Why did all of this happen? Because my best friend at the time passed away suddenly from an illness. It was very unexpected, because she seemed healthy. It had nothing to do with me, but I felt responsible, because… her situation reminds me a little of Tamami's.”

“Huh?”

“Of course, Yoshino was way nicer, but her parents were politicians and they were more concerned about their careers than her. They weren't outright abusive towards her, but they neglected her to the point that she died alone…” Saya's voice trailed off. “I'm just so happy that I didn't have to go through that again… losing a best friend.”

“I'm glad too. I'm really sorry.” Hajime apologized. “But like I said… I'm going to do my best to fix things… that means… as scary as it is… I'm going to start outpatient therapy. I need to heal myself. That's the first step. It doesn't matter if everyone forgives me, if I can't forgive myself.”

“You're absolutely right about that.” Saya said, smiling. “Oh yeah! You should try the food, before it gets cold. I worked really hard on it.”

“Okay…” all the confidence that Hajime had a few moments ago had been gone. But still, she tried some of the fish, which surprisingly, wasn't that bad.

“How is it? It's good right?” Saya asked.

“...It's a step in the right direction.” Hajime answered. “But it definitely beats hospital food. Thank you! I'm so glad I could inspire your improvement!”

“I'm going to start a cooking series on Everyday Saya, just wait!” Saya and Hajime found this funny and started giggling, until Hajime remembered something.

“Speaking of improvement… how did Tamami's job interview go?”

“I'll ask Ayame. She should be downstairs.”

“Downstairs…?” 

“Oh right. Don't you know what hospital you're staying in?”

xxxxx

Two floors under Hajime, Ayame and Natalia were standing outside of Hinako's room, waiting. Hinako wasn't actually in the room - as it was a nice day, Hinako managed to talk one of the nurses into taking her outside. 

The only issue was, Hinako had forgotten that Ayame and Natalia were coming to visit. So as Hinako and the nurse were going down the elevator, Ayame and Natalia were going up. 

It wasn't a big deal, although Ayame and Natalia were standing in silence - and not the good kind.

“What do you think about Hajime?” Natalia asked finally. She figured that now was her chance. “I know you and Tamami talked about her last night…”

Ayame shrugged. “Surprisingly, Tamami didn't say much. I don't think about Hajime… I haven't been thinking about her for years… looks like I was ahead of the curve on that one.”

“I wish I had your foresight.” Natalia sighed.

“Hey guys.”

The conversation was interrupted as Saya had walked over to them. Both Natalia and Ayame were shocked - they weren't expecting to see Saya here!

“Oh hey Saya. What brings you here?” Natalia asked. “You didn't say you were coming…”

“Sorry… I had a wild night. It was bad…”

“Yikes. Well Hinako isn't here, which is why we're in the hallway. Get comfortable.” Ayame told her.

“I can't. Hajime is upstairs, I only wanted to come here to ask you guys if you heard anything about Tamami's job interview? It was yesterday.”

“Job interview?” Ayame repeated. “Tamami didn't have an interview yesterday…”

“Hold on, so she lied?” Saya inferred.

“No…  _ you  _ hold on.” Natalia spoke up. “Did you say Hajime is upstairs? What's she doing there? Also… were you visiting her?”

“She got sick. Also… her parents don't want anything to do with her so I'm acting as her relative. Just as you were doing for Hinako.”

“Sick with what?” 

“Guilt.” Ayame and Natalia started giggling.

“She had a mental breakdown last night, and is currently on suicide watch.” Saya's words slipped, and Ayame and Natalia stopped laughing. They both looked worried.

“Hajime… as in Hajime Fujiwara?” Natalia asked. “No… there's no way.”

“Yeah… Hajime is… she keeps everything to herself... “ Ayame said. 

“Is she okay?” Natalia asked. 

“She will be fine. She just won't be able to leave here for the next 72 hours…” Saya sighed deeply. 

“I'm very angry with her right now, but… geez. I don't want her dead. I never wanted her dead.”

“Same here…” Ayame agreed. “I don't know what happened and Hajime probably wouldn't want you to tell us the details but I'm glad that you were there.”

“You can thank Hinako for that.” Saya said. “She was high on painkillers but was still able to help me.”

“She said she had a dream where you called her and asked her about Hajime.” Natalia said. “Guess that wasn't a dream…”

“Speaking of Hinako… and Tamami, I guess… are you going to tell them?” Ayame asked.

“We should let Hajime tell Hinako… like I didn't mean to tell you guys, but it just slipped out.” Saya explained. “As for Tamami she'll probably put it on Facebook for everyone to see. I'd rather stick my hand into a blender, so I'm not telling her anything.”

“Good idea.” Natalia and Ayame said in unison. 

“But her job interview?” Saya asked. “Why'd she lie?”

“Who knows honestly… I'd say we ask her, but I don't know. She's been acting a little different lately.” Ayame noticed. “Like we all know Tamami cannot keep a secret to save her life, but she's been so secretive lately. She'll go out all day… but she doesn't have a job.”

“Not true. She kept her mother a secret.” Natalia reminded her.

“That's different.” Saya said. “Her mother threatened her to stay quiet, and Tamami actually respects her for whatever reason. But if Tamami doesn't respect you as a person?”

“That's true. Look at what she did to Hajime. Sure Hinako told her the information, but she didn't tell Tamami to post it. That was all Tamami… she's trash.”

“Of course it was.” Ayame sighed. “I love her but… these days…? Not so much. If it weren't for everything with her mother, I'd stop talking to her.”

“Yeah, honestly. She's so annoying and I'm starting to lose patience for her. Maybe when everything clears up… we should distance ourselves?” Natalia suggested.

“Good idea. She's such a headache.” Saya sighed. “Knowing her, she'd probably start celebrating if we told her about Hajime, especially since Hajime really had it out for her. Let's keep this to ourselves for now.”

“Good idea.”

The three kept talking, although the conversation left Hajime - they were now talking about Ayame's show. They kept at it until Hinako finally showed up with a nurse.

“Hi everyone!” Hinako greeted. 

“Hi Hinako! Um… where were you?”

As greetings were exchanged, the mood was light, which everyone found a welcome change. Unfortunately for them, they didn't realize that Tamami was standing around the corner.

xxxxx

On her second day in the hospital, Hajime woke up to something that gave her chills. The room had been devoid of any flowers, which was expected. After all, everyone seemed to hate her - except for Saya.

But Hajime didn't mind. She didn't feel like talking to anyone, as she was still trying to process what she did. A nurse  _ did  _ bring Hajime the latest issue of Ceramics Monthly - but despite Hajime asking for it, she still felt like she didn't deserve it.

_ Why can't I be normal?,  _ Hajime asked herself as she closed the magazine. She then fell asleep… and woke up to see that she now had a bouquet of chrysanthemums. 

Chrysanthemums, the flower associated with death and funerals. Why would someone send those to her, in light of everything that happened? Who would do such a thing?

She got up and observed the flowers. There was no note or name attached.

“Are you okay?” a nurse had walked in, as she had noticed that Hajime had gotten out of the bed.

“Oh yeah, I'm fine…” Hajime lied. “Do you know who bought me these?”

“A girl. She was wearing a sapphire necklace… I should've paid more attention, but I was too surprised by the necklace…”

“Okay. You can take these and throw them away.” Hajime handed the flowers to the nurse. 

“But…”

“Please.” 

The nurse took the flowers and Hajime got back into her bed, thinking. It wasn't hard to figure out, but she only thought of two people who regularly wore jewelry - Sumi and Ayame. Out of those two, Ayame would be the one most likely to do such a thing, Hajime figured. She felt saddened at the idea of Ayame being happy over her current situation.

_ I deserve this happening to me,  _ Hajime thought, but then she shook her head.  _ No. I can't let this change everything. I'm in the wrong, yes, but I deserve to be treated with decency… _

“Good morning Hajime.” a woman had walked in, interrupting Hajime's thoughts. She appeared to be friendly, and judging by her professional clothing, not a nurse.

“Good morning… who are you?”

“My name is Miyu Mifune. I'm a therapist here… and I saw you wanted to seek outpatient therapy? I wanted to ask you some questions, so I can help you better.”

“Okay. Well you know why I'm here… because I can't control my feelings like a normal person, and because of that, I almost died.”

“Don't be so hard on yourself.” Miyu advised. “You're here, and you're seeking help, which is the road less travelled. It's a better road than the other option… not many people seek help after incidents like this. May I ask why you chose to be different?”

“Why? Because I want to have a better future.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A rainbow always follows the storm... 
> 
> Why do I always write shitty parents lol koichi and arisa (rip) are the only good ones... I guess I could redact the spoiler in the note of chapter 17. At least megumi and souichiro (and aiko, I guess) had the decency to visit yuki in the hospital... while sumi and takashit, well you read the chapter! 
> 
> on a lighter note - the notorious miho finally shows up, for 5 seconds, but she still showed up! I think this is ending with 22 chapters so the end is near 🤔👀


	20. XX

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The party never ends in ATG-land

XX

As the days went on, the temperatures got colder. The nights grew longer, as winter was approaching. Normally, the thought depressed Hajime, who was not a fan. The period between November 1st to March 31st usually depressed her. But for Hajime’s 20th December, she found herself feeling rather content.

Things had changed since she had gotten discharged from the hospital - Sumi and Takashi still did not talk to her, but Hajime saw that coming from a mile away. It was unsurprising.

But what was surprising was how  _ different  _ she felt, compared to two months ago. Two months ago, Hajime felt like she was trapped - she felt hopeless. Despite all that talk about wanting to create a better future, Hajime found that she oversimplified everything. The first meeting with Miyu went badly - Hajime didn’t like how Miyu was asking her questions, so she gave flippant responses.

“Have you ever been a relationship before?” Miyu asked, trying to get a sense of Hajime's background.

“Do I look like I’ve ever been in a relationship before?” Hajime snapped, and Miyu placed her notepad down on the table.

“You said you wanted to have a better future, did you not?” Miyu asked, frowning. “Whether our relationship lasts for one session, or for many more, what I can tell you is that if you truly wanted a better future, you would talk to others with respect. I think we’re out of time for today. I will see you out…”

Hajime felt attacked at first, but after thinking it over, she realized that Miyu had a point. The next session started with Hajime apologizing, and ended with Hajime writing her answers out - when it came to certain things, Hajime was better with writing than speaking. The two met twice a week, and by the eighth session, Hajime felt less icy towards Miyu. 

Miyu had encouraged Hajime to write letters to her past self, and she told Hajime to channel her negative feelings into her pottery. But the most helpful thing, Hajime found, was the idea of positive affirmation notes. 

She’d stick them to the mirrors in her room, her closet and her bathroom and read them every time she saw one. Hajime felt foolish at first, but soon she slowly found herself believing that she was enough, that she was a likable person, and that she deserved good things happening to her. Hajime found herself sleeping normally and not feeling as self destructive as she did before - even though the urge was still there..

As for today’s session…

“Christmas is coming up, and I’m not looking forward to it.” Hajime told Miyu. She had been nervous about bringing this up, as Miyu seemed to be a fan of the holiday.

“Do you normally look not forward to it?”

“I usually don’t care about it, but so many things have changed between this year and last year… I lived alone, so I decided to surprise Hinako, who was still at the orphanage. We exchanged gifts and went ice skating. Turns out that both of us can’t skate, so that lasted for thirty minutes at the most. After that we went to a cafe. But now… I haven’t seen Hinako since that day… I don’t even know how she’s doing. I still have her number, but…”

“Are you afraid?”

Hajime nodded slowly. “She’s… her state was bad the last time I saw her. I feel like… if the roles were reversed, I’d hate her for doing that to me.”

“A lot can change in two months.” Miyu said. “At the least, you can ask her how she is doing. That’s a good start, you think? But what about Saya?”

“Saya?” Hajime smiled. “I’m going to her house after we get done here.”

“Have you considered spending the holiday with her family? You tell me good things about them all the time.”

“I do, but I don’t want to ruin their holiday… Takashi and Sumi will probably do something special without me. I'll just stay home alone and sleep all day.”.

“You’re doing it again.” Miyu gently reminded her. “Remember what we said about self-sabotage…”

“I know, I know…”

“Ask. Don’t assume! You never know.”

“Okay. Thank you Miyu… I’ll do my best.”

“I believe in you! I’ll see you next week. Have a good weekend!”

“You too!”

xxxxx

“Today in school, we were making ornaments in art class. I decided to make you this!”

Hajime wasn't the only person that had been making changes over the last two months. Hinako's legs had healed and she was allowed to go home. But first, Hinako needed to be retaught how to do a lot of things, from holding utensils to how to write. While those things were frustrating, nothing came close to relearning how to walk. The process was painful and Hinako felt helpless and ashamed - luckily, the physical therapists were patient, even despite Hinako's incessant crying. At one point Hinako wanted to give up, but she was glad she didn't. The day she was able to walk in the hospital garden without any form of assistance, Hinako could not stop sobbing. She was so happy!

Two months later, Hinako was finally able to leave the hospital, but at what cost? The first week Hinako found herself going hungry because all the food in her apartment had gone bad. She had tried to go to the store, but had gotten lost and didn't return back home until the middle of the night. She also found herself forgetting about her job, and the medication that she was supposed to be taking. It wasn't until Hinako passed out that she realized that she needed help. So she called Natalia.

After confessing to Natalia, she got the idea of hiring a personal support worker to bring Hinako groceries and checking up on her two or three times a week. Hinako was a little salty over this at first - because she  _ did  _ want to go back to living independently, but everything changed once Hinako actually met her. The support worker's name was Minami Nitta - who Hinako befriended immediately. She even helped Hinako decorate for Christmas!

As for her job, Momo was forgiving. She accommodated Hinako's needs by allowing her to use a chair at the register. Hinako found this embarrassing, until Noriko remarked that it looked like she was a princess sitting on a throne. Of course, Hinako enjoyed hearing that. Serika had gotten the idea of writing out Hinako's daily routine and giving it to her. Hinako placed this list on the mirror in her room, and found herself looking at it with decreasing frequency.

Currently, Hinako was trying to teach herself how to sew again - it was slowly coming back to her. During the second half of Hinako's hospital stay, she had started to remember parts of her life, including who her parents were, what happened to them, and the 50 billion yen debt she had. At first, Hinako had been disheartened to learn that her mom and the twins weren't coming back, but Hinako's sadness turned to relief once she realized that they were in a safe place, free from her father. Keeping them in her heart, Hinako decided to do the best that she could. She also seriously believed that her mom was the reason why she recovered relatively quickly - she was looking out for her daughter from above.

As for today, Hinako had been trying to make a dress for Elizabeth, which was proving to be frustrating. It was of her understanding that she used to be good at sewing, but things were different now. Hinako needed to relearn everything, but that wasn't going to stop her.

She couldn't - Hinako  _ still _ wanted to be a designer, and most importantly, she had a debt to pay. After messing up a stitch yet again, Hinako reassured herself that she could do it, and started over.

But this time, she had been interrupted by Serika and Noriko, who had decided to visit. The two had made Christmas ornaments in art class, out of clay. Noriko made Hinako a donut, and Serika made Hinako a high heel, which had been painted sky blue.

“How do you like it?” Serika asked. “I made you a glass slipper, because Cinderella!”

“I love it. Thank you so much.” Hinako walked over to her tree and placed the donut and the glass slipper next to each other. “Minami and I made cookies yesterday! Would you like to try some?”

“Sure!” Serika answered, and Hinako walked into the kitchen, humming a Christmas song.

“Why do you keep calling it a glass slipper?” Noriko asked Serika. 

“Because that's what it is?” Serika answered, like the answer was obvious.

“But it's not a glass slipper. It's a  _ ceramic  _ slipper.”

“But it's not a donut. It's a  _ ceramic _ ring.” Serika said mockingly. 

In the kitchen, Hinako paused as she overheard Serika and Noriko's conversation. The mention of ceramics was all Hinako needed to think about Hajime. 

It was hard  _ not  _ to think about Hajime. Hinako had gone two months without seeing or hearing from her, and Hinako couldn't help but to wonder what she was going to do for Christmas. A small part wanted to ask her to come over, but Hinako felt like Hajime wouldn't agree to it. Plus, Hinako was still working on letting go of her resentment. Of course, she felt some resentment towards Hajime, but surprisingly, most of the resentment was towards  _ herself _ .

“She's probably going on a trip with her rich family.” Hinako muttered. She was about to take the cookies to the middle schoolers, but stopped when she saw that her phone was ringing.

Speak of the devil, it was Hajime!

Hinako wasn't sure of what to do. She decided to let the phone ring, and left the room. After all, Hinako couldn't be rude to her guests.

A few hours later, Noriko and Serika had left, and Hinako was home alone. She was about to go back to sewing, but stopped once she saw that she had a new voicemail. 

Thinking it was from Minami, Hinako decided to listen.

_ It's been a while, hasn't it? I know you really like this time of year, so I decided to call you to say hi. We haven't spoken since that day in the hospital, but I really hope you are doing better these days… I am doing better too. The last two months have been difficult, but I'm liking the result… I'm working to be a better Hajime. Um… I really don't know what to say, but I hope you have a good day. Bye! _

Hinako listened to Hajime's message twice before saving it. What did Hajime mean by she was working to be better? Hinako didn't know, but what she did know was that Hajime sounded better than what Hinako remembered. She sounded happier, which made Hinako feel good, considering how worried Hinako was about Hajime at one point.

Unfortunately, she didn't know how to respond, so she just sent Hajime a yellow heart emoji, and then went back to sewing, thinking to herself.

Could the two end up as friends again?

xxxxx

“She sent me a heart emoji.” Hajime announced. The next morning, Hajime had woken up at Saya's house. Hajime usually spent the night over there, as she found the atmosphere to be way better. Saya's parents, Ayumi and Toru, were not only kind towards Saya, but to Hajime as well - which Hajime still needed to get used to.

As Hajime didn't look at her phone all night, she was just seeing Hinako's response as she was waking up. Even though it was five am, Hajime wanted to scream. A few hours later, Hajime was now sitting on Saya's bed, as Saya had finally woken up. As soon as Saya texted Hajime that she was awake, Hajime ran out of the guest room and into Saya's - this was a very important situation!

“Who sent you a heart? Hinako?”

“Yes! I'm so surprised… I wasn't expecting a response from her at all.” Hajime admitted. “Not because she blocked me or anything, but… I was thinking she wasn't in the state to use her phone.”

“Ah… you'd be surprised. Hinako isn't in the hospital anymore. She's been home for a while…” Saya told her. “I haven't gotten the chance to see her, but Natalia said she's doing well.”

“I wonder if she is still living alone.”

“Right… Hinako is relatively independent now. Natalia said that a girl comes around two or three times a week to check on her, but besides that? She's still holding it down at the fabric shop. She's trying to pay off that debt too… all 50 billion yen of it. Geez… I wasn't kidding about her being determined. That's a lot of work, especially for someone who is _ still _ recovering.”

Hajime sighed nervously. “I guess I can tell you the truth about the 50 billion yen… I inflated the number. Hinako only really owes 5 million yen to those families.”

“No way… wow. Why would you do that?”

“Because I felt…” Hajime suddenly felt embarrassed to admit this. “I felt like Hinako was getting off easy.”

“Well… after everything that happened to her, I'm inclined to disagree.” Saya frowned. “But on the bright side, I'm sure Hinako will be happy to hear this…”

“Yeah… I know all about that feeling.” Hajime sighed. “I do not miss those days.”

“I can imagine…” Saya picked up her phone and started to scroll through it, and Hajime laid down across the bed. She was trying to think about the best way to approach the subject of Christmas, but decided to just ask.

“Hey Saya.”

“What is it?”

“As you know… Christmas is coming up and I was wondering if I could…” Hajime's voice trailed off. Her fear of rejection had gotten to her and now she felt foolish - she could barely finish her sentence.

“What? Do you want to spend it here?” Saya guessed. 

“Yes…”

“Hm…” Saya's expression became unreadable. “I'm not sure…”

“I see. I get it. It's a family holiday, and I'm not a part of your family.”

“No… it's not that.” Saya shook her head.

“Oh wait. Do you guys even celebrate Christmas?”

“Yes… but…” Saya sighed. “How do I say this…”

“It's okay.” Hajime smiled at her. “I understand. I'm sorry for trying to intrude…”

Saya's stomach had started to hurt. She needed a way out of this conversation, so she looked down at her phone, hoping for a new message. Surely enough, Ayame had  _ just  _ texted her, which was a surprise in itself. Over the last two months, it felt as if the group had shrunk down to just Saya and Natalia, with Hinako doing her best to fit in, once she started feeling better. Tamami had moved out of Ayame's house and ghosted on them, while Ayame started distancing herself from everyone. Saya told herself that she was doing this to because her career had gotten more demanding, but with each and every passing day, Saya felt like Ayame wasn't going to come back.

All she said was “...” as well as a link to an article on Page Six, which was a well known entertainment news site. Saya opened the article, expecting it to be something negative about Ayame. But it wasn't. 

Apparently, Misa Wakita had been spotted at a restaurant in Roppongi Hills… with Tamami. The reporter was just as shocked as Ayame and Saya over the fact that the two seemed to be getting along.

Ayame sent another text message. “I have been trying to call her over the last few weeks but her phone goes straight to voicemail. Is this why? Is she being isolated? Or is she cutting us off? Fuck it. I'm done.”

“No way...” Saya said out loud.

“What is it?” Hajime asked, and Saya handed Hajime her phone.

“Tamami? She looks happy.” Hajime observed, and then she stared harder at the picture. It was a low quality picture taken from a cell phone, but something stood out to her - Tamami's sapphire necklace. Remembering what the nurse had told her, Hajime got chills.

Sending chrysanthemums to taunt someone who had almost died was definitely something that Tamami would do, Hajime figured.

“Something isn't right.” Saya shook her head. “We heard how Misa was talking to Tamami that day. We also saw what she did to her. Why would they go out in public…? Something seems shady…”

“Publicity stunt?” Hajime guessed. “I'd imagine that Misa's behavior towards Tamami negatively affected her image… so by taking happy pictures with her daughter…”

“That's true. But I hope that's not the case… then Tamami would be getting used. I was wondering why Tamami seemed to drop off the face of the Earth… and this is why. I wonder how long she's been seeing her.”

“The necklace.” Hajime zoomed in on the picture. “She was wearing that necklace the day after I got hospitalized, because she visited me. The nurse said that a girl brought me flowers as I was sleep… and she was wearing a sapphire necklace. I thought it was Sumi or Ayame, but I was wrong.”

“Tamami brought you flowers? That's nice of her…”

“She brought me chrysanthemums.”

“... seriously?” Saya frowned. “That’s so fucked up.”

“Tamami  _ is _ fucked up.” Hajime sighed. “But I'd probably be fucked up too if I had her mother. I hate her… but I pity her too. Geez. Misa threw her down five flights of stairs but Tamami still went back to her.”

“I can't hold that against her. At the end of the day, she's still Misa's child… she just wants to be loved and respected as such. On one hand, Misa could be taking advantage of that. On the other… well, I just hope that Tamami gets what she wants…”

Saya's voice trailed off, and Hajime didn't say anything. Neither knew what to say - because they both knew that whatever was going on between Misa and Tamami would not end well.

xxxxx

“Let Layla-san tell you about Dubai.”

It was nearing closing time at Mizuki Department Store, and Natalia was feeling grateful. As it was December, the Dior counter had been very busy. Luckily, Nanami and Natalia had gotten help in the form of a new girl - Layla, who had been working with them since the middle of November. She seemed a bit strange, referring to herself as Layla-san, but no one seemed to mind - it actually got her a small following among the customers. She seemed to be almost as good as a salesgirl as Hinako was. 

Almost.

As Nanami had left earlier that day, the two were on closing duty. The store closed in fifteen minutes, so the crowd had quieted down considerably from an hour ago. Both Layla and Natalia were grateful for this.

“Okay… tell me.” Natalia said. “But only on the condition that I get to talk about Brazil.”

“Of course!” Layla cleared her throat. “So Layla-san used to…”

“Excuse me. I'd like to buy something…” Layla and Natalia's conversation came to a halt as Hajime approached the counter. 

“I’m sorry.” Natalia said in Portuguese. “But none of our Japanese speaking employees are available right now.” She then switched back to Japanese. “I can't speak Japanese.”

“Eh?” Layla asked. She found this to be very confusing. “But you speak Japanese with Layla-san all the time…”

“She's xenophobic.” Natalia whispered loudly, and Layla's eyes got bigger in surprise.

“No way!”

Hajime turned to Layla, trying not to appear too embarrassed. “Excuse me… but if you don't mind… I'd like to talk to Natalia alone.”

“Layla-san will oblige.” Layla disappeared, and Hajime tried not to appear  _ too _ confused by Layla's peculiar way of speaking. Especially considering why Natalia was mad at her in the first place!

“What is it?” Natalia asked.

“I just wanted to apologize…”

“Your xenophobia is really… wait, what?” Natalia's eyes were huge. “Did you just…”

Hajime nodded. “I shouldn't have tried to pin what I did on you and Saya… and I shouldn't have attacked your country or heritage either… I was in a really bad place at the time, but now… I'm learning how to be a better person. I hope you can understand.”

“Of course I understand.” Natalia then lowered her voice. “You know… Saya told me what happened. So I have no doubt that you're telling the truth… I really hope that you're doing better now.”

“I am… thank you.”

“I hope you never feel that way again.” Natalia admitted. “Even though we aren't best friends or anything… or even on friendly terms right now, I would've been devastated… even now, I'm still touched by the mug you made me. It'll take a while for us to go back to how we used to be, but let's go into the new year with a clean slate.”

“Okay…” Hajime felt relieved. “As for what I was going to buy… don't worry about it. It's closing time, isn't it? Have a nice night.”

“You too.” Then in the first time in a while, Natalia smiled at Hajime, and Hajime smiled back. She hadn't been expecting for Natalia to forgive her, so this was a pleasant surprise. 

But then again… this was the easy one. There was no telling how Ayame, Tamami and Hinako would react. Apologizing to those three would be way harder… calling Natalia a “dirty foreigner” was  _ nothing _ compared to what she did to them. Hajime was definitely going to wait until after she met with Miyu to apologize to them… it was for the best.

xxxxx

“How do you let go of a grudge?” Hajime asked.

During the next session with Miyu, Hajime decided to get right to business. She had been thinking about this ever since she apologized to Natalia, as it was a pressing matter. She wouldn't be able to properly apologize to Ayame if she didn't acknowledge those feelings!

“This must be bothering you, since you usually don't ask questions at the start of a session.” Miyu observed.

“You're right… it is bothering me. One of my friends… well, I don't feel comfortable calling her a friend. She's more like a friend of a friend… I want to apologize to her, but I can't. I've been so mean to her, ever since we met.”

“Why? You should start there. Why were you so mean to her?”

“So her name is Ayame. Ayame is the same age as Hinako, and they were in the same class at school. Hinako is able to befriend anyone, so she made friends with Ayame… and Hinako introduced us to each other. I guess Ayame was expecting Hinako's friend Hajime to be a boy… since my name is masculine… so she was like, ‘You’re a girl?!’ or something like that.”

“I see…”

“So I got mad and dragged Hinako away from her. Ayame is friends with one of the girls in my class - Tamami. Tamami is really… messy, so she started a rumor that I had lice. That should've been a sign I should've left Tamami alone, but… I was in denial. I forced myself to believe that Ayame started it. So I dragged her out of her class one day and fought her. Ever since then…”

“Why did you do that? Not the fighting, but the denial.”

“I just wanted a reason to hate Ayame… Hinako is also an orphan. I thought Tamami was an orphan too, because she'd often come to school in a pitiful state, like she was being neglected. Her clothes looked ratty and she never had lunch. I never saw her parents either. But Ayame… she would come to school well dressed and happy. Her parents would always show up for Parents Day and the things she said about her family made me jealous… rich family owning a TV channel…”

“You're talking about Ayame Hamaguchi, aren't you?” Miyu interrupted.

“Yes. There's a lot of bad rumors about her, which I did my part in sharing. I wanted her to be a bratty princess so bad, so I could feel justified in hating her. But she wasn't. She's far from it… I feel like a piece of shit. Even now… when I was in the hospital, someone sent me chrysanthemums. I thought it was her… I  _ wanted  _ it to be her, but it was Tamami.”

“It sounds like Tamami is more of a problem than Ayame.”

“She is.” Hajime confirmed. “She outed me, but… that's for a different day. As for Ayame, she'd try so hard to be nice to me, but by the time I was in 9th grade and she was in 8th, she stopped trying. We're 19 and 20 now. It makes me wonder if I should just give up.”

“Well don't give up. You will feel better if you talk these feelings out…”

“But what do I say? I have no idea…”

“Put yourself in her shoes. If you were Ayame, what would you want to hear?”

“That's a good question. If I were Ayame, I'd want to hear…” Hajime's voice trailed off, as nothing was coming to mind. After five minutes of silence, she then sighed of defeat. “Nothing is coming to mind. Maybe our relationship is doomed…”

“Just because nothing is coming to mind  _ right now  _ doesn't mean that your relationship is done for.” Miyu reminded her. “I think you should try writing it out later. Don't force it if nothing is coming to mind - there is no rush.”

“Okay…”

The rest of the session went by relatively fast - Hajime ended up arguing with Miyu over whether or not it was even worth apologizing to Ayame. When Hajime stepped out of the hospital and onto the busy city street, she felt like shit. She felt even worse when she turned her phone screen on and saw that Saya had texted her.

“We need to talk.” she had sent it about twenty minutes ago, and Hajime's hands started shaking. She felt like she did that day at the hospital, that day when it felt like everything was closing in on her. What could Saya possibly want to talk about? Hajime was scared to find out - the last thing she needed was to lose Saya as a friend. So for that reason, Hajime began to type up an apology.

_ I'm sorry for inviting myself to celebrate Christmas with you. It's a family holiday, and your family is close… I could only imagine how awkward it would be for you guys to have an outsider join you. Please don't stop talking to me over this… you don't have to say yes just because you feel bad that I have no one. I'm sure I'll find something else to do… _

Hajime sent the message off as she walked, not even caring to look around. She was in her own little world, until she found herself walking into someone at a crosswalk. But this wasn't anyone… it was Tamami, whose complexion not only looked paler but her face looked a little different. Hajime was no expert on plastic surgery, but she could tell that Tamami got something done.

Tamami didn't greet Hajime, and she had no intention to. She  _ was _ going to ignore her, like she did with everyone in her old group, barring Hinako. Then Tamami saw the hospital looming in the background… and couldn't help herself.

“Good afternoon.” She greeted. “Did you have another mental breakdown?”

“What?” Hajime felt confused, if not a little hurt. 

“I'm just noticing that you left the hospital…” Tamami pointed at the building behind them.

“Yes… about that.” Hajime sighed. “I know what you did…”

Tamami giggled. “Did you like them? I felt like they were fitting for your situation. I know our ex-friends are happy that you made it through, but I can't say that. You don't even deserve the courtesy of a lie.”

“Tamami.” Hajime wanted to slap her, but she realized that there was a reason for what she was saying… because of her behavior. Hajime decided that now would be a good a good time to apologize.

“Can you stop wasting my time?” Tamami asked. “I have an appointment for collagen injections and I don't want to be late.”

“What's that?”

“I'm getting shots in my face. So I can look prettier.” Tamami explained. She was trying to appear confident, but the way she was shifting her feet was selling her out.

“You're getting shots in your face?” Hajime repeated in disbelief.

“Yeah… I got nose fillers and an epicanthoplasty awhile back… whatever it takes, right?”

“You got a what?”

Tamami pointed to her eyes. “I got the inner corners of my eyes cut… so they look bigger. They look bigger, right?”

“Right…” Hajime nodded. She didn't have the heart to tell Tamami that she was slowly morphing into one of Hinako's old porcelain dolls, which Hajime found creepy in itself. She  _ did  _ have a fear of those things!

“This is my rebirth… I'm going to be a new Tamami Wakiyama… no. Tamami  _ Wakita.” _

“Rebirth… do you want this for yourself?”

“Of course. Remember what I used to look like?” Tamami giggled nervously, as if she was trying to convince herself. “Mom pays a lot for these procedures and I don't want to let her down.”

“Your mom…”

“...she's helping me, because she's the only person who understands.” Tamami snapped. 

“She did what?” Hajime asked. “Who gave you that idea?”

“One of my new friends. We're very close, to the point that I'm letting her borrow my necklace right now, even though that was a gift from mom.”

“The sapphire one?”

“Yes. You don't know her, so don't worry about it. She said once I look pretty enough, mom will get me a movie role. That's when the fun really starts.”

“But you have stage fright.” Hajime was in disbelief. Back in school, Tamami couldn't even memorize vocabulary words. What lead her to believe that she could memorize entire scripts? Hajime decided not to say anything, as she didn't want to pick a fight.

“I'll get over it. I have no choice. I want to beat Ayame. I want to make her irrelevant… I want to kill her career. The first step though, is becoming prettier than her…”

_ Since when did Tamami have a problem with Ayame,  _ Hajime thought, but she could see that Tamami was growing impatient, so she decided to get her apology out.

“Back to the chrysanthemums and what you were saying about me…”

“Yeah?”

“I understand that you're hurt by what I did to you… going to the media and attacking your appearance… I can't control your feelings, but what I can do is say that I'm sorry.” Hajime apologized. “I really didn't mean to hurt you like that… and if I knew that your mother would've…”

Hajime was cut off by Tamami yawning loudly. “I'm sorry! Were you saying something? I wasn't paying attention…”

“Tamami, please listen to what I have to say.”

“No. I don't care if you want to apologize… I have no interest in forgiving you. I have no interest in being friends with you… or Saya, Ayame, or Natalia actually… I don't need you guys!”

“But Hinako?”

“I’m going to turn her against you.” Tamami snapped. “But let's be real… you ruined her life so much that my intervention may not be necessary. I don't know if you're trying to apologize to everyone, but you should just… stop. Things may have changed, but we can all agree that we hate you. Even Saya.”

“But Natalia…”

“I didn't ask about Natalia!” Tamami shouted. “Ayame and Hinako definitely hate you, Saya is too nice to say so, and I want you dead. Just looking at you makes me want to hang you by your hair! So if you will please…”

“I'm sorry. I'm really sorry for everything. Good luck with becoming an actress. I'll support you no matter wh-” 

“Shut the fuck up.” Tamami then looked at her watch, checking the time. As she did so, Hajime caught sight of Tamami's wrist, where there was an unsightly purple bruise. 

“Tamami…” Hajime began, and Tamami looked up from her watch. She was about to insult Hajime even further, but stopped once she noticed what Hajime was looking at.

“What happened to your wrist...?” Hajime asked. “I don't know what is going on, but that offer still stands…”

“Yeah sure… whatever. As for my wrist, don't worry about it.” Tamami answered. “Accidents happen.”

“Are you sure it was an…”

“I said accidents happen! Now leave me alone! I want nothing to do with you so forget I exist!” Tamami then ran across the street, leaving Hajime to stand alone on the corner. She felt very cold.

What if Tamami was right? No… Tamami was right! Saya and Natalia had only forgiven Hajime because they wanted to be nice. Of course they didn't actually like her. Hajime didn't even like herself! As for Ayame and Hinako… Hajime had ruined those relationships beyond repair. She knew that they would react to her like Tamami did.

What was the point of even trying? Suddenly feeling very overwhelmed with life, Hajime decided to go home. 

Good future be damned.


	21. XXI

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> double update in one day because I didn't post on Thursday or Friday (I was working on an art project hehe which I finished)
> 
> The Hajime Fujiwara Forgiveness Tour continues lol

XXI

Once Hajime got home, she turned her phone off and laid down on the couch, concentrating on the cushions. The house was silent, as neither Takashi or Sumi were home - or so Hajime thought. Either way, that was why Hajime decided to stay downstairs. It also didn't help that the entire ordeal with Saya, Miyu and Tamami made Hajime exhausted and she didn't feel like moving upstairs.

_ I'm just meant to be alone,  _ Hajime thought as she cried softly.  _ If Tamami reacted that badly to my apology… Ayame and Hinako will definitely not take it well. And Saya… how could I ruin things with Saya? Miyu is wrong, things will never get better, but that's all my fault. I ruin everything… _

Hajime's self-deprecating thoughts were interrupted by someone placing a blanket over her. It was Sumi, who looked somewhat concerned.

Hajime gathered the blanket and stood up from the couch, with the intention to leave. She had no interest in being around Sumi, who was only her mother when she could use Hajime as a doll or a trophy.

“Hajime, wait.”

“What is it?”

“What's wrong? You're crying.”

“Nothing that concerns you… I'm going upstairs. Aren't you glad that I'm crying inside and not out in public? I don't want you to be known as the woman with the crazy daughter, just when everyone is starting to forget.”

“I can't forget about something like that.” Sumi admitted. “And not in the way that you're thinking either… I've been doing a lot of reading lately… and I've realized that I've been going about this motherhood thing the wrong way…”

“That's nice, Sumi.” Hajime said dismissively. “Where was this attitude two months ago?”

“I'm sorry.” Sumi apologized. “I was so excited about having a daughter that I was only able to focus on the nice parts. That's always been a problem for me! Even when I was your age, I'd stick my head in the sand when it came to dealing with the ugly parts of life… I should stop doing that.”

“And it took me almost dying for you to realize that.”

“Yes… embarrassingly enough.” Sumi sighed. “I feel like I could've stopped it, but for now… seeing how different you are, I'm grateful for your friend. You know she talked to me that day, right?”

“Who? Hinako?”

“Who? No… her name was Saya. She came over the next morning and told us what happened...” Sumi explained. “She's such a good friend, and she seems to care about you a lot. I'm happy that you have her, to make up for my inadequacy.”

“Well, I  _ had  _ her.” Hajime corrected. “I don't think we are friends anymore… but I could say that for everyone who I thought was my friend.”

“Why?”

Not willing to go in-depth with Sumi, Hajime decided to keep her answer simple. “I made a few mistakes at the expense of my friends… and they all hate me now.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes… I apologized to two. One accepted my apology, but the other… she opened my eyes to the situation.”

“How?”

“She reminded me that no one was willing to accept me back… and she's right. I did horrible things… things that were unforgivable. I'm not even going to apologize to the other two, because I  _ know  _ they aren't willing to hear what I have to say… or if they do, they'll be like Saya and Natalia - and lie to keep the peace.”

“Lie?”

“Yes. They're both really nice and don't like conflict, so they'll say they forgive me, while actually not forgiving me…” 

“What makes you so sure?”

“Because Tamami said…”

“I'm going to assume that Tamami is the friend that 'opened your eyes to the situation’...” Sumi sighed. “This may not mean much, coming from me, but it sounds like she's trying to turn you against them… by pretending that she knows all.”

“What do you mean?”

“What makes you so sure that she knows what your other friends are thinking?” Sumi asked. “They may miss you too. I think… you should disregard what she's saying and still try to apologize. This way, even if they don't take it well, you can still say… I tried. And that's better than not apologizing at all.”

“You’re right.” Hajime nodded, thinking to herself. For whatever reason, Tamami now had a problem with everyone in the group except for Hinako - what would she know? She didn't seem to be happy either. Was it possible that Tamami was trying to drag Hajime down with her?

Knowing Tamami, it was.

“Good luck.” Sumi said, then she smiled. “That's enough from me. I'll let you rest. Think about what I was saying, okay?”

“Okay.” Hajime decided to go upstairs and go finish her nap.

Once she got upstairs, Hajime turned her phone on. A few minutes later, Saya sent her a message, in response to Hajime's apology. It read,

_ Don't worry Hajime! You have the wrong idea. I don't want to stop being friends with you, but I'm… I'm hoping you'll feel the same way after our conversation. Let's talk later… I'm at Kaori's house right now. _

“I don't want to stop being friends with you, but I'm hoping you'll feel the same way after our conversation?” Hajime read out loud. “What is she saying? Does she have a secret…” Hajime began to think, her imagination running wild. Maybe it was possible that Saya was too good to be true? Did Saya have a dark past? Maybe she bonded with Hajime because her parents were also criminals? Or maybe Saya herself was a criminal?

“That's it. She's the gang boss of Ikebukuro.” Hajime announced, and then she found herself laughing at the image of Saya leading a gang. Whatever Saya's secret was, Hajime hoped that it wasn't _ that  _ bad! As for Hajime, she didn't actually fall back asleep. Instead, she thought about what Sumi was saying, and then decided that she was going to continue on with her apologies.

But between Hinako and Ayame, who was she going speak to first? She decided to go with the easier option first, and save the final boss for last...

xxxxx

“Thank you for shopping with us. I hope you have a wonderful day!”

“You too!”

With the customer gone, Hinako sat down in her chair and sighed in relief. It was parent-teacher conference day at Serika's school, and Momo had gone to tend to that. For a few hours, Hinako was in charge of Hakozaki Fabrics, although there was nothing to be in charge of. It was a slow day today, but that might've had something to do with the fact that it was snowing outside. The forecast had called for 15 cm of snow, which Hinako found exciting.

But watching the snow fall could only keep Hinako's attention for so long - now she was working on something else, drawing a dress she had a dream about. This dress was a blend of traditional and modern styles - Hinako knew the perfect fabric to use for it. It was fabric  _ intended  _ to be used for curtains, but Hinako seriously believed that the fabric would suit her dress. There was one way to find out… she'd definitely buy the fabric before heading home.

“It needs flowers.” Hinako mused. “Cream colored flowers… they'll look good on my model…”

Hinako put her colored pencil down and stared down at her drawings, flipping through the sketchbook. The dresses were different, but the model was the same girl. 

_ I voted for you for a reason _ , Hinako thought. She then looked up, to look at the snow, but she nearly fell out of her chair once she noticed that her model had seemingly materialized in front of her! 

“Hello Hinako…” Hajime began, and Hinako quickly shut her sketchbook, hugging it protectively.

“I'm sorry… how long have you been waiting? I didn't hear the door open.”

“I've only been here for a minute…” Hajime answered. “But it's fine. I won't tell your boss or anything… I know how you tend to lose yourself when it comes to fashion design…”

“I’m very fortunate that I can still do this.” Hinako said matter-of-factly. “A couple of months ago, I couldn't even write. Even now, my new sketches aren't as good as the old ones… and sewing is really hard now… I'm making all kinds of mistakes. But I can't give up… because this is still my dream…”

“Hinako…”

“I always wonder how different things would be if the accident didn't happen.” Hinako mused. “But then again… I'm starting to realize that it wasn't an accident. Everything happens for a reason…”

“I'm sorry!” Hajime blurted out. “I didn't know that Fumika would go that far… and I wasn't in the right state of mind… I was in a bad position mentally and…”

“Huh? What are you apologizing for?” Hinako asked, standing up. “It's not your fault.”

Now it was Hajime's turn to be confused. She remembered that Hinako didn't remember certain things, like her mother being dead, but surely she remembered Hajime's confession, right? She had to, since Hinako  _ did _ kick her out afterwards!

Hinako took Hajime's silence as an invitation to continue. “When I was remembering parts of my life in the hospital… I asked the nurses to show me the article that Kaori wrote about my dad… the last part stuck out to me.”

“The part about you dying in the fire?”

“No… the part about my dad not being able to escape divine retribution. I asked the nurse what that meant, and she told me… it's the universe punishing you for sins you committed. I thought about it some more and I realized that everything that happened over the last two months is because I'm being punished for my bad behavior. I deserve this… I deserve this and whatever else happens to me. So don't feel bad, okay?” Hinako smiled at Hajime, but Hajime didn't feel good seeing this. For starters, she didn't exactly agree with what Hinako was saying. And secondly, despite the smile on her face, Hinako's eyes had began to water up, as if she were about to start crying.

“I can't  _ not  _ feel bad.” Hajime told her. “I feel some kind of responsibility… I did talk to Fumika. I had the intention of getting her to hurt you…”

“Which you wouldn't have done if I didn't hurt you first.” Hinako interrupted. “Remembering those memories in the hospital was… upsetting. Everyone would say that we were best friends, but if we were, I wouldn't have treated you like that… my birthday party, me pretending to accept your apology, me going to Aki, me trying to expose you, me using you for your money, me ruining your birthday… me lying about it… all the name calling and verbal abuse…” Hinako walked around the counter, so that she was now standing in front of Hajime. She kept going,

“You were in love with me, and I used that to my advantage… I disregarded your feelings to the very end, pretending that you didn't exist after I 'matured’. I remember what happened at my house… in my room. I should've been clear so there wouldn't have been any misunderstandings. I should've been nicer about what I was trying to say… it was obvious back then that you weren't feeling well… but I was focused on myself. I didn't care if I made you feel worse… I just wanted to be left alone…”

“Um… wow. Okay.” Hajime couldn't believe what she was hearing. This entire conversation was taking an unexpected turn - Hajime believed that she would be the one apologizing, not Hinako! 

“I'm happy that you look like the Hajime I remember… but happier. The girl I saw up until now wasn’t the Hajime Fujiwara I know.” Hinako continued. “The strong and friendly girl… who deserves better than a shit friend like me…”

“Come on… I'm not that strong…” Hajime's voice trailed off. 

“But you are! You can get through everything on your own… and I'm always needing help… even now… I'm always needing help…” Hinako sighed miserably. 

“That's the problem… I get through everything on my own… you think I'm strong, but I'm actually not.”

“Yes you are!”

“No I'm not. If I was… I wouldn't have had a mental breakdown and tried to kill myself.” Hajime muttered under her breath. She had been hoping that Hinako didn't hear it, but Hinako's panicked expression confirmed that she did in fact, hear everything.

“What? What? When did this happen?” Hinako asked. Her voice was marked with worry.

“The night after the infamous hospital visit.” Hajime answered. “I just… I don't know… I can't explain how I was feeling, but…”

Hajime was interrupted by the sound of Hinako falling to her knees. At first, Hajime thought she was in shock, but then she realized that Hinako was  _ kneeling. _

“I'm sorry for everything…” Hinako cried. “I'm really… truly a shit friend for pushing you that far… no… we aren't friends. I can't call myself your friend anymore… I don't deserve that title…”

“No. You're wrong. I don't deserve that title.” Hajime corrected. “I set you up and tried starting a witch hunt… you could've died thanks to me and Fumika…”

“That's just divine retribution.” Hinako corrected. “If I didn't act like a royal brat…” she laughed derisively. “I wanted to be the princess so badly but now I'm a criminal's daughter with a 50 billion yen debt…”

“Please stop it with this divine retribution crap… you didn't deserve getting assaulted. What happened wasn't your fault. Don't blame yourself for your current state… you're doing the best you can. So please… stand up.”

Hinako stopped kneeling, wiping her tears as she stood up. “I don't even know what I'm going to do about it… my dresses were supposed to help me pay it off, but I can barely sew these days… isn't it funny? I made fun of you because I thought you were a prostitute… while I might actually end up becoming one…” Hinako sighed deeply. 

“You don't have to do that… you can still pay off your debt…”

“How?”

Hajime reached into her purse and pulled out a check. She handed it to Hinako, who looked confused as she took it in - it was a check for 5 million yen, made out to Hinako Kita.

“Before you say anything… you don't actually owe 50 billion yen. It's 5 million… I was upset so I inflated the number…” Hajime explained. 

“I see…” Hinako handed the check back to Hajime. “Fifty billion… five million, I can't accept this…”

“But you should.”

Hinako shook her head. “Save this effort for your friends…”

“You are my friend, and I can't let you stress yourself out over this debt while you're still recovering from your accident.” Hajime informed her, handing the check back to Hinako. “Take this as a olive branch… with this you can pay those families back.”

“I really can't…” Hinako insisted. “I want to stand on my own two feet… I want to do this on my own. I don't want you to hate me for needing help all the time… when you can do everything on your own.”

“No… the reason why I do everything on my own is because I  _ feel  _ like I don't deserve help. I didn't hate you for being helpless, I hated you because you were able to accept good things happening to you. I was jealous.”

“Really?”

“Yes, really. It's stupid, but now I'm learning that it's okay to accept these things… that I am no different than anyone else. I deserve to be happy too.”

“You’re right, but… I remember what happened the last time you were here. I know you don't want me being a fashion designer… is that why you're giving me that?”

“No. I'm  _ really _ giving it to you because I don't want you to make yourself sick over this debt… I'm really sorry for not supporting your dream like I should've. But that will be different now. You can still be a designer, and this time, I'll support you! With the debt paid off, you can now relearn how to sew on your own terms, and you won't make yourself sick with stress.” Hajime explained. “Please trust me.”

After a few minutes of silence, Hinako wiped the tears from her eyes. “Okay.” she said finally. “I trust you.”

Just as Hinako took the check from Hajime, the door to the store opened, and Momo and Serika walked in.

“Hinako!” Serika greeted, running over to her and hugging her. 

Hinako awkwardly hugged her back, trying not to drop the check on to the floor. While Serika didn't say anything about the current situation, Momo saw Hinako take the check, and she recognized Hajime, who was staring at Serika in confusion.

“Is everything alright?” Momo asked Hinako, then she glared at Hajime, who now felt very intimidated.

“Yes… everything is fine.” Hinako answered. “My friend was just helping me with the debt I have to pay off.”

“Friend?” Serika's brown eyes got bigger and she immediately got into Hajime's face. “What's your name? I've never seen you before! Welcome to our shop. Please buy something!”

“Ah… please excuse my daughter. She's very excitable.” Momo told Hajime. “Well, I'm Momo, and this is Serika. What is your name?”

“Hajime Fujiwara. It's nice to meet you both!”

xxxxx

“I hope you've been doing well… the last time we spoke was… well, it feels like it was years ago.”

“I'm sorry for that.”

A few days later, on the other side of town, Ayame had been sitting in her dressing room, concentrating intensely on her reflection. She had been doing this for the past hour, as her show had gone off for the day. Ayame had been doing this for the last few weeks, just hiding out in her dressing room and thinking for hours. She had intended to do this today, but had gotten a surprise in the form of Natalia, who had decided to visit her.

“I don't blame you… things must be getting busy, since Christmas is coming up. Well, things are getting busy at my job. I don't know how it is here…”

“The lines are going off the hook here. It's so busy… I love it.” Ayame told her.

“You do?” Natalia made no effort to hide her surprise. “Well… they call you the crown jewel of TV shopping for a reason.”

“Yes… that's one of my many nicknames, one of the few worth repeating. The rest are pretty bad.”

“I know. But I think it's amazing that you don't let your anti fans bother you… because if it were me…” Natalia shook her head.

“They're just cowards. Case in point… Karin brought me this yesterday.”

Ayame reached under the table and handed Natalia a box. Natalia slowly opened it, revealing a teddy bear… which had been cut up, with razors left in it's fur. The stuffing had been dyed red, to make it look like blood.

“This is…” Natalia felt herself getting chills.

“Karin had no idea, so I'm not mad at her. I'm not even mad at whoever sent this. I'm just annoyed at this point. How long will the harassment go on for? When will they get bored? Will they ever get bored? Whatever. Thanks Hajime.”

“Hajime? Oh yeah… she spread the rumors.”

“At this point, what hasn't she done? Evil wench…”

“I think you have the wrong idea about Hajime. You know, she actually apologized to me right?”

“Did you accept the apology?”

“Of course I did. She seemed very sincere. We've been talking for a few days… it seemed awkward at first, but I can tell that she is different now. But in a good way.”

“I'm surprised she even apologized…” Ayame muttered. “Since she's so prideful and stubborn.”

“Me too. But do you want to hear something even more surprising? Last night I called Hinako, and she was over Hajime's house. They must've apologized to each other… she was spending the night, and they were watching Wizard of Oz… Hajime is super partial towards that movie.”

“Weird. Was Saya there?”

“I don't think so. But back to Hajime… she apologized to me and Hinako.”

“What about Tamami?”

“If she did, it probably didn't go well… I actually saw her yesterday in the store. I said hi and she ignored me. I think she got plastic surgery, she looks a little different in the face. She's definitely using skin lightening cream though…”

“Good for her. I don't care, Natalia.”

“Okay. But you know… it looks like Hajime is apologizing to everyone who she wronged… so I have to ask, did Hajime apologize to you?”

“No. And I'm not expecting it either - you know when it comes to her, I'm always the one in the wrong. But just in case… I should tell her now that I'm not interested in whatever it is she has to say…”

“Ayame.”

“What? Whatever she has to say will be several years too late. And besides… I can tell how important it is to her, since she seems to be saving me for last.”

“Maybe it's because she has anxiety? Like she probably knows she treated you like shit and she's afraid…”

“Maybe… either way, I don't care. I give zero fucks about being her friend. The rest of you have positive memories to make you open towards forgiving her, but I don't.”

“You should at least listen to what she has to say…” Natalia sighed. “I'm going to run to the bathroom real quick. I'll be back.”

“Okay. Take your time. I'm not going anywhere.”

Natalia left the room. As soon as Ayame felt like she was far away enough, she grabbed her phone and dialed Hajime's phone number. Hajime didn't pick it up until the very last ring. 

“Ayame? Why are you calling me?” Hajime's tone was nervous, and Ayame suddenly felt empowered.

“Some things never change.” Ayame mused. “But don't worry, I won't call you again after this. I just wanted to tell you straight up, so that you won't waste my time and yours. I heard you're going on some kind of apology tour… you can keep mine. I don't give a fuck about you or anything you have to say.”

Hajime was silent for a few minutes, and Ayame was about to hang up on her. But just as she was about to press the end call button, Hajime suddenly spoke up.

“I understand why you feel that way. You tried so hard to be my friend for years, but every chance I got… I treated you like crap. No… I bullied you.”

“What brought you to that realization?” Ayame asked sarcastically.

“My therapist…” Hajime sighed. “It's really a lot, and I don't feel comfortable talking about this over the phone, which was why I was going to meet with you in person… but if you don't want to, I will respect your wish. Same goes for us ever being friends… because we were never friends to begin with.”

_ She's being really honest, maybe I was too hard on her _ , Ayame thought as she tried to figure out what to say. Finally, it came to her.

“Do you really mean what you say?”

“Yes…”

“Okay then. Let's meet at Roppongi Hills at 8 pm, on the observation deck. I changed my mind. I want to hear what you have to say.”

“Okay. It's a deal. I'll see you there.”

Ayame then hung up on Hajime, then threw her phone across the makeup table. Feeling exasperated, she screamed a bit, which attracted the attention of Natalia.

“What's going on? Are you alright?”

“Yes… fine. I just have to go to Roppongi Hills tonight.”

“For what?”

“Hajime. I'm going to give Hajime a chance. I don't know if I'm going to accept her, but that largely depends on what she has to say.”

“I'm sure you won't be disappointed.”

“We'll see about that.”

xxxxx

Later that night, Hajime was at the observation deck at Roppongi Hills. The view was beautiful, but Hajime couldn't focus on that at all. Instead, she was more focused on listening - every time someone walked by, Hajime would turn around, expecting Ayame, but instead, it would be a stranger. 

Maybe Ayame wouldn't actually show up. If she didn't, Hajime couldn't blame her. 

As for how Hajime felt, she felt lost. She wanted to ask Saya for advice, but Saya didn't actually answer her calls or her messages. She couldn't ask Hinako, or anyone else either, because Hajime was starting to feel undeserving of happiness again. 

“I can do this…” Hajime said quietly, closing her eyes. 

“Who are you talking to?”

Hajime was so startled by Ayame's sudden reappearance that she nearly fell into the window. She was also startled by the fact that Ayame actually showed up - for some reason, she was expecting for Ayame to stand her up.

“Myself. Um… do you want to sit down somewhere? There's a really nice restaurant downstairs and…”

“I ate dinner already, but thank you.” Ayame told her. “As for what's going on… we can talk here. So what is it? What do you want to say here that you couldn't say over the phone? Or rather… where did we leave off? Oh right… how did you come to the conclusion that you were bullying me? You made it seem like I was deserving of it before.”

“You're right… I was holding a grudge against you.”

“That's not new information. Seriously…? Are you going to tell me that we're in Roppongi Hills next? If you were going to waste my time like this…”

“I was holding a grudge against you, because I wanted to be you.” Hajime told her. “I was jealous of how different your life was from mine. It's perfect… you have two parents that love you and your family is rich… while I was just a poor orphan.”

“You… you think my life is perfect?” Ayame laughed. 

“I was a kid… the one thing I wanted was a family, an actual family. I wanted someone who I could call mom or dad… even now, I can't bring myself to call my parents mom or dad. You're lucky.”

“Yes. I guess I am.” Ayame sighed. “But with all due respect, you have no idea what you're talking about. My life is not perfect. My parents are not actually my parents, and both of their families are conservative… I don't have a relationship with any of them besides my paternal grandfather. They all refuse to accept me just because I don't have the same blood as them.”

“Really?”

“I was adopted as a baby because my mom could not conceive. My actual birth parents didn't want me…” Ayame shrugged. “I don't let it bother me as much as it used to. If anyone asks, my parents are my parents, because they  _ are _ .”

“I had no idea… I'm happy that your family now is better.”

“Besides that… I was viciously bullied up to a certain point… to the point I had to not only get counseling for it, but my grandfather taught me how to fight because I got jumped one day on my way home from school. Even now… I still get harassed by my loving fans, no thanks to rumors spread by you.”

“I'm sorry for spreading those… I thought you had an easy life… but I was wrong.”

“No one has an easy life.” Ayame snapped. “Maybe if you got to know me you would've seen that. What's even more ridiculous is the fact that you think that you're somehow in the position to make someone's life harder. Who do you think you are, deciding that someone's life is too easy or not?”

“I was immature. It was an immature thing to do, and looking back, I'm embarrassed.”

“You should be. I still get hate mail to this day… and these rumors will follow me for the rest of my life. Thank you so much.”

“Ayame…”

Ayame sighed. “I appreciate you taking the time to apologize and explain yourself. I really do, but… if you were expecting forgiveness… I can't. I'm sorry. The others may have good memories to help them, but me…? You've only showed me your worst, for twelve straight years. If you weren't being downright hostile towards me, you were being passive aggressive. And then you spit in my face. That right there tells me how much you value me as a person. Even though I can tell that you mean what you say… I can't accept this right now. I'm sorry.”

“I understand.” Hajime said, feeling dejected. “I'm just happy that you decided to hear me out… and you're being so civil about it too. It's more than what I deserve… I ruined this relationship and there's nothing I can do about it. So don't apologize to me for being unable to forgive.”

“Don’t be like that. Maybe one day we can be friends.” Ayame mused. “One day… when we've both healed from this ordeal - I may have been the victim, but you're also hurting. But until then, I wish you luck with everything. I am happy you are feeling better too.”

“I understand completely. I wish you luck with your career.” Hajime said.

“Thank you. Have a nice night.” Ayame then left the observation deck, leaving Hajime to sigh in relief. She was surprised that this went over relatively well - Hajime had expected for Ayame to behave similarly to Tamami or even worse, but she was being very mature about it. 

Hajime could not wait to tell Miyu about this, but for now, she was going to walk around the complex and just  _ breathe _ . She did it, she apologized to everyone! Natalia and Hinako came around, apologizing to Ayame turned out to be easier than expected, and Tamami… as much as it hurt to lose a friend, Hajime felt it was for the better if they went their separate ways.

Everything was going to end well!

Or so Hajime thought. She had been on the third floor of the complex, when Saya walked out of a stationary shop. Maybe it was because Hajime was in a relaxed mood, she found herself approaching her friend.

“Hey Saya!”

“Oh my God!” Saya had been so surprised by Hajime that she dropped her shopping bag. Hajime picked it up and smiled at her, handing her the bag. Saya slowly took it, her face red, with what Hajime assumed was embarrassment.

“I'm glad you're okay.” Hajime started. “You've been ignoring me for a while, which you normally don't do. I thought something bad happened.”

“Well nothing bad happened.” Saya said. “I'm sorry for ignoring you, I didn't mean to…”

“It's fine. I probably made things awkward with my request for Christmas.” Hajime laughed nervously. “Who was I kidding? You and your parents are very close.”

“We are. But that's not it…” 

“What is it then?”

“I should just tell you the truth now… instead of dragging it out. It's about your request for Christmas.”

“What about it?” Hajime asked. She suddenly felt fatigued by this conversation.

“I actually was going to ask you if wanted to come over, but you asked first. And that scared me, for a lack of a better term. It was like you were reading my mind.”

“I guess… so… why didn't you ask sooner?”

“I kind of assumed that you were doing something with Hinako, especially since you guys seem to be talking again.”

“Eh? Why? She's spending it with Momo and Serika. She's especially close with Serika, and I don't want to make things awkward for all of them, because I barely know them.”

“That makes sense… I just thought that you were going to be with her… since you still have feelings for her.”

“Yes…” Hajime's face grew hot. As crazy as it sounded, Hajime's crush on Hinako never actually went away, but at this point, Hajime gave up on the idea of them ever being together.

“I see. Well… I guess I should be honest with you, since friends are supposed to be honest. I've been talking about it a lot with my parents, and…” Saya's voice trailed off.

“And what?”

“I have a crush on you.”

 


	22. XXII

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The end is here.

XXII

“You… you what?”

Even though it was a busy night at Roppongi Hills, and the two were surrounded by people, it felt like Saya and Hajime were the only two there. All Hajime could see was Saya, and all she could hear was her heart beating.  _ No way, no way _ … Hajime kept thinking. She couldn’t believe this… Saya Matsubara liked  _ her _ ? 

“I have a crush on you.” Saya repeated. “I like you… like I  _ really _ like you.”

“But why?!” Hajime shouted. “Is this some kind of joke? Or is this a story for your blog? Either way… I don’t like it.”

“You think I’m lying?” Saya asked. “You think this is a story for my blog? I’ve felt this way for a while now.”

“Really? How long? How long have you liked me for?” Hajime challenged. She sounded rude and confrontational, but she couldn’t help it. After all, this felt like a prank. There was no way that someone like Saya would like someone like her… right?

“For a while now.” Saya repeated, closing her eyes. She felt like she was getting interrogated. “When we met at Hinako’s party, I had good feelings about you, but I realized, as time went on, that those feelings were stronger than what is normal. When we met again in the pawn shop, I was really happy, because I was starting to think that I was never going to see you again. As for when I definitely knew I had a crush on you… it was back during our trip to the art museum and the Rose Cafe.”

“So if you liked me back then, why didn’t you say something?”

“Because…  I know you liked Hinako. And besides, it was inappropriate, given all that went on. I was able to hide my feelings for a while, but when you asked about Christmas, it brought me back to reality. Back in June, I would dream about me asking you out on the 28th of December, and you asking about Christmas reminded me… my parents encouraged me to tell you, and I am trusting them.”

“What’s the significance of December 28th?” Hajime asked.

“That’s my birthday.” Saya informed her. “There’s a certain place I want to go to… the tree garden. It is open for the entire month of December, every year. I would’ve gone alone, but the atmosphere is… romantic. I don’t think it would be the same if I went by myself. With that being said…”

“You want me to go with you as your girlfriend.” Hajime inferred.

“Kind of… but I just want to go with you. As a friend, as a girlfriend, or whatever. I just want to go with someone special to me, and that's you.” Saya admitted. “What do you say to that?”

Hajime didn’t know what to say at first. After staring at Saya for what felt like ten minutes, she just shook her head. 

“I think… I think you have serious issues, to be in love with someone like me.”

“Hajime, wait.”

But Hajime didn’t wait. She ran away from Saya, trying her hardest not to cry. In her head, Saya had just pulled a practical joke on her, and Hajime did not like this at all.

xxxxx

The way home from Roppongi Hills was horrible - Hajime took a cab and had to hold her tears in the entire ride. Once she paid the fare, and was walking down the sidewalk of her neighborhood, Hajime let the tears fall. 

“I don’t deserve it… I don’t deserve her… Saya is too good for me… why does she like me? There's no way… she can't. What does she see in me…” Hajime asked herself. As her neighborhood was residential, she was the only other person outside. Despite that, Hajime still held herself back from sobbing. She needed to get inside, where she could cry freely. There was no point in worrying about Takashi or Sumi bothering her, because the two had went to Hawaii for the holiday. Sumi had asked Hajime if she wanted to come, but Hajime quickly said no once she remembered who exactly lived in Hawaii. Sumi did not object to this. She was going to spend Christmas alone, which Hajime felt like she deserved. Sure, it hurt, but Hajime hurt others. She could handle this… just like she handled everything else.

“She thinks she’s so funny… 'I’ve liked you for a long time’, do you think this a joke? I'm unlikeable. She can't...” Hajime wiped the tears from her eyes as she approached the gate of her house. She turned the touchpad on and was about to enter the code, but froze once she heard the sound of someone sniffling.

Did someone follow her? Was Hajime being followed? Aki should’ve been several thousand miles away, and Akira had no reason to seek her out. Feeling extremely worried, Hajime lightly touched the string of pearls around her neck. Was Kyoko back? Miho did say that she only got sick around pearls - they didn’t kill her. 

Whoever it was, Hajime had no choice but to defend herself. She stuck her house key in between her pointer and middle finger, and then turned around, with the intention to slice and dice whoever it was… only to see it was Tamami, who was crouched on the ground and shivering. Seeing Tamami made Hajime realize that it was best to wipe her tears and act as though nothing had happened - after all, Tamami was still Tamami.

“Oh my God, you startled me. How long have you been here?” Hajime asked.

Tamami stood up, shivering in the December cold. “I don’t know…” she answered, her teeth chattering. “I turned my phone off and…”

“Let’s go inside.” Hajime opened the gate and the two went into the house. Tamami sat in the living room on the sofa, while Hajime ran upstairs, thinking. What was Tamami doing here? She wanted to kick her out, but Hajime decided against it once she realized that Tamami was taking advantage of her offer.

As horrible of a person Tamami was, Hajime wasn’t going to turn her away in her time of need. Especially since Tamami had nowhere else to go. She grabbed a blanket and went back downstairs. Tamami was still on the sofa, her face buried in her hands.

“Here.” Hajime handed Tamami the blanket, and Tamami wrapped herself in it.

“T-thanks.” Tamami said quietly.   
“Did you eat yet?”

“No…”

“Okay.”

Hajime went into the kitchen, thinking. She herself hadn’t eaten dinner yet, but she wasn’t sure of what she should make. As Hajime thought this over, Tamami walked into the kitchen.

“You don’t have to do this.” she started. “I don’t deserve this… and I’ll be gone as soon as the sun is up tomorrow morning. So please don’t worry about me…”

“I can’t help it.” Hajime said. “Even though you caused your fair share of trouble… I can’t just turn my back on you.”

“But you should.” Tamami let out a heavy sigh. 

“If you leave, where will you go? Back home? To Ayame's house?”

“No… I don't know. But I'll figure something out. I have to.”

“What happened?” 

Tamami sighed heavily. “Remember when we met outside of the hospital? I was going to get injections in my face, but as I got to the clinic, I got scared and ran away. My mom just found out today and she chased me out the house with a poker, that she took out of the fireplace. She took it personally and called me an ungrateful bitch. I told her that I never wanted to get facial injections, I don't like needles. She said she was going to ruin my face for real.”

“Your mom is… crazy.” Hajime couldn't think of anything else to say.

“Yeah… I've known that for the last twenty years. You know… I didn't come here first. I went to Ayame's house and I watched them from outside. They were decorating their Christmas tree… Ayame's family doesn't feel real, it was like I was watching a movie. But then the door opened and Ayame walked out. I guess she was going somewhere? I didn't stay around to find out. I ran away.”

“Why did you run away from Ayame? I'm surprised that you chose me over her.”

“Well… you disliking me is not as surprising as Ayame disliking me!” Tamami admitted. “The day I sent the chrysanthemums, I overheard Saya, Natalia and Ayame talking about me. They were talking shit about me, calling me trash and a headache. Ayame even said that the only reason she talked to me was because she felt bad for me… because of my mother! I did nothing wrong for them to attack me like this.”

“You did nothing wrong?” Hajime repeated. “Are you serious right now?”

“Yes… that's what I said, Hajime! All I did was be a good friend.” Tamami said, sniffling. 

“Okay. You outed me online, got me fired from my job, and sent me chrysanthemums to hurt me! Good friends don't do that! No one in our group can trust you with their secrets either, so are you really a good friend?”

“I said what I said.”

“But you're wrong! You  _ are _ trash and you  _ are _ a headache! While you don't deserve any of the abuse you get… you aren't a good person in the least! You are toxic and seem to be proud of your bad behavior! That's not normal! Why are you like this? Why?!”

Tamami opened her mouth to say something, then she closed it. She had nothing to say, so she left the kitchen. Once Tamami was gone, Hajime let out a sigh of frustration and stood in the kitchen for a half hour, thinking. She no longer felt like eating dinner, or doing anything besides laying in her bed and trying to forget about everything that had happened after her conversation with Ayame.

That was what Hajime was going to do. She began to walk towards the stairs, but she noticed Tamami staring at herself intensely in a mirror on the wall.

“Tamami?” Hajime called out. “I'm going to go to sleep. Will you be okay on your own?”

“What do you care? I'm  _ toxic _ .” Tamami muttered. “Go to bed.”

“Okay. Good night.”

Hajime then went upstairs, and began to get ready for bed. As she brushed her teeth, Saya called her. As Hajime’s mouth was full of toothpaste, she just let it ring. Saya then texted her, but Hajime didn’t even read what she sent. She turned her phone off and went to sleep. Well, she attempted. She spent the next 45 minutes or so tossing and turning in her bed, despite being exhausted only a few hours before.

_ Why can’t I fall asleep? I hope I’m not slipping like I did before… _ Hajime’s worries over her mental health were interrupted as she heard noises from downstairs. But not just any noises, it was Tamami, who was talking. 

“Why is everything getting worse? I can’t take it anymore… everyone hates me. What should I do? What can I do?” Tamami was saying. Hajime figured that Tamami was either talking to herself or on the phone with someone, as it wasn’t really all that late. Hajime decided to mind her business, but that changed when she heard a second voice.

“I told you it was a bad idea to come here. How many times do I have to tell you? Everyone hates you.” Even though Hajime was under three blankets, she got chills once she heard that voice. She threw the blankets off of her then quietly left her bedroom, stopping at the top of the stairs, hiding in the darkness. Downstairs, Tamami had turned the lights off, except for a small light that Sumi kept in the living room. It wasn’t very bright, but Hajime could see Tamami sitting on the couch, her head in her hands. Kyoko was unsurprisingly staring at herself in the wall mirror… wearing Tamami’s sapphire necklace.

“I know, I know…” Tamami muttered. “But I just had hope that Hajime would be different, because of all that she said…”

“Different? You think Hajime is different?” Kyoko laughed. She left the mirror and now stood above Tamami. “Humans are so stupid… Hajime went to the media, out of her own will. What makes you think that she won’t do it again?”

“I just have hope that things will be different this time. Don’t you feel the same way?” Tamami asked, “That’s why I went back to Mom…”

“And she continues to beat the crap out of you.” Kyoko interrupted, wiping her forehead. “God… do you realize how pathetic you are, to keep coming back to that? At this point, I wonder if you truly want to have a better future, or if you just like playing the victim. Stop wasting my time and do what I say… I feel disrespected… friends don’t treat friends like this.”

“I’m sorry… everything is so confusing. I got the plastic surgery like you said, but I still feel horrible… this face isn’t mine and it’s hard to accept it. I just wish I could leave this world behind, and go with you. I want to start over.” Tamami looked up at Kyoko, her eyes glassy. “Can I go with you?”

“If you truly want to…” Kyoko smiled at her. “It would be nice. We could live together… I currently live alone and it’s super lonely… since my last roommate moved out. Even though everyone around you hates you, I actually like you… we have a lot in common.”

“Yeah… we both have famous parents who don’t really acknowledge us. Both of our best friends are more successful than we are, we’re in their shadows…”

“Hmm… I guess you can say that.” Kyoko didn’t sound very enthused, in fact, she seemed to pale over at the mention of Miho. “So you want to come with me. You can, but… you need to do something special, because if you tried to come with me right now… you’d end up going in the opposite direction.”

“That is definitely a lie…” Hajime muttered to herself.

“Ah… so what should I do?” Tamami asked. “I’ll do anything, anything!”

“Hajime is upstairs, asleep.” Kyoko told her. “Burn this place to the ground, and I’ll see you on the other side… as my friend.”

All of Tamami’s enthusiasm had faded. “Um… you want me to commit arson? Surely there’s less extreme things I can do…”

“You don’t get sent to Hell by being nice.” Kyoko reminded her. She had started shivering, Hajime noticed. “Those curtains look super flammable…  and Hajime’s room is right above them.”

“But… killing Hajime?”

“It’s worth it. You can either stay here and continue to be ugly and weak Tamami, who gets beat up by everyone else, or you come with me and live the life and get the respect that you deserve. Your decision~”

“I’ll think about it…” 

“Don’t think… do.” Kyoko tossed a lighter at Tamami, then smiled at her, but Tamami didn’t smile back at her.

Tamami stared at the lighter, then looked at Kyoko, her eyes full of worry. “I'm sorry… but I can't… I won't kill Hajime.”

“You're pathetic. Seriously. Now I understand why your mom…” Kyoko didn't finish her sentence. She covered her mouth with her hands, like she was trying to hold something down.

“Kyoko?”

“Hmm?”

“Are you okay? You don’t look so good. Your face is…”

“I’m f-f-f-fine, I s-s-swear…” Kyoko insisted, waving her hand dismissively. 

“But you're…” Tamami stood up from the couch, and handed a nearby tissue box to her. Kyoko reacted by slapping the box out of Tamami's hands and then shoving her back onto the couch.

“Don't touch me, you rat!” 

“Rat? I thought we were friends!”

“Friends?” Kyoko laughed. “You think I'd seriously want to be friends with someone like you…? Not only are you hard to look at, but you're absolutely pathetic. I give you everything and you can't even do me a simple favor…?”

As this was going on, Hajime slowly made her way down the steps. However, she found herself stopping once she saw Kyoko’s current condition. It was hard to see from the top of the stairs, but now that she was closer, Hajime could see that Kyoko had started sweating, and that her skin looked paler than usual. She had also broken out in a blotchy rash - she was definitely having a reaction to Hajime’s earrings. 

But despite that, all Kyoko did when she saw Hajime was smirk at her. “Hello Hajime. I see Miho had gotten to you. You look so happy… and healthy… it’s sickening.”

“Maybe you should take her advice… stop taking advantage of people who are in vulnerable positions. I don't know what happened to make you like this… or how much pain you're in… but what you're doing can't make you happy. It can't be.”

“You don't know that.” Kyoko laughed an empty laugh. “I'm actually very happy right now… happier than you. Who do you think you are, trying to talk down to me like that. When you're crazy…”

Hajime shook her head. “I'm not crazy, I'm healing. And I'm not the one trying to convince someone else to commit a crime while falling ill. I'm not the one getting enjoyment from kicking someone when they're down. If anyone looks crazy right now, it's you.”

“Shut the hell up. Miho talks to you once and you get bold. I don't know what she told you, and I don't care. You know nothing.”

“Okay fine. I don't know anything. But at the very least… could you please leave me and my friends alone…?

“You two know each other?” Tamami asked, her eyes huge.

Kyoko ignored Tamami and glared at Hajime, “You’re an idiot if you think I’m going to give up on you. I always get what I want… and you’re no exception. One of these days… I will get you.”

With that, Kyoko disappeared, and Hajime ran over to Tamami, snatching the lighter away from her. 

“I really wasn’t going to burn your house down… I swear…! This is all so crazy, Kyoko is...”

“How did you meet her?” Hajime demanded.

“She approached me one day in Roppongi Hills… I was hiding out there because I had just gotten into a fight with my mother… she complimented my necklace. She kept calling me cute too, which made me so happy.”

“Of course it did.” Hajime hid her annoyance - it was like Kyoko was a dog, being able to sniff out people's insecurities and use them to her advantage! It was just like Miho had said.

“She said she could help me improve my life. She said she could help me be happy… and that she and I are similar. She told me that her situation is similar to mine, and that she was the only person who understands. I believed it… I trusted her, but she...” Tamami's voice trailed off.

“But why? Surely she told you she was a demon…”

“I know, I know… but I felt like I had no choice… everyone else hates me. She didn't. I felt like she was there for me… more so than my actual friends. She never had anything bad to say about me. I told you earlier, Ayame, Natalia and Saya called me trash and a headache. You called me toxic…”

“Just because you have some toxic traits doesn't make you all bad.” Hajime told her.

“Explain why everyone turned on me then.” Tamami challenged.

“They don't hate you. They hate your behavior. They hate that you can be a bad person most of the time. It's frustrating because we know that you aren't a bad person… you're only acting like this because of how you were raised. That's not the end for you, you can still be a better person… without Kyoko’s interference.”

“But how? How can I be a better person? Kyoko… she said that she knows my future, and…”

“That’s how she gets you! I don’t want to blame everything on her, but she was also ‘friends’ with me for a while… she influenced me into doing what I did… and it lead to me having a mental breakdown and almost ending my life. She’s a liar! Don’t trust her!”

“But it’s hard… I feel like no matter what I do… I’m just a mindless follower, who follows whoever she thinks can make her life better… first Mom, then Ayame, then Hinako, now her… what’s next?”

Hajime sighed deeply. “I understand completely… because I was in the same position. But… then I realized… only we can rely on ourselves to fix our futures.”

Tamami was in disbelief. “But how? I feel stuck… like I  _ have _ to be like this. Like you said… I saw my mom and thought her behavior was normal. It's habitual… how can I fix this?”

“That will take work. I have been working on myself for the last two months and even now I find myself slipping into Old Hajime. A wise person once told me it's not an overnight thing…”

“Then what's the point?”

“The point is… when I feel good now, I feel really good, something I haven't experienced. Sometimes I hate myself and sometimes I hate my therapist. Sometimes I want to stop. But then I look at all the changes that I made over the last few weeks, and I realize that I did a good thing… I really think you would benefit from seeing one too.”

“You think so?”

“Yes. Because even though I yelled at you earlier… I still like you as a friend. I like everyone as a friend and I consider everyone in our group to be my family. All I want is for all of us to be happy. So please consider…”

“Okay. I'll think about it.” Tamami told her. “I need a lot of help… unlearning my mom's behavior, getting help with this complex about my appearance, and trying to become more confident in myself and my abilities. I'll do my best. I'll find a therapist in the new year… one that will help me be the Tamami I want to be. But until then…”

“What is it?”

“I will reflect on my actions and behavior, and I will try my best not to mindlessly follow anyone around. I will do my best to be my own person, so I'm going to need space for a while. I'm going to delete all my social media too, since it has caused more problems than anything else.”

All Hajime could do was smile at her. “I think that's a good idea… us two especially need time away from each other. So where are you going to go?”

“I'm going to use the little money I have to leave town and give myself a fresh start…”

“You're leaving? That's a little extreme.”

“Yes… but I think living on my own, without help from my mother, will help me mature.” Tamami explained. “I've been thinking about this for awhile… do you think it's a good idea?”

“I don't know…” Hajime admitted. “Will you be okay on your own?”

“I'll have to be. I don't know where I'm going, but once I get there, I'll send everyone a letter. That will explain the situation, so that no one will worry. When I feel ready, I'll apologize to everyone… but right now, the most important thing is getting away from my mother.”

“I agree. I don't know what you are going to do, but I wish you the best of luck with everything. But first… I want to give you this. Consider this an early Christmas present.” 

Hajime went back upstairs to her room, and got the pearl ring that Miho gave her. Then she walked back downstairs, handing it to Tamami. 

“Ah… it's so cute! Thank you. But why this?”

“To protect yourself from demons pretending to be angels.”

xxxxx

Hajime woke up the next morning to find that Tamami did exactly what she said she was going to do - leave as soon as the sun came up. Hajime could only hope that nothing bad had happened to her, but her anxiety subdued when she saw that Tamami sent her a picture of a train ticket on Christmas Eve - she had decided to move to a smaller city, one several hours away. Hajime wished her luck once again, and Tamami thanked her. That was that.

Christmas itself flew by - Hajime spent the entire day doing pottery. She got a few messages from Hinako and Natalia, and talked to them for a bit. Some of Natalia's family members came from Brazil, and Hinako had spent the day with the Hakozaki family. They both seemed to be having a good time, and Hajime tried her best not to be jealous.

As for Saya, she wished her a Merry Christmas, and Hajime said Merry Christmas back. The conversation ended there.

It was as if Saya's confession never happened, Hajime thought… but everything changed on the morning of the 27th.

“Good morning Hajime,” Saya sent to her. “I hope you are feeling better… my birthday is tomorrow, and I want to know before buying the tickets… are you coming? I think you would like it.”

Hajime didn't answer, she couldn't. But what she did know was that she needed advice, so she decided to get dressed. She was going to pay Hinako a visit.

After arriving, Hinako let her in, and the two were in Hinako's bedroom. 

“Look at this!” Hinako cheered, pointing to a porcelain doll. Hajime had never seen her before, and she had light brown hair and hazel eyes. “Momo got me this as a gift!”

“Really? She's pretty. What are you going to name her?” Hajime asked. 

“I've been thinking about it for the last two days, and I think I'm going to name her… Arisa!”

“Arisa? That's interesting.”

“How?”

“Every other doll of yours has a Western name. I think this is the first time you gave one of your dolls a Japanese one.”

“Yes. She has motherly feelings, so I named her after my mom. Eugenie likes her a lot, and so does Elizabeth, but she's feeling shy. I am sure they will all be great friends, once they get to know each other.”

“I'm glad to hear that.” Hajime said. “I'm happy you gave Arisa a meaningful name.”

“I hope she's proud of me… I wonder what she's thinking. I look forward to the day that we can meet again.”

“Um… Hinako.”

“No! Don't get the wrong idea! I'm going to keep doing my best. I'm going to live for her and the twins. I have to! But until then… Serika and Noriko got me this!”

Hinako pointed to an ornate gold heart shaped locket that she was wearing. She opened it, and showed Hajime the picture that was inside - it was the picture of Hinako and her mother, the same one that Hajime had torn to pieces.

“That’s really cool. I'm glad you have a place to put your picture…”

“It's super cool! Now she is always with me wherever I go… and the locket is so pretty… it's something fit for a princess, isn't it?”

“Yes.” Hajime laughed a little bit. “Never change, Hinako.”

“That's enough about me. How was your Christmas?” Hinako asked.

“Lonely. I just made pottery, but don't feel too bad. It was nice having the house to myself.”

“As long as you enjoy it, that's all that matters. Oh yes… did you know Saya's birthday is tomorrow? I can't believe I ever disliked her… she's so nice. I wonder what she is going to do to celebrate. Did she tell you?”

“About that…” Hajime sighed nervously. “She asked me to go somewhere… the tree garden.”

“Oh! Did you say yes? It's so cool over there… Natalia, Ayame and I went yesterday! We took Serika and Noriko, and Natalia brought her cousin… Lucio? He's cute and seems to be interested in me!”

“Oh?” Hajime asked. 

“Yeah… we talked so much that I kind of forgot that Natalia, Ayame and the kids were with us… Natalia must've told him that I like the Milk and Honey Cafe, because he wants to take me there… but…”

“But what?”

“I don't know… I feel like… I don't deserve it. And… you…”

“What about me?”

Hinako sighed. “He's staying in Japan for a while, he's studying abroad. I don't want to hurt you if we actually… you know.”

“Don't worry about me.” Hajime told her. 

“But I can't help it… I know how you feel and I want to be considerate… I don't want to cause you more trouble…”

“I'll be fine! And besides… if he gives you good feelings, you should act on them. And he likes you too? Go for it!”

Hinako started giggling. “Really? He's smart and  _ such  _ a gentleman, I can't stop thinking about him! I wonder if he's meant to my prince?”

“Geez, Hinako! We were talking about the tree garden!”

“Oh right…” Hinako quickly composed herself. “The tree garden… I think you would like it. I think you should go… especially with Saya!”

“That's the thing… I'm scared to go. As pathetic as this sounds… I'm afraid to do anything with Saya for now… or ever.”

“Huh? Why? Did she hurt you?” Hinako's eyes got bigger.

“No… no.” Hajime shook her head. “It's just… she told me that she liked me. Like… she has a crush on me.”

“That's so exciting! She confessed! What happened next? Did you say yes? Did you?”

“No… I actually freaked out on her and ran away… because I'm fucking stupid.”

“Eh? What? Don't say that.”

“It's true though.”

“No it isn't. Be nicer to yourself, Hajime. Anyway… why did you that? What were you feeling?”

“I was feeling like she was playing a joke on me… I felt like, and I still feel like she was messing around. Think about it… Saya is nice and cute. She's friendly and kind, with a bubbly personality. She's also very popular too. Then there's me…”

“What about you? You have good points too. You are a good friend and you take really good care of people you care about… even doing things you don't like to make the other person feel better… I  _ know _ how you feel about Cinderella, but you'll still watch it with me when I'm feeling down. Besides that, you're smart and artistic, and you're also very thoughtful… you're a very good person!”

“You think so?”

“I of all people would know.” Hinako told her. “But you don't seem to believe it, which is the problem.”

“You’re right… as much as I like Saya… I feel like me dating her would end badly… you were right. I shouldn't be focusing on a relationship right now. I don't have a healthy level of self-esteem, and I really don't want to dump my issues on Saya… or anyone else.”

“Did you tell Saya this?”

Hajime shook her head. “I can't… as silly as this sounds, I'm afraid. I'm afraid that she'll desert me. I'm afraid that she'll make fun of me on her blog…”

“Saya wouldn't do that.” Hinako reminded Hajime. “She never posts negative entries on there…”

“But she might desert me…”

“She might, if you don't tell her what's going on. But if you do tell her the truth… I think she will be super understanding. It's Saya! You can do it, Hajime.”

“I have no idea what to say… ugh.”

“Just tell her what's on your mind. Be honest. This is a situation where you definitely want to tell the truth! I'm rooting for you!”

“Thank you… I really appreciate it.” 

“Of course! I hope everything goes well!”

xxxxx

After leaving Hinako's house, Hajime decided to place her anxiety to the side for a little but and call Saya later that evening. As the phone rang, Hajime found herself wishing that Saya wouldn't pick up, but she picked up on the third ring.

“Hajime? Good evening.” Saya greeted. “Did you get my message this morning? Wait… you're definitely calling about that.”

“Yes… and no. First, I wanted to apologize for freaking out like that at Roppongi Hills. I didn't mean to accuse you of playing a joke on me… or insulting you like I did. I just… I need to get better at controlling my feelings.”

“It's okay. Looking back… I kind of just sprung it on you, which probably was a bad idea… so I apologize if I startled you with my confession.”

“Oh… um… it's okay.” Hajime told her. “As for your message… I'll go with you to the tree garden.”

“Really?” Saya's voice seem to have brightened. “I'm so happy! This will be the best birthday ever! Let's meet tomorrow at 7 pm!”

“Why so late?”

“It's better experienced at night.”

“It is?”

“Yes. You'll see why for yourself! This is so exciting! I'll see you tomorrow, okay?”

“Okay.” Hajime found herself smiling, even though Saya couldn't see her. That conversation went by better than expected, Hajime realized. Hopefully, the trip to the tree garden would go over just as well. 

It had to.

xxxxx

Despite not sounding very exciting at all, Hajime found the tree garden to be very exciting. That probably had something to do with the fact that she had never seen something like this before - actual tree garden was a section of the park, filled with trees. Every tree had a sensor in front of it, that one was supposed to put their hand on.

“It looks dark…” Hajime observed. “Maybe we should've came here while the sun was up? I can't see anything.”

“You can't see anything  _ for now _ !” Saya corrected. “See that?” she pointed out to the sensor in front of them. When Hajime was staring at it, Saya continued. “Place your hand on it.”

“My hand…? Okay…” Hajime slowly did what she was told, she didn't know what to expect, but she wasn't expecting for the tree in front of her to light up. As the tree exploded into lights and colors, Hajime pulled her hand off of the sensor, her heart beating loudly. “Oh my God!” she shouted, obviously startled by this.

“It's cool, isn't it?” Saya asked.

Hajime nodded slowly. “I wasn't expecting that… it's almost like the tree came alive. It's cool though… how did you find out about this place anyway?”

“Kaori told me! We were talking about date ideas and…”

“Do you consider this to be a date?!” Hajime blurted out. 

“I mean… not in the traditional sense. We aren't a couple.” Saya reminded her. “Or at least… that's what I assumed, because of how you reacted to my confession.”

“I see… I'm so embarrassing.” Hajime covered her face with her hands.

“I hope you're feeling better about it now.”

“About that… I was thinking about it, and I think I should tell you how I feel.”

“Right now?” Saya suddenly looked embarrassed.

“Yes… right now.” Hajime nodded. “I couldn't tell you then, because I was afraid, but I can tell you now - I need more time to think about it.”

“What do you mean?”

“I feel like… it wouldn't be fair to you if we started dating. Especially right now… I'm still learning how to get a better handle on my feelings, and I'm still trying to build confidence in myself, and not sabotage my attempts to be happy…” Hajime sighed. “I'm sorry you couldn't fall in love with a normal person.”

“But you are a normal person.”

“I am not. Back when I thought Hinako was confessing her feelings to me, she said something very interesting - that I am not fit to be in relationship right now… it hurt back then, because I liked her, but now… she's right. I don't want to accidentally hurt you because I feel bad about myself.”

“That's completely understandable, and it's really mature of you to say that. I respect it.” Saya said. “You've really been through a lot… of course it would affect you.”

“I don't want it to define me though… but it's hard. I keep telling myself that I don't deserve you. Not even as a girlfriend, but as a friend… I wonder if it'll ever end…”

“It will, and I believe that one day, you'll feel deserving… old habits die hard, and it's only been two months. Don't beat yourself up over it. But with that said… I think you're doing a good job. I'm so proud of you.”

“You are? Even though I don't feel comfortable dating you right now?”

“Of course. I would much rather have you happy and not dating me instead of you being miserable and dating me. Your reasons for not wanting to date me are perfectly fine… I'll get over it... eventually.”

“There's also the future. Maybe when I'm feeling well enough… here's the thing. I  _ want  _ to date you, it's not like I don't like you or anything… But I know that it's not wise right now.”

“Exactly…” Saya sighed. “Better safe than sorry, I guess. But besides that, I'm truly happy for you.”

“Me too. And I'm proud of myself. I never would've thought that I'd end up feeling like this.”

“Like what?”

“Two months ago, I felt like the world was coming to an end. You remember what I commented on your blog, right? That it felt like I was falling into a well and being suffocated by the darkness? That was true. I could barely sleep or eat, I felt like if I kept going like that… my physical condition would fail so much that I'd die, if I didn't end up ending it myself.”

“Hajime…”

“But now… things are different. For the first time in a long time, I am looking forward to the future. Hinako and Natalia are on good terms with me again. Ayame is willing to start over, after we both have healed… and Tamami… she's gone, but I have a feeling that she finally got it… even if she never apologizes to us… she'll at least be a better person to the people around her. She'll be a better person to herself too.”

“Yeah… I got the letter in the mail today.” Saya sighed. “Apparently, she told Ayame in person, on Christmas Eve. Ayame called me this morning… to say happy birthday. She was pretty devastated that Tamami left, which is interesting to me, because she seemed to be so mad at her. But Ayame said that Tamami's move is for the better, so she can't feel  _ too  _ bad. That's how I feel about it.”

“Same here… but like I was saying… it's nothing drastic, but things are slowly changing for the better. It makes me wonder what else will get change. That's not to say that following this path has been easy, because it's not. Sometimes I do go back to my old mindset, and I still get depressed from time to time. Even then… this is the first time in a very long time that I have been truly happy… and I love it.”

“And we all love seeing it.” Saya told her. “Um… this may be a weird request, but can you do me a favor?”

“Sure. What is it?”

“You should turn the tree on so I can take a picture for my blog. Don't worry, you won't be in the picture. I'm only getting the tree.”

“Okay…” Hajime turned her attention back to the sensor, and placed her hand on it. 

The tree lit up, but this time, Hajime wasn't startled by it. As Saya took the picture with her phone, Hajime stared up at it, thinking to herself. Just like the current state of the tree, Hajime's future looked similar - bright and beautiful.

And she couldn't wait to see it for herself.

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The end! This was so fun to write, even though there was a brief period where I wanted to give up. At least now I can say that my work schedule is not impossible to write around... 
> 
> But yes this is my favorite of the 3 fics on my account so far. I have nothing else to say but vote for Natalia in the upcoming election! Also most importantly, thank you for reading! I really appreciate you guys, even the silent ones! 
> 
> Until next time!


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